Should bosses have a personal relationship with co-workers under them? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

GARFIELDKOOL · 10-19-2005, 02:50 PM

My supervisor and this co-worker have a personal relationship. My boss is a he and the worker is a she. I work directly with both of them and they are cool to work with. But I think they should leave that on the low. The boss is married with kids, and she is divorced with five kids. Every Monday I always hear about what they did that weekend. He really takes up with her kids. He took them to the wrestling matches and everything. He picks her up to and from work everyday. They are seen coming in together, which I think looks bad. He even let her borrow his car so she could tend to her appointments on company time! There are times where she asks for an unscheduled day off so she could tend to personal matters. You could tell he doesn't really like it, but he won't say no to her. And check this out, last week, she told me that he said he loves her. She doesn't know what to do because she wants friendship, she didn't want to lead him on. He even lends her money. So I don't think bosses should have personal relationships with co-workers, if they do, they should do a better job at concealing it.

Number 9 Dream · 10-19-2005, 02:56 PM

This definately doesn't sound good. Not only is it unprofessional ( like you said, it should be done discreetly), but he's also married. Doesn't seem right to me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GARFIELDKOOL

My supervisor and this co-worker have a personal relationship. My boss is a he and the worker is a she. I work directly with both of them and they are cool to work with. But I think they should leave that on the low. The boss is married with kids, and she is divorced with five kids. Every Monday I always hear about what they did that weekend. He really takes up with her kids. He took them to the wrestling matches and everything. He picks her up to and from work everyday. They are seen coming in together, which I think looks bad. He even let her borrow his car so she could tend to her appointments on company time! There are times where she asks for an unscheduled day off so she could tend to personal matters. You could tell he doesn't really like it, but he won't say no to her. And check this out, last week, she told me that he said he loves her. She doesn't know what to do because she wants friendship, she didn't want to lead him on. He even lends her money. So I don't think bosses should have personal relationships with co-workers, if they do, they should do a better job at concealing it.

MsOrange · 10-19-2005, 03:24 PM

as long as they pay good...

the dude's married... that's enough info for me to call this a bad choice on both parts

Ireneparalegal · 10-19-2005, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GARFIELDKOOL

My supervisor and this co-worker have a personal relationship. My boss is a he and the worker is a she. I work directly with both of them and they are cool to work with. But I think they should leave that on the low. The boss is married with kids, and she is divorced with five kids. Every Monday I always hear about what they did that weekend. He really takes up with her kids. He took them to the wrestling matches and everything. He picks her up to and from work everyday. They are seen coming in together, which I think looks bad. He even let her borrow his car so she could tend to her appointments on company time! There are times where she asks for an unscheduled day off so she could tend to personal matters. You could tell he doesn't really like it, but he won't say no to her. And check this out, last week, she told me that he said he loves her. She doesn't know what to do because she wants friendship, she didn't want to lead him on. He even lends her money. So I don't think bosses should have personal relationships with co-workers, if they do, they should do a better job at concealing it.

Hey Kool, is there someone above HIM that you can report this to? This is unprofessional, unethical, immoral and it will eventually get noticed by everyone else. Soon, the other employees will suffer because of this. She will get favored and others will resent this. Some will say to let the wife know "anonymously", some might say "pull the boss aside and let him know others know and it might get back to his wife" , etc. Whatever is done, I would try to speak to the person ABOVE the boss and let them know what is known abt the relationship. ASAP.

MsOrange · 10-19-2005, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

Whatever is done, I would try to speak to the person ABOVE the boss and let them know what is known abt the relationship. ASAP.

If it's affecting your work and the work of those around you, then yes, you should report it to the supervisor above the boss... but if the boss is as cool and nice to work w/ as you say he is, I think you should talk to the boss first before ratting him out.

BUT if this thing is not affecting your work in anyway, or the work of those around you, i say mind your own buisness and learn from his mistake.

Holly · 10-19-2005, 03:40 PM

That doesnt sound to good.. What if they ever break up or something? ..then what? ... ..

cralappyhappy4 · 10-19-2005, 04:22 PM

my one 19 year old manager tries to get with all the cashiers. he already dated one and then after they broke up she called off and he wrote her up because he hated her and then she quit and while she was quitting she told on his new girlfriend (another cashier) for giving stuff away for free because she hated her for being with the manager after they broke up. the new girl he's dating mysteriously got a week off after she was scheduled all these days to work and he was trying to give me and a bunch of other cashiers all her hours i was like HELL NO i aint workin that bitches hours. now i think he hates me so i better watch out

he's ugly as sin too i dont know why any of them are tryin to date him

GARFIELDKOOL · 10-19-2005, 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ireneparalegal

Hey Kool, is there someone above HIM that you can report this to? This is unprofessional, unethical, immoral and it will eventually get noticed by everyone else. Soon, the other employees will suffer because of this. She will get favored and others will resent this. Some will say to let the wife know "anonymously", some might say "pull the boss aside and let him know others know and it might get back to his wife" , etc. Whatever is done, I would try to speak to the person ABOVE the boss and let them know what is known abt the relationship. ASAP.

He does have superiors, but they won't do anything. He's the best supervisor they got.(We work in the mailroom in a law firm) But I couldn't do that to him. I like him personally and professionally, and what they do on the job does not affect me. My point is they shouldn't talk on the job what they do around others. Our receptionist for one hates the woman. She's ready to blow both of them in.

Ireneparalegal · 10-19-2005, 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GARFIELDKOOL

He does have superiors, but they won't do anything. He's the best supervisor they got.(We work in the mailroom in a law firm) But I couldn't do that to him. I like him personally and professionally, and what they do on the job does not affect me. My point is they shouldn't talk on the job what they do around others. Our receptionist for one hates the woman. She's ready to blow both of them in.

