St. Patty's Day Quotes & Honeymooners TV Schedule (3/19-4/1):

[Frank Gannucci]

(AmericanLife TV):

TV-G

All episodes are one hour long.

All times are Eastern.

The first VCR Plus Code is for the first showing. The second is for the second showing.)

Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie Norton.

Sat. Mar. 24, 2007 7p & 11p #1 - "In Twenty-Five Words or Less": Ralph wins the Flakey Wakey trip to Europe for four by entering a slogan contest. (VCR Plus Codes: 2095/87989.)

Sat. Mar. 24 8p & Sun. Mar. 25, 2007 7p #2 - "Ship of Fools": The Kramdens and Nortons sail to Europe. Ralph and Ed set themselves adrift on a life boat but are rescued some time later. Upon arriving in Paris, Ralph poses for a publicity photo and falls off the deck. (VCR Plus Codes: 8415/3361.)

Sat. Mar. 31, 2007 7p & 11p #3 - "The Poor People of Paris": Ralph & Ed get a great exchange rate -- on counterfeit money. (VCR Plus Codes: 8883/NA.)

Sat. Mar. 31 8p & Sun. Apr. 1, 2007 7p #4 - "Confusion Italian Style": Ralph is jealous of Alice's guide, not knowing the guide is a little boy. (VCR Plus Codes: 6493/NA.)

(Showtime [aka Showtime East], Showtime HD [aka Showtime HD East], Showtime Too & Showtime Family Zone.)

Rated: PG.

Mike Epps as Ed Norton. Regina Hall as Trixie Norton. Cedric the Entertainer as Ralph Kramden. Gabrielle Union as Alice Kramden.

Ralph & Norton hatch a get-rich-quick scheme to get them out of Brooklyn and onto easy street. Standing by their husbands are devoted wives Alice and Trixie, who help their guys make ends meet by being waitresses at a neighborhood diner.

The movie is 90 minutes long.

Day Time Channel VCR Plus Code
Monday Mar. 19, 2007 1p Showtime Too 7137884
Monday Mar. 19, 2007 9:30p Showtime Too 1242528
Wednesday Mar. 21, 2007 11p Showtime 559841
Wednesday Mar. 21, 2007 11p Showtime HD East 56976
Thursday, Mar. 22, 2007 10a Showtime Family Zone 52975
Thursday, Mar. 22, 2007 8:35p Showtime Family Zone 5863377
Friday, Mar. 23, 2007 6:30p Showtime Too 6042897
Sunday, Mar. 25, 2007 6:00a Showtime 147309
Sunday, Mar. 25, 2007 6:00a Showtime HD East 688458
Sunday, Mar. 25, 2007 4:45p Showtime 3178187
Sunday, Mar. 25, 2007 4:45p Showtime HD East 8837670
Friday, Mar. 30, 2007 11:30a Showtime Family Zone 331818
Friday, Mar. 30, 2007 8:45p Showtime Family Zone 5587905
Saturday, Mar. 31, 2007 7:45a Showtime Too 63798696

For Pacific times, just add three hours to the times I just posted.

"Man In The Blue Suit":

Alice: "Why do you want the suit back?"

Ralph: "I'll tell you why. It's my lucky suit."

Alice: "Lucky suit? You haven't worn it in five years."

Ralph: "Do you know how lucky I have been for the last five years?"

"The $99,000 Answer":

Ralph: "This time, I am going to get my pot of gold."

Alice: "Just go for the gold. You already got the pot."

"Ralph Kramden Inc.":

Ralph: "I am not nervous, Alice. I am not nervous. I may be a little excited about inheriting $40,000,000, but I am not nervous."

(Ralph polishes his sock.)

Alice: "You are not nervous Ralph. You are not nervous at all. You just read in Esquire about how the well-dressed man always polishes his sock."

"Quiz Show":

Alice: "Boy, that brother of yours is the stupidest person I have ever seen."

Ralph: "How could you look at me and say that?"

"Quiz Show":

Ralph: "I had four years of schooling."

Alice: "And I had eight years."

Ralph: "Well, some people learn faster than others."

"Better Living Through TV":

(Ed has Trixie's dress on while Trixie has to measure the hems.)

Trixie: "Do you have to smoke that cigar?"

Ed: "Please, it's the only link left to the old me."

All quotes come from "Curse of The Kramdens":

#1

Mayor: "Did your mitther come from Ireland?"

Ed: "What's a mitther?"

Ralph: "He means your mother."

Ed: "No, she didn't. Neither did my britther or my sitther. It was my grandfither."

#2

Mayor: "Ah, you are a Kramden all right. You got the ear of an eagle, the heart of a lion and the dignity of a king. Ralph Kramden, it's good to meet you."

(He shakes the hand of Ed.)

Ralph: "Wait a minute. I am the one with the ear of an eagle, the heart of a lion and the dignity of a king. Ralph Kramden, it's good to meet you."

Ed: "Yeah, I got the tooth of an elk."

#3

(The mayor compliments the husbands on their chocie of wives.)

Alice: "You have been kissing the blimmey stone."

Ed: "If he said those compliments about Trixie, I would say he drank he whole thing."

Credit goes to Yahoo! Groups You're A Riot, honeymooners.net & tvguide.com.

Happy St. Patty's Day!