If you were adopted, would you look for your real mother? Would you meet? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Howdoulikemenow333 · 05-07-2006, 10:26 PM

What if you were adopit,would you find your birth monter even though she may be on this earth any more. This really happen I changed the names to protect the people in thisstory. This happen in Anchorage,Alaska a sixteen year old girl name Nellie was seduced by this army she found out that she was goingto have a baby. When the baby was born she was 17,but she did not see the baby the Chathloic service took the baby away. That's how they did it if you were a teen ager. Now this women is dead and her sister is trying to look for the boy which he is 24 now. Would you want your monther to find you,but now she died and her sister wants to find you? And what do you think about taking babies away from there monters when there 16,17. Did they have the right to do it, liek I said back in the 60's 50's they did it differn'et then we do now about taking babies aweay from un wed teen monthers or do they?

Mr. Television · 05-07-2006, 11:29 PM

If I was adopted I'd want to know.

dawsongirl · 05-08-2006, 03:39 AM

I can't really say either way. This is one of those hypotheticals I can't answer unless I was in the situation.

Janice · 05-08-2006, 08:38 PM

My gut tells me no. If I found out I was adopted when my parents were alive, I wouldn't want to hurt them. I felt too "theirs" anyway.

If I found out this minute, I still say no. My parents are my parents. It's hard to explain, and like Cathy points out, a person would have to be in that position to really know what they would do.

Nighthawk76 · 05-08-2006, 09:35 PM

My parents said they found me when I was six months old being raised by wolves.

TheHappyBurgerMeister · 05-08-2006, 10:11 PM

I think I would definitely want to find my birth mother. But first I would talk about it with my adoptive parents and see how they feel about it; hoping they would support me.

My neighbor was adopted and for years she didn't know her birth mother. Then when she was around 21, I believe, her birth mother wanted to find HER. She gave birth to her when she was a teenager. She didn't want to meet her at first, but then she decided to. Since then she's been reunited with her real mom, her half sisters, and the rest of her family. And of course she has a parents that raised her and her adoptive siblings. It seems kind of weird that she has 2 moms now. She refers to her biological mom and family her "other family". She's 34 now and her and her husband are expecting their first baby.

Ireneparalegal · 05-08-2006, 10:54 PM

Being adopted I have no desire. My boyfriend keeps pressuring me to find them, but I have no desire. My family and my parents are the people who adopted me, raised me, loved me, fed me, cared for me, took care of me when I was sick, called me their child, not their "adopted" child...that is my family. I love my biological parents for giving me life and giving me to a wonderful, loving family...MY REAL FAMILY.

My sister met with her biological mother. She met her half-brothers and sisters.

Ireneparalegal · 05-11-2006, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

Being adopted I have no desire. My boyfriend keeps pressuring me to find them, but I have no desire. My family and my parents are the people who adopted me, raised me, loved me, fed me, cared for me, took care of me when I was sick, called me their child, not their "adopted" child...that is my family. I love my biological parents for giving me life and giving me to a wonderful, loving family...MY REAL FAMILY.

My sister met with her biological mother. She met her half-brothers and sisters.

To all the ladies out there who gave up their children to loving homes...THANK YOU! You deserve a special thanx on MOTHERS DAY!!!!!!

Rachel3118 · 05-11-2006, 05:40 PM

I don't think I would try to find them but I don't really know what I would do.

KristinHerreraFan · 05-11-2006, 06:46 PM

It wont make a difference either way.

A Mother who is a person who's cared for you, loved you and has stuck by your side for your life, regardless if it is your "real" Mother or not, they all mean the same and give you the exact same love, your mother doesn't have to be your natural mother to be your real mother, if she gives you love and caring, than she IS a real mother.

