I need some advice, badly! - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 09-03-2006, 12:26 AM

A few days ago, we went to the hospital to pick up my sister from work. While we were waiting for her to come out, an ambulance pulled in from my town, and for kicks, I just looked in the back. The lights were on. And who was there? My father! We were in shock. We knew he moved back here because my great-aunt and my grandmother (both on his side of the family) are dying. He moved back from Florida to help. Anyway, when my sister came out, we told her. She said she saw him too. She wanted to go over there to spook him out, since he would never expect my sister to be there let alone in scrubs. So she went and we were watching, and she starts talking to him!

We didn't see that coming. She even hugged him. For anyone who doesn't know, when my father found out my brother was autistic 5 years ago, he left, never called us again. He told my sister he never stopped thinking about us and my grandmother would love to see us before she dies. She has cancer, going for her fourth round of chemo he said. My sister hasn't decided what to do. Since I am going to be 18, my mother said I can decide this on my own. He said he'd love to see me and Erin (my sister.) My mom won't let my brother near him. So I have to decide what to do. Tomorrow is my day to get in contact with him and I'm just not sure. Has he really changed? Will this be on big goose chase? I want a relationship with my father SO bad. Anything has to be better than crying every father's day. I figured maybe I'd start slowly, email him. See what he says.

I really need opinions! Thanks!

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 12:35 AM

Running into the father you haven't seen in five years at the hospital. This has to be one of the strangest things I have ever heard. I think that you should probably give him a chance. Even though he may have caused you a lot of hurt in the past, he is still your father. Though, I think that it would be a good idea to take things slowly and not to rush into anything. Then if things don't work out, you will not be as hurt and disappointed. Your father leaving because of your brother's condition was a terrible thing for him to have done, but some parents just have a great deal of difficulty excepting a child with a handicap. It is not that they are being heartless, I think when a parent learns that their child has a handicap they often times feel guilty wondering if it was something they did that caused the handicap. And that can sometimes be a pretty big burden.

Good luck, Kell.

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 09-03-2006, 12:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

Running into the father you haven't seen in five years at the hospital. This has to be one of the strangest things I have ever heard. I think that you should probably give him a chance. Even though he may have caused you a lot of hurt in the past, he is still your father. Though, I think that it would be a good idea to take things slowly and not to rush into anything. Then if things don't work out, you will not be as hurt and disappointed. Your father leaving because of your brother's condition was a terrible thing for him to have done, but some parents just have a great deal of difficulty excepting a child with a handicap. It is not that they are being heartless, I think when a parent learns that their child has a handicap they often times feel guilty wondering if it was something they did that caused the handicap. And that can sometimes be a pretty big burden.

Good luck, Kell.

Thanks Mike. I think I am going to send him an email tomorrow and take it from there. I'll let you know. I think I want to take the chance of getting hurt than wonder "if" for the rest of my life.

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo_Luvs_Ketchup

Thanks Mike. I think I am going to send him an email tomorrow and take it from there. I'll let you know. I think I want to take the chance of getting hurt than wonder "if" for the rest of my life.

Yeah, being hurt is in the long run better than going through life wondering "what if" when it comes to pretty much anything.

Max Whittaker · 09-03-2006, 01:01 AM

Your mother is right in leaving the desision to you. You're an adult. Do what your heart tells you. Don't be afraid of being hurt. It's better than asking yourself "what if" for the rest of your life.

It looks to me you already know what it is you want to do. Go for it, with our blessing!

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Max Whittaker

Your mother is right in leaving the desision to you. You're an adult. Do what your heart tells you. Don't be afraid of being hurt. It's better than asking yourself "what if" for the rest of your life.

It looks to me you already know what it is you want to do. Go for it, with our blessing!

That is good advice.

Wow, our little Kelly is going to be an adult soon.

It makes me feel old.

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 09-03-2006, 01:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

That is good advice.

Wow, our little Kelly is going to be an adult soon.

It makes me feel old.

I know! *sniff* I'm growing up! haha

Thanks for the advice Max. I'm going to go for it and I'll let everyone know. Hopefully I won't be hurt.

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 01:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo_Luvs_Ketchup

I know! *sniff* I'm growing up! haha

When you were born I was in the beginning of seventh grade.

You were born two months after NBC showed the final episode of The Facts of Life. I remember they reaired the series fianle in August 1988. I remember because that two part episode and "The Apartment" were the only FOL episodes that I actually saw back in the 1980's.

