Read this poem I wrote - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Courtnee · 05-24-2005, 10:44 PM

The second of December
I had made up my mind.
I decided I was left way too far behind
All I wanted was to end my life with the cut of a blade
So I did it at a quarter ‘till eight
Yes, the plan worked and I had died
But where I went was a big surprise
It was far from heaven and far from hell
“I must be in a Gothic Paradise.” I thought to myself

I had dreamed of this place since I was a child
But I had dreamed of it tender and mild.
For this place were certainly not any of those
Unlike anything you would ever find in Vogue.

Welcoming me were fallen angels from the sky
And they asked me “What brought you to your suicide?”
I tell them “I was unhappy. I am a fallen angel, just like you.”
“Oh, young girl, you were far from us. You had so much left to do!”
“The world rejected me, all the time I was oh so blue!”
“Very well, one day, in this realm you will be a fallen angel, too”

I walk around and find that I am dressed differently than before my death.
My dark, raven hair curly and teased high
And a black corseted dress that is pulled tight.
Black ballet shoes grace my feet
Wrapped until the ribbon meets my knee
“I look beautiful for once in my life!”
And then I remember I’m no longer alive

I sit in the field of Midnight Blue daisies
Everything here seems a little hazy
Suddenly, a voice I hear.
He says “The end is near”.
I see the man who speaks these words
His face is hidden by a dark black hood.

He holds out his hand wanting me to hold
As I grip it I feel deep pains within my soul.
Roses bleeding the blood of torment and hate
But I fear, it’s far too late
Stabbed with the thorns of the bleeding roses,
I look to the clouds that the purple sky composes.
Ravens flying through the air screaming “Nevermore! Nevermore!”
And nevermore is right
I close my eyes and say goodnight

Warm & Fuzzy · 05-24-2005, 11:02 PM

That is a very strong poem with a provoking message. Very good job. How old are you? Just wondering.

MsOrange · 05-24-2005, 11:07 PM

pretty good

*Pleasant Tomorrow* · 05-24-2005, 11:37 PM

That's really pretty

Hollow · 05-24-2005, 11:47 PM

very well-written. i like it.

Courtnee · 05-25-2005, 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quencherita

That is a very strong poem with a provoking message. Very good job. How old are you? Just wondering.

I'm 13

Courtnee · 05-25-2005, 05:46 PM

TheGreatPretender · 05-25-2005, 09:10 PM

Dude that was AWESOME. It had good metaphors and a good clear message.

Courtnee · 05-25-2005, 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheGreatPretender

Dude that was AWESOME. It had good metaphors and a good clear message.

Rhiannon · 05-25-2005, 10:50 PM

Ravens, nevermore, sounds like a Poe fan to me!

Courtnee · 05-25-2005, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Island Tahiti*

Ravens, nevermore, sounds like a Poe fan to me!

Rhiannon · 05-25-2005, 10:53 PM

that's cool. i like it, and i like poe too.

Dude111 · 02-14-2026, 03:30 PM

Wow thats a very cool poem buddy!!!!

I couldnt come up with something that good

05-24-2005, 10:44 PM	#1
Courtnee MAN VS SAMMICH. Forum Star Join Date: Mar 23, 2005 Location: Louisiana Posts: 16,413	Read this poem I wrote The second of December I had made up my mind. I decided I was left way too far behind All I wanted was to end my life with the cut of a blade So I did it at a quarter ‘till eight Yes, the plan worked and I had died But where I went was a big surprise It was far from heaven and far from hell “I must be in a Gothic Paradise.” I thought to myself I had dreamed of this place since I was a child But I had dreamed of it tender and mild. For this place were certainly not any of those Unlike anything you would ever find in Vogue. Welcoming me were fallen angels from the sky And they asked me “What brought you to your suicide?” I tell them “I was unhappy. I am a fallen angel, just like you.” “Oh, young girl, you were far from us. You had so much left to do!” “The world rejected me, all the time I was oh so blue!” “Very well, one day, in this realm you will be a fallen angel, too” I walk around and find that I am dressed differently than before my death. My dark, raven hair curly and teased high And a black corseted dress that is pulled tight. Black ballet shoes grace my feet Wrapped until the ribbon meets my knee “I look beautiful for once in my life!” And then I remember I’m no longer alive I sit in the field of Midnight Blue daisies Everything here seems a little hazy Suddenly, a voice I hear. He says “The end is near”. I see the man who speaks these words His face is hidden by a dark black hood. He holds out his hand wanting me to hold As I grip it I feel deep pains within my soul. Roses bleeding the blood of torment and hate But I fear, it’s far too late Stabbed with the thorns of the bleeding roses, I look to the clouds that the purple sky composes. Ravens flying through the air screaming “Nevermore! Nevermore!” And nevermore is right I close my eyes and say goodnight
	__________________ Whether I'm the rose of sheer perfection A freckle on the nose of life's complexion The Cinderella or the shine apple of its eye I gotta fly once, I gotta try once, Only can die once, right, sir? Ooh, life is juicy, juicy and you see, I gotta have my bite, sir. Get ready for me love, 'cause I'm a "comer" I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade

05-24-2005, 11:02 PM	#2
Warm & Fuzzy Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 02, 2001 Posts: 10,254	That is a very strong poem with a provoking message. Very good job. How old are you? Just wondering.
	__________________ "To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world." ~Unknown

05-24-2005, 11:37 PM	#4
Pleasant Tomorrow Member Forum Addict Join Date: Feb 19, 2003 Location: New York Posts: 69,525	That's really pretty
	__________________ my name is ashlee Welcome! Everything is fine.

05-25-2005, 10:50 PM	#10
Rhiannon oh, snap! Forum Fanatic Join Date: Jul 19, 2002 Location: middle of nowhere Posts: 11,097	Ravens, nevermore, sounds like a Poe fan to me!
	__________________ Nothing better the feeling is so fine Simply put I saw your love stream flow

05-24-2005, 11:07 PM	#3
MsOrange Bringin' Sexy Back Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 27, 2004 Posts: 6,133	pretty good

05-24-2005, 11:47 PM	#5
Hollow Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 16, 2001 Posts: 30,406	very well-written. i like it.

05-25-2005, 05:46 PM	#7
Courtnee MAN VS SAMMICH. Forum Star Join Date: Mar 23, 2005 Location: Louisiana Posts: 16,413

05-25-2005, 09:10 PM	#8
TheGreatPretender just because Forum Veteran Join Date: May 22, 2004 Location: Trying to think of a creative, witty location. Posts: 7,628	Dude that was AWESOME. It had good metaphors and a good clear message.

05-25-2005, 10:53 PM	#12
Rhiannon oh, snap! Forum Fanatic Join Date: Jul 19, 2002 Location: middle of nowhere Posts: 11,097	that's cool. i like it, and i like poe too.

02-14-2026, 03:30 PM	#13
Dude111 Forum Legend Join Date: Nov 05, 2013 Posts: 36,653	Wow thats a very cool poem buddy!!!! I couldnt come up with something that good