"The Odd Quad" Episode 4 - What A Drag!

[Chad22]

NOTE: This is The first season finale!

Themesong: "Different People" By No Doubt

CAST
Adam Collins - Chad Doody
Brad Fulton - TF
Jeff Kimble - EFD
Dana Harmon - Ravey
Walter Munson - William Daniels

GUEST STARS
Mike - Rider Strong
Mike's Mother - Barbara Eden
Allison - Lindsey Haun
Girl In Sauna - Haylie Duff
Aunt Sonya - Patrika Darbo
_____________________________________________________________________________________
*Adam & Brad are shown sitting in the living room. Adam is watching TV And Brad is reading when Jeff walks In.*

Jeff: Hey, Guys.

Brad: Hey, Jeff.

Jeff: This job hunting is exhausting.

Adam: Job hunting? Why the heck would you want a job?

Jeff: To pay rent! I'Ve been taking money out of my college funds to pay it so far. What the heck do you guys do to get money?

Brad: I Have a rich daddy.

Adam: I Sold my body to science.......Then they gave me double to take it back.

Brad: Somehow that doesn't surprise me.

Jeff: Well, I Have to get a job, But its like theres nothing available!

Brad: Keep looking. Bound to be something. Have you checked the newspaper?

Jeff: Not Yet. Good idea, Though!

*Jeff walks off as Adam & Brad continue to sit.*

Brad: Hey, Adam?

Adam: Yeah?

Brad: Are you as bored as i am?

Adam: You bet i am.....They've shown this episode of Laverne & Shirley At LEAST 3 Times this month.

Brad: Wanna go to Tony's?

Adam: I Dunno...

Brad: I'm Buying...

Adam: Ok, Lets Go!

*Adam & Brad walk out the door. Dana & Mike are then shown sitting in a booth at Tony's Pizzeria.*

Dana: So whats this surprise you have lined up for me tonight?

Mike: Babe, If i told you...It wouldnt be a surprise!

*Dana Smiles as they stand up and kiss.*

Dana: I'm gonna go home and get ready, Then.

Mike: Ok. Meet me back here about 7?

Dana: See you then.

*Dana walks out as Mike starts to look nervous then walks up to a payphone. He rings a number and an older lady is shown in a motel picking it up.*

Older Lady: Hello?

Mike: Hey, Mom.

Mike's Mom: Hi, Honey.

Mike: Hows the hotel?

Mike's Mom: Oh its Just fine. *Grins* Very cute bell boys.

Mike: *Laughs* I Told Dana to meet me tonight at 7. I'll come by and pick you up before.

Mike's Mom: I'm so excited to finally meet her. You talk about her all the time!

*Adam & Brad are shown walking In And see Mike, Mike however doesnt see them.*

Mike: What can i say? I'm In Love.

Mike's Mom: I'm Happy for you. But whats this big surprise tonight?

Mike: I Cant tell you yet.

Mike's Mom: Does Dana know i'm here?

Mike: No, I Didnt tell her. Dana doesnt expect a THING!

*Adam and Brad Look a little confused and curious.*

Mike's Mom: Ok Dear, I Love you.

Mike: I Love you too, See you at 7.

*Mike hangs up the phone and starts to walk out as he sees Adam & Brad.*

Mike: Hey Guys.

*Mike walks out as Adam & Brad stand Looking at each other shocked.*

Adam: Did you just hear what i heard?

Brad: I'm standing right next to you, You Moron!

Adam: Mike is cheating on Dana...

Brad: Lets not jump to conclusions. It could have been a friend.

Adam: Yeah. People always say I Love you and "Dana doesnt expect a thing" To friends.

Brad: Ok Ok, But what are we gonna do?

Adam: I Dunno...

Brad: I Say we go home and let Dana know what kind of slimeball he is.

Adam: No....That wouldnt work.

Brad: Why Not?

Adam: Havent you ever seen a sitcom?! Whenever someone is cheating On someone and their friend finds out and tells them, They never believe them!

Brad: But this isnt a sitcom, This is life.

Adam: Oh No, My friend. When you've experienced life through my eyes you will come to find that sitcoms and life arent that different.

Brad: Life through your eyes? All you DO Is watch TV!

Adam: Exactly! So i would know about something like this.

Brad: Ok Ok, But what else can we do?

Adam: We have to catch him in the act and get proof.

Brad: How do you propose we do that?

Adam: We show up tonight...And we get him to cheat on Dana in front of an entire restaurant of witnesses. If hes willing to cheat on Dana with one girl, I'm Almost positive he'd be willing to cheat on both with a 3rd. All we need is a girl to sorta flirt with him.

Brad: Ok, But how are we gonna get a girl to flirt with him?

*Adam thinks for a second and walks up to a girl.*

Adam: Hi, I'm Adam.

Girl: *Smiles* I'm Allison.

Adam: Nice to meet you Allison, See...I Need a girl for this guy i know. And Money is NOT A problem!

Allison: *Shocked* What kind of girl do you think i am?

Adam: *Smiles* The kind of girl thats perfect for the job!

*Allison Punches Adam in the face as he falls back and she storms out of the restaurant. Brad then calmly looks around, Then Looks down.*

Brad: Any other genius ideas?

Adam: Uhhhh.....Yes.

*Adam slowly stands up as him and Brad walk over a little.*

Adam: If we cant get a girl to help us out, Theres only one other alternative...

Brad: *Not Looking too sure* Whats That?

*The Background of "Hit Me Baby One More Time" By Britney Spears plays as the apartment is shown. 2 High heels are then shown walking as the cameras slowly goes up and shows Adam & Brad in Women's clothing and wearing wigs and makeup. Adam is smiling as Brad Looks angry and annoyed And the music cuts.*

Brad: No, Not doing it.

*Brad trys to walk away but Adam pulls him back.*

Adam: Dude....Its for Dana.

Brad: *Sighs* Adam, Do you honestly think anyones gonna think we're girls?

*Jeff is shown walking in as he looks over and his eyes widen.*

Jeff: Wow...

*Brad Looks scared.*

Jeff: What is a couple of HOTTYS Like you doing here?

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Uhhh....We're friends of Dana.

Jeff: Where is Dana?

Brad: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* She Uhhhh Had to Uhhh...

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Had to buy paint.

Jeff: Paint?....For what?

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Uhhhhh....Squirrels.

*Jeff Looks confused as Brad looks at Adam like hes an idiot.*

Jeff: Well, Ok. I'll be in my room....Which is more than big enough for 2, If you catch my drift.

*Jeff winks and walks towards his room as Brad & Adam Look horrified.*

Brad: No, Not doing it...

*Adam Pulls Brad back again.*

Adam: Relax. It'll be fine.

*Adam & Brad walk towards the door and open it to see Mr. Munson.*

Mr. Munson: I Just came by for the ren....

*Mr. Munson stares at Adam & Brad as about 5 seconds of awkward silence goes by. Mr. Munson then turns around and walks away without saying a word.*

Brad: Well....Least theres one benefit to all this. By the way, Its still 2 hours before 6. What should we do til then?

Adam: Hmmmm...

*Adam & Brad are shown sitting in a sauna wearing their wigs, Makeup and towels as a bunch of other girls are shown in towels.*

Girl: *Laughing* Oh Adama, You're a riot. The time has just flown by today.

Adam: *In Pathetic girl voice* I Also make good Cinnamon Buns!

*All the girls laugh. One girl then looks over at Brad and notices his leg is hairy.*

Girl: Ummmm....I Dont mean to seem rude, But dont you think you should shave those?

*Brad Looks annoyed as Adam giggles like a girl.*

Adam: *In Pathetic Girl Voice* Oh shes always been like that....She grew up in a hippy family. You Know....Bra Burning, Not shaving your legs, Hugging trees.

*The girls all laugh.*

Girl: I Wish i could meet a guy with a personality like you.

Adam: *Raises Eyebrow* You Do?....I Mean *Girls Voice* You Do?

Girl: Oh yeah, Do you have a brother?

Adam: Better than that...

*Adam takes off his wig exposing hes a guy as a bunch of the girls scream and run out. The girl he was talking to then Looks mad as Adam's smile turns to horror and she punches him down. She then runs out as Brad looks around a few seconds, Then Looks down.*

Brad: Smooth, Adam. Smooth.

*Adam slowly gets to his feet and puts his wig back on.*

Adam: We gotta get to Tony's.

*Adam & Brad walk out. Mike & His Mom are shown sitting in a booth at Tony's when his Mom stands Up.*

Mike's Mom: Wheres the bathroom, Dear?

Mike: Over to the left *Mike Points*

Mike's Mom: Ok, I'll be right back.

*Mike's Mom walks to the bathroom as Adam & Brad are shown walking In, Still in drag.*

Brad: There he is.

Adam: I Guess his date hasnt shown up yet.

Brad: Get to it.

Adam: Me? Why do I Have to do it?!

Brad: It was your idea!

Adam: Exactly, I've done my part....Now do yours.

Brad: Listen Adam, Its bad enough you got me in a dress....But there is NO Way i am hitting on Mike.

Adam: Ok, Ok.

*Adam walks towards Mike as Jeff walks in and walks up to Brad.*

Jeff: We meet again!

Brad: *Fake & Nervous Girl Giggle* Yeah....

Jeff: How about a milkshake? My treat!

*Brad Looks at Jeff nervously and sighs*

Brad: *In His Normal Voice* Why Not...

*Brad walks to a table as Jeff stands a second looking confused. Adam is then shown talking to Mike.*

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Hiya, Big Boy.

Mike: Uhhh.....Hi...

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Howsa bout we go see a movie, Sugah?

*Adam winks as Mike Looks at her oddly.*

Mike: ...No Thanks...

Adam: *In Pathetic Attempt At A Girl's Voice* Why Not?

Mike: Well for one i have a girlfriend, And two....You're kinda.....Freaky.

