Imagination Can Be Dangerous - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Mustang Mimi 04 · 03-03-2001, 02:54 PM

Classroom
Teacher: So I want you all to imagine a fight. How it starts, remarks that are shared back and forth- true statements and false ones- how it is resolved and the overall outcome.
Natalie (to herself): Oh I don’t have to imagine a fight- I live on a battleground.
Lounge
Tootie is playing cards with Blair. Jo is reading a magazine. Natalie comes downstairs carrying Mrs G’s bag.
Mrs G: Ok girls- I’m only going to be a few days with Raymond. You’ll have to go out and pick up some food from the store. Oh and Jo, Blair, don’t kill each other. Pleeeease.
Jo: Right Mrs G. Have a good time.
Mrs G leaves.
Nat: So Jo, Blair what are you guys fighting about nowadays? Fashion, bathroom times, boys?
Jo: Not really anything. Blair’s finally learned how to treat me like a human.
Blair: Yeah and Jo’s finally gotten some fashion.
Nat: Oh come on you guys. Its getting boring around here. You need to be arguing about something.
Tootie: Nat will you just let bygones be bygones. Its quiet- lets keep it that way.
Nat: I suppose your right. Well I have some homework to do.
Nat goes upstairs. She sits on her bed.
Nat: Well now what am I going to do? I mean I SUPPOSE i could imagine up a fight but it would just be so much more realistic if I could base it on Jo and Blair.
Nat sits there. Suddenly she looks up with a sly smile.
Nat: Well if they don’t have anything to fight about I’ll give them something to fight about.
Next day.
Jo’s sitting on the couch reading. Nat comes in.
Nat: Hey Jo.
Jo: What’s up?
Nat: Jo, I heard Blair talking to a few of her friends yesterday.
Jo: So?
Nat: Don’t you want to know what she was saying?
Jo: Why would I care?
Nat: It was about you.
Jo: Oh?
Nat: She was bragging about how with her looks she could get any man. Then she starting going on and on about how with your looks you couldn’t get any date except pity dates.
Jo has a wide eyed, opened mouth shocked look on her face.
Jo: She’s going to pay for this!
Jo goes upstairs.
Nat: That’s what I’m counting on.
Later. Blair is sitting on her bed reading a magazine. Natalie comes in the room.
Nat: Blair I have to talk to you.
Natalie shuts the door.
Blair: What’s wrong Nat?
Nat: It’s Jo.
Blair: Something happen to her?
Nat: No- it’s what she did. I heard her talking to people in school.
Blair: So?
Nat: About you.
Blair: Me? (smiling, she fluffs her hair) And what did she say?
Nat: That there’s only one reason guys date you.
Blair (smile falls away very quickly): Why?
Nat: They think they’ll get...you know...somewhere.
Blair: That’s not true.
Nat: Yeah but its what people are thinking now.
Blair: That’s it- this is war!
Blair runs out of the room. Nat turns on a radio.
On the radio: War! Huh! What is it good for? Absolutely...
Nat: Everything!
Next day.
Blair: Well I’ve got first dibs on the bathroom.
Blair leaves the bedroom to go into the bathroom. She then comes back.
Blair: I can’t find my shampoo. Jo you can go ahead I’ll go after you.
Jo: Ok thanks Blair.
Jo leaves to go to the bathroom. Blair starts looking around the room for the shampoo. A few minutes later Jo comes back into the bedroom.
Jo: Hey Blair- your shampoo was on the sink.
Blair: Oh thanks.
Blair goes to take her shower. Jo hangs up her pajamas, makes her bed, and then looks for her shoes. She finds one then sees the other by Tootie’s bed.
Jo: Hey Tootie could you toss me my other shoe?
Tootie: Sure here Jo.
Tootie looks at Jo as she tosses the shoe.
Tootie: Jo?
Jo: Hmmm?
Tootie: Umm...
Jo: What?
Tootie: Well...
Jo: Tootie spit it out.
Tootie: That’s something you might try doing.
Jo: What are you talking about?
Tootie: I’m not quite sure how to say this- Jo, your lips are-
Jo: My lips are what?!?
Tootie: Your lips are green.
Jo: WHAT?
Jo goes and looks in the mirror. Not only are her lips green- so are her teeth and every inch of the inside of her mouth. Just as we notice Jo’s mouth we hear a scream from the bathroom. Blair comes running in with bright orange hair.
Jo: Warner I oughta knock your head to Tahiti!
Blair: Jo! you...you...you should be arrested!
Memory to when Sue Ann punched Blair:
Blair: She should be arrested!
Tootie: Yeah for defacing a national treasure!
Jo: Guess you won’t be attracting too many guys now- GOLDIE LOCKS
Blair: I’m going to rip your hair out! You- you- jealous gangrened mouthed witch! Though you won’t be mouthing off anymore!
Jo tackles Blair and they wrestle on the floor. Natalie stands there watching. Tootie finally comes running over.
Tootie: Stop- quit it you guys. Nat aren’t you going to do anything?
Nat: Well (hesitates) alright- guys that’s enough. Break it up!
Tootie and Nat pull Jo and Blair away from each other.
Jo: I’d like to break something up!
Blair: Let me at her- let me at her!
Tootie manages to pull Blair out of the room. Nat runs over and locks the door. Then we hear a BANG.
Blair (from the hall): Ooooh. Pain.
Jo (shouts): Ha! She can’t even win a battle with a door. She’s lucky that door is between us. Lucky- you hear me? Lucky!
Out in the hall.
Tootie: Come on Blair lets go downstairs and calm down.
Blair: Fine. (shouts) But I’m coming back!
They go downstairs. Back in the room...
Nat: Ok you just calm down. I have some work I need to do.
Natalie sits down at the desk and starts writing. Jo picks up a book.
A little later Nat looks at her watch.
Nat: Oh its almost lunch time. I need to go pick up some groceries. I’ll be back in a while- don’t kill Blair. At least not while I’m gone.
Jo: Whatever.
Natalie leaves. Jo gets up and walks by the desk. She notices that her name is on what Nat was just writing. Intrigued, she picks up the papers and starts reading them.