AB · 03-07-2007, 08:39 PM

My husbands mother gave up her 5th child, she was going through a divorce
and had an affair with a fellow from work and got pregnant. Since she already had four kids between the ages of 2 & 10 she didn't think she could
handle another baby. This was kept a secret for many years until the adopted
daughter called out of the blue in 1992. My mother-in-law was very upset
that all this came out and she will not have anything to do with the adopted
daughter. My husband and one of his brothers go to visit her every so often
and they have a good relationship, but the other brother & sister won't have
much to do with her. She seems very nice and even favors my mother-in-law
in looks & speech. But this adoption issue can really be hard on everyone involved and it doesn't always go the way you'd like it to.

Janice · 03-07-2007, 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by annball1957

My husbands mother gave up her 5th child, she was going through a divorce
and had an affair with a fellow from work and got pregnant. Since she already had four kids between the ages of 2 & 10 she didn't think she could
handle another baby. This was kept a secret for many years until the adopted
daughter called out of the blue in 1992. My mother-in-law was very upset
that all this came out and she will not have anything to do with the adopted
daughter. My husband and one of his brothers go to visit her every so often
and they have a good relationship, but the other brother & sister won't have
much to do with her. She seems very nice and even favors my mother-in-law
in looks & speech. But this adoption issue can really be hard on everyone involved and it doesn't always go the way you'd like it to.

That's true. Not every biological parent wants to be found. We see all the happy and tearful reunions on talk shows, but you make an excellent point. These stories don't always have happy endings.

Brad Russ · 03-07-2007, 10:32 PM

It's hard to know the answer to that, since I'm not in that situation. Knowing my personality though, I'm guessing I probably wouldn't have much of a desire to meet them. I think seeing their pictures, and maybe finding out why they gave me up, would probably be enough for me. Like I said though, who really knows how I'd react. For all I know, my feelings could be the exact opposite if I were in that situation, so really I don't know for sure what I'd do.

Jrnygrl · 03-07-2007, 11:12 PM

I really wouldn't see any reason to unless for some medical reason.

catlover79 · 03-07-2007, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jrnygrl

I really wouldn't see any reason to unless for some medical reason.

I am also a person with a lot of curiousity and tenacity, so something tells me I'd want to solve the puzzle and find out as much as I could. Still I wouldn't want to hurt the people who raised me. Tough questions! I'm glad that I'm not in that kind of situation.

05-07-2006, 10:26 PM	#1
Howdoulikemenow333 I'M having a bad day Senior Member Join Date: Jul 05, 2003 Location: Later Posts: 1,263	If you were adopted, would you look for your real mother? Would you meet? What if you were adopit,would you find your birth monter even though she may be on this earth any more. This really happen I changed the names to protect the people in thisstory. This happen in Anchorage,Alaska a sixteen year old girl name Nellie was seduced by this army she found out that she was goingto have a baby. When the baby was born she was 17,but she did not see the baby the Chathloic service took the baby away. That's how they did it if you were a teen ager. Now this women is dead and her sister is trying to look for the boy which he is 24 now. Would you want your monther to find you,but now she died and her sister wants to find you? And what do you think about taking babies away from there monters when there 16,17. Did they have the right to do it, liek I said back in the 60's 50's they did it differn'et then we do now about taking babies aweay from un wed teen monthers or do they?
	__________________ I I think I'm going crazy...Oh wait a minute I am crazy.....Crazy like a fox.

05-07-2006, 11:29 PM	#2
Mr. Television 23 Years at Sitcoms Online Forum Icon Join Date: Jun 06, 2003 Location: Somewhere you're Not Posts: 62,132	If I was adopted I'd want to know.
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05-08-2006, 10:11 PM	#6
TheHappyBurgerMeister Member Senior Member Join Date: Jul 23, 2002 Location: Wisconsin, USA Posts: 2,209	I think I would definitely want to find my birth mother. But first I would talk about it with my adoptive parents and see how they feel about it; hoping they would support me. My neighbor was adopted and for years she didn't know her birth mother. Then when she was around 21, I believe, her birth mother wanted to find HER. She gave birth to her when she was a teenager. She didn't want to meet her at first, but then she decided to. Since then she's been reunited with her real mom, her half sisters, and the rest of her family. And of course she has a parents that raised her and her adoptive siblings. It seems kind of weird that she has 2 moms now. She refers to her biological mom and family her "other family". She's 34 now and her and her husband are expecting their first baby.
	__________________ Kristina Thinkin' 'Bout Something Official Music Video Shout it Out- Hanson's 5th studio album in stores June 8th!

