HD Infirmary

[Moonlight Lady]

Katie: I hope you're not planning on sticking me with that thing.

Nurse Joanie: It won't hurt..much.

Katie: Much?...like how much.

Joanie: Like bee sting.

Katie: *hack* *hack* Oh boy *passes out too*

Jenny: Oh well, they'll be alot easier to take care of this way.

Joanie: That's true, you can't argue with an unconscious person.

They change the sheets on the beds and tuck all the gang in and leave. Everyone dreams of sock hops and hamburgers and Fonzie.

[Tuscadero]

Early the next morning Richie comes to check on the invalids.

Richie: Goooood morning, patients! Dr. Mom--I mean, Marion--has some great things for breakfast--everybody gets homemade oatmeal.

Tuscadero: Ooh, I love oatmeal. The kind with the fruit?

Richie: *shakes head* No.

Katie: Sprinkled with cinnamon?

Richie: Uh-uh.

CG: Oh, the maple brown sugar variety!

Richie: Nope.

WD: The PLAIN variety...which is *no* variety. *Frowns*

Richie: *pinching her cheeks* It's good for you! Chachi! Wheel in the breakfast!

*Chachi enters the room pushing a cart bearing trays of bland oatmeal. He begins to hand out breakfast*

Chachi: Eat up, girls...

CG: *Trying to stir the oatmeal* This is disgusting...

Chachi: *whispering to Katie* Sweets, I brought you this bowl of Lucky Charms! Shhh...don't tell anyone. *winks*

Richie: I heard that, Arcola! No playing favorites!

Chachi: Oh yeah, Rich? How come Crystal gets her own room?

Richie: Er...um...well she's really contagious! Hey, I don't need to make excuses to you...I'm your boss! Now vamoose!

*Chachi exits, grumbling as Dr. Fonzie rushes into the room*

Fonz: Cunningham! You're needed in the OR right now!

Richie: Eazy, Fonz. What's going on?

*Fonzie catches a glimpse of CG*

Fonz: Well, helloooo. *Raises eyebrows*

CG: Hey, Doc. *Tries to eat her oatmeal*

Fonz: You're looking much better today...though I think you'll need more "attention" later on.

CG: How about right now? *Brightens*

Fonz: Not until you eat every last bit of that oatmeal. It's good for you, young lady!

CG: Oh come on, Fonz. It's not even edible.

Fonz: Don't make me get tough on you. *Points finger at her*

CG: *Sighs* FINE.

Fonz: That's my girl. *Kisses her forehead*

Richie: What are you DOING! Why am I needed! Stop fooling around!

Fonz: *Slowly turns to face Richie* Excuse me?

Richie: Ah...what I mean is....Sorry.

*Potsie, dressed in a white coat, surgical gloves and mask, a stethoscope, and one of those old-fashioned doctor's mirror headbands, enters the room*

Potsie: Fonzarelli! Cunningham! The operation has started!

Fonz: Oh no...it's worse that I'd predicted!

Potsie: You bet it is!

Richie: What is?

WD: Potsie, *you're* operating?

Potsie: I'm the surgeon here, Daisy.

WD: Are you sure about that?

Potsie: But I wanna operate!

Fonz: You can operate the stethoscope, Webber.

WD: I think I need to be operated on....

Potsie: Where does it hurt?

WD: Everywhere.

Potsie: Wow, that sounds *very* serious....

Richie: POTSIE! Please! Will somebody tell me what is going on?!

Fonz: It's Chad and TF....they arrived in the ER half an hour ago.

Potsie: It's really bad, Rich...we must operate before it's too late.

CG: Too late?! What happened to them?

Fonz: No time to discuss the minor details, GC. Let's move!

Richie: Who'd you leave them with?

Potsie: Ralph.

Richie: *Smacks forhead* Hopefully they haven't heard a Malph joke yet...otherwise it may be too late!

(Richie, Fonzie, and Potsie run out of the room just as Shortcake is entering)

Katie: Feeling better, Shortcake?

*Shortcake falls into her bed*

Shortcake: Hardly...Mr. C forced me to eat this horrible oatmeal...then Mrs. C. forced me to eat *more* oatmeal! I'm going to turn into a...giant oat!

