Read this!! it's SO funny - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

IMakeBurgers · 10-28-2001, 04:27 PM

Lauren sent this to me in e-mail and I thought it was hilarious...

Once upon a time, there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." So she made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home. So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it. Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone. The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more,which reminded her of cooked cabbage. Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself. She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!! There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy Birthday"!!! Are you smiling??

------------------
§*¤~¤Jamie Chica Bungalo¤~¤*§ and Karli is Karli Chica Bungalo

Karli, IT BURNS!! LMFAO! What was our song again? When was my b-day again? hahaha!!!(inside jokes)

NANCY MCKEON IS DA BEST ACTRESS IN DA WORLD!!!!

Lisa, Lauren, Tiffany, and Jamie, da sLaNgSIsTaS!!!!

GUM IS GOOD!! LMFAO

My newNancy McKeon site..Check it out!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
please e-mail or IM me at:
Jamiegirl2006@aol.com , WishiniwasNancyM@aol.com, NancyMcKeonfan4L@aol.com,or NancyMcKeonfan2001@yahoo.com

Montana Ponine · 10-28-2001, 05:22 PM

That's pretty funny! That would be soo embarrasing!

ISmellFine · 10-28-2001, 05:23 PM

AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

OMG!!! Ok....I am ok...

------------------
--Kaley Jinny Exstead, co-Queen of the Asparagus Bobs, Pigs, Penguins, Coke, Insanity, Cows, and Elephants--

On April 24, 2008, Dana and I are going to meet in LA and handcuff ourselves to Nancy McKeon and Jay Harrington, and you're not. Ahahaha!

You weenie, this isn't cheerleading!

Jinny: Oh, come on, folks, please, don't be shy. Apparently anyone is welcome to crap all over me tonight, so please, step right on up!

Jinny [and me]: Don't screw with me.

*-*Five Queens and a Message Board. One Code: Hell Raising*-*

Go visit my lovely and wonderful website about the best and most talented actress in the entire world: Nancy McKeon!

Krisalicious · 10-28-2001, 05:25 PM

double post...

[This message has been edited by Sitcomsgrl89 (edited 10-28-2001).]

Krisalicious · 10-28-2001, 05:26 PM

LOL! That was funny!

the_biggest_nancy_fanatic · 10-28-2001, 05:40 PM

lol!!ya posted it....good idea...lol...i cracked up...hehe...omg..like what if that accually happened to you or somethin?!?!LOL!!

------------------
~Lauren McKeon~(duh jinmeister!)hehe
NANCY MCKEON IS THE BEST ACTRESS IN THE WORLD!!!
----(muh fav. quotes)----
BLAIR:we worked at edna's edibles,the finest store in all the land
JO:blair,your talkin like a leprechaun
------
BLAIR:i went to go get my picture taken at the passport place.the guy says "smile",and they camera broke
JO:*laughin*
------
mrs.G.-oh shoot shoot! JO:mrs.G. what is it? NAT:did tiny bubbles rub you the wrong way?
-----
Jinny:i can coddle(yes it is coddle not cuddle)
------
Jamie,Lisa,Tiffany and Lauren-da SlAnG sIsTaHs(GUM IS GOOD)
-----------
GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
------
my pledge to the best actress in the world:Nancy McKeon
i pledge alenge to nancy mckeon,of the best actresses in the world..and to the best actress for which she stands one nation,loving nancy,forever and always,with love and honer to her...amen
(note:i wrote this right afta i read that stupid article)lol
------
in da year 2005 me n karli are gonna drive tocalifornia to beg and pleed Nancy McKeonand
Lisa Whelchelto become our mothers.I will becomeLauren Mckeonand she will become
Karli..wait a min.she already isKarli Cauble..well..she will be
Karli Cauble,daughter of Lisa Whelchel..yeah hehe...
so remember us as..the mckeon/cauble kids!hahaha

AllIWantIsYourClutch · 10-28-2001, 05:55 PM

I heard that b4, but it's still funniful!

