"The Return Of Hacksaw" [My New Fan-Fic] - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

callmetootie · 06-06-2001, 05:29 PM

"The Return Of Hacksaw"

Season 7

[Blair selling an item to an old lady]

Old Lady: Hello young girl, I'am looking for a clock.
Blair: Well, we have penguin clocks, dinosaur clocks, and my favorite: a bloomingdales clock.
Old Lady: You don't sell regular, standard, basic clocks. How Am I supposed to know if these things even tick!
Blair: I'm sure they tick.
Old Lady: You're ticking me off. You kids are all the same.

[Lady leaves the store]

Jo: So Blair, you scared another customer today?
Blair: I didn't, she wasn't very nice, she didn't like the bloomingdale's clock.
Jo: I know the perfect place to stick the clock.

[Phone rings]
[Man on the phone]

Jo: Hello, Over Our Heads, how may I help you?
Man: Jo, is that you my little pizza maker?
Jo: Who is this....Oh No! Hacksaw!!!!!!
Hacksaw: Yep, that's me babe. How is my little pumpkin honeybun doing?
Jo: I was better 30 seconds ago.
Hacksaw: Listen cupcake, I'm stopping by at your store, and me and you can do something. Ok?
Jo: Hacksaw, you're making my stomach hurt. Ok, but NO dates!
Hacksaw: Ok Babe.
Jo: And stop calling me Babe!

[2 hours later]
[A knock at the door]

Jo: Oh boy.
Hacksaw: Hey babe, give me some sugar and honey and...
Jo: You are a tree trunk!
Hacksaw: I hoped you noticed, I made them this morning just for you!
Jo: What do you mean Hacksaw, how did you make those muslces so fast?
Hacksaw: You know Jo, we are made for eachother.
Jo: You didn't answer me..how did you get them?
Hacksaw: Jo, I'm dying.
Jo: What?
Hacksaw: I had an overdose of steroids.

[Close up of Jo's face]

Jo: Hacksaw, I'm so sorry. But why Hacksaw? Why did you ruin your life?
Hacksaw: I did it for you Jo. I always had this big thing about you, and I want to spend my last days with you.
Jo: Hacksaw, I'm sorry.

[They look into eachothers eyes]
[They kiss]

Jo: Hacksaw, I love you.

[The next day Hacksaw stayed at a hotel overnight and never came bac to the store]

Jo: What happpened to Hacksaw?
Blair: I don't know, but I can't belive that he would do that.

[Jo turns on the Morning News]

The Reporter: It has been reported to be that a young man by the name of Johnathan "Hacksaw" Bertinelli was found dead in his hotel room last night. The cause was an overdose of steroids, and sleeping pills.

[Jo cries, and lays her head on Blair]

THE END.

------------------
Andrew Carden

[This message has been edited by callmetootie (edited 06-07-2001).]

callmetootie · 06-06-2001, 09:52 PM

What do you think of it?

------------------
Andrew Carden

Max Whittaker · 06-06-2001, 09:58 PM

I'm...not sure... Let me think about this some more, OK?

------------------
Can't we all just get along?

Live long and prosper.

What if I die an old maid in Avonlea without ever being kissed...or swooned?~Felicity King

Max Whittaker · 06-06-2001, 10:14 PM

Let me get this straight, Jo said that she LOVED Hacksaw?

------------------
Can't we all just get along?

Live long and prosper.

What if I die an old maid in Avonlea without ever being kissed...or swooned?~Felicity King

coily2 · 06-07-2001, 08:41 AM

No wonder she married that turd Rick.... She was pining away for a love she could never have - Hacksaw.

JoJoJoJoJoJoJoJoJo · 06-07-2001, 11:12 AM

whose hacksaw?

james_baby87 · 02-09-2003, 03:54 PM

I know its late for an answer but Hacksaw was this huge guy that had a crush on Jo. He met her in the episode where Jo had a pizza business.

Rebel Queen 1980 · 02-09-2003, 10:17 PM

Ermmm,your plot is a little bit confusing,but it's fair.

jinnygirl2005 · 02-11-2003, 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by coily2
No wonder she married that turd Rick.... She was pining away for a love she could never have - Hacksaw.