CG: Oh, so you don't want ours?

Tuscadero: Yeah, because we're definitely not going to eat this...stuff. *Looks disgusted*

WD: It looks like this should be used to seal cracks in concrete.

Katie: Toss it in the garbage!

*Just as Katie recommends discarding the oatmeal, Chachi comes in to chage the garbage bag. Katie heaves her oatmeal at the right time...Chachi just misses getting coated in oatmeal*

Katie: Oops. *grins*

Chachi: Yeah, oops is right. You almost got me! Let me move before you throw that...whatever it is...away. *Moves out of the doorway*

Tuscadero: I'm getting rid of this stuff.

WD: Me too.

*Ralph enters the room*

Ralph: Good morning, ladie--

*The oatmeal hits him in the face. Everyone is silent. Chachi begins to laugh*

Chachi: That's a good look for you, Malph.

CG: Sorry about that.

Tuscadero: That's your breakfast, Ralph.

Ralph: But I don't even LIKE oatmeal! *Runs from the room*

LOUDSPEAKER: Paging Dr. Malph, Dr. and Dr. Cunningham, and Chachi Arcola. You are needed in the operating room immediately. CODE BLUE!

Chachi: It's Chad and TF....I hope it's not too late! *Exits*

[Moonlight Lady]

Katie: Oh No! *starts crying*

Chachi: Oh c'mon don't cry baby! *puts his arms around her*

Tuscadero: Our friends *she starts to cry*

CG: Chad *starts crying*

WD: TF! *starts crying*

Shortcake: Please help them Chachi! *starts crying*

Chachi: Please ladies, I can't hold all of you, I only have two arms. Look I gotta go. Everything will be okay. I'll be back as soon as I can.

Jack walks into the ward with flowers for everyone. Hey gang, why are you all crying?

CG: Oh Jack it's terrible *sobs* TF and Chad coded, they're being operated on, it might be too late.

Jack: No it won't don't talk like that. C'mon let's sing a song, that'll cheer us up.

Katie: I don't feel much like singing.

WD: Me neither.

Jack: Oh c'mon.

Invalids: Fine.

Jack pulls out a tape player and hits play. Music begins to play and they start singing.

Invalids and Jack: It's not unusual to be loved by anyone...It's not unusual to have fun with anyone....
but when I see you hanging about with anyone...
It's not unusual to see me cry....

Jack gets an idea, he, Chuck and Bobby help the ladies into their wheelchairs and the go the P.A. system. They sing "It's not unusual into the P.A. and it's piped all over the hospital.

[Stormtracker TF]

Originally posted by Katie_NY
Katie: Oh No! *starts crying*

Chachi: Oh c'mon don't cry baby! *puts his arms around her*

Tuscadero: Our friends *she starts to cry*

CG: Chad *starts crying*

WD: TF! *starts crying*

Shortcake: Please help them Chachi! *starts crying*

Chachi: Please ladies, I can't hold all of you, I only have two arms. Look I gotta go. Everything will be okay. I'll be back as soon as I can.

Jack walks into the ward with flowers for everyone. Hey gang, why are you all crying?

CG: Oh Jack it's terrible *sobs* TF and Chad coded, they're being operated on, it might be too late.

Jack: No it won't don't talk like that. C'mon let's sing a song, that'll cheer us up.

Katie: I don't feel much like singing.

WD: Me neither.

Jack: Oh c'mon.

Invalids: Fine.

Jack pulls out a tape player and hits play. Music begins to play and they start singing.

Invalids and Jack: It's not unusual to be loved by anyone...It's not unusual to have fun with anyone....
but when I see you hanging about with anyone...
It's not unusual to see me cry....

Jack gets an idea, he, Chuck and Bobby help the ladies into their wheelchairs and the go the P.A. system. They sing "It's not unusual into the P.A. and it's piped all over the hospital.

Wow. I sure hope I live

[CollegeGirl]

This is so funny!! Poor Chad and TF....I hope they'll make it through surgery.

[Moonlight Lady]

Yeah me too. I hope we're not next inline for surgery.

[Tuscadero]

Säme here! I wonder why they needed to häve surgery...I'm worried!

Unfortunätely I think we will häve to wäit to write more, until the ä's come bäck.

