Am I overreacting?? Trade issues - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Peanutbutter · 07-21-2006, 09:14 PM

I made a trade with a member of this board,
I won't name names because I don't wanna start anything.

This trader and I agreed to ship on the same day (Saturday)
I shipped on Saturday. Priority mail with tracking.
I didn't receive my package until today. 1st class with no tracking.
I was under the impression that we were both going to ship the same.
Rereading the emails, I see that it wasn't fully discussed one way or the other.

During this week, I sent some emails asking if the package was shipped on Saturday. He said "Yes" When I didn't get it yesterday, I sent an email asking for the tracking number. He said "I have to look for it". That implies that he had a tracking number.

So this was our 1st trade together. When I asked him about the lying, His response was "I just like to wait till I receive packages from you or others first so I don't get burned."

He said we didn't agreed to ship same day even though there's an email that says the exact words.

He did apologize, but I feel that it was insincere.
He has some Jimmy Neutron eps I really wanted, but I told him that he would have to send 1st because of what happened, but he told me that he couldn't do that.

He doesn't trust me even though he was the one lying to me.

I'm feeling kind of pissed.

Am I over reacting?

digitalmonkey · 07-21-2006, 09:49 PM

IMO you should be pissed because you were lied to. With that said, it appears that you don't have to worry about sending first. From your description it just seems like the other guy has been burned a few times. I'm sure both of you can put it behind you and continue to trade in the future.

savageamusement · 07-22-2006, 01:36 AM

I've botched sometimes, becuase my intentions were to send- and sometimes something happens
I know last week I intended to send kristenherrarafans stuff out and we lost power, to the PO was shut.
Things can happen.

But I try to let them know ASAP and not leave anyoen disapointed.

All I can say is try to be forgiving, things do happen

But communicate that you were bothered, after your temper or dispaointment settles a little
Sometimes what is a big deal to one isn't to another...

It does sound like ther ewas some dishonesty, which - lets face it- there is a differnece between a mistake and a lie.
So trust your gut and be glad the lie was the tracking number,. and not that the item wasn't sent at all-
But in the future if you should trade them again, outline things more carefully or simply don't trade them again.

We all have our expecations - if yours aren't being met- there are plenty of traders that will meet them.

loren · 07-22-2006, 07:11 AM

spell out all trade provisions--previous to a confirmed deal

any deviation from that, is a problem

anytime an agreement is changed--after--its made is a problem

i spell it out up front if i choose to receive first before i send to an unknown or suspect person

its just plain talk and simple honesty

tracking numbers, i get them with click ship, but i wouldnt look anything up until 10 days after i ship

they mean nothing what so ever

most folks ship from a normal postal outlet, and the numbers dont get entered into the system for days, i have had people get all mad, since the number i provided them isnt in the system, i have seen where people reported they had the item, and its still not in the system

with click ship, many times i will drop mine off at a small post office in a town of 300 people, they hand enter them on the computer, well sometimes they do, sometimes they dont

so i quit folling with giving them out , its a waste of my effort, and an easy problem waiting to happen

so dont get bent about del con numbers, remember they ARE NOT tracking numbers what so ever

RedWhine56 · 07-23-2006, 05:45 AM

One thing that grinds my gears is deception, be it explicit or implied. I agree that you're fortunate to have received what you requested. So it wasn't a "bad" trade. But when he said "I have to look for it", it does indeed imply he had shipped & had a d/c number. Granted, maybe he got confused, but if he never came back & said so, then...I'm a cynic & tend to class this as deceptive. Communication & honesty are valued traits, IMO. I do not deal with deceptive people, regardless if they are considered honest traders on this board. JMO. And anyone who doesn't trust you, after they were deceptive, and you've now had one successful trade and I know you've got positive feedback on this board, well, I'd steer clear of them. Where there's smoke, there's fire. Again, JMO.

If he has something you still want & you don't feel comfortable doing another trade with his conditions, then don't do it. One thing about this hobby that is hard to learn is that if one person has it, someone else has it. Be patient. You will find someone else who has what you're looking for.

