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felicitylen · 08-16-2005, 04:47 PM

I basically just feel like venting. Here goes.

I have always gone to church, basically because I had to. Now that I have moved clearly to another state, I've noticed that my mom calls me every Sunday only to ask if I gone. It didn't really bother me at first, but now it does. These past couple of Sundays, I haven't felt like attending church. My mom called last Sunday, and she told me I better go. Here's the thing, growing up, I rarely had any choices. My mom TOLD me what I should do, wear, go, etc. Now that I have moved out and away, she is still acting the same way. She raised her voice over the phone, when I told her I didn't go to church on Sunday. I just feel like it's finally my decision or choice. What's weird is, I don't even feel guilty about not going to church. That's not the only thing she raised her voice about. She even wants me to move back home to attend grad school, so that way she can visit me more often (that was her actual reason). *This was a short and sweet venting*

Any advice for me on how to handle this situation? Anyone out there who has gone through something similar?

barwars · 08-16-2005, 04:55 PM

If you don't want to go to church, don't. It's your choice and yours alone.

The Modfather · 08-16-2005, 04:55 PM

EDIT: Stupid comment by me.

Nighthawk76 · 08-16-2005, 05:28 PM

I used to go to Church every Sunday morning, but I stopped going about five years ago. This wasn't becasue I lost faith in God or the teachings of Jesus, my faith is still a very important part of my life. I stopped attending Church because I didn't feel I was getting as much out of it as I wanted. The Priest spent more time talking about the weekly fundriasers then he did any spiritual matters. I do miss going though. I strongly disagree with Lucas that Church is a place for suckers.

The Modfather · 08-16-2005, 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

I used to go to Church every Sunday morning, but I stopped going about five years ago. This wasn't becasue I lost faith in God or the teachings of Jesus, my faith is still a very important part of my life. I stopped attending Church because I didn't feel I was getting as much out of it as I wanted. The Priest spent more time talking about the weekly fundriasers then he did any spiritual matters. I do miss going though. I strongly disagree with Lucas that Church is a place for suckers.

DAX, I guess that my statement was a little strong, but I feel that putting your faith in something that you can't see, talk to, or hear is not for me. I also can't understand why people follow the bible so closely, it was just written by an average guy. Because, if God does exist I don't think he'd be so against homosexuality. People are people and if God is truly as great as everyone says he wouldn't care about homosexuality, abortion, etc, etc.

Rene · 08-16-2005, 06:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DAX

I used to go to Church every Sunday morning, but I stopped going about five years ago. This wasn't becasue I lost faith in God or the teachings of Jesus, my faith is still a very important part of my life. I stopped attending Church because I didn't feel I was getting as much out of it as I wanted. The Priest spent more time talking about the weekly fundriasers then he did any spiritual matters. I do miss going though. I strongly disagree with Lucas that Church is a place for suckers.

i agree- all my pastor wanted to talk about was how bad other religions were and he always bashed gay people so i stopped going too besides my church was becoming a fashion show and a place to meet with boys/girls it wasnt about God anymore
but anywho felicitylen i think you should tell your mother that its your choice to go or not and youll go when youre ready and when you want to

Nighthawk76 · 08-16-2005, 06:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Modfather

DAX, I guess that my statement was a little strong, but I feel that putting your faith in something that you can't see, talk to, or hear is not for me. I also can't understand why people follow the bible so closely, it was just written by an average guy. Because, if God does exist I don't think he'd be so against homosexuality. People are people and if God is truly as great as everyone says he wouldn't care about homosexuality, abortion, etc, etc.

Lucas, I just want you to know that I wasn't offended by what you said or was upset in anyway. I just disagreed with you.

As far as homosexuality goes, I don't think God has a problem with people being gay. He loves us all for who and what we are. Some religions and even the bible preach against homosexuality, but I've never for a second believed that is what God feels.

felicitylen · 08-16-2005, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by darlene_conner

i agree- all my pastor wanted to talk about was how bad other religions were and he always bashed gay people so i stopped going too besides my church was becoming a fashion show and a place to meet with boys/girls it wasnt about God anymore
but anywho felicitylen i think you should tell your mother that its your choice to go or not and youll go when youre ready and when you want to

My old church that I was attending before I moved was like that. I couldn't stand it. Also, the people at my old church and a few that I have visited since I've moved were fake. It's like why bother.

felicitylen · 08-16-2005, 07:03 PM

Thanks everyone for responding.

Brian · 08-16-2005, 07:06 PM

The next time your mother calls and asks, tell her what you have told us. You're old enough to make your own choices. Don't feel guilty about telling this to your mother. It's the truth.

Nighthawk76 · 08-16-2005, 07:17 PM

I agree that no one should be forced to go to Church if they don't want to.

