Is it wrong for teachers to play favorites? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Chocoholic · 09-13-2005, 04:56 PM

I've been working as a paraprofessional (teacher's aide) at an elementary schol for a little over a year now. (I help out with a couple of the SPED kids who can handle a regular classroom with minimal outside assistance.) I always told myself that I would never play favorites with the kids or have my "Teacher's pets". I believed in treating all the kids fairly. However, after working in the classroom setting for a full school year, I find that I can't help but have my favorite kids. A lot of the kids are absolutely wonderful. They obey rules, respect adults and other kids, do their work like they're supposed to, and never give us staff much trouble. On the other hand, there are the kids who are absolute brats. They sass the teachers, make fun of other kids, and never follow directions, obey rules, or do their work like they're supposed do. (If they're acting like this now, I can't wait to see what they'll be like as teenagers.) Talking to their parents usually doesn't help, since most of them think their children are 100% angels and WE are the ones with the problem. I find I totally favor the good kids and give them special priviledges and stuff, like stickers and extra recess. Is this wrong?

MsOrange · 09-13-2005, 04:57 PM

having a favorite is natural and bound to happen... it's wrong when it becomes obvious in the classroom and that "favorite" gets certain priviliges based souly on his position as "teacher's pet"

MsOrange · 09-13-2005, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homeriffic

I find I totally favor the good kids and give them special priviledges and stuff, like stickers and extra recess. Is this wrong?

when you save you give htem extra stuff, is it FOR something... like for good grades, for following rules, for something that ANY kid can obtain if he does that? or is it only because they are your favorite.

extra recess? i thought all the kids went at the same time and left at the same time.

consentida · 09-13-2005, 05:20 PM

I think it's wrong to favor certain students over the others because I'm sure the other students feel a certain amount of rejection and what not, especially younger kids.

I was always one of those students that teachers favored (mostly in high school) and it usually pissed off the other kids. But there was nothing I could do. It was all on the teacher. And once kids realize that, it might be hard for the teacher to gain respect from the other students.

It probably also creates an insecurity in other kids. I mean, some kids don't care whether the teacher likes them or not but the ones that do might feel as if they're not good enough or smart enough or whatever.

Also, it's a teacher's job to be fair. It doesn't matter whether you like certain kids or not, it's your job to make them feel like they can accomplish something and help them actually accomplish whatever goal is set for them. You have to make them feel like they're part of the class as a whole. I've seen teachers pay attention to one or two kids in a class and completely ignore the rest of them. That doesn't exactly set them up for success if they feel invisible in a classroom.

I think it's unhealthy for the favored kids as well. They get used to having certain privelages and being favored one year and the next they're ignored. It's not easy being so important to a teacher one year and then kind of being thrown to the side by another teacher the next year.

So, I personally think it's wrong. But it happens. It's probably not intentional. It's not something that most people set out to do. It just happens.

YoliUSA · 09-13-2005, 05:40 PM

I voted no. I have a teacher that used to ask me for a lot of favors and stuff and people used to tease me a lot.

Dean Winchester · 09-13-2005, 05:40 PM

god I hated my sixth grade teacher, she was a real bitch. She hated me (and even said so) because her cousin was one of my fellow classmates and he'd always picked on me.

Penny Lane · 09-13-2005, 07:41 PM

Well it was a long time ago but I remember feeling very inferior in high school because I was neither the cheerleader nor the rich kid. Teacher's, whether they know it or not ,can do a lot of emotional damage to a kid who is average or below average .I always felt that I was a nobody and it did do a lot of damage to my self confidence. I finally attained my self confidence after I married a really great guy and had children of my own. When one matures it makes all the difference in the world!

Superstar · 09-15-2005, 03:39 PM

I think teachers shouldn't play favorites but its natural I guess.

EmoJoe · 09-15-2005, 03:48 PM

Yeah I guess

Lee · 09-15-2005, 08:09 PM

In my opinion, it is always wrong for a teacher to play favorites. I myself was a victim of this back in Bluefield, West Virginia.

Hollow · 09-15-2005, 08:17 PM

it's natural to want to play favorites but it's wrong regardlessly.

*Pleasant Tomorrow* · 09-15-2005, 09:27 PM

I think that it is definately right to select degenerates over the smart children solely because they have washboard abs or a sparkling personality...that way they can get into an ivy league college and run our country one day.

AD FAN · 09-15-2005, 11:52 PM

i'm a counselor at a sports camp for girls from age 8 to 15. its not that we had favorites (well we kinda did, but didn't favor them during camp), but we did have a few that we did not like at all, either because they were brats or mean to the other campers.

Chocoholic · 09-16-2005, 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsOrange

when you save you give htem extra stuff, is it FOR something... like for good grades, for following rules, for something that ANY kid can obtain if he does that? or is it only because they are your favorite.

My school is very big on positive reinforcement. We often reward kids for things like being quiet in the hallways, getting work done on time, following the rules in the cafeteria and on the playground, and behaving in class. They get stickers and stuff and can earn things like an extra ten minutes at recess every so often, get out of homework for one night, a movie, and even a special lunch with the principal.

I will admit, there are a few kids I know who have really crappy, miserable home lives. These kids' stories would make your heart break.

I try to give these kids a little extra TLC and praise when I can. Then, there are the kids who seem to think it's their God-given right to bully and make fun of other kids. I hate to say it, but those kids are some of my least favorites. They're not from troubled homes either. These kids come from upper middle-class families. Talking to their parents about their kids' behavior doesn't seem to help much. They always come up with some lame excuse for their child. It's almost like they think their kids are entitled to disobey rules and hurt other kids.

I guess I can't really blame kids for their bad behavior. I believe it's up to the PARENTS to teach their kids what behavior is appropriate and what isn't.

View Poll Results: Should teachers play favorites with their students?
Yes. It's only natural to favor the kids who behave.	12	48.00%
No. All kids should be treated equally, no matter how good or bad their behavior is in class.	13	52.00%
Voters: 25. You may not vote on this poll

09-13-2005, 04:56 PM	#1
Chocoholic Member Forum Star Join Date: Dec 01, 2000 Location: Between a rock and a hard place. Posts: 11,235	Is it wrong for teachers to play favorites? I've been working as a paraprofessional (teacher's aide) at an elementary schol for a little over a year now. (I help out with a couple of the SPED kids who can handle a regular classroom with minimal outside assistance.) I always told myself that I would never play favorites with the kids or have my "Teacher's pets". I believed in treating all the kids fairly. However, after working in the classroom setting for a full school year, I find that I can't help but have my favorite kids. A lot of the kids are absolutely wonderful. They obey rules, respect adults and other kids, do their work like they're supposed to, and never give us staff much trouble. On the other hand, there are the kids who are absolute brats. They sass the teachers, make fun of other kids, and never follow directions, obey rules, or do their work like they're supposed do. (If they're acting like this now, I can't wait to see what they'll be like as teenagers.) Talking to their parents usually doesn't help, since most of them think their children are 100% angels and WE are the ones with the problem. I find I totally favor the good kids and give them special priviledges and stuff, like stickers and extra recess. Is this wrong?

09-13-2005, 05:40 PM	#5
YoliUSA Fan of the Classics Forum Veteran Join Date: Jun 13, 2002 Location: In a galaxy far, far away... Posts: 5,290	I voted no. I have a teacher that used to ask me for a lot of favors and stuff and people used to tease me a lot.
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09-13-2005, 07:41 PM	#7
Penny Lane Butter Pie Forum Icon Join Date: Jul 03, 2001 Location: Beneath the blue suburban skies Posts: 51,261	Well it was a long time ago but I remember feeling very inferior in high school because I was neither the cheerleader nor the rich kid. Teacher's, whether they know it or not ,can do a lot of emotional damage to a kid who is average or below average .I always felt that I was a nobody and it did do a lot of damage to my self confidence. I finally attained my self confidence after I married a really great guy and had children of my own. When one matures it makes all the difference in the world!
	__________________ Vulgarity is no substitute for wit- Lady Violet Crawley