Adam: *Shocked Girl's Voice* What do you mean freaky?!

Mike: I Dont mean to be rude....But could you go somewhere else now?

Adam: *Mad Girl's Voice* Oh so thats how it is......I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? AM I NOT PRETTY ENOUGH?!

*Mike Looks confused and a little afraid.*

Adam: *Mad Girl's Voice* WELL LET ME TELL YOU, BUDDY...YOU'RE NOT SO HOT YOURSELF!

*Adam takes the glass of water off Mike's table and splashes it in his face. Then walks out as everyone in the restaurant cheers. Brad & Jeff are shown sitting at a booth looking confused.*

Jeff: Whats with your friend?

Brad: *Girl's Voice: Uhhh You Know.....That time of the month again.

Jeff: Ah.

*Adam is shown walking back in and walks up to Mike.*

Adam: *Girl's Voice* And another thing...

*Adam takes off the wig revealing himself.*

Mike: ADAM?!

Jeff: ADAM?!

Brad: Uhhhh...Oh My God I, Never Knew.

Adam: Oh give it up, will ya?

*Adam walks over and Pulls Brad's wig off as Jeff Looks shocked.*

Jeff: BRAD?!

Brad: IT WAS ADAM'S IDEA, I SWEAR!

Jeff: THATS UNSANITARY........To think I almost KISSED You.

Brad: I Think i'm gonna be sick...

Jeff: No Please...Dont make things any more unsanitary than they already are.

Mike: What the heck are you guys doing?

Adam: Well we TRIED To catch you in the act, But it backfired......AND I RESENT THE FACT THAT YOU SAID I WAS FREAKY!

Mike: YOU'RE WEARING A DRESS!

Adam: ...Point Taken.

Mike: But wait....Catch me doing What in the act?!

*Mike's Mom walks out of the bathroom.*

Mike's Mom: Honey....Whats going on?

Adam: *Looking Disgraced* Mike....UNBELIEVEABLE. Its bad enough you're cheating on Dana.....But with a woman old enough to be your MOTHER?!

Mike: She IS My Mother you moron!

Adam: A Likely story....*Points To Large Woman sitting at table* And i suppose That lady over there is your aunt.

Mike: ...Aunt Sonya?

*Aunt Sonya stands up.*

Aunt Sonya: Mikey?! Is that you?!

Mike: Wow, I Haven't seen you in months!

Mike's Mom: I Didnt know you were in town, Sonya!

Brad: *Sarcastically* Good Call, Adam.

Adam: But i still dont get one thing....When you said Dana doesnt expect a thing, What did you mean?

*Dana walks In.*

Dana: Mike? Whats going on?

Mike: .....Your Surprise!

*Dana Looks at Adam & Brad confused.*

Dana: Adam & Brad in dresses?

Mike: No....My Mother!

Dana: Your mother?

Mike's Mom: Its so nice to meet you, Dana!

*Mike's Mom Hugs Dana as Dana smiles in surprise.*

Dana: Wow! Its nice to meet you too!

Mike: But thats not the only surprise...

*Dana Looks confused as Mike gets down on his knee and pulls a tiny box out of his pocket. He then pulls out a ring.*

Mike: Will you marry me?

*Everyone Looks shocked, Including Dana who is both shocked and happy.*

Dana: ........YES!

*Everyone, Still shocked, begin to applaud as Mike puts the ring around Dana's finger.*

Dana: Oh My God......This is......This is...Unreal.

Mike: But it is real, Dana. And i want to spend the rest of my life with you.

*Dana Smiles and kisses Mike as everyone continues to applaud.*

Brad: Well not only were you totally wrong about EVERYTHING, But you also made me wear a dress and come down here and make a fool of myself.

Adam: I'm gonna pay for this....Arent i?

Brad: *With a fake smile* Oh, Yeah...Very much so.

*Adam Looks scared as Dana & Mike stop kissing.*

Dana: When do you want to get married?

Mike: Well, I Know this is kind of short notice....But i wanna do this as soon as possible. So i was thinking in about a month?

Dana: A Month?....Why so soon?

Mike: I May as well tell you my other surprise.....You know that big job i was offered?

Dana: You got it?!

Mike: I Sure did! The Money is great, the hours are limited so we can spend lots of time together, And the greatest thing about it all......Its In New York!

Mike's Mom: *Shocked* Thats only a few hours away from Boston, I Could come visit you anytime!

Dana: *Happy* New York....You mean....?

Mike: *Happy* We're Moving!

Dana: *Happy* We're Moving?!

Adam, Brad & Jeff: *Shocked* YOU'RE MOVING?!

*The episode ends with a shot of Adam, Brad & Jeff Looking upset by the news.*


TO BE CONTINUED...

[EmoJoe]

Great episode

[Cactus Jack]

Hilarious!! Bravo!!!

[Zuzzy]

The funniest episode yet :rotflmlao: I can't wait for the next season.

[Stormtracker TF]

Excellent work, Chad. Thats awesome.