J Peterman - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Elaine Benes · 03-09-2004, 07:24 PM

On the other hand I am really digging J. Peterman. He's so handsome and funny at the same time. He is a great Seinfeld character.

Maestro · 03-09-2004, 07:30 PM

Peterman is slick.
Good character.

I love his Appocalypse Now parady from 142 The Chicken Roaster:
(A boy cuts a piece of fruit in the background, Peterman scolds him in another language )

E: You speak Burmese?

PETERMAN: No Elaine, that was gibberish. So did you have any trouble finding the place?

E: No, you're the only white poet warlord in the neighborhood.

P: Are you an assassin?

E: I work for your mail order catalog.

P: You're an errand girl, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.

and...

Maestro · 03-09-2004, 07:34 PM

173 The Bookstore:
PETERMAN: My friends, a toast. As the wolly-haired Melanasians of Papua, New Guinea once said, *clickity-clak-snap-donk-*&%$-pop!
(The music starts up)
PETERMAN: All right! Who's dancing? (No one makes a gesture that they intend to dance) No one? Alright, I'll just have to get things started. (Grabs a gal, spins & starts to dance, the crowd is impressed)

Elaine Benes · 03-09-2004, 07:34 PM

Elaine Benes · 03-09-2004, 07:37 PM

What episode was his first appearance on the show?

Maestro · 03-09-2004, 07:47 PM

110 The Understudy;

His 1st appearence:
(rainy night on the street)

E: (sob sob) (bumps into man with an umbrella) … I don't even know where I'm going.

PETERMAN: That's the best way to get someplace you've never been.

E: yes, (sob) I suppose, …

PETERMAN: Have you been crying?

E: Yes, (sob) you see this (sob) woman, this manicurist,…

P: Oh no, that doesn’t matter now. That's a very nice jacket.

E: Uh, (sob) thanks.

P: Very soft, huge button flaps, cargo pockets, draw string waist, deep biswing vents in the back perfect for jumping into a gondola.

E: How do you know all that?

P: That's my coat.

E: You mean..?

P: Yes, I'm J. Peterman.

E: Oh!

'Lainie later impresses him with some descriptions of her own. At that point I thought he was going to be an Elaine love interest.

Elaine Benes · 03-09-2004, 07:51 PM

now that would've been funny!

Brian Damage · 03-09-2004, 08:37 PM

PETERMAN: Elaine, I have a question for you. Is the item still...with you?

ELAINE: Um...as far as I know.

PETERMAN: Do you know what happens to a butter-based frosting after six decades in a poorly ventilated English basement?

ELAINE: Uh, I guess I hadn't--

PETERMAN: Well, I have a feeling that what you are about to go through is punishment enough. Dismissed.

Maestro · 03-09-2004, 08:38 PM

That's a great one!

leroykevin · 04-14-2005, 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brian Damage

PETERMAN: Elaine, I have a question for you. Is the item still...with you?

ELAINE: Um...as far as I know.

PETERMAN: Do you know what happens to a butter-based frosting after six decades in a poorly ventilated English basement?

ELAINE: Uh, I guess I hadn't--

PETERMAN: Well, I have a feeling that what you are about to go through is punishment enough. Dismissed.

Excuse my ignorance, but what is she about to go through?

Seinatra · 04-14-2005, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leroykevin

Excuse my ignorance, but what is she about to go through?

The 'item' is going to be coming back out of her, think Kramer when he drank the spoiled milk multiplied by 75 years or so.

Maestro · 04-16-2005, 03:54 PM

So basically, she'll have the exreme gut ache & the craps from eating a 60 year old bakery item

03-09-2004, 07:24 PM	#1
Elaine Benes Vixxxen Senior Member Join Date: Oct 23, 2003 Location: NYC Posts: 1,333	J Peterman On the other hand I am really digging J. Peterman. He's so handsome and funny at the same time. He is a great Seinfeld character.

03-09-2004, 07:30 PM	#2
Maestro Hipster Dufus Senior Member Join Date: May 31, 2002 Location: Below the equator Posts: 2,905	Peterman is slick. Good character. I love his Appocalypse Now parady from 142 The Chicken Roaster: (A boy cuts a piece of fruit in the background, Peterman scolds him in another language ) E: You speak Burmese? PETERMAN: No Elaine, that was gibberish. So did you have any trouble finding the place? E: No, you're the only white poet warlord in the neighborhood. P: Are you an assassin? E: I work for your mail order catalog. P: You're an errand girl, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill. and...

03-09-2004, 07:34 PM	#3
Maestro Hipster Dufus Senior Member Join Date: May 31, 2002 Location: Below the equator Posts: 2,905	173 The Bookstore: PETERMAN: My friends, a toast. As the wolly-haired Melanasians of Papua, New Guinea once said, clickity-clak-snap-donk-&%$-pop! (The music starts up) PETERMAN: All right! Who's dancing? (No one makes a gesture that they intend to dance) No one? Alright, I'll just have to get things started. (Grabs a gal, spins & starts to dance, the crowd is impressed)

03-09-2004, 07:37 PM	#5
Elaine Benes Vixxxen Senior Member Join Date: Oct 23, 2003 Location: NYC Posts: 1,333	What episode was his first appearance on the show?

03-09-2004, 07:47 PM	#6
Maestro Hipster Dufus Senior Member Join Date: May 31, 2002 Location: Below the equator Posts: 2,905	110 The Understudy; His 1st appearence: (rainy night on the street) E: (sob sob) (bumps into man with an umbrella) … I don't even know where I'm going. PETERMAN: That's the best way to get someplace you've never been. E: yes, (sob) I suppose, … PETERMAN: Have you been crying? E: Yes, (sob) you see this (sob) woman, this manicurist,… P: Oh no, that doesn’t matter now. That's a very nice jacket. E: Uh, (sob) thanks. P: Very soft, huge button flaps, cargo pockets, draw string waist, deep biswing vents in the back perfect for jumping into a gondola. E: How do you know all that? P: That's my coat. E: You mean..? P: Yes, I'm J. Peterman. E: Oh! 'Lainie later impresses him with some descriptions of her own. At that point I thought he was going to be an Elaine love interest.

03-09-2004, 07:51 PM	#7
Elaine Benes Vixxxen Senior Member Join Date: Oct 23, 2003 Location: NYC Posts: 1,333	now that would've been funny!

03-09-2004, 08:37 PM	#8
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,107	PETERMAN: Elaine, I have a question for you. Is the item still...with you? ELAINE: Um...as far as I know. PETERMAN: Do you know what happens to a butter-based frosting after six decades in a poorly ventilated English basement? ELAINE: Uh, I guess I hadn't-- PETERMAN: Well, I have a feeling that what you are about to go through is punishment enough. Dismissed.

03-09-2004, 08:38 PM	#9
Maestro Hipster Dufus Senior Member Join Date: May 31, 2002 Location: Below the equator Posts: 2,905	That's a great one!

04-16-2005, 03:54 PM	#12
Maestro Hipster Dufus Senior Member Join Date: May 31, 2002 Location: Below the equator Posts: 2,905	So basically, she'll have the exreme gut ache & the craps from eating a 60 year old bakery item