09-15-2005, 03:48 PM	#9
EmoJoe Cool cool cool Forum Addict Join Date: Apr 23, 2004 Location: New Jersey Posts: 71,478	Yeah I guess
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09-13-2005, 04:57 PM	#2
MsOrange Bringin' Sexy Back Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 27, 2004 Posts: 6,133	having a favorite is natural and bound to happen... it's wrong when it becomes obvious in the classroom and that "favorite" gets certain priviliges based souly on his position as "teacher's pet"

09-13-2005, 05:20 PM	#4
consentida oh, you pretty things Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 21, 2002 Location: New York Posts: 3,841	I think it's wrong to favor certain students over the others because I'm sure the other students feel a certain amount of rejection and what not, especially younger kids. I was always one of those students that teachers favored (mostly in high school) and it usually pissed off the other kids. But there was nothing I could do. It was all on the teacher. And once kids realize that, it might be hard for the teacher to gain respect from the other students. It probably also creates an insecurity in other kids. I mean, some kids don't care whether the teacher likes them or not but the ones that do might feel as if they're not good enough or smart enough or whatever. Also, it's a teacher's job to be fair. It doesn't matter whether you like certain kids or not, it's your job to make them feel like they can accomplish something and help them actually accomplish whatever goal is set for them. You have to make them feel like they're part of the class as a whole. I've seen teachers pay attention to one or two kids in a class and completely ignore the rest of them. That doesn't exactly set them up for success if they feel invisible in a classroom. I think it's unhealthy for the favored kids as well. They get used to having certain privelages and being favored one year and the next they're ignored. It's not easy being so important to a teacher one year and then kind of being thrown to the side by another teacher the next year. So, I personally think it's wrong. But it happens. It's probably not intentional. It's not something that most people set out to do. It just happens.

09-13-2005, 05:40 PM	#6
Dean Winchester Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 28, 2003 Location: Louisville KY Posts: 14,803	god I hated my sixth grade teacher, she was a real bitch. She hated me (and even said so) because her cousin was one of my fellow classmates and he'd always picked on me.

09-15-2005, 03:39 PM	#8
Superstar Member Forum Icon Join Date: Dec 08, 2003 Posts: 63,316	I think teachers shouldn't play favorites but its natural I guess.

09-15-2005, 08:09 PM	#10
Lee veteran member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: May 23, 2001 Location: Pulaski, Tennessee Posts: 4,768	In my opinion, it is always wrong for a teacher to play favorites. I myself was a victim of this back in Bluefield, West Virginia.
	Last edited by Lee; 06-12-2007 at 12:10 AM.

09-15-2005, 08:17 PM	#11
Hollow Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 16, 2001 Posts: 30,406	it's natural to want to play favorites but it's wrong regardlessly.

09-15-2005, 09:27 PM	#12
Pleasant Tomorrow Member Forum Addict Join Date: Feb 19, 2003 Location: New York Posts: 69,525	I think that it is definately right to select degenerates over the smart children solely because they have washboard abs or a sparkling personality...that way they can get into an ivy league college and run our country one day.
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09-15-2005, 11:52 PM	#13
AD FAN American Dreams Frequent Poster Join Date: Nov 08, 2004 Location: New York Posts: 386	i'm a counselor at a sports camp for girls from age 8 to 15. its not that we had favorites (well we kinda did, but didn't favor them during camp), but we did have a few that we did not like at all, either because they were brats or mean to the other campers.
	__________________ . . "Celebrate we will, cause life is short but sweet for certain." -Dave Matthews (AD stands for the former NBC show "American Dreams.")