Page 2
Step 1: Jo and Blair started by pulling pranks on each other. Jo put orange dye in Blair’s shampoo and Blair put green dye in Jo’s toothpaste. Needless to say, neither was very happy with their “new look”.
Step 2: After they confronted each other, Jo and Blair started screaming. This started with them calling each other names and led to threats of broken bones and even murder!
Step 3: After the name calling, Jo decided to take things to the next step. She leaped at Blair, knocking her over. Then they started fighting on the ground. I was mentally taking notes but after Tootie insisted, I helped pull them away...
Jo: Hmm, if this is page 2 then what’s page one?
Jo starts shuffling through the papers.
Jo: Here it is.

Page 1
I’ve decided to do my paper on a realistic fight between my friends Jo and Blair. They are almost always fighting about something. Unfortunately on this particular day they were not. So with a little outside help, a fight was started...

Jo looked up from the paper. Suddenly she ran out of the room and downstairs.
Jo: Blair!
When Blair sees Jo she throws up her fists.
Blair: Alright, I’m ready for ya.
Jo: No-look I found something. Read this.
Blair takes the paper. After finished reading she looks up kind of confused.
Blair: What’s this?
Jo: Natalie was writing that.
Blair: So?
Jo (a little frustrated): Did you tell people that my looks could only get me a pity date?
Blair: NO! Though we both know I’ve got great looks I would never say something like that- at least not to your face. (pauses) Wait- did you tell others that guys only want to go out with me to...you know...
Jo: No way! Hey sometimes I don’t show it but I’ve got more respect for you than that. Who told you I said that?
Jo and Blair: Natalie!
Blair: So she started a fight? Why would she do that?
Jo: That’s what I want to know.
Suddenly Natalie comes in the door with some groceries but Jo and Blair don’t notice.
Jo: I really don’t see why someone would want to start a fight.
Natalie hears this and realizes what they are talking about. She puts the bag down and starts tiptoeing up the stairs.
Blair: Natalie! Oh Natalie dear could you come hear for just a sec?
Jo: Yes please do- I’d like to talk with you.
Nat: Oh but I just need to get back to my homework.
Blair: I’m sure you do. But considering we are the homework, perhaps you’d like to spend some time with us.
Nat: So you found my work.
Jo: Yes- could you please explain why you would want to start a fight?
Nat: Well I had this assignment.
Blair: What teacher tells students to go around starting fights?
Nat: Well we were supposed to write about (she quickly slurs together) an imagined (talks regular again) fight.
Blair: I’m sorry I think I missed those middle words there. Could you say them a little slower?
Nat: It was supposed to be an imagined fight. But you guys usually are quibbling about something. I thought it might be more realistic if I wrote about you guys fighting. But when I found out you weren’t arguing over anything I decided to make something for you to quarrel over. I’m sorry.
Blair: I understand. Well get rid of that paper, buy me a bottle that is the closest match of my -ahem- natural color and we’ll call things even.
Nat (joking): And what color would that be Blair?
Nat and Blair laugh.
Jo: Well I hate to spoil this lovely moment but I’m not ready to say its all (puts up hand like she’s quoting) “fair and square”. I want some sort of revenge.
Nat: Will this involve rearranging my face?
Jo: Well I had a better idea...
Suddenly we see Nat running out of the bathroom- she’s got green teeth AND bright orange hair. Jo and Blair, still in the bathroom, give each other a five. Mrs G comes in the door. The girls all come downstairs to greet her. She sees Jo’s green mouth, Blair’s orange hair, and Nat’s hair and teeth and is shocked.
Mrs G: Are you girls auditioning for the circus? What happened while I was gone?
Jo (so fast that no one can really understand her): Well Nat caused Blair and me to get into a fight and I colored Blair’s hair orange and she made my teeth green then we found out it was Nat’s doing that we were in a fight so we got revenge.
Mrs G (sort of stunned by how fast Jo just said all of that): Well I couldn’t follow one bit of that- but I think this one I’ll just stay out of. Boy its good to be home.
Everyone laughs.
The End

