Jack On Crack

[Elvis Fonzie Dean]

Writers:Chad Doody and Elvis Fonzie Dean

Jack Wilson - Himself
Figgy Maroni - Joey Lawrence
Roger - Mathew Botuchis
Dan - Elden Henson
EFD - Himself
TF - Himself
Chad Doody - Himself
Cops - Dan Aykroyd And John Goodman
Jack's Mom - Eve Plumb
Hilary Duff - Herself
Lisa - Lisa Foiles
Mark - Jeremy Ray Valdez

_________________________________

*The sun comes Up and the rooster **** a doodle doos as Jack's house is shown*

Mom:Jack! Time to Get Up for school!

*Jack wakes up on toilet*

Jack:Ok!

*Jacks doesn't wipe his butt and leaves to school*

*Jack sits down in class*

Lisa:What smells so bad?

Jack:I dunno.Makes me wanna barf *laughs loud and hard*

*Bell rings and Jack walks out of school*

*Mark looks at Jack's legs*

Mark:Is that brown sweat running down your legs?

Jack: *Laughs Hard* Must of spilt my chocolate milk.

*Jack says bye and goes to his street*

Mark:I coulda sworn he drank water.

*Gang grabs Jack and throws him in car*

Figgy:YO YO YO SMOKE CRACK AND GET A HOE.

Jack: *Laughs loud and hard* Where are you guys taking me?

Roger:Are you on crack?

Jack:HAHAHAHAHA No.

*Figgy whispers to guys*

Figgy:This guy's laughing and he's being kidnapped.Could you imagine him on crack?

Dan:You know...we can really use this guy...he's care free...imagine him on crack.We can be unstoppable.

Figgy:Hey, what's your name kid?

Jack:Jack, but you can call me Jack Malcom Wilson.

Figgy:I'll think i'll stick to Jack...so Jack, did you know if you smoke money it makes you feel rich?

Jack:I already am rich!

Figgy:You are?

Jack:Yup!

Figgy:Close your eyes, Jack.I have a surprise for you.

Jack:Ok!

*Figgy knocks out Jack and grabs into Jack's pocket*

Figgy:This guy is rich?And he doesn't carry money?He must lying.

Roger:I don't know man...this guy's crazy.He could be telling the truth.

*Gang carries Jack into their apartment and five hours later Jack wakes up*

Jack:Sorry for falling asleep in the car guys.Is this your apartment?

Dan:Yup.

Jack:Cool!

*Blood runs down Jack's Nose*

Jack:You gotta napkin?I got some ketchup on my face.

*Seven minutes later*

Roger:...............................Y....e....a....h...

Figgy:Hey Jack..We're friends right?

Jack:No

Figgy:Of course we are. And friends do friends favors, Which is why i want you to help us rob a liquor store tonight.

Jack:Why?

Dan:Because we want Liquor?....

*Jack gives Blank stare*

Roger:And we dont wanna pay for it...

*Jack gives blank stare*

Figgy:And Uhhh...They have cake too.

Jack:I LOVE CAKE!

Figgy:Sure ya do Jack, All Kids love cake. And if you do this for us...You will have all the cake you could ever want.

Jack:COOL!

Dan Whispering To Figgy: This is almost TOO Easy.

*Later that night at the Liquor store Jack sneaks In and looks around while the Gang talks to him on a walky talky*

Figgy:Ok Jack, Just grab The Liquor And the Loot...Put it in the bag and sneak out as fast as you snuck in.

Jack:What about the cake?

Figgy:The cake comes later. Now get the Liquor and the loot and get out of their.

*Jack puts a bunch of bottles in the bag than emptys the cash register and puts it all in the bag, Than walks out. Back at their apartment they are drinking liquor and counting the money while Jack eats his cake*

Figgy:Good Job kid. Your gonna make us alot of money.

Jack:This Is some good cake.

Roger:Cake? That came out of the toile...Yeeeees, Cake.

*Jack Keeps eating*

Figgy:Hey kid, you want some crack?

Jack:What?

Dan:Try some of this

*Dan takes a straw and inhales some crack off the table than gives the straw to Jack. Jack does it than starts shakin and making noises*

Figgy:Whats going on?

