Ladies, what does it mean. And how shall I proceed? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Max Whittaker · 12-04-2005, 07:01 PM

On friday I was at a book store. I ran into this girl I knew from work. Turns out she has been working at the book store.

Since she was on-duty at the time, she couldn't talk long, but she suggested we exchange numbers so that we could "hang out".

In the time I've known her, we've probably shared only three conversations, total, due to the difference in our work activities and locations. I would not mind getting to know her better, especially in a non-work setting. But I'd like to know what to expect, and what's expected of me.

So I wonder if "hang out" means "hang out"; or something more. She asked me to call her. I honestly don't know what to say. I don't know what kind of person she is or what she'd like to do. Books come to mind, but she has likely had her fill of books after work.

There are events of interest going on, of course, what with the holidays and all. Is it prudent to go with friends? No pressure? Or just a one-on-one outing?

And of course, I'm not sure I want a girl-friend at this time. So much is going on at work, I don't need distractions. I love to make friends. But if she wants something more, things could get complicated. Athough I won't deny she is attractive...

I'm not sure how coherent any of this is. Kinda babbling. Oh, well. I sent the story into cyberspace. I'll see what happens...

Nighthawk76 · 12-04-2005, 07:17 PM

I know that you wanted a female's advice and I can't help you there but my advice is to get together with her for a movie or something and then just see where it leads you.

Max Whittaker · 12-04-2005, 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimmy Malone

I know that you wanted a female's advice and I can't help you there but my advice is to get together with her for a movie or something and then just see where it leads you.

Thanks. Honestly, I don't care where the advice comes from. If it helps make my holiday a little less "ohmygodwhatamigoingtodo", I'd appreciate it.

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 12-04-2005, 08:22 PM

Coming from a girl, I think she wants to hang out as friends, and then if you two seem to hit it off, should see what happens. So unless she was acting all flirty or dropping little hints, I think shed like to keep it pretty platonic- but things could happen and you two might be a good couple! Id call her.

Max Whittaker · 12-04-2005, 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ¤I Love Clay Aiken¤

Coming from a girl, I think she wants to hang out as friends, and then if you two seem to hit it off, should see what happens. So unless she was acting all flirty or dropping little hints, I think shed like to keep it pretty platonic- but things could happen and you two might be a good couple! Id call her.

There is a Christmas parade on sunday. My family will be visiting, and may very well be going with me. Is that an appropriate first-friendly outing?

rusyd · 12-04-2005, 08:42 PM

She gave you her phone # so she must want to be with you in one way or another,friends or more, I don' know. Go out w her and see what happens.

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 12-04-2005, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Max Whittaker

There is a Christmas parade on sunday. My family will be visiting, and may very well be going with me. Is that an appropriate first-friendly outing?

I think so. Its a parade so its not like you have to go out to dinner or whatever and have akward moments of silence. I think going to the parade will more comfortable to get to know eachother.

Jonathan · 12-04-2005, 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimmy Malone

I know that you wanted a female's advice and I can't help you there but my advice is to get together with her for a movie or something and then just see where it leads you.

Exactly, summed up very nicely.

swedeace · 12-04-2005, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Max Whittaker

On friday I was at a book store. I ran into this girl I knew from work. Turns out she has been working at the book store. Since she was on-duty at the time, she couldn't talk long, but she suggested we exchange numbers so that we could "hang out".

Mmmm... yeah, she is interested in you - be it as friends or more, but she just wants to talk/get to know you more.

Quote:

There are events of interest going on, of course, what with the holidays and all. Is it prudent to go with friends? No pressure? Or just a one-on-one outing?

I say go on a friend date with your friends ONLY if you are comfortable in doing so. Or, you may even wanna try both things. One alone and then on a group outing. Decide what is best for you.

Quote:

I'm not sure how coherent any of this is. Kinda babbling. Oh, well. I sent the story into cyberspace. I'll see what happens...

Hmmmm... okay, here goes. She gave you her contact info, so now the ball is in your court. She wants you to contact her. It doesn't really matter whether you know much about her or not, but it does matter that she wants to get to know you more. Just call her and see if you two can go out for coffee or have a light lunch. Either way, this is a perfect opportunity to just talk and see what happens from there.

Quote:

So I wonder if "hang out" means "hang out"; or something more. She asked me to call her. I honestly don't know what to say. I don't know what kind of person she is or what she'd like to do. Books come to mind, but she has likely had her fill of books after work.

It's hard to decipher for us since we were not there to observe non-verbals. However, I would say just go hang out and take it from there.

Quote:

In the time I've known her, we've probably shared only three conversations, total, due to the difference in our work activities and locations. I would not mind getting to know her better, especially in a non-work setting. But I'd like to know what to expect, and what's expected of me.

