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80s_Fan · 01-22-2007, 12:13 PM

I have this problem with my father (it's embarrassing) but I need to talk about it and if anybody has the same problem and/or has advice for me; please share it with me as soon as possible. Thank You In Advance!!

To make a long story short; my father never washes himself and he sweats a lot. The last time he washed himself; I believe it was when there was the funeral service for my mom in January 2005 so it has been about 2 yrs. now.
I'm at the point where I avoid going near him if I can help it and my boyfriend has talked to me about it and he can't understand why he's like that.

Can anybody relate to me and/or has some advice? Thanks Again!!

Courtnee · 01-22-2007, 12:31 PM

He hasn't taken a bath in two years? Dang.

I would just tell him he reeks, but in a nice way.

Georgia's on my Mind · 01-22-2007, 12:50 PM

is his birthday coming up? how about a basket of nice fancy soaps and lotions...

80s_Fan · 01-22-2007, 12:50 PM

I forgot to mention that he does wash his clothing (underwear, socks, etc..)
but not his coats and he's always wearing the same thing more or less.
He has lots of clothing that he's never worn; I'm really embarrassed.

Georgia's on my Mind · 01-22-2007, 12:54 PM

take him on 10 years younger, or what not to wear

Courtnee · 01-22-2007, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 80s_Fan

I forgot to mention that he does wash his clothing (underwear, socks, etc..)
but not his coats and he's always wearing the same thing more or less.
He has lots of clothing that he's never worn; I'm really embarrassed.

Seriously, Just tell him because it appears that he doesn't even realize that he smells badly.

80s_Fan · 01-22-2007, 03:50 PM

I'm afraid to tell him because I don't want to hurt his feelings and/or get him mad; he has a bad temper with certain issues. I think that he just doesn't care anymore; because he's getting older. My late mother had told me that he has been like that since he got out of the armed forces (which is over 30 yrs. ago); not sure exactly when.

It bothers me that he's like that because I love him very much and want to be near him at times and/or give him a hug but I can't stand to be near him with his problem. Even when we give each other a kiss (peck) for a certain holiday; I wipe my mouth right away after but without him knowing about it.

I don't know what to do; I am so

AB · 01-22-2007, 04:27 PM

I worked with a lady who smelled really bad, I tried bringing up the subject
several times in round about ways but it didn't work. I finally gave up and
put an air-freshner at my work station. I mean its hard to tell someone they
stink.

80s_Fan · 01-22-2007, 04:57 PM

I work at "Zellers" and have some co-workers with the same problem.
When I get near them; I hold my breath until I pass them by and I do the same thing with my father; but it hurts me to do that with him because he's my dad and I love him very much. I am so

about what to do.

80s_Fan · 01-22-2007, 06:14 PM

to all those who responded with advice. I emailed my sister and she suggests that I talk to him in private. I will talk to my boyfriend first to get his feedback and then I will try to discuss the situation with my dad.

Kazza · 01-22-2007, 07:46 PM

Have you thought about him being depressed and not taking care of himself is an underlying issue to a more serious condition?

Michael [hXc] · 01-22-2007, 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 80s_Fan

I work at "Zellers" and have some co-workers with the same problem.
When I get near them; I hold my breath until I pass them by and I do the same thing with my father; but it hurts me to do that with him because he's my dad and I love him very much. I am so

about what to do.

I know someone with the last name Zellers. well it may actually be Zellars, but its basically the same.

Your father has to know that he smells bad, and it may be hurtful/offensive if you point it out to him. However, he needs to hear it again. If he refuses to shower or clean up, he needs to know that he is harming both himself and those around him, who have to smell him. So you should tell him because you care about him.

Janice · 01-22-2007, 11:28 PM

It sounds like clinical depression to me. Letting your hygiene go is a symptom. When you talk with him, ask if he'll agree to a physical. If he has a primary care physician, perhaps you can call him or her to let them know what's going on.

Two years without a shower or bath is not normal. I could be wrong, but it sounds unhealthy too...bacteria or something along those lines.

Good luck in your talk with him.

SBTB Geek · 01-23-2007, 01:09 AM

^Great post.

MakeMeLaugh · 01-23-2007, 04:36 PM

that is the weirdest thing I have ever heard of! he NEEDS to shower! I would just tell him. I know that I would not be embarrassed to tell my dad. 2 years is just wrong. good luck with that.

