Cat Definitions (got this in an email) - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

crystals · 04-06-2005, 05:27 PM

Aquarium: interactive television for cats.

Cat: a lapwarmer with a built-in buzzer.

a four footed allergen.

a small, four-legged, fur-bearing extortionist.

a small, furry lap fungus.

a treat-seeking missile.

a wildlife control expert.

one who sleeps in old, empty pizza boxes.

a hair relocation expert.

an unprogrammable animal.

Cataclysm: any great upheaval in a cat's life.

Cat Scan: to look for a new cat.

Dog: a cat's device for running practice.

Door: something a cat always wants to be on the other side of.

Energy: the element of vitality cats always have an oversupply of until you

try to play with them.

Human: an automatic door opener for cats.

Impurrsonate: to act like the cat.

Kitten: a small homicidal muffin on legs; affects human sensibilities to

the point of endowing the most wanton and ruthless acts of destruction

with near-mythical overtones of cuteness. Not recommended for beginners.

Get at least two.

Purranoia: the fear that your cat is up to something.

Purrfume: the scent of an open can of tuna.

Purrmission: a feline hunting expedition.

Purrverse: a poem about a wicked kitty.

Yawn: a cat's honest opinion openly expressed.

Kay Scarpetta · 04-06-2005, 06:51 PM

I love it!

Rhiannon · 04-06-2005, 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crystals

a hair relocation expert

Cat Scan: to look for a new cat.

hootie hooo!

Hollow · 04-06-2005, 08:11 PM

i love kitties.

ABlairican Pie · 04-07-2005, 01:39 AM

LOVE IT!! SO TRUE!!

04-06-2005, 05:27 PM	#1
crystals Member Senior Member Join Date: Feb 02, 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 1,829	Cat Definitions (got this in an email) Aquarium: interactive television for cats. Cat: a lapwarmer with a built-in buzzer. a four footed allergen. a small, four-legged, fur-bearing extortionist. a small, furry lap fungus. a treat-seeking missile. a wildlife control expert. one who sleeps in old, empty pizza boxes. a hair relocation expert. an unprogrammable animal. Cataclysm: any great upheaval in a cat's life. Cat Scan: to look for a new cat. Dog: a cat's device for running practice. Door: something a cat always wants to be on the other side of. Energy: the element of vitality cats always have an oversupply of until you try to play with them. Human: an automatic door opener for cats. Impurrsonate: to act like the cat. Kitten: a small homicidal muffin on legs; affects human sensibilities to the point of endowing the most wanton and ruthless acts of destruction with near-mythical overtones of cuteness. Not recommended for beginners. Get at least two. Purranoia: the fear that your cat is up to something. Purrfume: the scent of an open can of tuna. Purrmission: a feline hunting expedition. Purrverse: a poem about a wicked kitty. Yawn: a cat's honest opinion openly expressed.
	__________________ The man who lends a helping hand is the true hero.

04-06-2005, 06:51 PM	#2
Kay Scarpetta Defy Gravity 8.26.05 Forum Superstar Join Date: Jul 04, 2001 Location: La Vie Boheme Posts: 28,013	I love it!
	__________________ The people who think they know everything about Broadway make me laugh. They've never seen a Broadway play in their life. "oh mi godddd RENT's a mooovie! lyke 525600 minuuuuuuutes!" No. To be a Broadway Freak, you must live, eat, sleep, study, devout, think, obsess, dream, believe Broadway. You must know original & revival casts, soundtracks, performance runs, dates, theatres, numbers, how many Tony Awards A Chorus Line won. You must be Broadway. That's right bitches. I AM Broadway.

04-07-2005, 01:39 AM	#5
ABlairican Pie Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 12, 2001 Location: Living where cats reign more Supreme than a pizza. Posts: 31,619	LOVE IT!! SO TRUE!!
	__________________ Release the kitties. --Nathan Explosion

04-06-2005, 08:11 PM	#4
Hollow Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 16, 2001 Posts: 30,406	i love kitties.