I like rick!

she loved hacksaw!!! he was the roy of the later season though. wow I confused myself

06-06-2001, 05:29 PM	#1
callmetootie Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 06, 2001 Location: Clifton Park, NY Posts: 4,768	"The Return Of Hacksaw" [My New Fan-Fic] "The Return Of Hacksaw" Season 7 [Blair selling an item to an old lady] Old Lady: Hello young girl, I'am looking for a clock. Blair: Well, we have penguin clocks, dinosaur clocks, and my favorite: a bloomingdales clock. Old Lady: You don't sell regular, standard, basic clocks. How Am I supposed to know if these things even tick! Blair: I'm sure they tick. Old Lady: You're ticking me off. You kids are all the same. [Lady leaves the store] Jo: So Blair, you scared another customer today? Blair: I didn't, she wasn't very nice, she didn't like the bloomingdale's clock. Jo: I know the perfect place to stick the clock. [Phone rings] [Man on the phone] Jo: Hello, Over Our Heads, how may I help you? Man: Jo, is that you my little pizza maker? Jo: Who is this....Oh No! Hacksaw!!!!!! Hacksaw: Yep, that's me babe. How is my little pumpkin honeybun doing? Jo: I was better 30 seconds ago. Hacksaw: Listen cupcake, I'm stopping by at your store, and me and you can do something. Ok? Jo: Hacksaw, you're making my stomach hurt. Ok, but NO dates! Hacksaw: Ok Babe. Jo: And stop calling me Babe! [2 hours later] [A knock at the door] Jo: Oh boy. Hacksaw: Hey babe, give me some sugar and honey and... Jo: You are a tree trunk! Hacksaw: I hoped you noticed, I made them this morning just for you! Jo: What do you mean Hacksaw, how did you make those muslces so fast? Hacksaw: You know Jo, we are made for eachother. Jo: You didn't answer me..how did you get them? Hacksaw: Jo, I'm dying. Jo: What? Hacksaw: I had an overdose of steroids. [Close up of Jo's face] Jo: Hacksaw, I'm so sorry. But why Hacksaw? Why did you ruin your life? Hacksaw: I did it for you Jo. I always had this big thing about you, and I want to spend my last days with you. Jo: Hacksaw, I'm sorry. [They look into eachothers eyes] [They kiss] Jo: Hacksaw, I love you. [The next day Hacksaw stayed at a hotel overnight and never came bac to the store] Jo: What happpened to Hacksaw? Blair: I don't know, but I can't belive that he would do that. [Jo turns on the Morning News] The Reporter: It has been reported to be that a young man by the name of Johnathan "Hacksaw" Bertinelli was found dead in his hotel room last night. The cause was an overdose of steroids, and sleeping pills. [Jo cries, and lays her head on Blair] THE END. ------------------ Andrew Carden [This message has been edited by callmetootie (edited 06-07-2001).]

02-09-2003, 03:54 PM	#7
james_baby87 ~PussNBoots~ Senior Member Join Date: Jul 21, 2002 Location: JBoro Chica! Posts: 1,108	I know its late for an answer but Hacksaw was this huge guy that had a crush on Jo. He met her in the episode where Jo had a pizza business.
	__________________ -Me ~Meghan~ a.k.a ~Trouble~ Email: i_love_my__boyfriend@hotmail.com MSN Messenger: i_love_my__boyfriend Yahoo!: angelgirl200060 Any of Ya'll can add me I dont care I'm a nut whatcha gunna do about it? want you favorite TV show on DVD go to www.tvshowsondvd.com and vote Regrestration is FREE

06-06-2001, 09:52 PM	#2
callmetootie Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 06, 2001 Location: Clifton Park, NY Posts: 4,768	What do you think of it? ------------------ Andrew Carden

06-06-2001, 09:58 PM	#3
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	I'm...not sure... Let me think about this some more, OK? ------------------ Can't we all just get along? Live long and prosper. What if I die an old maid in Avonlea without ever being kissed...or swooned?~Felicity King

06-06-2001, 10:14 PM	#4
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	Let me get this straight, Jo said that she LOVED Hacksaw? ------------------ Can't we all just get along? Live long and prosper. What if I die an old maid in Avonlea without ever being kissed...or swooned?~Felicity King

06-07-2001, 08:41 AM	#5
coily2 Member Forum Regular Join Date: Dec 28, 2000 Location: Chicago, IL Posts: 969	No wonder she married that turd Rick.... She was pining away for a love she could never have - Hacksaw.

06-07-2001, 11:12 AM	#6
JoJoJoJoJoJoJoJoJo A and J Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: May 31, 2001 Location: .S.C. Posts: 3,070	whose hacksaw?

02-09-2003, 10:17 PM	#8
Rebel Queen 1980 Member Senior Member Join Date: Nov 05, 2002 Location: Watching Classic Sitcoms 24/7.... Posts: 1,509	Ermmm,your plot is a little bit confusing,but it's fair.