Sunday's Quotes, Honeymooners TV Schedule & a Honeymooners July 4th:

[Frank Gannucci]

(The Movie Channel [aka The Movie Channel East], The Movie Channel X & Showtime Family.)

The movie is 90 minutes long.

TV-PG

All times are Eastern. The movie is on the Pacific version of the Movie Channel as well. Just add three hours to the times I posted.

Ralph & Norton hatch a get-rich-quick scheme to get them out of Brooklyn and onto easy street. Standing by their husbands are devoted wives Alice and Trixie, who help their guys make ends meet by being waitresses at a neighborhood diner.

Mike Epps as Ed Norton. Regina Hall as Trixie Norton. Cedric the Entertainer as Ralph Kramden. Gabrielle Union as Alice Kramden.

Channel Day Time VCR Plus Code:
TMC Wed. Jul 4 2:30 PM 238162
TMC-X Sat. Jul 7 10:00 AM 43007
TMC-X Sat. Jul 7 10:35 PM 6194552
ShowF Sun. Jul 8 10:35 AM 9425779
ShowF Sun. Jul 8 9:00 PM 6972
TMC-X Tue. Jul 10 8:00 AM 54557
TMC-X Tue. Jul 10 7:35 PM 4224010
TMC-X Fri. Jul 13 7:45 AM 9317831
TMC-X Fri. Jul 13 9:00 PM 6856

(AmericanLife TV):

TV-G

All times are Eastern.

Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie Norton.

The first VCR Plus Code is for the first showing. the second one is for the second showing.

Sat. July 7 2007 7p & 11p #29 – “Boy Next Door”: Alice, planning a surprise birthday party for Ralph, borrows a cookbook recipe from Trixie. Ralph, discovering the cookbook, finds in it an old love letter written by Ed. He concludes that Ed and Alice are lovers and takes the appropriate actions: following them and telling Trixie. But Trixie just laughs at Ralph, and then she tells him the truth. (VCR Plus Codes: 4479/12011.)

Sat. July 7 8p & Sun. July 8, 2007 7p #30 – “Follow The Boys”: When the wives complain that their husbands don't fuss over them anymore, Ralph and Ed come up with a compromise: one night a week will be "boys' night out," the other nights they will spend with Alice and Trixie. But this is just another scheme that backfires on Ralph, who is planning to wear out the wives on the first night, but overcomes himself with exhaustion instead. (VCR Plus Codes: 3127/5333.)

Sat. July 14 7p & 11p #38 – “Play It Again Norton”: The Honeymooners wreck havoc on a cross-country tour. Our two willing but not-so-able boobs (Ralph & Ed) enter a song contest sponsored by movie star Washington Kenmore (played by Paul Lynde). The prize: $25,000 and a Hollywood trip. The problem: entrants must be under 18. (VCR Plus Codes: 9397/72769.)

Sat. July 14 8p & Sun. July 15, 2007 7p #39 – “Ralph Goes Hollywood”: Bing Crosby, Maureen O'Hara and Bert Parks are the guests as the Honeymooners head for Hollywood to claim their songwriting prize. High jinks include a stay at Maureen's mansion, expense-account living and Ralph's plan to throw a party for Bing. (The role of the "reporter" is played by George Petrie.) (VCR Plus Codes: 1945/7917.)

(ABC)

All times are Eastern.

Wed. July 4 & Wed. July 11, 2007. "Next Best Thing: Who Is The
Greatest Celebrity Impersonator?": The July 4th episode: First episode with auditions in New York. The July 11th episode: Description not available.

In each episode, a panel of popular well-known judges -- comedians Jeffrey Ross (Comedy Central Roasts, The Aristocrats), Lisa Ann Walter (The Parent Trap, Shall We Dance?) and Elon Gold (Stacked, Cheaper by the Dozen) -- will use their razor sharp wit and comedic skills as they evaluate, critique and sometimes skewer celebrity mpersonators (two of the people will be impersonating JACKIE GLEASON AND ART CARNEY) based on how much they look, sound and act like the celebrity they're impersonating. The judges will determine who will go on to compete in the next round of auditions, while America will vote for the final winning impersonator through a viewer voting system. The winner will receive a grand prize of $100,000. Michele Merkin (Foody Call, Extreme Dodgeball) hosts the show which will audition thousands of people in Los Angeles, New York City, Las Vegas and Orlando. Contestants impersonate, among others, Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Aniston, Johnny Depp, James Bond, Dolly Parton, Superman, George W. Bush, Neil Diamond, David Letterman and Tony Soprano. Thirty semi-finalists will perform their routines in front of the judges and a live studio audience. The ten finalists chosen by the judges will do one final performance for viewers at home, whose vote will then determine the winner and confer the $100,000 prize and the title of "The Next Best Thing" (VCR Plus for the July 4th episode on ABC: 83704. For ABC HD: 4075.) VCR Plus for the July 11 episode on ABC: 98072. For ABC HD: 8237.)