07-21-2006, 09:14 PM	#1
Peanutbutter Let My People Go! Frequent Poster Join Date: May 28, 2006 Location: The Savage Lands Posts: 154	Am I overreacting?? Trade issues I made a trade with a member of this board, I won't name names because I don't wanna start anything. This trader and I agreed to ship on the same day (Saturday) I shipped on Saturday. Priority mail with tracking. I didn't receive my package until today. 1st class with no tracking. I was under the impression that we were both going to ship the same. Rereading the emails, I see that it wasn't fully discussed one way or the other. During this week, I sent some emails asking if the package was shipped on Saturday. He said "Yes" When I didn't get it yesterday, I sent an email asking for the tracking number. He said "I have to look for it". That implies that he had a tracking number. So this was our 1st trade together. When I asked him about the lying, His response was "I just like to wait till I receive packages from you or others first so I don't get burned." He said we didn't agreed to ship same day even though there's an email that says the exact words. He did apologize, but I feel that it was insincere. He has some Jimmy Neutron eps I really wanted, but I told him that he would have to send 1st because of what happened, but he told me that he couldn't do that. He doesn't trust me even though he was the one lying to me. I'm feeling kind of pissed. Am I over reacting?

07-21-2006, 09:49 PM	#2
digitalmonkey just getting started Frequent Poster Join Date: Jun 14, 2006 Location: Sudbury, Ontario, Canada Posts: 351	IMO you should be pissed because you were lied to. With that said, it appears that you don't have to worry about sending first. From your description it just seems like the other guy has been burned a few times. I'm sure both of you can put it behind you and continue to trade in the future.
	__________________ Top of Want List Toupie and Binoo NHL games What's New Mr. Magoo? Abbott and Costello Animated Series Tales of the Wizard of Oz Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em http://www.freewebs.com/digital_monkey/

07-22-2006, 01:36 AM	#3
savageamusement Cutest Couch Potato Senior Member Join Date: Oct 21, 2003 Posts: 2,103	expectations I've botched sometimes, becuase my intentions were to send- and sometimes something happens I know last week I intended to send kristenherrarafans stuff out and we lost power, to the PO was shut. Things can happen. But I try to let them know ASAP and not leave anyoen disapointed. All I can say is try to be forgiving, things do happen But communicate that you were bothered, after your temper or dispaointment settles a little Sometimes what is a big deal to one isn't to another... It does sound like ther ewas some dishonesty, which - lets face it- there is a differnece between a mistake and a lie. So trust your gut and be glad the lie was the tracking number,. and not that the item wasn't sent at all- But in the future if you should trade them again, outline things more carefully or simply don't trade them again. We all have our expecations - if yours aren't being met- there are plenty of traders that will meet them.
	__________________ WWW.SavageTraders.org To avoid channel surfing Wipeouts!

07-23-2006, 05:45 AM	#5
RedWhine56 Sleigh? What sleigh? Forum Regular Join Date: Aug 03, 2005 Location: In the "Secret Room" with the cronies! Posts: 756	One thing that grinds my gears is deception, be it explicit or implied. I agree that you're fortunate to have received what you requested. So it wasn't a "bad" trade. But when he said "I have to look for it", it does indeed imply he had shipped & had a d/c number. Granted, maybe he got confused, but if he never came back & said so, then...I'm a cynic & tend to class this as deceptive. Communication & honesty are valued traits, IMO. I do not deal with deceptive people, regardless if they are considered honest traders on this board. JMO. And anyone who doesn't trust you, after *they* were deceptive, and you've now had one successful trade and I know you've got positive feedback on this board, well, I'd steer clear of them. Where there's smoke, there's fire. Again, JMO. If he has something you still want & you don't feel comfortable doing another trade with his conditions, then don't do it. One thing about this hobby that is hard to learn is that if one person has it, someone else has it. Be patient. You will find someone else who has what you're looking for.
	__________________ Off to Never, Never Land... ...Metallica

07-22-2006, 07:11 AM	#4
loren Member Senior Member Join Date: Feb 11, 2005 Posts: 1,516	spell out all trade provisions--previous to a confirmed deal any deviation from that, is a problem anytime an agreement is changed--after--its made is a problem i spell it out up front if i choose to receive first before i send to an unknown or suspect person its just plain talk and simple honesty tracking numbers, i get them with click ship, but i wouldnt look anything up until 10 days after i ship they mean nothing what so ever most folks ship from a normal postal outlet, and the numbers dont get entered into the system for days, i have had people get all mad, since the number i provided them isnt in the system, i have seen where people reported they had the item, and its still not in the system with click ship, many times i will drop mine off at a small post office in a town of 300 people, they hand enter them on the computer, well sometimes they do, sometimes they dont so i quit folling with giving them out , its a waste of my effort, and an easy problem waiting to happen so dont get bent about del con numbers, remember they ARE NOT tracking numbers what so ever