------------------
Tootie: Can we sing?
Jo: Sing?
Tootie: That's what I do when I'm scared what do you do?
Jo: Slap people

Blair: A Warner is like a delicate soufle
Jo: Yeah light and empty

Nat: I'd rather be a happy magic marker than a skinny pencil

Blair: (Cliff's parents) live on a farm.
Tootie: A farm?
Jo: As in e-i-e-i-o?

Jo: Which one's the pig?
Tootie: That's predictable Jo, insulting Blair.
Jo: I wasn't insulting Blair, I
All: was insulting the pig!

BlairW_1 · 03-03-2001, 03:11 PM

This story is ATD! (Preppy talk for absolutely to die!)

------------------
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

~*Danielle*~
Go #33! Lady Bulldogs all da way! Basketball rulz!

LiL_Miss_Goodwrench_815 · 03-03-2001, 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by BlairW_1:
This story is ATD! (Preppy talk for absolutely to die!)

i couldnt agree more!! well worded!

------------------
Jo: blair do you know what this means?i never have to hear you breath again!!!
Blair: and i never have to see your ugly face again!!!

Anti-reality shows!!trying to take over sitcoms!!
the tribe has spoken,
*~Katie~*

03-03-2001, 02:54 PM	#1
Mustang Mimi 04 Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Nov 09, 2000 Posts: 122	Imagination Can Be Dangerous Classroom Teacher: So I want you all to imagine a fight. How it starts, remarks that are shared back and forth- true statements and false ones- how it is resolved and the overall outcome. Natalie (to herself): Oh I don’t have to imagine a fight- I live on a battleground. Lounge Tootie is playing cards with Blair. Jo is reading a magazine. Natalie comes downstairs carrying Mrs G’s bag. Mrs G: Ok girls- I’m only going to be a few days with Raymond. You’ll have to go out and pick up some food from the store. Oh and Jo, Blair, don’t kill each other. Pleeeease. Jo: Right Mrs G. Have a good time. Mrs G leaves. Nat: So Jo, Blair what are you guys fighting about nowadays? Fashion, bathroom times, boys? Jo: Not really anything. Blair’s finally learned how to treat me like a human. Blair: Yeah and Jo’s finally gotten some fashion. Nat: Oh come on you guys. Its getting boring around here. You need to be arguing about something. Tootie: Nat will you just let bygones be bygones. Its quiet- lets keep it that way. Nat: I suppose your right. Well I have some homework to do. Nat goes upstairs. She sits on her bed. Nat: Well now what am I going to do? I mean I SUPPOSE i could imagine up a fight but it would just be so much more realistic if I could base it on Jo and Blair. Nat sits there. Suddenly she looks up with a sly smile. Nat: Well if they don’t have anything to fight about I’ll give them something to fight about. Next day. Jo’s sitting on the couch reading. Nat comes in. Nat: Hey Jo. Jo: What’s up? Nat: Jo, I heard Blair talking to a few of her friends yesterday. Jo: So? Nat: Don’t you want to know what she was saying? Jo: Why would I care? Nat: It was about you. Jo: Oh? Nat: She was bragging about how with her looks she could get any man. Then she starting going on and on about how with your looks you couldn’t get any date except pity dates. Jo has a wide eyed, opened mouth shocked look on her face. Jo: She’s going to pay for this! Jo goes upstairs. Nat: That’s what I’m counting on. Later. Blair is sitting on her bed reading a magazine. Natalie comes in the room. Nat: Blair I have to talk to you. Natalie shuts the door. Blair: What’s wrong Nat? Nat: It’s Jo. Blair: Something happen to her? Nat: No- it’s what she did. I heard her talking to people in school. Blair: So? Nat: About you. Blair: Me? (smiling, she fluffs her hair) And what did she say? Nat: That there’s only one reason guys date you. Blair (smile falls away very quickly): Why? Nat: They think they’ll get...you know...somewhere. Blair: That’s not true. Nat: Yeah but its what people are thinking now. Blair: That’s it- this is war! Blair runs out of the room. Nat turns on a radio. On the radio: War! Huh! What is it good for? Absolutely... Nat: Everything! Next