I Think I Have Separation Anxiety

[Rebel Queen 1980]

I must going crazy or something. Why is that when my parents or my other
relatives go somewhere I don't want to go with them and then a few moments
later I don't want to them to leave.I bother them by talking nonsense trying
to get them to take me them or to stay with me. I can't stand being with
people yet I'm scared too be alone.I wonder what the cause of this. I
was never allowed to speak to anybody when I was little.If I did I would
get into trouble with my parents.They still say that to me. Like if we go
somewhere and we see somebody we know.My parents say let them talk
to other people because they don't want to talk to you.I would just sit
there like an idiot and mumbling softly only when I spoken too. Now I
can never answer questions or talking correctly. Maybe that was
child abuse and I never knew. I'm so stupid !

[dawsongirl]

Originally Posted by Rebel Queen 1980

I must going crazy or something. Why is that when my parents or my other
relatives go somewhere I don't want to go with them and then a few moments
later I don't want to them to leave.I bother them by talking nonsense trying
to get them to take me them or to stay with me. I can't stand being with
people yet I'm scared too be alone.

I'm that way a lot too. I had panic attacks when my folks went to Hawaii because I worried about what if I got sick, or something went wrong with the house, or random crap like that. Best thing to do is if you're alone for a long period of time is to gove yourself a project to occupy your time and you won't even think about it. That time, I decided to paint the upstairs. Kept me so busy that it was a week later in no time. And it kept me distracted. Works for me anyway. In fact, last time my folks went out of town, I painted my bathroom.

[TripperFan]

Originally Posted by dawsongirl

I'm that way a lot too. I had panic attacks when my folks went to Hawaii because I worried about what if I got sick, or something went wrong with the house, or random crap like that. Best thing to do is if you're alone for a long period of time is to gove yourself a project to occupy your time and you won't even think about it. That time, I decided to paint the upstairs. Kept me so busy that it was a week later in no time. And it kept me distracted. Works for me anyway. In fact, last time my folks went out of town, I painted my bathroom.

Hey - I could use my kitchen painted and basement cleaned up. If I go away, will you come over and look after my house? The rollers and brushes are in the basement, and I'll get you a pair of overalls!!!

You're right though - getting yourself into a project really helps. Its natural to get nervous the first couple of times. My mom went to Texas for a month once and I was really nervous. I did miss her, but got through it o.k.. After that, I sort of enjoyed the break. Makes you appreciate each other more when they get back!!

[dawsongirl]

Originally Posted by TripperFan

Hey - I could use my kitchen painted and basement cleaned up. If I go away, will you come over and look after my house? The rollers and brushes are in the basement, and I'll get you a pair of overalls!!!

You're right though - getting yourself into a project really helps. Its natural to get nervous the first couple of times. My mom went to Texas for a month once and I was really nervous. I did miss her, but got through it o.k.. After that, I sort of enjoyed the break. Makes you appreciate each other more when they get back!!

Hey, my parents didn't even give me overalls!

[Coffeecup]

How old are you? I had feelings like that when I was a teen. I remember when I was 14 I went away for a few days and all I did was cry. I missed my parents so much. My friend and her parents who had me couldn't understand. They felt I was too much of Mama's girl. I probably was but I didn't know how to feel any different. I never had friends to talk about things like this. Held everything in. It was tough.

[TripperFan]

Originally Posted by dawsongirl

Hey, my parents didn't even give me overalls!

Oh I'd spoil ya! Overalls, a clean shower afterwards and a nice dinner with dessert!!

Don't feel bad (you too Coffeecup) - I was 27 when my mom went away and I felt the same way!!! Talk about not wanting to tell anyone! I got a cold while she was away and all I wanted was mommy to take care of me!!

[Max Whittaker]

Originally Posted by Rebel Queen 1980

I
was never allowed to speak to anybody when I was little.If I did I would
get into trouble with my parents.They still say that to me. Like if we go
somewhere and we see somebody we know.My parents say let them talk
to other people because they don't want to talk to you.I would just sit
there like an idiot and mumbling softly only when I spoken too. Now I
can never answer questions or talking correctly. Maybe that was
child abuse and I never knew. I'm so stupid !

From where I sit, it is abuse. My parents always encouraged me to speak to people, and even then, I could hardly handle it. If they had discouraged me, I can't imagine what would have happened!

It doesn't seem logical to give a child the impression that people around you don't have an interest in what you have to say! People have to talk to people. That is how our society functions. And if your parent's lessons have interfered with that then they have caused some serious damage!

I hope I'm reading the situation wrong.

[¤I Love Clay Aiken¤]

IM LIKE THAT TOO!! My parents or my mother will go out shopping or to some place that doesnt interest me so Ill say no. Then all day Ill be all sulky wishing I had gone, knowing that if I had, Id be bitching the whole time saying I want to go home. Its weird.

[Belair]

I went through this stage when I didn't want to be away from my Mum.Wherever I went,I wanted her with me.It was at a time when I was severely suffering from social anxiety,which I am not completely cured of.
However,being alone is good too.I didn't mind being by myself when my family went away and I didn't want to go because its fun to have the house to yourself,and be able to do what you want,when you want.Instead of being upset and frightened when your parents go away,try and enjoy having some 'me' time,and do the things you love to do.After all,no ones there to stop you!

[Max Whittaker]

Originally Posted by Belair

I went through this stage when I didn't want to be away from my Mum.Wherever I went,I wanted her with me.It was at a time when I was severely suffering from social anxiety,which I am not completely cured of.
However,being alone is good too.I didn't mind being by myself when my family went away and I didn't want to go because its fun to have the house to yourself,and be able to do what you want,when you want.Instead of being upset and frightened when your parents go away,try and enjoy having some 'me' time,and do the things you love to do.After all,no ones there to stop you!

...As long as it's safe and legal.

[dawsongirl]

Originally Posted by TripperFan

Oh I'd spoil ya! Overalls, a clean shower afterwards and a nice dinner with dessert!!

Don't feel bad (you too Coffeecup) - I was 27 when my mom went away and I felt the same way!!! Talk about not wanting to tell anyone! I got a cold while she was away and all I wanted was mommy to take care of me!!

Yeah, I was 23 or 24 when my folks went to Hawaii.

[Belair]

Originally Posted by Max Whittaker

...As long as it's safe and legal.

Fair enough,fair enough.

[Rebel Queen 1980]

I'm glad there were some older people here that went through that also,
I'm felt so embarrased being at 25 years old and feeling this way

[Belair]

^I didn't know you were 25,I was thinking you're younger! Oh well,it doesn't make a difference to my answer.I'm an adult to,and still have anxiety issues.