Male vs. Female Friendships..... - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

swedeace · 07-11-2005, 09:36 PM

Quote: Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces.--Anne Morrow Lindbergh

It seems to be true.... I have done this myself, being a female....

I have been noticing that guy's views of friendships (no matter with which sex) seem to be more relaxing. It's as though guys don't focus too much on defining their relationships (non-romantic ones) with males/females and just let things "flow." I find that females tend to talk with an acquiantance or someone they have begun conversing with a few times and immediately pegging a "friendship" with males/females. It's as though females tend to focus so much on wondering if the other person considers them a friend. They just beat themselves over it with some people they wish to befriend. I know I've done the fair share myself. I don't know how valid these are, but it seems to be the case that I've seen and heard.

What has everyone found on this interesting theory? Why are guys more relaxed than females? Hmmm....

Janet McFarland · 07-11-2005, 09:44 PM

Yeah, that's definitely true. I don't know about guys, but I feel that as a girl I have to have really close friends. Like it's a priority. I can't really explain it. I have both girl and guy friends, and talking with a guy is easier than talking to a girl sometimes.

barwars · 07-11-2005, 09:44 PM

I overanalyze a lot of things, but friendship is not one of them. Whatever happens, happens. I try not to start any (serious) trouble, and no trouble seems to happen. Girls definitely make more drama than necessary, as do some guys, but girls have it perfected. If I enjoy being with someone, whether they're a guy or a girl, then I consider them a friend.

Tuesday Weld · 07-11-2005, 09:46 PM

It just depends on the person, male, or female.

swedeace · 07-11-2005, 09:47 PM

Barwars: Ah, interesting.... Thanks for your male perspective. Is there anyone you instant message with who you do consider as a friend? Or are online people more like "chatting buddies?"

vienna waits · 07-11-2005, 09:49 PM

I consider the people I IM friends because some of them know more about me than people in real life do.

Titania · 07-11-2005, 09:53 PM

my best friend and most of my closer friends are guys...
i have a few close female friends but they take so much more work than friendships w/ my boys. guys definitely have a more laid back approach to it, friendships just sort of form over time and last, while with girls its more dramatic and have to be proactive or they fall apart.

barwars · 07-11-2005, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by swedeace

Barwars: Ah, interesting.... Thanks for your male perspective. Is there anyone you instant message with who you do consider as a friend? Or are online people more like "chatting buddies?"

Yes, but I dont think I would ever bring their name up in a "real life" conversation.

swedeace · 07-12-2005, 09:53 AM

Ah, interesting. Why not? Would you if you met them?

Also, everyone: do you also think there is a difference in writing style between males and females? Just like in person how there is the non-verbals. Hmm...

Living In a '70's Dream · 07-12-2005, 10:24 AM

Men make better friends; most of my close friendships are guys. I do not trust women (had too many bad experiences with women as pals).

swedeace · 07-12-2005, 12:35 PM

Hmmmm... I think some people are misunderstanding the point of this thread. I wasn't asking who made better friendships.... I meant it as wondering what the communication styles are with both male's and female's friendships. And I am curious as to WHY males seem to be more relaxed and not as into worrying about labeling relationship definitions of their friends. That's a different topic, and I think there was a thread for that a couple of weeks ago.

Bobby F. · 07-12-2005, 02:38 PM

Women friendships when they go bad seem to drag on. Where as men can get pissed at one another one day and be out at the bar having a beer with each other the next.

TripperFan · 07-12-2005, 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bobby F.

Women friendships when they go bad seem to drag on. Where as men can get pissed at one another one day and be out at the bar having a beer with each other the next.

I agree - that's the reason for the most part, I've had better friendships with guys. I always seemed to be considered more of "one of the guys" and didn't get many dates, but the majority of my friends have always been male.

I'll get mad, but once it's out, its forgotten and I move on. I rarely hold grudges.

Mikado · 07-12-2005, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vienna waits

I consider the people I IM friends because some of them know more about me than people in real life do.

Yup, I'll agree with that , in spades....as for real life, I find it hard to fathom why women tend to let little things put giant wedges between them and their friends/lovers, once a "fight" is over, you say sorry, you move on to the next phase and should NEVER bring it up again< Why can't women DO that??<< Please gals, clue in an ignorant male

TripperFan · 07-12-2005, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mikado

Yup, I'll agree with that , in spades....as for real life, I find it hard to fathom why women tend to let little things put giant wedges between them and their friends/lovers, once a "fight" is over, you say sorry, you move on to the next phase and should NEVER bring it up again< Why can't women DO that??<< Please gals, clue in an ignorant male

Don't know - can't help you there. It's what's driven me nuts about trying to have friendships with girls. I'm not like that - I blow up and forget it. Maybe it's some hormonal competitive thing or something, because I've noticed as I get older, and my female friends age, it's not as bad as when we were younger. Not only are grudges not held, but we just don't get into the fights the same. I used to hold grudges in my teens, but it only hurts you - its just not worth the effort.

