Monday's Quotes:

[Frank Gannucci]

"Principle of The Thing":

(Ralph & Ed are about to redecorate the apartment.)

Alice: "If you ask me, this wall shouldn't be papered. It should be padded."

(She leaves.)

Ralph: "Ooh, just once. Bang!"

"In 25 Words Or Less":

(The waiter makes crepe zuzzets [Franch pancakes], he starts a fire on his grill. Ralph sees it and puts the fire out with a fire extinguisher.)

Ralph: "It's a good thing I was here or the whole boat would have been on fire."

Alice: "Ralph, those were French pancakes."

Ralph: "I don't care what started the fire."

"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":

(Ed comes in wearing shorts.)

Ed: "It's the latest thing. It's about time that we men broke the chains of convention. We have been prisoners long enough."

Ralph: "You keep wearing that and you will be in prison all over again."

"Songwriters":

Ralph: "If you can play music, you can play any type of music."

Ed: "Oh yeah? Name me one Rhumba that Beethoven wrote."

"Follow The Boys":

Ed (reading a crossword puzzle): "'Four-letter word for place of dwelling.' House. H-o-s-e. That's the trouble with these things. They are not a challenge."

Alice: "Yeah, they are easy. Easy: E-z-y."

"Follow The Boys":

Ralph: "The Hurricanes need me. I'm the anchorman."

Alice: "Of what, the Queen Mary?"

"Funny Money":

Ralph: "Do you know how embarrassing it is to be thrown out of the Raccoon Lodge?"

Alice: "Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing just being in it."

"House Beautiful" (aka "Pardon My Glove"):

Alice: "I better make that vanilla cake. Ralph loves chocolate, but I gave him a belt and I want to make sure it fits."

Trixie: "If it doens't, you can always exchange it for a bigger size."

Alice: "There is no bigger size."

"Mama Loves Mambo":

Alice: "You seem to have forgotten that I am a woman."

Ralph: "I forgot that you are a woman? How could I? You are always yappin'."