"Dinner Guest":

(Freddie Muller, Ralph's boss, is visiting along with his wife.)

Ralph (to Alice): "Why did you have to tell that joke? I must have a million better jokes. I don't even know where I got that joke."

Freddie Muller: "I told you that joke the other day."

"Norton Moves In":

Ed (coming in with a folding cot): "Hello folks! I hope we didn't disturb your sleep."

Ralph: "No, you didn't disturb my sleep. I always get up at 3am. That way, I can get a seat on the subway on the way to work."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Ralph: "Norton, how could I lose a couple of inches in height in a few hours?"

Ed: "Maybe all that food you ate made you shorter in height."

"Mama Loves Mambo":

Ralph (to Carlos): "It's easy for you to play Sir Galahad, you don't work. When you go to work, you dance. That's not work. When we (Ralph and Ed) work, we work. Diry work. Look at your hands and my friend's hands."

Ed: "It isn't fair to compare my hands to his. I got mine in water all day."

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

(Ralph is trying to break his friendship with Ed just so he [Ralph] would be more calm.)

Ralph: "Can you take a hint?"

Ed: "Yes."

Ralph: "All right." (yells): "I HATE YOU! HATE YOU! HATE YOU! HATE YOU! NOW GET OUT."

Ed: "Okay, what's the hint?"

"People's Choice" (Color version):

Ralph: "What am I supposed to say?"

Policeman: "'Knuckles, it's you.'"

(The policeman hides out in the bedroom.)

(Knuckles enters through the front door. Ralph greets him.)

Ralph: "Na na na na. Na na na na."

(Ed comes in.)

Ed: "Knuckles, it's you."

"Mama Loves Mambo":

Alice: "You seem to have forgotten that I am a woman."

Ralph: "I forgot that you are a woman? How could I? You are always yappin'."

"Unconventional Behavior":

Ed: "Ralph?"

Ralph: "What?"

Ed: "Mind if I smoke?"

Ralph: "I don't care if you burn."

"Sleepy Time Gal":

(Alice is in the phone booth but the boys don't know that it is her in there.)

Ed: "I got a plan to get her out of this booth. Across the street, there's a barber shop and in there there's a phone booth. We go in there, call here and tell this woman to come home immediately. It's urgent. She leaves. We come in here to call up the hypnotist."

Ralph: "Did you just say to go across the street, call here, tell this lady to come home and then come back here to use this phone?" (yells): "I NEVER HEARD ANYTHING MORE STUPID IN MY LIFE. THIS PHONE WOULD BE BUSY IF WE DID THAT."

Now on for my skit.

(The Kramdens and Nortons go to the East River to see the fireworks. They have a barbeque grill with them. Ralph, of course, has the wives and Ed carry the grill.)

Alice: “Ralph, why couldn’t you help carry the grill?"

Ralph: "Because I have a cold."

Ed: "You sure don't sound like it."

Ralph: "Shut up Norton. Now, we set it right here. Now, I am going to cook hamburgers, hot dogs and steak."

Ed: "And what are you going to serve us?"

Ralph: "Norton, you are lucky that I don't throw you into the East River now. Now, you have to admit, this is a perfect place for a barbeque. We can watch the fireworks right here. I feel sorry for the people who watch them on TV."

Ed: "You don't even have a TV. So you have no choice."

Ralph: "We don't have a TV because I am waiting for 3D TV."

Alice: "I guess we will never get a TV set."

Ralph: "Oooh, you are a riot Alice."

(Ralph cooks up some food and serves everyone.)

Ralph: "Well, I cook a mean burger. Isn't that right Ed?"

Ed: "It sure is Ralph. I got to hand it you. This is perfect. We are standing right next to the heavily-polluted East River which flows right into my place of work. All the garbage and evrything..."

Ralph (yells): "NORTON, I AM TRYING TO EAT HERE."

Ed: "Sorry Ralph."

(The fireworks light up the sky. Ralph is still cooking.)

Ed: "Look at those fireworks Ralph."

(Ed accidentally knocks down the barbeque grill. The hot grill falls onto Ralph's hand.)

Ralph (yells): "OWWWWWWWWWWWWW! YOU IDIOT!"

(Ralph walks around and accidentally falls into the East River.)

Ralph (yells): "COME HERE NORTON! I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I AM GOING TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING YOU LIKE. DIRTY WATER."

(Ralph chases after Ed. The girls chase after the husbands.)

(Jackie Gleason walks out on stage.)

Jackie: "As usual, the Miami Beach audiences are the BEST. Good night."

(Audience applauds.)

Credit goes to Yahoo! Groups You're A Riot, movietome.com, imdb.com, honeymooners.net & TVGuide.com.

[powbangzooom]

Frank Thanks for all the listings and great quotes. I mean no disrespect in any way, because I am very grateful that you take the time to do this for everyone. If so, may the ceiling fall in on me……Am I the only one who takes this as an insult to The Honeymooners when the movie is categorized on the same page as the show? Sorry Frank, that movie just always steams me.
Respectfully yours,
Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera