OMG!! I just read this!!

[Frischman_Fan]

Taken from imdb.com

"According to a quote from Lucille Ball in Boze Hadleigh's "Hollywood Babble-On", Ober physically abused Vivian Vance, and one time when Vance came to the set with a "shiner", Ball told her that if she [Vance] wouldn't divorce [Ober], then she [Ball] would."

That's terrible!! And to think Vance was married to him for like 18 years. How much abuse could she have taken? Poor thing!

[Ireneparalegal]

There are lots of women and men who deal with domestic violence. I had read abt Vivian being abused by her husband. One reason she was in therapy for years. I was in a similar situation for almost 16 years. You'd be surprised at how many people endure that abuse. Mostly out of fear they stay. Many stay for financial reasons. Some stay because of religious reasons. Vivian was feeling insecure and her self-esteem was shattered.

You'd be surprised at how many beautiful, intelligient, educated, talented women stay in abusive relationships. Look at Halle Berry. She is considered the world's most beautiful woman and yet, she has had two terrible marriages, the first to Derek Jeter who abused her. She also had a boyfriend, someone famous, whom she won't name, who broke her eardrum during a domestic fight.

[Madame X]

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

There are lots of women and men who deal with domestic violence. I had read abt Vivian being abused by her husband. One reason she was in therapy for years. I was in a similar situation for almost 16 years. You'd be surprised at how many people endure that abuse. Mostly out of fear they stay. Many stay for financial reasons. Some stay because of religious reasons. Vivian was feeling insecure and her self-esteem was shattered.

You'd be surprised at how many beautiful, intelligient, educated, talented women stay in abusive relationships. Look at Halle Berry. She is considered the world's most beautiful woman and yet, she has had two terrible marriages, the first to Derek Jeter who abused her. She also had a boyfriend, someone famous, whom she won't name, who broke her eardrum during a domestic fight.

Abusers are cowards. They take it out on someone because they can. They should put their own heads through a wall and do us all a favor. If people like Vivian Vance, Halle Berry, Tina Turner or Heather Locklear aren't good enough, what hope is there for the rest of us? Thank God you mustered up the courage to get out, Irene!

[Ireneparalegal]

Originally Posted by Madame X

Abusers are cowards. They take it out on someone because they can. They should put their own heads through a wall and do us all a favor. If people like Vivian Vance, Halle Berry, Tina Turner or Heather Locklear aren't good enough, what hope is there for the rest of us? Thank God you mustered up the courage to get out, Irene!

Thank you sweetie. Courage and knowing that my daughters deserved peace in their lives is what it took...finally.

I know what you mean, you see all these gifted, beautiful ladies with good heads on their shoulders and you wonder, what is wrong with them? Nothing, not a damn thing. The abuser is the one with the problem and yet, the abuser can make you feel so low and so pathetic. All the power, all the prestige, all the awards, all the

I am sure Vivian had it much worse to deal with simply because of the era she grew up in and the fact that Hollywood can be cruel when "bad" things came to light upon a celebrity. I am sure to this day, Vivian's so called dependency on therapy was simply her way of reminding herself that she was someone, someone special and if that is what kept her from going bonkers, than more power to her.

[Zoneboy]

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

Look at Halle Berry. She is considered the world's most beautiful woman and yet, she has had two terrible marriages, the first to Derek Jeter who abused her.

Halle Berry was married to David Justice not Derek Jeter and the abuse was only alleged. It's also rumoured that Wesley Snipes was the secret boyfriend but nothing has been found to substantiate this.

Halle Berry’s Divorce Files:

According to reports, Oscar winner Halle Berry filed for divorce in Los Angeles Superior Court Monday from her estranged husband. Berry and her husband singer Eric Benet separated back in October after less than three years of marriage. Berry then said in a statement, "Eric and I have had marital problems for some time now and have tried to work things out together." She also said that they needed to "reevaluate their union." Apparently, their time apart was not enough to save the marriage. They split up amid rumors of Benet’s infidelity. The rumors that he was cheating on Berry began shortly after their January 2001 nuptials.

Three months after their wedding, Berry and Benet filed a lawsuit against Star magazine for reporting that their marriage was "on the rocks." A little over a year later there was talk that Benet had cheated on his bride, a rumor that was neither denied nor confirmed by Berry. Rumors of infidelity followed the couple throughout their short-lived marriage. These rumors may have led them to divorce court. Sources say the divorce proceedings were going "smoothly" and "amicably."

Despite being one of the most beautiful women in Hollywood, Berry remains unlucky in love. Her first marriage to baseball star David Justice ended badly in 1996 with hints of alleged physical abuse. During the divorce proceedings, Berry requested a restraining order, saying that Justice was harassing her. Early on in her career she had a romance with a fellow actor whom she refuses to name, who beat her so severely she lost most of the hearing in her right ear. For all those girls who think that fame, money, and beauty will bring you happiness…here is just another example that life isn’t always what it seems.

[Ireneparalegal]

I made an error. I get those two baseball players mixed up.

I seen first hand the divorce papers of Halle Berry. Actually, the copies. There is more in that file that was never revealed publicly.

It is alleged but I BELIEVE HALLE BERRY when she says she was abused. Having seen her divorce files (what you posted above is from an article).
No reason for her to make up such an allegation. What would she gain by lying abt that? Nothing. She spoke abt it in the hopes that others in her situation can get out of those situations and also because she wanted others to know that it isn't only a problem you find in the poor sections of America. It happens to celebrities too.

