Why It's Not A Good Idea For Men To Tick Off Women While Driving (Joke) - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Family Ties Forever! · 06-29-2006, 01:20 PM

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to swerve onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his
arm out his window and gave the woman the finger.

"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I always smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic and here's why: I drive 48 miles each way every day to work; that's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way are bumper-to-bumper. Most of
the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8-lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4,000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day. Statistically, females drive half of these. That's 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying
or unrewarding. That's 449. According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33. According to the
National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons, and this number is increasing.

That means that every single day, I drive past at least one female who has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Give her the finger? .... I don't think so!!!!!!!

Nighthawk76 · 06-29-2006, 06:54 PM

I've always known not to upset a woman behind the wheel.

80sTrivia · 06-29-2006, 07:15 PM

Those are some sobering statistics!!!

KristinHerreraFan · 06-29-2006, 09:39 PM

Im a big deal · 06-29-2006, 10:41 PM

DANG!! thats a lot of math

Jo_Luvs_Ketchup · 06-29-2006, 11:14 PM

Solomon should read this!!!!

Nighthawk76 · 06-30-2006, 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo_Luvs_Ketchup

Solomon should read this!!!!

I think that you should tell him about it, Kelly.

Courtnee · 06-30-2006, 06:48 PM

06-29-2006, 01:20 PM	#1
Family Ties Forever! Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 16, 2002 Location: Keaton residence Posts: 10,214	Why It's Not A Good Idea For Men To Tick Off Women While Driving (Joke) I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to swerve onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the finger. "Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I always smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic and here's why: I drive 48 miles each way every day to work; that's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way are bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8-lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4,000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day. Statistically, females drive half of these. That's 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449. According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33. According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons, and this number is increasing. That means that every single day, I drive past at least one female who has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed. Give her the finger? .... I don't think so!!!!!!!
	__________________ Jenny

06-29-2006, 07:15 PM	#3
80sTrivia Member Forum Celebrity Join Date: May 23, 2002 Posts: 21,714	Those are some sobering statistics!!!
	__________________ Perfect Gift Books for Pop Culture Fanatics: Thank You for Being a Friend: A Golden Girls Trivia Book The Bouquet Residence: A Keeping Up Appearances Trivia Book Cooking With the Golden Girls: Fun & Delicious Recipes from a Hilarious Miami Kitchen Love in the Afternoon: The Ultimate Soap Opera Trivia Book The Last Great Decade: The Ultimate 90s Trivia Book Betty White: A Celebration

06-29-2006, 09:39 PM	#4
KristinHerreraFan Dana is Buena Senior Member Join Date: Jan 16, 2005 Location: Jacksonville, FL Posts: 2,791
	__________________ Signed, >>>>Kristin Herrera Fan

06-29-2006, 10:41 PM	#5
Im a big deal Walk on Frequent Poster Join Date: Feb 18, 2006 Location: In the middle of nowhere (aka Grafton) i mean...our school is between two wheat fields, whats up with that? Posts: 113	DANG!! thats a lot of math
	__________________ FRIENDS "Yeah! Ooh, we could teach them to sing, and we can be like the Von Trapp family! Only without the Nazis. Although that sounds kinda dull." i feel wonderful because i see the love light in your eyes and the wonder of it all is that you just dont realize how much i love you

06-30-2006, 06:48 PM	#8
Courtnee MAN VS SAMMICH. Forum Star Join Date: Mar 23, 2005 Location: Louisiana Posts: 16,413
	__________________ Whether I'm the rose of sheer perfection A freckle on the nose of life's complexion The Cinderella or the shine apple of its eye I gotta fly once, I gotta try once, Only can die once, right, sir? Ooh, life is juicy, juicy and you see, I gotta have my bite, sir. Get ready for me love, 'cause I'm a "comer" I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade

06-29-2006, 06:54 PM	#2
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	I've always known not to upset a woman behind the wheel.

06-29-2006, 11:14 PM	#6
Jo_Luvs_Ketchup Member Eternal Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 09, 2003 Posts: 4,195	Solomon should read this!!!!