is this so wrong? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Michael [hXc] · 01-07-2006, 11:34 AM

i was on another message board, and i know this woman on it who i am assuming is in her thirties. and i talked to her for a while and then when she found out i am 14, she was all like "i can't have a friendship with a child who is underage, it's against the law and socially wrong". is it so wrong for an adult online to talk to a child? it's not like we planned to meet in real life or anything, what is the big deal?

swedeace · 01-07-2006, 12:03 PM

It's understandable in both sides.

If she tells people she is befriending a 14-year-old, she may be worried by the fact that society will down on her as a whole and mock her. People may start to tell her, "Geez, you can only make friends with young teens? What's wrong with you that you can't even make friends your own age?" That would be my guess, but I cannot speak for her.

Unfortunately, society does put these kinds of rules and strains on the people within society.

In my opinion, friendships are quite unique and can surprise people.

rjb182 · 01-07-2006, 12:03 PM

Depends on the kind of friendship. Maybe she had in mind something more than "just friends" until she found out your age.

G-Force Glockstar · 01-07-2006, 12:06 PM

I think it's fine as long as you don't plan to meet or anything

Brian Damage · 01-07-2006, 12:10 PM

I can't blame her all that much. People could take it the wrong way if they found out a 30 year old was chatting with a 14 year old. Especially now a days with teachers sleeping with students and all.

EmoJoe · 01-07-2006, 12:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brian Damage

I can't blame her all that much. People could take it the wrong way if they found out a 30 year old was chatting with a 14 year old. Especially now a days with teachers sleeping with students and all.

Agreed

Michael [hXc] · 01-07-2006, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rjb182

Depends on the kind of friendship. Maybe she had in mind something more than "just friends" until she found out your age.

i was thinking it was that. because then she was implying she needs a man to talk to, and not a child. but she didn't think i act my age. i guess if she can't accept being friends with me for who i am, she is a ****ty friend anyway. but i doubt she'd go around saying she is friends with a 14 year old. if i told my friends i talk to a 30 year old, they'd say "wtf ur crazy" or "u got problems".

Hollow · 01-07-2006, 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AgEnT FaLLoN*

if i told my friends i talk to a 30 year old, they'd say "wtf ur crazy" or "u got problems".

i've thought about that too. but frankly there's nothing wrong with friendships between adults and adolescents on the internet. this board mostly full of teenagers with a few people in their middle ages who chat with us just as regularly, i haven't seen anyone complain about it. many adults here have condoled and helped me with crises i've been through.

Dutabi84 · 01-07-2006, 04:28 PM

I guess I don't really see the problem with having friendly conversations with such an age gap. She must have been weirded out by finding out how young you are, and also concerned about the recent breakout of crackdowns on adults hooking up with children on the internet. Not that it's anything that she intended, but you can never be too careful.

Mijada · 01-07-2006, 04:34 PM

I agree with what Brian Damage said. Don't take it personally Mike. She's only trying to protect herself and you as well.

Michael [hXc] · 01-07-2006, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by safety pin

i've thought about that too. but frankly there's nothing wrong with friendships between adults and adolescents on the internet. this board mostly full of teenagers with a few people in their middle ages who chat with us just as regularly, i haven't seen anyone complain about it. many adults here have condoled and helped me with crises i've been through.

i agree too. but truthfully she doesn't even believe i am 14 but the idea scares her so much that she doesn't feel comfortable talking to me. i don't get it but i think she is too hooked into the whole overage/underage thing.

Fonzarelli · 01-07-2006, 05:11 PM

You're 14? I thought you were much older (that's a compliment!). I think IRL it's weird, but I don't see the problem when it's on an Internet message board.

Michael [hXc] · 01-07-2006, 05:30 PM

thanks.

yeah i'm 14. the only thing is how this woman i am referring to, originally told me she was in her 20s. and i always said my real age.

Parakeet03 · 01-07-2006, 05:35 PM

I think its fine for people who dont know each other and are far apart in age to just talk online. Its nothing unless u give out personal info.

KristinHerreraFan · 01-07-2006, 07:33 PM

JUST ONE COLOR PICKIN MINUTE!!

