What’s your birth order?

[brie]

Do you think your birth order makes a difference in how you interact with your family? How about with other people?

[Courtnee]

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.

[Ireneparalegal]

I don't think so. It may play a part for some people, but not in general. My late brother was the "youngest" until I was adopted. He was 10 when I was adopted. So, for ten years he thought he was the youngest, but no more.

Then, I was the youngest, until my father remarried and he had a son with his wife when I was 10 years old. Nothing changed. I was no longer the youngest, but it didn't change anything abt me.

My youngest daughter was 13 when I had my son. So for 13 years she was the youngest and again, nothing changed simply because she is now the middle child.

I think people read too much into birth order. They may try and use it to their advantage or disadvantage - ala Jan Brady on the Brady Bunch....

[brie]

Originally Posted by Courtnee

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.

I hear a lot of firstborns say that.

[brie]

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

I don't think so. It may play a part for some people, but not in general. My late brother was the "youngest" until I was adopted. He was 10 when I was adopted. So, for ten years he thought he was the youngest, but no more.

Then, I was the youngest, until my father remarried and he had a son with his wife when I was 10 years old. Nothing changed. I was no longer the youngest, but it didn't change anything abt me.

My youngest daughter was 13 when I had my son. So for 13 years she was the youngest and again, nothing changed simply because she is now the middle child.

I think people read too much into birth order. They may try and use it to their advantage or disadvantage - ala Jan Brady on the Brady Bunch....

In general, if a pattern is set, I think it happens fairly early in life. I am a middle child, but my sister is five years older so she was an only for a long time (and has never forgiven me for being born ). My brother and I are closer in age, so sometimes I act like an oldest child, and sometimes I act like a twin. People sometimes think I am an only. I also thought about Jan: "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha." Although I am a middle child, I didn't share Jan's experience.

[LuLu Rogers]

I'm the oldest and I agree, my parents are much more strict with me than they are with my two younger sisters. It really sucks. There's also the age difference between us, my sisters are five and seven years younger than me so we don't always get along.

[Hollow]

Originally Posted by brie

I hear a lot of firstborns say that.

often enough, the parents are just being realistic. children of different ages need to be given different expectations. a 13-year-old is capable of much more responsibility than a six-year-old, for example.

i don't know about how one's birth order affects interactions with people outside the family, but it's true that it sometimes does within the family/household.

[brie]

Originally Posted by Jack Nicholson's Lady

I'm the oldest and I agree, my parents are much more strict with me than they are with my two younger sisters. It really sucks. There's also the age difference between us, my sisters are five and seven years younger than me so we don't always get along.

Sounds like the same age difference and interaction pattern as my siblings and me. I think a lot depends on how you look at it. My brother and I always thought my sister got to do more things than we did (of course she did; she was older )

[brie]

Originally Posted by safety pin

often enough, the parents are just being realistic. children of different ages need to be given different expectations. a 13-year-old is capable of much more responsibility than a six-year-old, for example.

i don't know about how one's birth order affects interactions with people outside the family, but it's true that it sometimes does within the family/household.

I also think a lot of parents are more cautious with their firstborn. They relax a little after they see that they didn't break the child.

[Number 9 Dream]

I'm the first born and I definitely didn't get away with as much as my brothers did! I was expected to be the smart, responsible one in a way.

[Already Gone]

I'm the youngest, there is 12 years between my brother and I and 16 years between my sister and I. I never noticed a difference on how I reacted within the family or outside of it.

[coffield3]

Middle of three!

[brie]

Originally Posted by Number 9 Dream

I'm the first born and I definitely didn't get away with as much as my brothers did! I was expected to be the smart, responsible one in a way.

Sounds like you had to meet your parents' expectations. Many firstborns say this. It seems to me that it's more about the parents (maybe their anxieties) than about the child. Doesn't sound like it was a bad thing, though.

[Mikado]

Originally Posted by Courtnee

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.

Boy do I know THAT one!!!!!!!

[brie]

Originally Posted by Summer Breeze

I'm the youngest, there is 12 years between my brother and I and 16 years between my sister and I. I never noticed a difference on how I reacted within the family or outside of it.

Wow, that's a huge difference. In many ways, you are probably like an only (you didn't have to share toys with siblings; you didn't have siblings your age to play/argue with, etc.). People very often ask me my birth order - based on how they are evaluating my behaviors. Hardly anyone ever pegs me as a middle child.