The official (or unofficial) Chuck Norris Joke/Legend/Quick Fact thread - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

JNSBSB · 07-12-2006, 05:08 AM

Anyone know of any good Chuck Norris Jokes/Quick Facts?

I only know that everytime Chuck Norris walks, earthquakes occur where he steps.

TJL · 07-12-2006, 04:09 PM

Chuck Norris' tears can sure cancer.

It's too bad he's never cried.

Courtnee · 07-12-2006, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TJL

Chuck Norris' tears can sure cancer.

It's too bad he's never cried.

Chuck Norris has a grill like George Forman that runs not on electricty, but the tears of his victims.

TJL · 07-12-2006, 06:14 PM

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost!

Courtnee · 07-12-2006, 06:16 PM

Chuck Norris eats emo kids for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Number 9 Dream · 07-12-2006, 06:16 PM

*clears throat*

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

That is all.

Courtnee · 07-12-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

Hollow · 07-12-2006, 07:52 PM

TOP THREE CHUCK NORRIS FACTS:

1. chuck norris got into a fight with a knife, and the knife lost.
2. when the boogey man goes to bed at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris.
3. chuck norris went back in time to stop JFK from getting shot, and JFK was so excited about having his life saved that his head exploded.
4. chuck norris can have four chuck norris facts on a top three chuck norris facts list.

Liza · 07-14-2006, 02:20 PM

When God said "Let there be light" Chuck Norris said "Do I hear a please?"

TJL · 07-14-2006, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Liza

When God said "Let there be light" Chuck Norris said "Do I hear a 'please'?"

I like that one.

07-12-2006, 05:08 AM	#1
JNSBSB Member Forum Regular Join Date: Dec 11, 2004 Location: In a room turned into a theater room inside a cave in sunny Texas. Posts: 593	The official (or unofficial) Chuck Norris Joke/Legend/Quick Fact thread Anyone know of any good Chuck Norris Jokes/Quick Facts? I only know that everytime Chuck Norris walks, earthquakes occur where he steps.
	__________________ Please vote for The Division starring Nancy McKeon, Lisa Vidal and Bonnie Bedelia to be released onto DVD at http://www.tvshowsondvd.com/showinfo.cfm?showID=439 or www.tvshowsondvd.com. The Division deserves a DVD release, so Nancy McKeon fans and fans of The Division, don't forget to vote at http://www.tvshowsondvd.com/showinfo.cfm?showID=439. Nancy McKeon is the best actress there ever is!

07-12-2006, 04:09 PM	#2
TJL Suburbanite Extrordinaire Forum Star Join Date: Dec 29, 2001 Location: New Jersey - the cradle of civilization Posts: 16,588	Chuck Norris' tears can sure cancer. It's too bad he's never cried.
	__________________ "I think I'll stroll up to the front to see how the shooting's going..." - Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce Read my blogs! http://centralparkamisguide.com/ http://dvdcriticscorner.com Visit me on Facebook!http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=641138880 Hey, I do the tweet thing too! http://twitter.com/TomLevier My shop of handmade items! http://www.etsy.com/shop/ColdGarageCreations

07-12-2006, 06:16 PM	#6
Number 9 Dream That '70s Girl Forum Veteran Join Date: Jan 18, 2005 Location: Long Island, NY Posts: 5,875	clears throat http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ That is all.
	__________________ Live a little be a gypsy get around http://www.librarything.com/profile/skelterhelter http://retrogirl82.dvdaf.com/owned formerly Retrogirl82

07-14-2006, 02:20 PM	#9
Liza BestYearsofOurLives Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 24, 2001 Location: Rochester, NY Posts: 6,537	When God said "Let there be light" Chuck Norris said "Do I hear a please?"
	Last edited by Liza; 07-14-2006 at 05:05 PM.

07-12-2006, 06:14 PM	#4
TJL Suburbanite Extrordinaire Forum Star Join Date: Dec 29, 2001 Location: New Jersey - the cradle of civilization Posts: 16,588	Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost!

07-12-2006, 06:16 PM	#5
Courtnee MAN VS SAMMICH. Forum Star Join Date: Mar 23, 2005 Location: Louisiana Posts: 16,413	Chuck Norris eats emo kids for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

07-12-2006, 07:52 PM	#8
Hollow Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 16, 2001 Posts: 30,406	TOP THREE CHUCK NORRIS FACTS: 1. chuck norris got into a fight with a knife, and the knife lost. 2. when the boogey man goes to bed at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris. 3. chuck norris went back in time to stop JFK from getting shot, and JFK was so excited about having his life saved that his head exploded. 4. chuck norris can have four chuck norris facts on a top three chuck norris facts list.