Rene · 08-16-2005, 07:25 PM

hope we helped

Brian Damage · 08-16-2005, 07:51 PM

As someone who goes to church on a regular basis, I wouldn't tell you that you "have" to go. Everybody's walk is different, you should go, but don't have to.

Mikado · 08-16-2005, 08:25 PM

I stopped going when I was 18 and could make my own choices, my parents may not agree with my agnoticism, but they know its my "belief" and love me just the same.
Tell your mother its your choice and that you respect her position, but agree to disagree

Titania · 08-16-2005, 09:39 PM

It should be your decision and your decision alone.

I had the same issue w/ parents who tried to make every decision for me growing up. Now I really just dont tell them anything. It sounds awful, but its the only way Ive been able to figure out who I am. I still go to church, but I've experimented with different denominations-- from catholic to quaker... and could figure out for myself what i believed in.

08-16-2005, 04:47 PM	#1
felicitylen Keep Austin WEIRD Senior Member Join Date: Apr 17, 2003 Location: Hook 'em Horns Posts: 1,606	Church I basically just feel like venting. Here goes. I have always gone to church, basically because I had to. Now that I have moved clearly to another state, I've noticed that my mom calls me every Sunday only to ask if I gone. It didn't really bother me at first, but now it does. These past couple of Sundays, I haven't felt like attending church. My mom called last Sunday, and she told me I better go. Here's the thing, growing up, I rarely had any choices. My mom TOLD me what I should do, wear, go, etc. Now that I have moved out and away, she is still acting the same way. She raised her voice over the phone, when I told her I didn't go to church on Sunday. I just feel like it's finally my decision or choice. What's weird is, I don't even feel guilty about not going to church. That's not the only thing she raised her voice about. She even wants me to move back home to attend grad school, so that way she can visit me more often (that was her actual reason). This was a short and sweet venting Any advice for me on how to handle this situation? Anyone out there who has gone through something similar?

08-16-2005, 04:55 PM	#3
The Modfather It Sure Does Moderator Forum Celebrity Join Date: Jul 12, 2003 Location: canada Posts: 21,149	EDIT: Stupid comment by me.
	Last edited by The Modfather; 08-16-2005 at 06:17 PM.

08-16-2005, 09:39 PM	#15
Titania a part of that Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 04, 2000 Posts: 3,694	It should be your decision and your decision alone. I had the same issue w/ parents who tried to make every decision for me growing up. Now I really just dont tell them anything. It sounds awful, but its the only way Ive been able to figure out who I am. I still go to church, but I've experimented with different denominations-- from catholic to quaker... and could figure out for myself what i believed in.
	__________________ I don't mean to put on any pressure, but I know what a thing is right. and I spend every day reconfiguring my senses. I'll give you stars and the moon and a soul to guide you and a promise I'll never go I'll give you hope to bring out all the life inside you and the strength that will help you grow. myspace

08-16-2005, 04:55 PM	#2
barwars .. Forum Star Join Date: May 04, 2002 Posts: 13,273	If you don't want to go to church, don't. It's your choice and yours alone.

08-16-2005, 05:28 PM	#4
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	I used to go to Church every Sunday morning, but I stopped going about five years ago. This wasn't becasue I lost faith in God or the teachings of Jesus, my faith is still a very important part of my life. I stopped attending Church because I didn't feel I was getting as much out of it as I wanted. The Priest spent more time talking about the weekly fundriasers then he did any spiritual matters. I do miss going though. I strongly disagree with Lucas that Church is a place for suckers.

08-16-2005, 07:03 PM	#9
felicitylen Keep Austin WEIRD Senior Member Join Date: Apr 17, 2003 Location: Hook 'em Horns Posts: 1,606	Thanks everyone for responding.

08-16-2005, 07:06 PM	#10
Brian Member Forum Celebrity Join Date: Jun 23, 2001 Posts: 20,451	The next time your mother calls and asks, tell her what you have told us. You're old enough to make your own choices. Don't feel guilty about telling this to your mother. It's the truth.

08-16-2005, 07:17 PM	#11
Nighthawk76 Rachel Berry Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 28, 2003 Location: Illinois Posts: 23,254	I agree that no one should be forced to go to Church if they don't want to.

08-16-2005, 07:25 PM	#12
Rene #1 Senior Member Join Date: May 22, 2004 Location: cali Posts: 1,849	hope we helped

08-16-2005, 07:51 PM	#13
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	As someone who goes to church on a regular basis, I wouldn't tell you that you "have" to go. Everybody's walk is different, you should go, but don't have to.

08-16-2005, 08:25 PM	#14
Mikado Main st bridge Forum Superstar Join Date: Jul 06, 2005 Posts: 25,892	I stopped going when I was 18 and could make my own choices, my parents may not agree with my agnoticism, but they know its my "belief" and love me just the same. Tell your mother its your choice and that you respect her position, but agree to disagree