Stupid News - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

moofomoo · 10-26-2001, 11:01 AM

Alright guys I had to share this with you cuz every morning I am on the express bus into Manhattan, the radio station I listen to plays a special segment I love to listen to called-what else? "STUPID NEWS!" (Well, that and "what stupid thing will Greg T do today," but this is more fun to report back to you guys!)

Stupid news report for today (make yourself feel smarter) and one extra I remembered from Wednesday:

***A woman named Christine (I forget where) was pulled over for travelling 7 miles down a one way street going the WRONG WAY! When asked to comment about her driving she said, "I was driving safely, I don't know why I got pulled over, everything would have been fine if the people coming towards me wouldn't have been swerving so much!" The comment from the newscasters? Yeah...they were pretty much laughing and making miscellaneous comments about her driving, especially since she plead "not guilty" for reckless driving. She thinks she did nothing wrong. (what was she smoking?)

***A man (again, I forget where) drove up to a lady on the side of a street and kidnapped her. (It gets better...really!) He took her to his place where he made her do his laundry and clean his dishes! Then he took her back to where he found her and dropped her off. (Ok, my comments are as simple as the newscasters---I guess he got fed up with the mess and was too lazy to do it himself, but not too lazy to figure out a kidnapping scheme!)

***A man (if only I paid attention to where these things happened...it'd be easier to tell) who robbed a house figured it would have had better stuff in it, so when he got back to his place, he called up the people he had just stolen from to complain about how crappy their stuff was. (Who said beggars can't be chosers? lol) OOPS on his part though, they traced the call and the cops picked him up within hours! (Next time, use a payphone? 1-800-CALL-ATT!)

***From Wednesday: A man in Merced California (I remember California, I used to live there...lol) went in to rob a bank telling them he had a gun in his briefcase, and ordered they give him all their money or he'd shoot. When he started rummaging in his briefcase to show he wasn't joking, he didn't find the gun after all...newscasters said he "hung his head in shame and apologized for taking up their time" before leaving. (They also joked that they figured he left it in the OTHER briefcase, and he should come back tomorrow.)

And there you have the STUPID NEWS! Something to hopefully make you laugh and feel smarter about what you do in your daily routine.