05-08-2006, 10:54 PM	#7
Ireneparalegal LEGAL SPICE ;) Forum Legend Join Date: Jul 25, 2005 Location: OXNARD, CA - WHERE THE DALLAS COWBOYS TRAIN & PRACTICE Posts: 38,691	Being adopted I have no desire. My boyfriend keeps pressuring me to find them, but I have no desire. My family and my parents are the people who adopted me, raised me, loved me, fed me, cared for me, took care of me when I was sick, called me their child, not their "adopted" child...that is my family. I love my biological parents for giving me life and giving me to a wonderful, loving family...MY REAL FAMILY. My sister met with her biological mother. She met her half-brothers and sisters.
	__________________ DALLAS COWBOYS ARE HERE AT TRAINING CAMP!!!

05-11-2006, 05:40 PM	#9
Rachel3118 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 13, 2005 Posts: 1,768	I don't think I would try to find them but I don't really know what I would do.
	__________________ Rachel

05-08-2006, 03:39 AM	#3
dawsongirl Member Forum Icon Join Date: Jan 04, 2001 Posts: 53,140	I can't really say either way. This is one of those hypotheticals I can't answer unless I was in the situation.

05-08-2006, 08:38 PM	#4
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	My gut tells me no. If I found out I was adopted when my parents were alive, I wouldn't want to hurt them. I felt too "theirs" anyway. If I found out this minute, I still say no. My parents are my parents. It's hard to explain, and like Cathy points out, a person would have to be in that position to really know what they would do.

05-08-2006, 09:35 PM	#5
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	My parents said they found me when I was six months old being raised by wolves.

05-11-2006, 06:46 PM	#10
KristinHerreraFan Dana is Buena Senior Member Join Date: Jan 16, 2005 Location: Jacksonville, FL Posts: 2,791	It wont make a difference either way. A Mother who is a person who's cared for you, loved you and has stuck by your side for your life, regardless if it is your "real" Mother or not, they all mean the same and give you the exact same love, your mother doesn't have to be your natural mother to be your real mother, if she gives you love and caring, than she IS a real mother.
	__________________ Signed, >>>>Kristin Herrera Fan

03-07-2007, 08:39 PM	#11
AB Member Eternal Member Forum Icon Join Date: Dec 26, 2006 Location: The South Posts: 59,428	My husbands mother gave up her 5th child, she was going through a divorce and had an affair with a fellow from work and got pregnant. Since she already had four kids between the ages of 2 & 10 she didn't think she could handle another baby. This was kept a secret for many years until the adopted daughter called out of the blue in 1992. My mother-in-law was very upset that all this came out and she will not have anything to do with the adopted daughter. My husband and one of his brothers go to visit her every so often and they have a good relationship, but the other brother & sister won't have much to do with her. She seems very nice and even favors my mother-in-law in looks & speech. But this adoption issue can really be hard on everyone involved and it doesn't always go the way you'd like it to.

03-07-2007, 10:32 PM	#13
Brad Russ Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 17, 2002 Location: Portland, Oregon Posts: 10,085	It's hard to know the answer to that, since I'm not in that situation. Knowing my personality though, I'm guessing I probably wouldn't have much of a desire to meet them. I think seeing their pictures, and maybe finding out why they gave me up, would probably be enough for me. Like I said though, who really knows how I'd react. For all I know, my feelings could be the exact opposite if I were in that situation, so really I don't know for sure what I'd do.
	__________________ St. John 15:13 - Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Currently my favorite song.

03-07-2007, 11:12 PM	#14
Jrnygrl Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 03, 2003 Location: wheel in the sky Posts: 4,540	I really wouldn't see any reason to unless for some medical reason.