If you are Upset about something, does a person trying to Cheer you up make you - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

TVFactFan · 03-12-2006, 02:39 PM

more UPSET? The worst thing a person can ever do is try and make me see the bright side of something when I expressing howe mad I am about something. I want the person to just listen and understand WHY I'm angry. But trying to cheer me up gives off the vibe that they don't care why you are upset . Anyone Agree?

Ireneparalegal · 03-12-2006, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TVResearcher

more UPSET? The worst thing a person can ever do is try and make me see the bright side of something when I expressing howe mad I am about something. I want the person to just listen and understand WHY I'm angry. But trying to cheer me up gives off the vibe that they don't care why you are upset . Anyone Agree?

I so agree. I have told my man so many times (he finally gets it now) that when I am feeling at my lowest, or angry, I just need to vent, and if he wants to do anything to make me feel better, JUST HUG ME. Don't say anything, don't try to cheer me up, just give me a hug and let me know you understand how I feel. Men tend to want to be "fixers" and try to fix every single problem. women just like to vent, and other women will LISTEN. which is what men AREN'T TAUGHT early enough to understand.

Chad Michael Murray · 03-12-2006, 03:49 PM

It depends. If I'm in an angry mood, somebody trying to cheer me up is usually a good thing. But if I'm sad or really upset, sometimes it does worse. Like, say somebody very close to you died. Although you're mourning, usually you can at least contain yourself if people leave you alone. But having people say "Oh I'm sorry" or "Are you okay?" 500 times is what MAKES you even more upset.

It's like when a kid falls down the stairs and they're fine, but then the mother is like "OMG BILLY COME HERE ARE YOU OKAY?!" and then the kid starts screaming his head off.

Brieannas21 · 03-12-2006, 04:39 PM

It all depends on how mad I am. But I'm the type of person who'll try to cheer a person up if they are having a hard time or if they are mad about something.

Moonlight Lady · 03-12-2006, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TVResearcher

more UPSET? The worst thing a person can ever do is try and make me see the bright side of something when I expressing howe mad I am about something. I want the person to just listen and understand WHY I'm angry. But trying to cheer me up gives off the vibe that they don't care why you are upset . Anyone Agree?

Yeah, I do. I prefer if they just listen or leave me alone until i'm ready to talk about it.

TheGenius · 03-12-2006, 04:55 PM

Yeah if I'm that pissed off usually just tryin to bring up the bright side isn't gonna make me feel better but thats not to say people can't cheer me up. Sometimes female friends don't gotta use words to cheer me up when I'm in a bad mood

TVFactFan · 03-12-2006, 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by evilNpunk

Im like the majority, I like someone to listen, not to try to make me feel better. Im looking for comfort, and feeding me BS trying to make me feel better just makes it uncomfortable.

My mom is famous for that which led to many hangups-lol

Tuesday Weld · 03-12-2006, 07:09 PM

It depends - if it seems sincere, than I appreciate it. If it seems fake and put-on, then no, I don't like that.

swedeace · 03-12-2006, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TVResearcher

more UPSET? The worst thing a person can ever do is try and make me see the bright side of something when I expressing howe mad I am about something. I want the person to just listen and understand WHY I'm angry. But trying to cheer me up gives off the vibe that they don't care why you are upset . Anyone Agree?

I agree with you here. Another thing that annoys me as well is when I am throwing a pity party for myself, I tend to get "compliments" like, "Don't worry. You will get what you deserve because you are a good person." There are just sooooooo many things I disagree with in that sentence that I could always rebel against, and I have done it at times. I mean, I don't throw pity parties for myself JUST to get "cheerful" comments. I do it because I am expressing my feelings/emotions in a realistic manner. I mean, that's life, and I am aware of it. I guess like you I just want to be "heard" and not necessarily always given advice during these unnecessary times.

Number 9 Dream · 03-12-2006, 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by evilNpunk

Im like the majority, I like someone to listen, not to try to make me feel better. Im looking for comfort, and feeding me BS trying to make me feel better just makes it uncomfortable.

I can be the same way too. I also agree that if someone is genuinely being sincere then it'll make me feel better. It really depends on the situation, I guess. Most of the time, though, I just want someone to vent with me or be a good listener.

TVFactFan · 03-12-2006, 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Number 9 Dream

I can be the same way too. I also agree that if someone is genuinely being sincere then it'll make me feel better. It really depends on the situation, I guess. Most of the time, though, I just want someone to vent with me or be a good listener.