As for Wesley Snipes, I too believe he is the one behind her damaged eardrum. Halle Berry's ex boyfriend stated this in an article. He was afraid that people would think it was him who did that to Halle, so he decided to say it was Wesley.

[Zoneboy]

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

I made an error. I get those two baseball players mixed up.

I seen first hand the divorce papers of Halle Berry. Actually, the copies. There is more in that file that was never revealed publicly.

It is alleged but I BELIEVE HALLE BERRY when she says she was abused. Having seen her divorce files (what you posted above is from an article).
No reason for her to make up such an allegation. What would she gain by lying abt that? Nothing. She spoke abt it in the hopes that others in her situation can get out of those situations and also because she wanted others to know that it isn't only a problem you find in the poor sections of America. It happens to celebrities too.

As for Wesley Snipes, I too believe he is the one behind her damaged eardrum. Halle Berry's ex boyfriend stated this in an article. He was afraid that people would think it was him who did that to Halle, so he decided to say it was Wesley.

I can see where one might confuse the 2, I also have no reason to doubt her about the abuse and she doesn't seem like the type that would make false claims then again I never thought David Justice would be the type to abuse her but that just goes to show that no matter how well you think you may know someone, You really don't know them at all. If you don't mind my asking, Where did you see the actual files?

[Frischman_Fan]

I heard Vivian was in therapy because of her childhood also. Does she talk about it in her book?

[Madame X]

Originally Posted by Zoneboy

Halle Berry was married to David Justice not Derek Jeter and the abuse was only alleged. It's also rumoured that Wesley Snipes was the secret boyfriend but nothing has been found to substantiate this.

Okay. We don't mean to slander Derek Jeter. I am sure what we talk about on this website won't go to press and initiate a lawsuit. I think the point is that good people-especially women-are living through a lot of undeserved crap.

Vivian Vance was obviously a beautiful, talented human being and did not deserve whatever her husband/father/whomever dished out. The stigmas of the fifties made psychos out of a lot of people. Just look at all the gay actors who had to act in real life as well as on screen. No one could admit or talk about anything that tarnished their portfolio. My goodness, they even had to change their names to disguise their ethnicity or religion.

My favorite show is "I Love Ethel."

[Zoneboy]

Originally Posted by Madame X

Okay. We don't mean to slander Derek Jeter. I am sure what we talk about on this website won't go to press and initiate a lawsuit.

Who is this "we" you speak of? It wasn't you that mentioned Jeter and Irene has already acknowleged her error. As far as I'm concerned that part of the thread is history and hasn't got a thing to do with you.

[catlover79]

I actually did meet David Justice when he and his then-girlfriend went to see The Sixth Sense at the theater I was working at in 1999. While he did sign an autograph for me (which I still have in an album), you could definitely tell he had a big ego. Of course, that doesn't mean he's an abuser. He struck me as very cocky.

Back to VV, her situation was sadly common in those days. People didn't talk openly about things like spousal abuse back in the 1950s. I'm just happy that Viv got out of the marriage and later on met a man who truly loved her. I read she and her last husband were blissfully happy together, and remained so until she passed on.

[Madame X]

Originally Posted by Zoneboy

Who is this "we" you speak of? It wasn't you that mentioned Jeter and Irene has already acknowleged her error. As far as I'm concerned that part of the thread is history and hasn't got a thing to do with you.

Thanks for pointing that out. I guess I was just continuing on what was said before. In the future I will make sure to use a quote and be more accurate with my replies.

[Frischman_Fan]

Originally Posted by catlover79

Back to VV, her situation was sadly common in those days. People didn't talk openly about things like spousal abuse back in the 1950s. I'm just happy that Viv got out of the marriage and later on met a man who truly loved her. I read she and her last husband were blissfully happy together, and remained so until she passed on.

Yes. I'm glad Viv found a good man.

[Ireneparalegal]

Originally Posted by Zoneboy

I can see where one might confuse the 2, I also have no reason to doubt her about the abuse and she doesn't seem like the type that would make false claims then again I never thought David Justice would be the type to abuse her but that just goes to show that no matter how well you think you may know someone, You really don't know them at all. If you don't mind my asking, Where did you see the actual files?

I saw copies of the files. I did work for someone and had to take these particular documents to an attorneys office. This particular attorney practices in Los Angeles and had access to this file as well as many other celebrity files for certain reasons.

[Ireneparalegal]

Originally Posted by Madame X

Okay. We don't mean to slander Derek Jeter. I am sure what we talk about on this website won't go to press and initiate a lawsuit. I think the point is that good people-especially women-are living through a lot of undeserved crap.

Vivian Vance was obviously a beautiful, talented human being and did not deserve whatever her husband/father/whomever dished out. The stigmas of the fifties made psychos out of a lot of people. Just look at all the gay actors who had to act in real life as well as on screen. No one could admit or talk about anything that tarnished their portfolio. My goodness, they even had to change their names to disguise their ethnicity or religion.

My favorite show is "I Love Ethel."

No we didn't mean to slander Derek. He is a cutie pie. I get your sense of humor and to me, that is all that matters Madame X.

I didn't want this beautiful thread abt Vivian to turn into a Halle Berry thread. I used Halle as an example because many were shocked to hear that such a thing could occur to such a fabulous lady. Vivian was a great lady, SHE IS ETHEL NOW AND ALWAYS. When I first read abt what Vivian went through I too was shocked. However, I was a teen when I read abt her personal life, I had yet to know the drama of a marriage filled with domestic violence.

You are so right abt the stigma that she surely must have worried abt. Heaven forbid.