My best friend Elena is 31 years old, and we are really close, we met eachother on the facts of life board, and we talk online a lot, she's very nice.
We both love facts of life. I warned her on our first chat that I am only 16, she said she has no problem, because the age doesn't matter if you are really good friends

And I agree, in my opinion, that woman was just being a *beep*

01-07-2006, 11:34 AM	#1
Michael [hXc] dying. Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 29, 2004 Posts: 8,532	is this so wrong? i was on another message board, and i know this woman on it who i am assuming is in her thirties. and i talked to her for a while and then when she found out i am 14, she was all like "i can't have a friendship with a child who is underage, it's against the law and socially wrong". is it so wrong for an adult online to talk to a child? it's not like we planned to meet in real life or anything, what is the big deal?

01-07-2006, 12:03 PM	#3
rjb182 Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Dec 26, 2005 Location: Cape Cod, MA Posts: 97	Depends on the kind of friendship. Maybe she had in mind something more than "just friends" until she found out your age.
	__________________ These Crazy Games: An exceedingly random sports blog

01-07-2006, 12:06 PM	#4
G-Force Glockstar Member Forum Celebrity Join Date: Nov 22, 2003 Posts: 21,770	I think it's fine as long as you don't plan to meet or anything
	__________________ Formally, FullHouseFan8795, CamdenGirl89, Lana Lang, Ruthie Lang, CravinForCarrie, and Girl Meets World.

01-07-2006, 12:10 PM	#5
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	I can't blame her all that much. People could take it the wrong way if they found out a 30 year old was chatting with a 14 year old. Especially now a days with teachers sleeping with students and all.
	__________________ The Key to the Kingdom of Heaven: John 3:3 *Money Doesn't Buy Happiness...But I'd Rather Cry in My Private Jet*

01-07-2006, 04:34 PM	#10
Mijada Spencers mom Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 02, 2001 Location: eastern US Posts: 4,093	I agree with what Brian Damage said. Don't take it personally Mike. She's only trying to protect herself and you as well.
	__________________ Proud mom to Spencer, Justine and Colleen

01-07-2006, 12:03 PM	#2
swedeace Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 22, 2003 Posts: 9,009	It's understandable in both sides. If she tells people she is befriending a 14-year-old, she may be worried by the fact that society will down on her as a whole and mock her. People may start to tell her, "Geez, you can only make friends with young teens? What's wrong with you that you can't even make friends your own age?" That would be my guess, but I cannot speak for her. Unfortunately, society does put these kinds of rules and strains on the people within society. In my opinion, friendships are quite unique and can surprise people.

01-07-2006, 04:28 PM	#9
Dutabi84 kittens must die Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 22, 2003 Location: MN/TX Posts: 11,026	I guess I don't really see the problem with having friendly conversations with such an age gap. She must have been weirded out by finding out how young you are, and also concerned about the recent breakout of crackdowns on adults hooking up with children on the internet. Not that it's anything that she intended, but you can never be too careful.

01-07-2006, 05:11 PM	#12
Fonzarelli Member Senior Member Join Date: Jan 19, 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 1,996	You're 14? I thought you were much older (that's a compliment!). I think IRL it's weird, but I don't see the problem when it's on an Internet message board.
	__________________ Dennis Kucinich '08!

01-07-2006, 05:30 PM	#13
Michael [hXc] dying. Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 29, 2004 Posts: 8,532	thanks. yeah i'm 14. the only thing is how this woman i am referring to, originally told me she was in her 20s. and i always said my real age.

01-07-2006, 05:35 PM	#14
Parakeet03 :-) Forum Veteran Join Date: Jan 04, 2004 Location: does it matter? Posts: 6,809	I think its fine for people who dont know each other and are far apart in age to just talk online. Its nothing unless u give out personal info.
	__________________ a long december and there's reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last i can't remember the last thing that you said as you were leaving now the days go by so fast

01-07-2006, 07:33 PM	#15
KristinHerreraFan Dana is Buena Senior Member Join Date: Jan 16, 2005 Location: Jacksonville, FL Posts: 2,791	JUST ONE COLOR PICKIN MINUTE!! My best friend Elena is 31 years old, and we are really close, we met eachother on the facts of life board, and we talk online a lot, she's very nice. We both love facts of life. I warned her on our first chat that I am only 16, she said she has no problem, because the age doesn't matter if you are really good friends And I agree, in my opinion, that woman was just being a beep
	__________________ Signed, >>>>Kristin Herrera Fan