Who had the worst marriage? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Chambers · 11-06-2004, 12:42 PM

I had to add Maris and Niles - without them, the competition would be incomplete.

Just to show you how bored I am, here's a list I created:

Norm&Vera:

SEX: bad - "I look at Vera...and I just can't"

COMMUNICATION: Via phones and answering machines

FIGHTS: Norm was never around for that

ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: Norm actually loved Vera

ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Norm spent way too much time at the bar drinking his life away

Frasier&Lilith:

SEX: Pretty good, but Lilith's body temp never let it get too hot

COMMUNICATION: excessive (come on, they're both psychiatrists)

FIGHTS: quite entertaining

ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: They love their kid; Lilith is f*cking cool

ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Misery, depression, divorce

Carla&Nick

SEX: wild

COMMUNICATION: too much shouting and grunting

FIGHTS: loud, crude, always ended with sex

ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: Nick still fixes her TV and only bills her for the parts

ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: too many kids, little or no child support

Maris&Niles

SEX: non-existent

COMMUNICATION: via servants or through heavy oak doors

FIGHTS: passive-aggressive conflicts, no physical contact whatsoever, NEVER ended with sex

ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: $$$$$$$$$$$$

ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Niles was in utter denial about the whole thing

Brian Damage · 11-06-2004, 01:03 PM

Maris and Niles were one big joke of a marriage.

Chambers · 11-06-2004, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Brian Damage
Maris and Niles were one big joke of a marriage.

Indeed, but I'd rather be in that marriage than be in Carla's situation.

Brian Damage · 11-06-2004, 01:12 PM

very good point.

Moondance · 11-06-2004, 02:07 PM

My vote went to Carla and Nick! I hated that man! Eww! What a sleaze ball! As for Vera and Maris, they should be in their own little category...although we did hear Vera's voice a few times and can only imagine the God awful calamity, known as, Maris!

to Nick Tortelli!

slackermonkey · 11-06-2004, 03:38 PM

Carla and Nick.

DianeChambers87 · 11-06-2004, 08:27 PM

My God Maris and NIles! Niles is awesome and Maris sounded like she was a real handful

barwars · 11-06-2004, 10:14 PM

Maris & Niles.... because the others actually loved eachother.

You actually have them in order from best marriage to worst....

1. Norm & Vera
2. Frasier & Lilith
3. Carla & Nick
4. Maris & Niles (haha, Maris is the only woman to get first billing)

Although most entertaining is completely different

1. Frasier & Lilith
2. Norm & Vera
3. Maris & Niles
4. Carla & Nick

tiff7 · 12-30-2004, 06:27 PM

Carla & Nick! He is disgusting! I LOVE your avatar, Moondance! Princess Diaries rocks! (both of them!)

Tiff7

Happy New Year Y'all!!!!!!!!

CheersChild4life · 12-30-2004, 09:22 PM

Carla and Nick. He is a total a$$. I wouldn't know about Maris and Niles, I'm not a huge Frasier fan.

ChambersVsMalone · 12-30-2004, 09:48 PM

I'm ashamed to admit that I've never seen the first couple seasons of Frasier. I was just wondering, do they explain what happened to Frasier and Lilith's marriage? lol. Since they ARE together when Cheers ended, but obviously not together on Frasier.

Sharop · 01-01-2005, 09:11 AM

They do explain what happened; Frasier tells his listeners about it on the radio in the first episode. To quote:

"Six months ago, I was living in Boston. My wife had left me, which was very painful. Then she came back to me - which was excruciating. On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant and my social life consisted of hanging around a bar night after night. I was clinging to a life that wasn't working anymore, and I knew I had to do something, anything. So I ended the marriage once and for all, packed up my things, and moved back here to my hometown of Seattle. Go Seahawks!"

I'd recommend you see the first couple of seasons of Frasier if you can, they're out on DVD, as well as the third one. Some episodes that I like from those two seasons are:

Episode 21: "Travels With Martin."

Frasier, Niles, Martin and Daphne go out on the road for a holiday in a Winnebago. While Daphne is asleep, they cross the border into Canada, and when Daphne awakes, she is horrified - she hasn't got her green card yet, and she's not allowed to leave the United States. Martin decides they'll just have to smuggle her back across the border. However, the nervous behaviour of Frasier and Niles and the fact that Daphne only says "sure" in response to the man who questions her at the border, since it's the only word she can say with an American accent (a very bad one, at that) raise the suspicions, and it's up to Martin to sort it out.