**Gracie**

------------------
Delivery guy: "Blanche Deverux?"
Dorothy: "That's Devereaux...it's only pronounced the other way in limericks."
~~~~~~~~~~
Sophia: "Let me tell you girls the three most important things I learned about life: number one, hold fast to your friends; number two, there's no such thing as security; and number three, don't go see "Ishtar." Woof!"
~~~~~~~~~~
Dorothy: "You'll have to excuse my mother, she recently had a stroke rendering her totally annoying."
~~~~~~~~~~
Sophia: "Sticks and stones may brake your bones, but cement pays homage to tradition!"
~~~~~~~~~~
Sophia: "I think im pregnant."
Dorothy: "What happened, the rabbit died laughing?"
~~~~~~~~~~
Rose: "Sophia, why are you in such a bad mood?"
Sophia: "Excuse me Rose, I haven't had sex in fifteen years and its starting to get on my nerves."

marmalade · 10-26-2001, 06:38 PM

ks · 10-26-2001, 06:51 PM

LOL! I would love to have some daily STUPID news on my radio station

LOVED the last one!

tonicapollo · 10-26-2001, 07:16 PM

thats pretty kool

stuff did it really happen

they gatta be morons lol

------------------
hello all

humans are viruses all we do is breed spread out like germs a devaur everything we can..So killing the comon cold is the same as alians killing us!!!!!!!!!!

Beruche · 10-26-2001, 07:36 PM

It really does make me feel smarter

Sean Snow · 10-26-2001, 07:52 PM

LOL My Station Has This Too! But They're at around 8:20 AM, I leave for school 50 minutes earlier! But Some of These People Are Dumber Then Dirt!

moofomoo · 10-26-2001, 07:56 PM

Yes guys, silly and SAD as it may be, that is all TRUE!!!!

I tell ya what, to make people keep feeling smarter, I'll post the stupid news of the day Monday through Friday mornings, ok? I'll hear it and be able to post it right then (location and all this time...lol) and everyone can get a laugh.

To keep it from making the board bigger (and of course to keep TJ happy

) I'll keep it under this topic.

**Gracie**

PS-Anyone in the NYC area can listen to the Zoo Crew on Z100 and verify they said this on the "stupid news" broadcast.

Max Whittaker · 10-26-2001, 09:05 PM

Yes, please post it rregularly, if of course, it is not copyright infringement.

Kay Scarpetta · 10-27-2001, 09:29 AM

OMG

that is SO funny!! What idiot would call the people and practically tell them that they just robbed them?!?!

------------------
°·.*¤*-Karli Cauble-the Lisa Cult-*¤*.·°

**In the year 2005, Lauren and I are driving to California to beg and pleed Lisa Whelchel and Nancy McKeon to become our mothers. She will become "Lauren McKeon" and I will become "Karli-wait a minute. I can't become 'Karli Cauble' AGAIN, can I???" Oh well, Just remember us as the "Cauble/McKeon kids!!"**

This song shows an important message

*Look at me, You may think you see who I really am, but you'll never know me. Every day it's as if I play a part. Now I see if I wear a mask, I can fool the world, but I cannot fool my heart. Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? When will my reflection show who I am inside? I am now in a world where I have to hide my heart, and what I believe in. But somehow, I will show the world what's inside my heart, and be loved for who I am. Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Must I pretend that I'm someone else, for all time? When will my reflection show who I am inside? There's a heart that must be free to fly. That burns with a need to know the reason why. Why must we all conceal,
what we think, how we feel? Must there be a secret me, I'm forced to hide? I won't pretend that I'm someone else, for all time. When will my reflection show who I am inside, when will my reflection show who I am inside?*

Montana Ponine · 10-27-2001, 10:44 AM

!!!! Hahahaha! lol! thats hilarious!

Meg07945 · 10-27-2001, 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by moofomoo:
PS-Anyone in the NYC area can listen to the Zoo Crew on Z100 and verify they said this on the "stupid news" broadcast.

I used to listen to that....what time is on?! I usually listen to PST in the morning while I'm in the shower. A few years ago school started at like 9 and I would listen to like everything on Z100 (what the hell is this, and the one that sounded like pomp and circumstance (lol it was like random facts or something)...lol but6 now I am listening to Chris's Corner cause it fits into my schedule better (6:15!!) I used to do sound of the celebrity and stuff on PST, but thats on at 8:15! ahh... ok well on the z100 site there is a page for stupid news too...www.z100.com

------------------
MEG
¤Friends don't let friends get mullets!¤

~*hosebabe87*~ · 10-27-2001, 01:09 PM

hahaha!! that was funny moofomoo!!!! and I also really enjoyed your siggy!!!! I love the Golden GirlS!!!

------------------
~*MaRtA*~
me, marie, katie, driscoll, blake<~~~anti-socialists!!! WORD UP!! LOL!
everyone else sucks and we're great!! AH!!!! FISH!!!
um...there's an idiot at the door...lol!!
what's up all u message board people?! good times! lol! gotta fly! peace out!!!! WORD!~*!~*!~*!~*

moofomoo · 10-27-2001, 03:34 PM

Meg---it's the early morning zoocrew i listen between 8 and 9:15 because that's my commute generally. I love the stupid things they have Greg T do...reminds me of what my friend listens to in San Diego in the morning with Bromo (a guy like Greg T...but he keeps getting in situations where he ends up naked) and they're both freaks! Makes me feel better.