07-11-2005, 09:36 PM	#1
swedeace Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 22, 2003 Posts: 9,009	Male vs. Female Friendships..... Quote: Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces.--Anne Morrow Lindbergh It seems to be true.... I have done this myself, being a female.... I have been noticing that guy's views of friendships (no matter with which sex) seem to be more relaxing. It's as though guys don't focus too much on defining their relationships (non-romantic ones) with males/females and just let things "flow." I find that females tend to talk with an acquiantance or someone they have begun conversing with a few times and immediately pegging a "friendship" with males/females. It's as though females tend to focus so much on wondering if the other person considers them a friend. They just beat themselves over it with some people they wish to befriend. I know I've done the fair share myself. I don't know how valid these are, but it seems to be the case that I've seen and heard. What has everyone found on this interesting theory? Why are guys more relaxed than females? Hmmm....

07-11-2005, 09:46 PM	#4
Tuesday Weld I missed you all. hugs Forum Celebrity Join Date: Feb 02, 2003 Location: Having a great time. Posts: 22,285	It just depends on the person, male, or female.
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07-11-2005, 09:49 PM	#6
vienna waits avatars are stupid. Forum Superstar Join Date: May 18, 2001 Location: Ravenclaw Common Room Posts: 29,859	I consider the people I IM friends because some of them know more about me than people in real life do.
	__________________ Me: Did you see Dunkleman in the audience at the finale? Crystal: No! Me: Yeah, that's because he wasn't invited.

07-11-2005, 09:53 PM	#7
Titania a part of that Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 04, 2000 Posts: 3,694	my best friend and most of my closer friends are guys... i have a few close female friends but they take so much more work than friendships w/ my boys. guys definitely have a more laid back approach to it, friendships just sort of form over time and last, while with girls its more dramatic and have to be proactive or they fall apart.
	__________________ I don't mean to put on any pressure, but I know what a thing is right. and I spend every day reconfiguring my senses. I'll give you stars and the moon and a soul to guide you and a promise I'll never go I'll give you hope to bring out all the life inside you and the strength that will help you grow. myspace

07-11-2005, 09:44 PM	#2
Janet McFarland Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 09, 2004 Posts: 4,344	Yeah, that's definitely true. I don't know about guys, but I feel that as a girl I have to have really close friends. Like it's a priority. I can't really explain it. I have both girl and guy friends, and talking with a guy is easier than talking to a girl sometimes.

07-11-2005, 09:44 PM	#3
barwars .. Forum Star Join Date: May 04, 2002 Posts: 13,273	I overanalyze a lot of things, but friendship is not one of them. Whatever happens, happens. I try not to start any (serious) trouble, and no trouble seems to happen. Girls definitely make more drama than necessary, as do some guys, but girls have it perfected. If I enjoy being with someone, whether they're a guy or a girl, then I consider them a friend.

07-11-2005, 09:47 PM	#5
swedeace Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 22, 2003 Posts: 9,009	Barwars: Ah, interesting.... Thanks for your male perspective. Is there anyone you instant message with who you do consider as a friend? Or are online people more like "chatting buddies?"

07-12-2005, 09:53 AM	#9
swedeace Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 22, 2003 Posts: 9,009	Ah, interesting. Why not? Would you if you met them? Also, everyone: do you also think there is a difference in writing style between males and females? Just like in person how there is the non-verbals. Hmm...

07-12-2005, 10:24 AM	#10
Living In a '70's Dream Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 17, 2005 Posts: 3,427	Men make better friends; most of my close friendships are guys. I do not trust women (had too many bad experiences with women as pals).

07-12-2005, 12:35 PM	#11
swedeace Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 22, 2003 Posts: 9,009	Hmmmm... I think some people are misunderstanding the point of this thread. I wasn't asking who made better friendships.... I meant it as wondering what the communication styles are with both male's and female's friendships. And I am curious as to WHY males seem to be more relaxed and not as into worrying about labeling relationship definitions of their friends. That's a different topic, and I think there was a thread for that a couple of weeks ago.

07-12-2005, 02:38 PM	#12
Bobby F. Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 30, 2004 Posts: 3,818	Women friendships when they go bad seem to drag on. Where as men can get pissed at one another one day and be out at the bar having a beer with each other the next.