Episode 24: "My Coffee With Niles." The whole episode took place in Cafe Nervosa, with Niles and Frasier meeting to have their usual talk. While there, Niles asks Frasier if he is happy in his new life, and Frasier finds it hard to answer - both because he thinks it's a complex question and also because every time he tries to answer, he gets interrupted by either Roz, Martin or Daphne coming over to complain. Comedy also came from the fact that Frasier kept finding something wrong with the coffee orders that the waitress was bringing him and had to keep sending them back. First it was the fact that the coffee wasn't decaf, then the fact that the milk wasn't non-fat, then the fact that there was cinammon on the coffee...when the waitress brings Niles his second cup of coffee and Frasier asks about his, the waitress sarcastically replies, "we've got a team of specialists working on it." At the end of the episode, when Frasier is sitting alone at the table, the waitress brings him a, "Zimbabwe. Decaf. Non-fat milk. No cinammon. I even threw in a few biscotti. Now - are you happy?" Frasier replies, "You know, in the grand scheme of things, yes, I'd say I am." However, it appears that he was answering Niles' question, since in the end credits, we see that Frasier is still not happy with the coffee. He summons the waitress who snatches it and stalks away with it.

There are more, but I have to leave now.

BebeSternin · 01-05-2005, 09:26 PM

As Frasier and Lilith have the best TV marriage ever to have existed... (Divorce?? What divorce??)

ChambersVsMalone · 01-17-2005, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sharop

They do explain what happened; Frasier tells his listeners about it on the radio in the first episode. To quote:

"Six months ago, I was living in Boston. My wife had left me, which was very painful. Then she came back to me - which was excruciating. On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant and my social life consisted of hanging around a bar night after night. I was clinging to a life that wasn't working anymore, and I knew I had to do something, anything. So I ended the marriage once and for all, packed up my things, and moved back here to my hometown of Seattle. Go Seahawks!"

Thanks!

dandelion wine · 01-17-2005, 11:33 PM

Niles and Maris

View Poll Results: Worst marriage:
Norm and Vera	2	11.11%
Frasier and Lilith	0	0%
Carla and Nick	10	55.56%
Maris and Niles	6	33.33%
Voters: 18. You may not vote on this poll

11-06-2004, 12:42 PM	#1
Chambers The Crane Trinity Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 27, 2004 Location: Where everybody knows a Crane. Posts: 5,427	Who had the worst marriage? I had to add Maris and Niles - without them, the competition would be incomplete. Just to show you how bored I am, here's a list I created: Norm&Vera: SEX: bad - "I look at Vera...and I just can't" COMMUNICATION: Via phones and answering machines FIGHTS: Norm was never around for that ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: Norm actually loved Vera ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Norm spent way too much time at the bar drinking his life away Frasier&Lilith: SEX: Pretty good, but Lilith's body temp never let it get too hot COMMUNICATION: excessive (come on, they're both psychiatrists) FIGHTS: quite entertaining ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: They love their kid; Lilith is fcking cool ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Misery, depression, divorce Carla&Nick* SEX: wild COMMUNICATION: too much shouting and grunting FIGHTS: loud, crude, always ended with sex ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: Nick still fixes her TV and only bills her for the parts ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: too many kids, little or no child support Maris&Niles SEX: non-existent COMMUNICATION: via servants or through heavy oak doors FIGHTS: passive-aggressive conflicts, no physical contact whatsoever, NEVER ended with sex ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: $$$$$$$$$$$$ ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE: Niles was in utter denial about the whole thing
	__________________ Member of the "God, Lilith is so ing cool" Fan Club Where everybody knows your tossed salads and scrambled eggs. FREEDOM OF THOUGHT blank

11-06-2004, 01:03 PM	#2
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	Maris and Niles were one big joke of a marriage.
	__________________ The Key to the Kingdom of Heaven: John 3:3 *Money Doesn't Buy Happiness...But I'd Rather Cry in My Private Jet*

11-06-2004, 03:38 PM	#6
slackermonkey the big yellow joint Senior Member Join Date: Oct 05, 2004 Location: Earth Posts: 1,779	Carla and Nick.
	__________________ ...Derek TV on DVD Checklist: 05/09 - Scrubs: The Complete Third Season 05/30 - Joey: The Complete First Season 06/13 - Cheers: The Complete Eighth Season 06/13 - Frasier: The Complete Eighth Season 06/20 - Justice League: Season 2 07/25 - Animaniacs: Volume 1 10/?? - Scrubs: The Complete Fourth Season 12/06 - Animaniacs: Volume 2

11-06-2004, 08:27 PM	#7
DianeChambers87 Elizabeth B. Malone Forum Veteran Join Date: Feb 16, 2003 Location: Swampland USA Posts: 5,178	My God Maris and NIles! Niles is awesome and Maris sounded like she was a real handful
	__________________ Strange Fascinations, Fascinating me

11-06-2004, 01:12 PM	#4
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	very good point.

11-06-2004, 02:07 PM	#5
Moondance MCR Moderator Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 25, 2001 Posts: 4,008	My vote went to Carla and Nick! I hated that man! Eww! What a sleaze ball! As for Vera and Maris, they should be in their own little category...although we did hear Vera's voice a few times and can only imagine the God awful calamity, known as, Maris! to Nick Tortelli!