hosebabe---thanks, gotta love the Golden Girls, eh? I don't usually put my signature at the end cept when I put up a new topic or if I'm posting under the GG board.

**Gracie**

Sitcomwriter · 10-28-2001, 11:38 AM

I used to listen to that station but I have my own now but I'm a

person who only listens to

stuff ya dig?

America's favorite

writer

------------------
Next time on:

"Three's a Club"

"Meet Susan"
The new neighbor has a thing for Larry.

"The New Three's Company"

"Chrissy's job offer"
Chrissy considers taking a job in Alaska.

"American Women"

"American Sissy"
Chrissy thinks Sarah is a sissy.

Those are just some of Sitcomwriter's TC Spinoffs.

-------------------------
"Melody and Chrissy"
August 16th 2001-September 23rd 2001
May it rest in peace

moofomoo · 10-28-2001, 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sitcomwriter:
I used to listen to that station but I have my own now but I'm a person who only listens to stuff ya dig?

Nope, but then again I hardly ever understand stuff you say, to be perfectly honest with you. *shrugs*

**Gracie**

10-26-2001, 11:01 AM	#1
moofomoo #1 Hans Conried fan Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 29, 2001 Location: land of Liberty and Justice for ALL...you got a problem with that? Posts: 770	Stupid News Alright guys I had to share this with you cuz every morning I am on the express bus into Manhattan, the radio station I listen to plays a special segment I love to listen to called-what else? "STUPID NEWS!" (Well, that and "what stupid thing will Greg T do today," but this is more fun to report back to you guys!) Stupid news report for today (make yourself feel smarter) and one extra I remembered from Wednesday: *A woman named Christine (I forget where) was pulled over for travelling 7 miles down a one way street going the WRONG WAY! When asked to comment about her driving she said, "I was driving safely, I don't know why I got pulled over, everything would have been fine if the people coming towards me wouldn't have been swerving so much!" The comment from the newscasters? Yeah...they were pretty much laughing and making miscellaneous comments about her driving, especially since she plead "not guilty" for reckless driving. She thinks she did nothing wrong. (what was she smoking?) A man (again, I forget where) drove up to a lady on the side of a street and kidnapped her. (It gets better...really!) He took her to his place where he made her do his laundry and clean his dishes! Then he took her back to where he found her and dropped her off. (Ok, my comments are as simple as the newscasters---I guess he got fed up with the mess and was too lazy to do it himself, but not too lazy to figure out a kidnapping scheme!) A man (if only I paid attention to where these things happened...it'd be easier to tell) who robbed a house figured it would have had better stuff in it, so when he got back to his place, he called up the people he had just stolen from to complain about how crappy their stuff was. (Who said beggars can't be chosers? lol) OOPS on his part though, they traced the call and the cops picked him up within hours! (Next time, use a payphone? 1-800-CALL-ATT!) From Wednesday: A man in Merced California (I remember California, I used to live there...lol) went in to rob a bank telling them he had a gun in his briefcase, and ordered they give him all their money or he'd shoot. When he started rummaging in his briefcase to show he wasn't joking, he didn't find the gun after all...newscasters said he "hung his head in shame and apologized for taking up their time" before leaving. (They also joked that they figured he left it in the OTHER briefcase, and he should come back tomorrow.) And there you have the STUPID NEWS! Something to hopefully make you laugh and feel smarter about what you do in your daily routine. Gracie* ------------------ Delivery guy: "Blanche Deverux?" Dorothy: "That's Devereaux...it's only pronounced the other way in limericks." ~~~~~~~~~~ Sophia: "Let me tell you girls the three most important things I learned about life: number one, hold fast to your friends; number two, there's no such thing as security; and number three, don't go see "Ishtar." Woof!" ~~~~~~~~~~ Dorothy: "You'll have to excuse my mother, she recently had a stroke rendering her totally annoying." ~~~~~~~~~~ Sophia: "Sticks and stones may brake your bones, but cement pays homage to tradition!" ~~~~~~~~~~ Sophia: "I think im pregnant." Dorothy: "What happened, the rabbit died laughing?" ~~~~~~~~~~ Rose: "Sophia, why are you in such a bad mood?" Sophia: "Excuse me Rose, I haven't had sex in fifteen years and its starting to get on my nerves."

10-26-2001, 06:38 PM	#2
marmalade Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 18, 2001 Location: Louisiana Posts: 469

10-26-2001, 06:51 PM	#3
ks Certifiably Insane Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 21, 2000 Location: I live in my hole... Posts: 5,501	LOL! I would love to have some daily STUPID news on my radio station LOVED the last one!

10-26-2001, 07:16 PM	#4