------------------
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~*Amy*~
CookieCupcake24@aol.com
AIM- MacNCheeze565
SFPDInspectorCD

"Oh please, folks, don't be shy! Apparantly anyone is welcome to crap all over me tonight,so step right on up!"~ Jinny Exstead.

"I give people chances who earn them...except insurance guys."~ C.D. DeLorenzo.

Rose~ It's a letter from St. Olaf. It's from the Department of Water and Coffee.
Blanche~ Coffee?
Rose~ No thanks. It makes me jumpy.

Sophia~ My butt fell asleep and you know what? I'm kinda getting into it.
*************************

Polka Dots turn me on!!! YEAH!!! HaHaHaHa!

DON'T CALL ME EASY MAC!

http://www.nancymckeon-division.cityslide.com

Acting Girl 19 · 10-28-2001, 06:53 PM

If that were me I would have died that was so funny

ks · 10-28-2001, 07:17 PM

That has to be one of the funniest stories I've heard in a long time!

ks

sue z q · 10-28-2001, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ks:
That has to be one of the funniest stories I've heard in a long time!
ks

I agree! That was great!

------------------
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Check out my Nancy McKeon Links site! http://www.geocities.com/nancymckeonlinkssite

Or my Site for Christian Teens! http://www.geocities.com/christianteenssite

And from your resident off-topic queens and royalty:

*^*^*~~~God Bless~~~*^*^*

vienna waits · 10-28-2001, 10:41 PM

LOL!! That was hilarious!!!

JoPol_wannabe · 10-28-2001, 11:54 PM

That's just to funny

. Oh man she reminds me of my brother even if he doesn't eat baked beans he farts like he has.

ThomasE · 10-29-2001, 03:51 PM

OH MY GOSH! HA HA HA! I can't believe that!

10-28-2001, 04:27 PM	#1
IMakeBurgers Borderline Amazing Senior Member Join Date: Oct 11, 2001 Location: Fayetteville, NC Posts: 1,595	Read this!! it's SO funny Lauren sent this to me in e-mail and I thought it was hilarious... Once upon a time, there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." So she made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home. So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it. Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone. The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more,which reminded her of cooked cabbage. Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself. She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!! There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy Birthday"!!! Are you smiling?? ------------------ §¤~¤Jamie Chica Bungalo¤~¤§ and Karli is Karli Chica Bungalo Karli, IT BURNS!! LMFAO! What was our song again? When was my b-day again? hahaha!!!(inside jokes) NANCY MCKEON IS DA BEST ACTRESS IN DA WORLD!!!! Lisa, Lauren, Tiffany, and Jamie, da sLaNgSIsTaS!!!! GUM IS GOOD!! LMFAO My newNancy McKeon site..Check it out! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~ please e-mail or IM me at: Jamiegirl2006@aol.com , WishiniwasNancyM@aol.com, NancyMcKeonfan4L@aol.com,or NancyMcKeonfan2001@yahoo.com

10-28-2001, 05:22 PM	#2
Montana Ponine Tragically Beautiful Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 18, 2001 Location: Sondheimville Posts: 4,529	That's pretty funny! That would be soo embarrasing!

10-28-2001, 05:23 PM	#3
ISmellFine Zim Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 13, 2001 Posts: 4,886	AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! OMG!!! Ok....I am ok... ------------------ --Kaley Jinny Exstead, co-Queen of the Asparagus Bobs, Pigs, Penguins, Coke, Insanity, Cows, and Elephants-- On April 24, 2008, Dana and I are going to meet in LA and handcuff ourselves to Nancy McKeon and Jay Harrington, and you're not. Ahahaha! You weenie, this isn't cheerleading! Jinny: Oh, come on, folks, please, don't be shy. Apparently anyone is welcome to crap all over me tonight, so please, step right on up! Jinny [and me]: Don't screw with me. -Five Queens and a Message Board. One Code: Hell Raising- Go visit my lovely and wonderful website about the best and most talented actress in the entire world: Nancy McKeon!

10-28-2001, 05:25 PM	#4
Krisalicious Archie FTW! Forum Veteran Join Date: Jun 27, 2001 Location: NJ Posts: 5,775	double post... [This message has been edited by Sitcomsgrl89 (edited 10-28-2001).]