01-22-2007, 12:13 PM	#1
80s_Fan Healthcare_Clerk Senior Member Join Date: May 26, 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 1,697	Body Odor I have this problem with my father (it's embarrassing) but I need to talk about it and if anybody has the same problem and/or has advice for me; please share it with me as soon as possible. Thank You In Advance!! To make a long story short; my father never washes himself and he sweats a lot. The last time he washed himself; I believe it was when there was the funeral service for my mom in January 2005 so it has been about 2 yrs. now. I'm at the point where I avoid going near him if I can help it and my boyfriend has talked to me about it and he can't understand why he's like that. Can anybody relate to me and/or has some advice? Thanks Again!!

01-22-2007, 12:31 PM	#2
Courtnee MAN VS SAMMICH. Forum Star Join Date: Mar 23, 2005 Location: Louisiana Posts: 16,413	He hasn't taken a bath in two years? Dang. I would just tell him he reeks, but in a nice way.
	__________________ Whether I'm the rose of sheer perfection A freckle on the nose of life's complexion The Cinderella or the shine apple of its eye I gotta fly once, I gotta try once, Only can die once, right, sir? Ooh, life is juicy, juicy and you see, I gotta have my bite, sir. Get ready for me love, 'cause I'm a "comer" I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade

01-22-2007, 12:50 PM	#4
80s_Fan Healthcare_Clerk Senior Member Join Date: May 26, 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 1,697	Forgot To Mention.... I forgot to mention that he does wash his clothing (underwear, socks, etc..) but not his coats and he's always wearing the same thing more or less. He has lots of clothing that he's never worn; I'm really embarrassed.

01-22-2007, 03:50 PM	#7
80s_Fan Healthcare_Clerk Senior Member Join Date: May 26, 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 1,697	I'm Afraid To I'm afraid to tell him because I don't want to hurt his feelings and/or get him mad; he has a bad temper with certain issues. I think that he just doesn't care anymore; because he's getting older. My late mother had told me that he has been like that since he got out of the armed forces (which is over 30 yrs. ago); not sure exactly when. It bothers me that he's like that because I love him very much and want to be near him at times and/or give him a hug but I can't stand to be near him with his problem. Even when we give each other a kiss (peck) for a certain holiday; I wipe my mouth right away after but without him knowing about it. I don't know what to do; I am so

01-22-2007, 04:57 PM	#9
80s_Fan Healthcare_Clerk Senior Member Join Date: May 26, 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 1,697	Co-Workers Have The Same Problem I work at "Zellers" and have some co-workers with the same problem. When I get near them; I hold my breath until I pass them by and I do the same thing with my father; but it hurts me to do that with him because he's my dad and I love him very much. I am so about what to do.

01-22-2007, 12:50 PM	#3
Georgia's on my Mind Senior Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Aug 19, 2001 Posts: 25,054	is his birthday coming up? how about a basket of nice fancy soaps and lotions...

01-22-2007, 12:54 PM	#5
Georgia's on my Mind Senior Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Aug 19, 2001 Posts: 25,054	take him on 10 years younger, or what not to wear

01-22-2007, 04:27 PM	#8
AB Member Eternal Member Forum Icon Join Date: Dec 26, 2006 Location: The South Posts: 59,428	I worked with a lady who smelled really bad, I tried bringing up the subject several times in round about ways but it didn't work. I finally gave up and put an air-freshner at my work station. I mean its hard to tell someone they stink.

01-22-2007, 06:14 PM	#10
80s_Fan Healthcare_Clerk Senior Member Join Date: May 26, 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 1,697	Thank You Everybody!! to all those who responded with advice. I emailed my sister and she suggests that I talk to him in private. I will talk to my boyfriend first to get his feedback and then I will try to discuss the situation with my dad.

01-22-2007, 07:46 PM	#11
Kazza Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 17, 2003 Posts: 3,244	Have you thought about him being depressed and not taking care of himself is an underlying issue to a more serious condition?

01-22-2007, 11:28 PM	#13
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	It sounds like clinical depression to me. Letting your hygiene go is a symptom. When you talk with him, ask if he'll agree to a physical. If he has a primary care physician, perhaps you can call him or her to let them know what's going on. Two years without a shower or bath is not normal. I could be wrong, but it sounds unhealthy too...bacteria or something along those lines. Good luck in your talk with him.

01-23-2007, 01:09 AM	#14
SBTB Geek Smooth Moderator Forum Veteran Join Date: Feb 21, 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,004	^Great post.

01-23-2007, 04:36 PM	#15
MakeMeLaugh Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Feb 20, 2006 Location: Virginia Posts: 78	that is the weirdest thing I have ever heard of! he NEEDS to shower! I would just tell him. I know that I would not be embarrassed to tell my dad. 2 years is just wrong. good luck with that.