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 09-03-2006, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

When you were born I was in the beginning of seventh grade.

You were born two months after NBC showed the final episode of The Facts of Life. I remember they reaired the series fianle in August 1988. I remember because that two part episode and "The Apartment" were the only FOL episodes that I actually saw back in the 1980's.

Wow that's cool trivia!

Jen, I don't know why but I always thought you were younger!

So I was in shock when I read that haha. Always nice to have FOL friends tho. FOL ROCKS!

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 01:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by _Jen_

Just reading that makes me feel old.

I was 10 in 1988. I'm not sure if I saw the FOL finale or not since I don't really remember watching it.

I actually watched it with my grandma.

My grandma LOVED The Facts Of Life. I never really understoond how a woman born in 1921 could relate to four girls born in the late 1960's.

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 01:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo_Luvs_Ketchup

Wow that's cool trivia!

Jen, I don't know why but I always thought you were younger!

So I was in shock when I read that haha. Always nice to have FOL friends tho. FOL ROCKS!

Next week I will see "Take My Finals, Please" and "Graduation" for the first time.

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 09-03-2006, 01:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

Next week I will see "Take My Finals, Please" and "Graduation" for the first time.

Awesome, both great episodes! Don't forget to look at the blooper!!

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 02:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo_Luvs_Ketchup

Awesome, both great episodes! Don't forget to look at the blooper!!

My favorite episode (of season four and the entire series) is still "Teacher's Pet". I think Nancy did a great job in that one. It is such a sad episode and she was simply terrific in it. I also really liked "Ain't Miss Beholden" and "Who's On First" from the fourth season.

Nighthawk76 · 09-03-2006, 02:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by _Jen_

Most people think I'm younger.

I was born in October 1978.

I think that a big part of why so many people think that you are younger is because your old username was Jen1989. I think people thought you were actually born in 1989.

Cactus Jack · 09-03-2006, 02:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

I think that a big part of why so many people think that you are younger is because your old username was Jen1989. I think people thought you were actually born in 1989.

Me being one of those

09-03-2006, 12:26 AM	#1
Jo_Luvs_Ketchup Member Eternal Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 09, 2003 Posts: 4,195	I need some advice, badly! A few days ago, we went to the hospital to pick up my sister from work. While we were waiting for her to come out, an ambulance pulled in from my town, and for kicks, I just looked in the back. The lights were on. And who was there? My father! We were in shock. We knew he moved back here because my great-aunt and my grandmother (both on his side of the family) are dying. He moved back from Florida to help. Anyway, when my sister came out, we told her. She said she saw him too. She wanted to go over there to spook him out, since he would never expect my sister to be there let alone in scrubs. So she went and we were watching, and she starts talking to him! We didn't see that coming. She even hugged him. For anyone who doesn't know, when my father found out my brother was autistic 5 years ago, he left, never called us again. He told my sister he never stopped thinking about us and my grandmother would love to see us before she dies. She has cancer, going for her fourth round of chemo he said. My sister hasn't decided what to do. Since I am going to be 18, my mother said I can decide this on my own. He said he'd love to see me and Erin (my sister.) My mom won't let my brother near him. So I have to decide what to do. Tomorrow is my day to get in contact with him and I'm just not sure. Has he really changed? Will this be on big goose chase? I want a relationship with my father SO bad. Anything has to be better than crying every father's day. I figured maybe I'd start slowly, email him. See what he says. I really need opinions! Thanks!

09-03-2006, 12:35 AM	#2
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	Running into the father you haven't seen in five years at the hospital. This has to be one of the strangest things I have ever heard. I think that you should probably give him a chance. Even though he may have caused you a lot of hurt in the past, he is still your father. Though, I think that it would be a good idea to take things slowly and not to rush into anything. Then if things don't work out, you will not be as hurt and disappointed. Your father leaving because of your brother's condition was a terrible thing for him to have done, but some parents just have a great deal of difficulty excepting a child with a handicap. It is not that they are being heartless, I think when a parent learns that their child has a handicap they often times feel guilty wondering if it was something they did that caused the handicap. And that can sometimes be a pretty big burden. Good luck, Kell.

09-03-2006, 01:01 AM	#5
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	Your mother is right in leaving the desision to you. You're an adult. Do what your heart tells you. Don't be afraid of being hurt. It's better than asking yourself "what if" for the rest of your life. It looks to me you already know what it is you want to do. Go for it, with our blessing!