10-28-2001, 05:26 PM	#5
Krisalicious Archie FTW! Forum Veteran Join Date: Jun 27, 2001 Location: NJ Posts: 5,775	LOL! That was funny!

10-28-2001, 05:40 PM	#6
the_biggest_nancy_fanatic Da NeXt InSpEcToR eX Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 12, 2001 Location: sum where in this crazy world of hott guyz Posts: 807	lol!!ya posted it....good idea...lol...i cracked up...hehe...omg..like what if that accually happened to you or somethin?!?!LOL!! ------------------ ~Lauren McKeon~(duh jinmeister!)hehe NANCY MCKEON IS THE BEST ACTRESS IN THE WORLD!!! ----(muh fav. quotes)---- BLAIR:we worked at edna's edibles,the finest store in all the land JO:blair,your talkin like a leprechaun ------ BLAIR:i went to go get my picture taken at the passport place.the guy says "smile",and they camera broke JO:laughin ------ mrs.G.-oh shoot shoot! JO:mrs.G. what is it? NAT:did tiny bubbles rub you the wrong way? ----- Jinny:i can coddle(yes it is coddle not cuddle) ------ Jamie,Lisa,Tiffany and Lauren-da SlAnG sIsTaHs(GUM IS GOOD) ----------- GOD BLESS AMERICA!!! ------ my pledge to the best actress in the world:Nancy McKeon i pledge alenge to nancy mckeon,of the best actresses in the world..and to the best actress for which she stands one nation,loving nancy,forever and always,with love and honer to her...amen (note:i wrote this right afta i read that stupid article)lol ------ in da year 2005 me n karli are gonna drive tocalifornia to beg and pleed Nancy McKeonand Lisa Whelchelto become our mothers.I will becomeLauren Mckeonand she will become Karli..wait a min.she already isKarli Cauble..well..she will be Karli Cauble,daughter of Lisa Whelchel..yeah hehe... so remember us as..the mckeon/cauble kids!hahaha

10-28-2001, 05:55 PM	#7
AllIWantIsYourClutch peaceout. Forum Icon Join Date: Aug 02, 2001 Location: Illinois. Posts: 53,424	I heard that b4, but it's still funniful! ------------------ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~Amy~ CookieCupcake24@aol.com AIM- MacNCheeze565 SFPDInspectorCD "Oh please, folks, don't be shy! Apparantly anyone is welcome to crap all over me tonight,so step right on up!"~ Jinny Exstead. "I give people chances who earn them...except insurance guys."~ C.D. DeLorenzo. Rose~ It's a letter from St. Olaf. It's from the Department of Water and Coffee. Blanche~ Coffee? Rose~ No thanks. It makes me jumpy. Sophia~ My butt fell asleep and you know what? I'm kinda getting into it. ************************* Polka Dots turn me on!!! YEAH!!! HaHaHaHa! DON'T CALL ME EASY MAC! http://www.nancymckeon-division.cityslide.com

10-28-2001, 06:53 PM	#8
Acting Girl 19 Angel...but DEVILISH Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 26, 2001 Location: Tennessee, USA Posts: 576	If that were me I would have died that was so funny

10-28-2001, 07:17 PM	#9
ks Certifiably Insane Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 21, 2000 Location: I live in my hole... Posts: 5,501	That has to be one of the funniest stories I've heard in a long time! ks

10-28-2001, 10:41 PM	#11
vienna waits avatars are stupid. Forum Superstar Join Date: May 18, 2001 Location: Ravenclaw Common Room Posts: 29,859	LOL!! That was hilarious!!!

10-28-2001, 11:54 PM	#12
JoPol_wannabe Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 11, 2001 Location: Nebraska Posts: 3,036	That's just to funny . Oh man she reminds me of my brother even if he doesn't eat baked beans he farts like he has.

10-29-2001, 03:51 PM	#13
ThomasE Member Moderator Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 04, 2000 Location: New York, New York, U.S.A. Posts: 10,857	OH MY GOSH! HA HA HA! I can't believe that!