Roger:I Think the kids diein or somethin...

*Jack stops shaking and they all walk up to him*

Figgy:Hey Kid, You Alright?

Jack In English Accent: Quite alright My good man, But im afraid im going to have to alert the police about you Manipulating a young boy into doing your dirty deeds for you.

Roger:WHAAAA?

Figgy:You going to stab me in the back? After all i have done for you?

Jack In English Accent:All you have done for me? You obviously used my lower than average IQ To Manipulate me into doing dirty deeds that may i add are illegal. However i must say your plan was quite brilliant.

Dan:It was?

Jack In English Accent:Indubitably

Roger:Your making my head hurts man.

Jack In English Accent:No No My Friend, I Believe that would be the Alcohol. You did drink quite a large consumption of it afterall.

*TF, EFD And 2 Cops bust in the door*

TF:Hey Jack, We seen you keep coming in here and thought it was kind of suspicious.

EFD:Yeah, So we went to the cops and they told us these guys are Gangsters.

TF: So When we noticed you standing alone outside hours ago we planted this bug the police gave us on you.

Cop 1:We've been trying to bust these guys for a long time.

Cop 2:And we heard everything thats happened. Good job Wilson.

*The cops arrest the gangsters and bring them out*

Jack In English Accent: Excellent Job Gentlemen. I Always thought you were rather......How should i put this....Slow. But your assumption that something was wrong was indeed very true and i am impressed by the actions you both took to help me.

TF and EFD:HUH?

Jack:I Dunno

EFD: D*mn Straight. What a perfect ending....Except ONE Thing.

TF: Whats That EFD?

*EFD Walks away than turns around with a Machine Gun*

EFD: This

*EFD Starts shooting at TF With the Machine gun laughing histerically Than wakes up in bed*

EFD: Awww, It was Only a Dream!

*TF walks in*

EFD: TF? What brings you here at 6:30 in the Mornin'? Aint it A LOOOOVELY Mornin'?

TF: This

*TF starts shooting at EFD With a Machine gun while Laughing Histerically, Than wakes up in his bed*

TF: Awww....It was only a dream.

*Hilary Duff walks In as TF Looks shocked*

TF: WHAT THE?

*Hilary Duff starts shooting at TF With a machine gun, Than Chad walks in wearing a suit with his Hair slicked back*

Chad: He was a Good Man....It Always makes me sad to see a good man die. Especially when im the one that sent the Murderer.

*Hilary Duff Grabs Chad by the tie than starts kissing him passionately Before stopping*

Hilary: Every film you make... And every buck you make..Every flop you make, Each Gigli remake...I'll be watchin' you!

Chad: ....Excuse Me?

Hilary: Every role you play... And every line you say...Every filming day, Every script you take...I'll be watchin' you!

Chad: PARODYS? WHY ARE YOU SINGING PARODYS?

*Hilary's Face turns to cake*

Chad: CAKE?.....WAIT A MINUTE....THIS ISNT MY DREAM! THIS IS...

Mom:Jack! Time to Get Up for school!

*Jack wakes up On the toilet*

Jack:Ok!

*Jacks doesn't wipe his butt and leaves to school*

*Jack sits down in class*

Lisa:What smells so bad?

Jack:I dunno.Makes me wanna barf *laughs loud and hard*

*Bell rings and Jack walks out of school*

*Mark looks at Jack's legs*

Mark:Is that brown sweat running down your legs?

Jack: *Laughs Hard* Must of spilt my chocolate milk.

*Jack says bye and goes to his street*

Mark:I coulda sworn he drank water.

*Gang grabs Jack and throws him in car*

Figgy Maroni:YO YO YO SMOKE CRACK AND GET A HOE.

Jack's Thoughts In His Mind:This all Looks familiar. Maybe i should try to find a way to get away from these guys.....NAHHHHH!

Jack: *Laughs loud and hard* Where are you guys taking me?

*The car drives off into the sunset*



The End

[Stormtracker TF]

Great Job Guys.

[Chad22]

Originally posted by Stormtracker TF


Great Job Guys.

Thanks.

[robyrob]

man, that crack is wack

!

[Cactus Jack]