tonicapollo Post Major Frequent Poster Join Date: Sep 18, 2001 Location: pueblo colorado u.s.a. Posts: 100	thats pretty kool stuff did it really happen they gatta be morons lol ------------------ hello all humans are viruses all we do is breed spread out like germs a devaur everything we can..So killing the comon cold is the same as alians killing us!!!!!!!!!!

10-26-2001, 07:36 PM	#5
Beruche Chicago Senior Member Join Date: Aug 27, 2001 Location: In anti land singing the lala song Posts: 2,613	It really does make me feel smarter

10-26-2001, 07:52 PM	#6
Sean Snow moo Forum Fanatic Join Date: May 06, 2001 Location: Georgia Posts: 10,408	LOL My Station Has This Too! But They're at around 8:20 AM, I leave for school 50 minutes earlier! But Some of These People Are Dumber Then Dirt!

10-26-2001, 07:56 PM	#7
moofomoo #1 Hans Conried fan Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 29, 2001 Location: land of Liberty and Justice for ALL...you got a problem with that? Posts: 770	Yes guys, silly and SAD as it may be, that is all TRUE!!!! I tell ya what, to make people keep feeling smarter, I'll post the stupid news of the day Monday through Friday mornings, ok? I'll hear it and be able to post it right then (location and all this time...lol) and everyone can get a laugh. To keep it from making the board bigger (and of course to keep TJ happy ) I'll keep it under this topic. Gracie PS-Anyone in the NYC area can listen to the Zoo Crew on Z100 and verify they said this on the "stupid news" broadcast.

10-26-2001, 09:05 PM	#8
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	Yes, please post it rregularly, if of course, it is not copyright infringement.

10-27-2001, 09:29 AM	#9
Kay Scarpetta Defy Gravity 8.26.05 Forum Superstar Join Date: Jul 04, 2001 Location: La Vie Boheme Posts: 28,013	OMG that is SO funny!! What idiot would call the people and practically tell them that they just robbed them?!?! ------------------ °·.¤-Karli Cauble-the Lisa Cult-¤.·° In the year 2005, Lauren and I are driving to California to beg and pleed Lisa Whelchel and Nancy McKeon to become our mothers. She will become "Lauren McKeon" and I will become "Karli-wait a minute. I can't become 'Karli Cauble' AGAIN, can I???" Oh well, Just remember us as the "Cauble/McKeon kids!!"**** This song shows an important message Look at me, You may think you see who I really am, but you'll never know me.* Every day it's as if I play a part. Now I see if I wear a mask, I can fool the world, but I cannot fool my heart. Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? When will my reflection show who I am inside? I am now in a world where I have to hide my heart, and what I believe in. But somehow, I will show the world what's inside my heart, and be loved for who I am. Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Must I pretend that I'm someone else, for all time? When will my reflection show who I am inside? There's a heart that must be free to fly. That burns with a need to know the reason why. Why must we all conceal, what we think, how we feel? Must there be a secret me, I'm forced to hide? I won't pretend that I'm someone else, for all time. When will my reflection show who I am inside, when will my reflection show who I am inside?*

10-27-2001, 10:44 AM	#10
Montana Ponine Tragically Beautiful Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 18, 2001 Location: Sondheimville Posts: 4,529	!!!! Hahahaha! lol! thats hilarious!

10-27-2001, 01:09 PM	#12
~hosebabe87~ Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 16, 2001 Posts: 304	hahaha!! that was funny moofomoo!!!! and I also really enjoyed your siggy!!!! I love the Golden GirlS!!! ------------------ ~MaRtA~ me, marie, katie, driscoll, blake<~~~anti-socialists!!! WORD UP!! LOL! everyone else sucks and we're great!! AH!!!! FISH!!! um...there's an idiot at the door...lol!! what's up all u message board people?! good times! lol! gotta fly! peace out!!!! WORD!~!~!~!~

10-27-2001, 03:34 PM	#13
moofomoo #1 Hans Conried fan Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 29, 2001 Location: land of Liberty and Justice for ALL...you got a problem with that? Posts: 770	Meg---it's the early morning zoocrew i listen between 8 and 9:15 because that's my commute generally. I love the stupid things they have Greg T do...reminds me of what my friend listens to in San Diego in the morning with Bromo (a guy like Greg T...but he keeps getting in situations where he ends up naked) and they're both freaks! Makes me feel better. hosebabe---thanks, gotta love the Golden Girls, eh? I don't usually put my signature at the end cept when I put up a new topic or if I'm posting under the GG board. Gracie

10-28-2001, 11:38 AM	#14
Sitcomwriter Member Forum Veteran Join Date: Feb 27, 2001 Posts: 7,356	I used to listen to that station but I have my own now but I'm a person who only listens to stuff ya dig? America's favorite writer ------------------ Next time on: "Three's a Club" "Meet Susan" The new neighbor has a thing for Larry. "The New Three's Company" "Chrissy's job offer" Chrissy considers taking a job in Alaska. "American Women" "American Sissy" Chrissy thinks Sarah is a sissy. Those are just some of Sitcomwriter's TC Spinoffs. ------------------------- "Melody and Chrissy" August 16th 2001-September 23rd 2001 May it rest in peace