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#1 |
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Member
Forum Regular
Join Date: Sep 18, 2006
Location: indiana
Posts: 632
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i found this on the net too and thought it was pretty funny!
liquid plummer warning- do not reuse the bottle to store beverages! windex- do not spray in eyes (awww darn!!!) bowl fresh- safe to use around pets and kids,although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from the toilet. toilet plunger- caution do not use around power lines (damn!!!!) dremel electric rotary tool- this product not intended for use as a dental drill. baby oil- keep out of reach of children. wet naps- open packet to use (ohhh is that how you do it!!!) ketchup- put on food (ohhhhhh!!!!) kids cough med- do not drive car or operate machinery (awww man!!!) cell phone- do not put lit candles on cell phone (but i can't see it!!!!) |
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#2 |
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Member
Forum Regular
Join Date: Oct 12, 2006
Location: Australia
Posts: 613
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Hahahahahahahahahahahahah....this 'll keep me laffing till 2007!!
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#3 |
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My favorite ladies!
Forum 4000 Club Member
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Wow some of those just don't make any sense. Funny.
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__________________
THE GOLDEN GIRLS! Sophia: (to Blanche) Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppie. This ain't gunna be no cakewalk. Blanche: I don't really mind Clayton being homosexual, I just don't like him dating men. Dorothy: You really haven't grasped the concept of this gay thing yet, have you? Blanche: There must be homosexuals who date women. Sophia: Yeah, they're called lesbians. JACOB |
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#4 |
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Member
Forum Regular
Join Date: Oct 12, 2006
Location: Australia
Posts: 613
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Perhaps it's because they make TOO MUCH sense!!!!
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#5 |
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JaJa
Senior Member
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you know that some of those warnings had to come about because some people did those lol!
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__________________
CSC--The Best Cycling Team in the World!! |
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#6 |
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I'm bringing Lexy back
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 07, 2005
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 2,374
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Product Warnings:
"Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet. "Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs. "For external use only!" -- On a curling iron. "Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron. "Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer. "Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer. "Do not use while sleeping or unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device. "Do not place this product into any electronic equipment." -- On the case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket. "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking." -- On a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan. "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." -- On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists. "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -- On an electric rotary tool. "Caution: Do not spray in eyes." -- On a container of underarm deodorant. "Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard. "Caution: This is not a safety protective device." -- On a plastic toy helmet used as a container for popcorn. "Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." -- On an "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter. "Battery may explore or leak." -- On a battery. See a scanned image. "Do not eat toner." -- On a toner cartridge for a laser printer. "Not intended for highway use." -- On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow. "This product is not to be used in bathrooms." -- On a Holmes bathroom heater. "May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defense pepper spray. "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock." "Caution! Contents hot!" -- On a Domino's Pizza box. "Caution: Hot beverages are hot!" -- On a coffee cup. "Warning: May contain small parts." -- On a frisbee. "Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush. "Please keep out of children." -- On a butcher knife. "Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less." -- On a birthday card for a 1 year old. "Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." -- On a battery. "Warning: Do not use on eyes." -- In the manual for a heated seat cushion. "Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer. "Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven. "For use on animals only." -- On an electric cattle prod. "For use by trained personnel only." -- On a can of air freshener. "Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener. "Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." -- On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror. "Warning: Riders of personal watercraft may suffer injury due to the forceful injection of water into body cavities either by falling into the water or while mounting the craft." -- In the manual for a jetski. "Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." -- A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm. "Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty. "Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator." -- On a bag of fresh grapes in Australia. "Warning: knives are sharp!" -- On the packaging of a sharpening stone. "Not for weight control." -- On a pack of Breath Savers. "Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth." -- On the label of a bottled drink. "Theft of this container is a crime." -- On a milk crate. "Do not use intimately." -- On a tube of deodorant. "Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice." -- On a box of rat poison. "Fragile. Do not drop." -- Posted on a Boeing 757. "Cannot be made non-poisonous." -- On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid. "Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller. "Excessive dust may be irritating to shin and eyes." -- On a tube of agarose powder, used to make gels. "Look before driving." -- On the dash board of a mail truck. "Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron. "Do not drive car or operate machinery." -- On Boot's children's cough medicine. "For indoor or outdoor use only." -- On a string of Christmas lights. "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." -- On a child sized Superman costume. "This door is alarmed from 7:00pm - 7:00am." -- On a hospital's outside access door. "Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station. "Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems." -- On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets. "Product will be hot after heating." -- On a supermarket dessert box. "Do not turn upside down." -- On the bottom of a supermarket dessert box. "Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame." -- On a lighter. "Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." -- On the label for a cheap rubber ball toy. "Not for human consumption." -- On a package of dice. "May be harmful if swallowed." -- On a shipment of hammers. "Using Ingenio cookware to destroy your old pots may void your warranty." -- A printed message that appears in a television advertisement when the presenter demonstrates how strong the cookware is by using it to beat up and destroy a regular frying pan. "Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw. "Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." -- From a manual for an SGI computer. "Warning: May contain nuts." -- On a package of peanuts. "Do not eat." -- On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the styrofoam packing. "Do not eat if seal is missing." -- On said seal. "Remove occupants from the stroller before folding it." "Access hole only -- not intended for use in lifting box." -- On the sides of a shipping carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds. "Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills. "Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle. "Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer. "Turn off motor before using this product." -- On the packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain. "Not to be used as a personal flotation device." -- On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame. "Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets. "Remove plastic before eating." -- On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack. "Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV. "For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack. "Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone. "Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants." -- On the packaging for a wristwatch. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Assurances: "Safe for use around pets." -- On a box of Arm & Hammer Cat Litter. |
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__________________
I look forward to resuming our verbal judo - Lex Luthor It's a complicated world, Clark. Only the naďve view it in black and white - Lex Luthor Lex: "Well, that’s a common mistake." Lionel Luthor: "We don't need to play games, son." Lex Luthor: "Dad, games are all we got." |
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#7 |
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My favorite ladies!
Forum 4000 Club Member
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LOL Those are great.
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#8 |
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Member
Forum Star
Join Date: Dec 01, 2000
Location: Between a rock and a hard place.
Posts: 11,235
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My favorite one I've seen is "Always cook before eating." on the back of a frozen pizza box.
Help encourage survival of the smartest: get rid of warning labels. |
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#9 |
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Dana is Buena
Senior Member
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lol nice
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__________________
Signed, >>>>Kristin Herrera Fan |
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