Thoughts to ponder

[lilhave]

Strange Things to Ponder


How come wrong numbers are never busy?

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world "up
over"?

Does that screwdriver belong to Philip?

Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an
address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and
dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Are part-time bandleaders semi-conductors?

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?

Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where
do they keep it?

Did Noah keep his bees in archives?

Do jellyfish get gas from eating jellybeans?

Do pilots take crash-courses?

Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers?

Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID
that he just whipped out a quarter? [NOTE: Geo.Washington's picture is on a
quarter]

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

How do you write zero in Roman numerals?

How many weeks are there in a light year?

If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?

If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?

If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?

If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?

If cats and dogs didn't have fur would we still pet them?

If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then
what are Girl Scout cookies made out of?

If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?

If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales
look the way they do?

If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog
horns out of?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?

If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several
times, does he become disoriented?

Why do the signs that say "Slow Children" have a picture
of a running child?

Why do they call it "chili" if it's hot?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game, when we are
already there?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Harvey

[Courtnee]

[G-Force Glockstar]

I want those answers!

[Hollow]

yayyyy i <3 skewering these.


How come wrong numbers are never busy?
huh..

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world "up
over"?
some probably do, for the sake of playing on their "down under" nickname.

Does that screwdriver belong to Philip?
what?

Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?
being a smartass means being technical or bombastic; if they have enough intelligence for that, then yes.

Does killing time damage eternity?
no.

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
the creators either forgot about it or decided not to give him one; fiction isn't always realistic you know.

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
it sticks on your lips.

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?
that's the way people have applied the terms, they don't have to correspond each other.

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
since when was there an official order of the hands....and it points to which exact second it is on the clock.

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an
address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
it's harder to focus on looking for information when you have music that keeps distracting your concentration. duh.

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and
dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
because that's the way the companies made them.

Are part-time bandleaders semi-conductors?
huh?

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?
if there is one available, then yes, you can.

Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where
do they keep it?
they "save" it so it will will last longer in one's daily routine, and they "keep" it later in the day, towards night time.

Did Noah keep his bees in archives?
no, they probably stayed in beehives.

Do jellyfish get gas from eating jellybeans?
they can't eat jellybeans, nor do they have the same digestive system as mammals in the first place, and nor do jellybeans come from beans.

Do pilots take crash-courses?
probably.

Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers?
no.

Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID
that he just whipped out a quarter? [NOTE: Geo.Washington's picture is on a
quarter]
no, because he died 130 years before the washington quarter was minted.

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
no.

Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?
no.

How can there be self-help "groups"?
they help themselves.

How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
you can't.

How many weeks are there in a light year?
no such concept exists in reality.

If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?
no, because he would create a sonic boom.

If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
no.

If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?
they still exist.

If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?
they aren't necessary.

If cats and dogs didn't have fur would we still pet them?
if we wanted to, but would be less likely too because they aren't as soft.

If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then
what are Girl Scout cookies made out of?
they're sponsored by girl scouts.

If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?
it's not a household vacuum cleaner.

If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales
look the way they do?
they're supposed to look that way.

If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog
horns out of?
brass.

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
if it's preferred.

If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
for the non-drinkers to drive the drinkers home.

If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
no.

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several
times, does he become disoriented?
possibly dazed, but still oriental.

Why do the signs that say "Slow Children" have a picture
of a running child?
nothing indicates that the child is running, it could be walking.

Why do they call it "chili" if it's hot?
it's not associated with the word chilly.

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game, when we are
already there?
because it's about baseball.

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
because everyone is trying to rush.

[Chocoholic]

Good answers, Sarah!