Then in that case, if he is cool with you and you like the guy, then take him aside and let him know what is happening. Let him know before someone calls the wife. Or gets a hold of his wife. Women, in general, will do something like send a letter, call the wife, something ANONYMOUSLY. Let him know that people don't like what's going on and that you just want to give him "heads up" on what others know.

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-19-2005, 11:42 PM

Doesnt the wife get suspicious where his husband his every weekend? Damn.

GARFIELDKOOL · 10-20-2005, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ¤I Love Clay Aiken¤

Doesnt the wife get suspicious where his husband his every weekend? Damn.

The thing is, him and his wife don't spend any time together. She coaches pop warner cheerleading for girls and spends time with the girls on weekends. In his own words, Him and his wife give each other space. The wife and the woman met at a cookout he had at his home in the summer.

Brian Damage · 10-20-2005, 11:19 AM

If it doesn't affect you, then just ignore it. It isn't anybody's business unless you are friends with the wife or something along those lines.

Janice · 10-20-2005, 12:05 PM

It's a dangerous situation all around. They could very well be having an emotional affair now, which is just as devastating to a person's marriage, and usually leads to a physical affair.

He's saying he loves her? What a mess.

The guy is spending his time with the wrong family if you ask me. Also, if the woman is getting preferential treatment at work, there are bound to be problems.

Moonlight Lady · 10-20-2005, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GARFIELDKOOL

He does have superiors, but they won't do anything. He's the best supervisor they got.(We work in the mailroom in a law firm) But I couldn't do that to him. I like him personally and professionally, and what they do on the job does not affect me. My point is they shouldn't talk on the job what they do around others.

I agree with you and you are really better off not reporting them. I think it would be more trouble than it's worth. If you had reported either one of them and they found out, it would make work
an extremely uncomfortable place to be.

Chelsea · 10-20-2005, 05:39 PM

...co-workers under them....as opposed to co-workers on top of them?

Seriously though, it's just a bad idea all around.

10-19-2005, 02:50 PM	#1
GARFIELDKOOL Member Forum Veteran Join Date: Sep 02, 2004 Location: Rochester, NY Posts: 7,204	Should bosses have a personal relationship with co-workers under them? My supervisor and this co-worker have a personal relationship. My boss is a he and the worker is a she. I work directly with both of them and they are cool to work with. But I think they should leave that on the low. The boss is married with kids, and she is divorced with five kids. Every Monday I always hear about what they did that weekend. He really takes up with her kids. He took them to the wrestling matches and everything. He picks her up to and from work everyday. They are seen coming in together, which I think looks bad. He even let her borrow his car so she could tend to her appointments on company time! There are times where she asks for an unscheduled day off so she could tend to personal matters. You could tell he doesn't really like it, but he won't say no to her. And check this out, last week, she told me that he said he loves her. She doesn't know what to do because she wants friendship, she didn't want to lead him on. He even lends her money. So I don't think bosses should have personal relationships with co-workers, if they do, they should do a better job at concealing it.

10-19-2005, 04:22 PM	#7
cralappyhappy4 GO STEELERS!!!! Frequent Poster Join Date: Jul 07, 2005 Location: Glassport, Pennsylvania Posts: 132	my one 19 year old manager tries to get with all the cashiers. he already dated one and then after they broke up she called off and he wrote her up because he hated her and then she quit and while she was quitting she told on his new girlfriend (another cashier) for giving stuff away for free because she hated her for being with the manager after they broke up. the new girl he's dating mysteriously got a week off after she was scheduled all these days to work and he was trying to give me and a bunch of other cashiers all her hours i was like HELL NO i aint workin that bitches hours. now i think he hates me so i better watch out he's ugly as sin too i dont know why any of them are tryin to date him
	__________________ www.myspace.com/cralappyhappy

10-19-2005, 11:42 PM	#10
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	Doesnt the wife get suspicious where his husband his every weekend? Damn.
	__________________ DAVID COOK FOR AMERICAN IDOL

10-20-2005, 11:19 AM	#12
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	If it doesn't affect you, then just ignore it. It isn't anybody's business unless you are friends with the wife or something along those lines.
	__________________ The Key to the Kingdom of Heaven: John 3:3 *Money Doesn't Buy Happiness...But I'd Rather Cry in My Private Jet*

10-20-2005, 05:39 PM	#15
Chelsea Semi-retired Forum Veteran Join Date: Jan 07, 2001 Location: Washington Posts: 5,727	...co-workers under them....as opposed to co-workers on top of them? Seriously though, it's just a bad idea all around.
	__________________ Chelsea Former Administrator, 2005-2012 Former Member, DVD Review Team, 2004-2010.

10-19-2005, 03:24 PM	#3
MsOrange Bringin' Sexy Back Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 27, 2004 Posts: 6,133	as long as they pay good... the dude's married... that's enough info for me to call this a bad choice on both parts

10-19-2005, 03:40 PM	#6
Holly I LOVE SUNSETS :) Forum Veteran Join Date: Jul 25, 2005 Location: Albany NY Posts: 5,748	That doesnt sound to good.. What if they ever break up or something? ..then what? ... ..

10-20-2005, 12:05 PM	#13
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	It's a dangerous situation all around. They could very well be having an emotional affair now, which is just as devastating to a person's marriage, and usually leads to a physical affair. He's saying he loves her? What a mess. The guy is spending his time with the wrong family if you ask me. Also, if the woman is getting preferential treatment at work, there are bound to be problems.