day. Blair: Well I’ve got first dibs on the bathroom. Blair leaves the bedroom to go into the bathroom. She then comes back. Blair: I can’t find my shampoo. Jo you can go ahead I’ll go after you. Jo: Ok thanks Blair. Jo leaves to go to the bathroom. Blair starts looking around the room for the shampoo. A few minutes later Jo comes back into the bedroom. Jo: Hey Blair- your shampoo was on the sink. Blair: Oh thanks. Blair goes to take her shower. Jo hangs up her pajamas, makes her bed, and then looks for her shoes. She finds one then sees the other by Tootie’s bed. Jo: Hey Tootie could you toss me my other shoe? Tootie: Sure here Jo. Tootie looks at Jo as she tosses the shoe. Tootie: Jo? Jo: Hmmm? Tootie: Umm... Jo: What? Tootie: Well... Jo: Tootie spit it out. Tootie: That’s something you might try doing. Jo: What are you talking about? Tootie: I’m not quite sure how to say this- Jo, your lips are- Jo: My lips are what?!? Tootie: Your lips are green. Jo: WHAT? Jo goes and looks in the mirror. Not only are her lips green- so are her teeth and every inch of the inside of her mouth. Just as we notice Jo’s mouth we hear a scream from the bathroom. Blair comes running in with bright orange hair. Jo: Warner I oughta knock your head to Tahiti! Blair: Jo! you...you...you should be arrested! Memory to when Sue Ann punched Blair: Blair: She should be arrested! Tootie: Yeah for defacing a national treasure! Jo: Guess you won’t be attracting too many guys now- GOLDIE LOCKS Blair: I’m going to rip your hair out! You- you- jealous gangrened mouthed witch! Though you won’t be mouthing off anymore! Jo tackles Blair and they wrestle on the floor. Natalie stands there watching. Tootie finally comes running over. Tootie: Stop- quit it you guys. Nat aren’t you going to do anything? Nat: Well (hesitates) alright- guys that’s enough. Break it up! Tootie and Nat pull Jo and Blair away from each other. Jo: I’d like to break something up! Blair: Let me at her- let me at her! Tootie manages to pull Blair out of the room. Nat runs over and locks the door. Then we hear a BANG. Blair (from the hall): Ooooh. Pain. Jo (shouts): Ha! She can’t even win a battle with a door. She’s lucky that door is between us. Lucky- you hear me? Lucky! Out in the hall. Tootie: Come on Blair lets go downstairs and calm down. Blair: Fine. (shouts) But I’m coming back! They go downstairs. Back in the room... Nat: Ok you just calm down. I have some work I need to do. Natalie sits down at the desk and starts writing. Jo picks up a book. A little later Nat looks at her watch. Nat: Oh its almost lunch time. I need to go pick up some groceries. I’ll be back in a while- don’t kill Blair. At least not while I’m gone. Jo: Whatever. Natalie leaves. Jo gets up and walks by the desk. She notices that her name is on what Nat was just writing. Intrigued, she picks up the papers and starts reading them. Page 2 Step 1: Jo and Blair started by pulling pranks on each other. Jo put orange dye in Blair’s shampoo and Blair put green dye in Jo’s toothpaste. Needless to say, neither was very happy with their “new look”. Step 2: After they confronted each other, Jo and Blair started screaming. This started with them calling each other names and led to threats of broken bones and even murder! Step 3: After the name calling, Jo decided to take things to the next step. She leaped at Blair, knocking her over. Then they started fighting on the ground. I was mentally taking notes but after Tootie insisted, I helped pull them away... Jo: Hmm, if this is page 2 then what’s page one? Jo starts shuffling through the papers. Jo: Here it is. Page 1 I’ve decided to do my paper on a realistic fight between my friends Jo and Blair. They are almost always fighting about something. Unfortunately on this particular day they were not. So with a little outside help, a fight was started... Jo looked up from the paper. Suddenly she ran out of the room and downstairs. Jo: Blair! When Blair sees Jo she throws up her fists. Blair: Alright, I’m ready for ya. Jo: No-look I found something. Read this. Blair takes the paper. After finished reading she looks up kind of confused. Blair: What’s this? Jo: Natalie was writing that. Blair: So? Jo (a little frustrated): Did you tell people that my looks could only get me a pity date? Blair: NO! Though we both know I’ve got great looks I would never say something like that- at least not to your face. (pauses) Wait- did you tell others that guys only want to go out with me to...you know... Jo: No way! Hey sometimes I don’t show it but I’ve got more respect for you than that. Who told you I said that? Jo and Blair: Natalie! Blair: So she started a fight? Why would she do that? Jo: That’s what I want to know. Suddenly Natalie comes in the door with some groceries but Jo and Blair don’t notice. Jo: I really don’t see why someone would want to start a fight. Natalie hears this and realizes what they are talking about. She puts the bag down and starts tiptoeing up the stairs. Blair: Natalie! Oh Natalie dear could you come hear for just a sec? Jo: Yes please do- I’d like to talk with you. Nat: Oh but I just need to get back to my homework. Blair: I’m sure you do. But considering we are the homework, perhaps you’d like to spend some time with us. Nat: So you found my work. Jo: Yes- could you please explain why you would want to start a fight? Nat: Well I had this assignment. Blair: What teacher tells students to go around starting fights? Nat: Well we were supposed to write about (she quickly slurs together) an imagined (talks regular again) fight. Blair: I’m sorry I think I missed those middle words there. Could you say them a little slower? Nat: It was supposed to be an imagined fight. But you guys usually are quibbling about something. I thought it might be more realistic if I wrote about you guys fighting. But when I found out you weren’t arguing over anything I decided to make something for you to quarrel over. I’m sorry. Blair: I understand. Well get rid of that paper, buy me a bottle that is the closest match of my -ahem- natural color and we’ll call things even. Nat (joking): And what color would that be Blair? Nat and Blair laugh. Jo: Well I hate to spoil this lovely moment but I’m not ready to say its all (puts up hand like she’s quoting) “fair and square”. I want some sort of revenge. Nat: Will this involve rearranging my face? Jo: Well I had a better idea... Suddenly we see Nat running out of the bathroom- she’s got green teeth AND bright orange hair. Jo and Blair, still in the bathroom, give each other a five. Mrs G comes in the door. The girls all come downstairs to greet her. She sees Jo’s green mouth, Blair’s orange hair, and Nat’s hair and teeth and is shocked. Mrs G: Are you girls auditioning for the circus? What happened while I was gone? Jo (so fast that no one can really understand her): Well Nat caused Blair and me to get into a fight and I colored Blair’s hair orange and she made my teeth green then we found out it was Nat’s doing that we were in a fight so we got revenge. Mrs G (sort of stunned by how fast Jo just said all of that): Well I couldn’t follow one bit of that- but I think this one I’ll just stay out of. Boy its good to be home. Everyone laughs. The End ------------------ Tootie: Can we sing? Jo: Sing? Tootie: That's what I do when I'm scared what do you do? Jo: Slap people Blair: A Warner is like a delicate soufle Jo: Yeah light and empty Nat: I'd rather be a happy magic marker than a skinny pencil Blair: (Cliff's parents) live on a farm. Tootie: A farm? Jo: As in e-i-e-i-o? Jo: Which one's the pig? Tootie: That's predictable Jo, insulting Blair. Jo: I wasn't insulting Blair, I All: was insulting the pig!

03-03-2001, 03:11 PM	#2
BlairW_1 Mindanao Machiku Senior Member Join Date: Dec 21, 2000 Location: Temporarily in Ok, permanent location ^ there! Posts: 1,011	This story is ATD! (Preppy talk for absolutely to die!) ------------------ "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." ~Danielle~ Go #33! Lady Bulldogs all da way! Basketball rulz!