That's exactly what someone is supposed to do, VENT WITH YOU. That makes me feel so much better

dawsongirl · 03-12-2006, 11:29 PM

About 50% of the time. In those cases, I'd just prefer to stay pissed off.

Brian Damage · 03-12-2006, 11:38 PM

If someone is mad, I'll let them vent. When my kids are sad though, I always try to cheer them up by tickling them or telling them a joke. I can't stand to see my children sad.

dawsongirl · 03-12-2006, 11:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brian Damage

If someone is mad, I'll let them vent. When my kids are sad though, I always try to cheer them up by tickling them or telling them a joke. I can't stand to see my children sad.

Yeah, my mom is usually the one trying to cheer me up.

Brad Russ · 03-13-2006, 04:46 AM

It all depends on the situation really, but for the most part I agree with you. If you're a woman, just give me a hug, and listen to me. If you're a guy, please don't hug me, but be quiet and listen. Just because someone is complaining about things, doesn't necessarily mean they're wanting your advice, they're usually just looking for a friend to vent to. I do like it however when friends give comforting words, but if they're trying to lecture me when I'm feeling this way, they're just making the situation worse.

03-12-2006, 02:39 PM	#1
TVFactFan Member Forum Junkie Join Date: Aug 17, 2002 Posts: 98,950	If you are Upset about something, does a person trying to Cheer you up make you more UPSET? The worst thing a person can ever do is try and make me see the bright side of something when I expressing howe mad I am about something. I want the person to just listen and understand WHY I'm angry. But trying to cheer me up gives off the vibe that they don't care why you are upset . Anyone Agree?

03-12-2006, 03:49 PM	#3
Chad Michael Murray Member Senior Member Join Date: Oct 23, 2005 Location: Illinois Posts: 1,493	It depends. If I'm in an angry mood, somebody trying to cheer me up is usually a good thing. But if I'm sad or really upset, sometimes it does worse. Like, say somebody very close to you died. Although you're mourning, usually you can at least contain yourself if people leave you alone. But having people say "Oh I'm sorry" or "Are you okay?" 500 times is what MAKES you even more upset. It's like when a kid falls down the stairs and they're fine, but then the mother is like "OMG BILLY COME HERE ARE YOU OKAY?!" and then the kid starts screaming his head off.
	__________________ "I think that I’m definitely connected to my sensitive side. I pretty much wear my emotions on my sleeves for the people in my life." --Chad Michael Murray

03-12-2006, 07:09 PM	#8
Tuesday Weld I missed you all. hugs Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 02, 2003 Location: Having a great time. Posts: 22,285	It depends - if it seems sincere, than I appreciate it. If it seems fake and put-on, then no, I don't like that.
	__________________ Cindy Formerly musicrocksmyworld, ElvisDustyfan and vintagetvgirl. After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say "I want to see the manager." - William S. Burroughs

03-12-2006, 11:38 PM	#13
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,108	If someone is mad, I'll let them vent. When my kids are sad though, I always try to cheer them up by tickling them or telling them a joke. I can't stand to see my children sad.
	__________________ The Key to the Kingdom of Heaven: John 3:3 *Money Doesn't Buy Happiness...But I'd Rather Cry in My Private Jet*

03-13-2006, 04:46 AM	#15
Brad Russ Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 17, 2002 Location: Portland, Oregon Posts: 10,085	It all depends on the situation really, but for the most part I agree with you. If you're a woman, just give me a hug, and listen to me. If you're a guy, please don't hug me, but be quiet and listen. Just because someone is complaining about things, doesn't necessarily mean they're wanting your advice, they're usually just looking for a friend to vent to. I do like it however when friends give comforting words, but if they're trying to lecture me when I'm feeling this way, they're just making the situation worse.
	__________________ St. John 15:13 - Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Currently my favorite song.

03-12-2006, 04:39 PM	#4
Brieannas21 Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 05, 2004 Location: Texas Posts: 9,792	It all depends on how mad I am. But I'm the type of person who'll try to cheer a person up if they are having a hard time or if they are mad about something.

03-12-2006, 04:55 PM	#6
TheGenius Banned Banned!! Frequent Poster Join Date: Feb 24, 2006 Posts: 189	Yeah if I'm that pissed off usually just tryin to bring up the bright side isn't gonna make me feel better but thats not to say people can't cheer me up. Sometimes female friends don't gotta use words to cheer me up when I'm in a bad mood

03-12-2006, 11:29 PM	#12
dawsongirl Member Forum Icon Join Date: Jan 04, 2001 Posts: 53,128	About 50% of the time. In those cases, I'd just prefer to stay pissed off.