You said you didn't know what to talk about/what things you have in common/expected of you, but this is how it begins. She is probably just expecting to find out more about you too. One important thing I found is a wonderful, instinctive talent we all hold: listening skills. You don't have to be a perfect listener, but just actually LISTEN to what she is saying. Just listen to what she is saying and then reciprocate the conversation flow. I did this with a current friend (I originally approached him because he was a MAJOR crush), so I had NO idea what he liked, did for a living, etc, but I just began the flow of conversation starting with the computer work he was working on. Then, we just flowed from conversation to conversation. This is really the only way to start the conversation engine going - by adding fuel to it.

Quote:

And of course, I'm not sure I want a girl-friend at this time. So much is going on at work, I don't need distractions. I love to make friends. But if she wants something more, things could get complicated. Athough I won't deny she is attractive...

You say you are not interested in having a girlfriend. That's fine. Just talk and then become a friend to her. She may be a good/best friend to you or even more in the future. Only later on will you two know what you two will want for the future. Just take it one step at a time and just BE a friend first and above all.

So take this opportunity, even if it just to be friends.

I am no pro, by any means. However, I did take the "listening" skills very seriously and actually listened. It really worked to find info to use in conversation flows. Good luck!!

Max Whittaker · 12-04-2005, 10:48 PM

Alright. I'll call her. It could be fun.

Nighthawk76 · 12-04-2005, 10:53 PM

I just wish I could get a date.

It has been five years since I've been on one.

Max Whittaker · 12-04-2005, 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimmy Malone

I just wish I could get a date.

It has been five years since I've been on one.

20 years for me. No worries!

dawsongirl · 12-04-2005, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimmy Malone

I just wish I could get a date.

It has been five years since I've been on one.

Hmm...10 for me. But that date STUNK, so I'll just stick with 26 years.

Dutabi84 · 12-05-2005, 12:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Max Whittaker

20 years for me. No worries!

21 here, not counting that evil, twisted, fallacious girl I wasted too much time on earlier this year.

The Chauffeur · 12-05-2005, 12:29 AM

I can't even remember the last time I had a date

12-04-2005, 07:01 PM	#1
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	Ladies, what does it mean. And how shall I proceed? On friday I was at a book store. I ran into this girl I knew from work. Turns out she has been working at the book store. Since she was on-duty at the time, she couldn't talk long, but she suggested we exchange numbers so that we could "hang out". In the time I've known her, we've probably shared only three conversations, total, due to the difference in our work activities and locations. I would not mind getting to know her better, especially in a non-work setting. But I'd like to know what to expect, and what's expected of me. So I wonder if "hang out" means "hang out"; or something more. She asked me to call her. I honestly don't know what to say. I don't know what kind of person she is or what she'd like to do. Books come to mind, but she has likely had her fill of books after work. There are events of interest going on, of course, what with the holidays and all. Is it prudent to go with friends? No pressure? Or just a one-on-one outing? And of course, I'm not sure I want a girl-friend at this time. So much is going on at work, I don't need distractions. I love to make friends. But if she wants something more, things could get complicated. Athough I won't deny she is attractive... I'm not sure how coherent any of this is. Kinda babbling. Oh, well. I sent the story into cyberspace. I'll see what happens...
	__________________ I will get things done for America – to make our people safer, smarter, & healthier. I will bring Americans together to strengthen our communities. Faced with apathy, I will take action. Faced with conflict, I will seek common ground. Faced with adversity, I will persevere. I will carry this commitment with me this year and beyond. I am an AmeriCorps member, and I will get things done.

12-04-2005, 08:22 PM	#4
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	Coming from a girl, I think she wants to hang out as friends, and then if you two seem to hit it off, should see what happens. So unless she was acting all flirty or dropping little hints, I think shed like to keep it pretty platonic- but things could happen and you two might be a good couple! Id call her.
	__________________ DAVID COOK FOR AMERICAN IDOL

12-05-2005, 12:29 AM	#15
The Chauffeur Good Evening... Senior Member Join Date: Jan 24, 2005 Location: Under the sun Posts: 2,866	I can't even remember the last time I had a date
	__________________ A.K.A...wynter72 "I got this whole thing worked out on a level that you wouldn't even BEGIN to understand baby. Ya see....This whole thing's a chess game, and this here Xerox machine's the POPE."

12-04-2005, 07:17 PM	#2
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	I know that you wanted a female's advice and I can't help you there but my advice is to get together with her for a movie or something and then just see where it leads you.

12-04-2005, 08:42 PM	#6
rusyd Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Mar 30, 2004 Posts: 13,505	She gave you her phone # so she must want to be with you in one way or another,friends or more, I don' know. Go out w her and see what happens.

12-04-2005, 10:48 PM	#10
Max Whittaker I want Serenity back Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 30, 2001 Posts: 6,180	Alright. I'll call her. It could be fun.

12-04-2005, 10:53 PM	#11
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	I just wish I could get a date. It has been five years since I've been on one.