11-06-2004, 10:14 PM	#8
barwars .. Forum Star Join Date: May 04, 2002 Posts: 13,273	Maris & Niles.... because the others actually loved eachother. You actually have them in order from best marriage to worst.... 1. Norm & Vera 2. Frasier & Lilith 3. Carla & Nick 4. Maris & Niles (haha, Maris is the only woman to get first billing) Although most entertaining is completely different 1. Frasier & Lilith 2. Norm & Vera 3. Maris & Niles 4. Carla & Nick

12-30-2004, 06:27 PM	#9
tiff7 wdwdisneylandnut4life Senior Member Join Date: Jul 26, 2001 Location: Erie, IL Posts: 2,012	Carla & Nick! He is disgusting! I LOVE your avatar, Moondance! Princess Diaries rocks! (both of them!) Tiff7 Happy New Year Y'all!!!!!!!!

12-30-2004, 09:22 PM	#10
CheersChild4life Absolutely Fabulous Senior Member Join Date: Nov 23, 2002 Location: Somwhere Fabulous Posts: 2,814	Carla and Nick. He is a total a$$. I wouldn't know about Maris and Niles, I'm not a huge Frasier fan.

12-30-2004, 09:48 PM	#11
ChambersVsMalone Cheers! Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 22, 2004 Posts: 125	I'm ashamed to admit that I've never seen the first couple seasons of Frasier. I was just wondering, do they explain what happened to Frasier and Lilith's marriage? lol. Since they ARE together when Cheers ended, but obviously not together on Frasier.

01-01-2005, 09:11 AM	#12
Sharop Andy Gibb aged 12 Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 03, 2004 Location: Courthouse Square, Hill Valley, beside the clocktower, 10:04 p.m., November 12th 1955 Posts: 3,912	They do explain what happened; Frasier tells his listeners about it on the radio in the first episode. To quote: "Six months ago, I was living in Boston. My wife had left me, which was very painful. Then she came back to me - which was excruciating. On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant and my social life consisted of hanging around a bar night after night. I was clinging to a life that wasn't working anymore, and I knew I had to do something, anything. So I ended the marriage once and for all, packed up my things, and moved back here to my hometown of Seattle. Go Seahawks!" I'd recommend you see the first couple of seasons of Frasier if you can, they're out on DVD, as well as the third one. Some episodes that I like from those two seasons are: Episode 21: "Travels With Martin." Frasier, Niles, Martin and Daphne go out on the road for a holiday in a Winnebago. While Daphne is asleep, they cross the border into Canada, and when Daphne awakes, she is horrified - she hasn't got her green card yet, and she's not allowed to leave the United States. Martin decides they'll just have to smuggle her back across the border. However, the nervous behaviour of Frasier and Niles and the fact that Daphne only says "sure" in response to the man who questions her at the border, since it's the only word she can say with an American accent (a very bad one, at that) raise the suspicions, and it's up to Martin to sort it out. Episode 24: "My Coffee With Niles." The whole episode took place in Cafe Nervosa, with Niles and Frasier meeting to have their usual talk. While there, Niles asks Frasier if he is happy in his new life, and Frasier finds it hard to answer - both because he thinks it's a complex question and also because every time he tries to answer, he gets interrupted by either Roz, Martin or Daphne coming over to complain. Comedy also came from the fact that Frasier kept finding something wrong with the coffee orders that the waitress was bringing him and had to keep sending them back. First it was the fact that the coffee wasn't decaf, then the fact that the milk wasn't non-fat, then the fact that there was cinammon on the coffee...when the waitress brings Niles his second cup of coffee and Frasier asks about his, the waitress sarcastically replies, "we've got a team of specialists working on it." At the end of the episode, when Frasier is sitting alone at the table, the waitress brings him a, "Zimbabwe. Decaf. Non-fat milk. No cinammon. I even threw in a few biscotti. Now - are you happy?" Frasier replies, "You know, in the grand scheme of things, yes, I'd say I am." However, it appears that he was answering Niles' question, since in the end credits, we see that Frasier is still not happy with the coffee. He summons the waitress who snatches it and stalks away with it. There are more, but I have to leave now.
	__________________ http://rainbowlight.proboards102.com My new astral projection forums Doc: Don't worry! As long as you hit that wire with the connecting hook at precisely 88 miles per hour, the instant the lightning strikes the tower, everything will be fine!

01-05-2005, 09:26 PM	#13
BebeSternin Sigmund Frost Forum Regular Join Date: Apr 25, 2004 Posts: 538	As Frasier and Lilith have the best TV marriage ever to have existed... (Divorce?? What divorce??)
	__________________ "I know when I'm bad, I know when I'm good, and I know when I'm everything in between. I don't have any delusions of grandeur or delusions of failure. In terms of my work, I've got a pretty cold honest eye." - Bebe Neuwirth --Sporatic poster with an amazing talent for.. vanishing.

01-17-2005, 11:33 PM	#15
dandelion wine ~ Forum Superstar Join Date: Jul 20, 2003 Location: Behind the Couch Posts: 34,967	Niles and Maris
	__________________ Fans of Jon-Erik Hexum Merry Christmas!