Monday's Quotes: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 07-16-2007, 12:57 PM

“Ralph Kramden Inc.”:

Ralph: “How could you tell if you saw a yellow-bellied sap sucker when they are not supposed to be around here.”

Ed: “Because the bird that I saw had a yellow belly and it was sucking sap.”

“Young Man With A Horn”:

Alice: “All right Ralph. You haven’t touched this cornette (sp?) in years.”

Ralph: “I want to keep it.”

Ed: “He has a point Alice. He hasn’t seen his toes in years and he still wants to keep them.”

“Dial J For Janitor”:

Ralph: “Your garbage can was only half full. When it’s full-full, then I will take it down. That way, I will make one trip instead of two. Save a trip here – save a trip there and it all adds up.”

Ed: “That is what I am afraid of. It is mounting up all over the building.”

“Man In The Blue Suit”:

Alice: “Lucky suit? You haven’t worn the suit in five years.”

Ralph: “Do you know anybody who has been as unlucky as I have been in the last five years?”

Alice: “Yeah. Me.”

“Cottage For Sale Part 1”:

Ralph: “I am not asking you for the money. The general is telling you to give it to me.”

(Alice puts a bowl on Ralph’s head and “salutes” him.)

Alice: “Har-har-har!”

“Cottage For Sale Part 1”:

Trixie: “$989 for a summer cottage.”

Alice: “Don’t worry. It’s just another one of Ralph’s harebrained schemes.”

Ed: “Don’t give him all the credit. It was partly my idea too.”

"Ralph Kramden Presents":

Ralph: "Pardon me sir. On the Jackie Gleason Show, who's funnier, Jackie Gleason or Art Carney?"

Man: "I can't say. I watch Flipper."

"Ralph Kramden Presents":

(Ralph has every Raccoon believing that he knows Jackie Gleason and will get him to come to the Raccoon Dance.)

Ralph: "Do you remember the last time that the Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler bought everybody a round of beer?"

Alice: "Yeah, the time that you told them that you knew Rudy Valee."

"Rafitti, Brooklyn Style":

Ralph: "For once you are right. Alice should have married Johnny Farell. He's a much smarter guy than I am."

Alice's Mom: "So you admit it."

Ralph: "Sure. He took one look at you and refused to marry her."

07-16-2007, 12:57 PM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,069	Monday's Quotes: “Ralph Kramden Inc.”: Ralph: “How could you tell if you saw a yellow-bellied sap sucker when they are not supposed to be around here.” Ed: “Because the bird that I saw had a yellow belly and it was sucking sap.” “Young Man With A Horn”: Alice: “All right Ralph. You haven’t touched this cornette (sp?) in years.” Ralph: “I want to keep it.” Ed: “He has a point Alice. He hasn’t seen his toes in years and he still wants to keep them.” “Dial J For Janitor”: Ralph: “Your garbage can was only half full. When it’s full-full, then I will take it down. That way, I will make one trip instead of two. Save a trip here – save a trip there and it all adds up.” Ed: “That is what I am afraid of. It is mounting up all over the building.” “Man In The Blue Suit”: Alice: “Lucky suit? You haven’t worn the suit in five years.” Ralph: “Do you know anybody who has been as unlucky as I have been in the last five years?” Alice: “Yeah. Me.” “Cottage For Sale Part 1”: Ralph: “I am not asking you for the money. The general is telling you to give it to me.” (Alice puts a bowl on Ralph’s head and “salutes” him.) Alice: “Har-har-har!” “Cottage For Sale Part 1”: Trixie: “$989 for a summer cottage.” Alice: “Don’t worry. It’s just another one of Ralph’s harebrained schemes.” Ed: “Don’t give him all the credit. It was partly my idea too.” "Ralph Kramden Presents": Ralph: "Pardon me sir. On the Jackie Gleason Show, who's funnier, Jackie Gleason or Art Carney?" Man: "I can't say. I watch Flipper." "Ralph Kramden Presents": (Ralph has every Raccoon believing that he knows Jackie Gleason and will get him to come to the Raccoon Dance.) Ralph: "Do you remember the last time that the Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler bought everybody a round of beer?" Alice: "Yeah, the time that you told them that you knew Rudy Valee." "Rafitti, Brooklyn Style": Ralph: "For once you are right. Alice should have married Johnny Farell. He's a much smarter guy than I am." Alice's Mom: "So you admit it." Ralph: "Sure. He took one look at you and refused to marry her."