[Stormtracker TF]

Originally posted by Tuscadero
Säme here! I wonder why they needed to häve surgery...I'm worried!

Unfortunätely I think we will häve to wäit to write more, until the ä's come bäck.

They're back now

[Moonlight Lady]

In the operating room

Dr. Fonz: Scalpel

Nurse: Scalpel

Dr. Fonz: Sponge

Nurse: Sponge:

Dr. Fonz: Clamp

Nurse: Clamp

Dr. Fonz: Do you have to repeat everything?

Nurse: Sorry doctor.

Dr. Ralph: His pressure is dropping.

Dr. Fonz: C'mon TF, hold on buddy!

[*ShortCake*]

ShortCake: If i see any more oatmeal I am going to scream.
Chachi: rolls in with lunch..
ShortCake : whats for lunch?
Chachi: Oatmeal
Shortcake: Screams!!!
Shortcake: I think i will pass.
Mr:C: nope I am forcing you to eat more oatmeal!!
Shortcake: Oh No!!! I may be inline next. I may have to get my stomach pumped from eating too much oatmeal!

[Tuscadero]

Inside the operating room...

Richie: Hurry Fonz, his BP is dropping...rapidly!

Potsie: His vitals are way down, Fonz...

Fonz: I'm working as fast as I can. Webber, hand me that suction...Cunningham, I need you here.

*Richie joins Fonzie as they perform open-heart surgery on TF*

Richie: Webber, Malph...we need your help.

*Potsie and Ralph surround TF's lifeless body. Chachi takes care of TF's oxygen; Mr C. sterilizes instruments and Mrs. C prepares the oatmeal for when TF wakes up. Richie motions for Potsie and Ralph to help with the operation, they both put their hands on TF's chest*

Ralph: AAH! What is that?!

Richie: A hand!

Ralph: TF has a hand growing out of his chest? What kind of operation is this?!

Potsie: That's *my* hand Malph. Stop trying to get fresh with me!

*Ralph pulls his hand away*

Fonz: Richie, put your finger on the left ventricle. Ralph, make sure the valves are stable. Webber, make sure Malph doesn't pass out.

Potsie: Right, Fonz.

*Daphne runs in the room and throws herself on top of TF*

Daphne: My darling! My love! You're on your deathbed! Never again will I touch your sweet lips to mine! Never again will we be together! *She begins sobbing*

Fonz: Chachi! Get her OUT OF HERE! What is this, a three-ring circus? Can't you see that I'm trying to perform open-heart surgery? *Holds up his hands*

Chachi: Ok, ok...geez, do I have to do everything around here? *Rips Daphne from TF* Daphne, he's going to make it...don't worry.

Daphne: But...but...there's something I have to tell you!

Chachi: Not now! I have to get you out of here or else Fonz will flip his lid...again.

Daphne: *Her eyes plead with Chachi* Please?

Chachi: *Sighing, still carrying her* Well, go on.

Daphne: TF can't be allowed to leave this world!

Chachi: I know, I know...you love him--

Daphne: --It's more than that. *Chachi rolls his eyes and carries her out of the operating room. He seats her on a bench and turns to leave* Chachi, wait. TF had asked my father a month ago if he could marry me and he said no.

Chachi: That's awful, but....

Daphne: *Jumping to her feet* He said YES! He changed his mind and now I can marry my cute little snuggle bunny-wunny TF! Father said Yes! So...*she sits down and grows somber*. That's why...that's why I want him to live. We can finally get married and have all of the little TF's that we've been dreaming of.

Chachi: *Looking deep into her eyes* Daphne, don't worry. TF is strong and he'll make it through this...just like the time that you were lost in the snow, he never gave up hope that you would find eachother, and you did! Remember that, ok?

*Daphne nods and embraces Chachi. Katie comes down the hall in the wheelchair*

Katie: What is this? *Chachi jumps to his feet*

Chachi: Sweetie! It's not what you think.

Katie: Anybody who tells someone that it's "not what they think" is usually up to no good. *Taps her foot*

Chachi: I was comforting her...you know that you're the only one for me, Katie.

Fonz: *From the operating room* CHACHI! GET IN HERE! TF IS CRASHING!

*Daphne begins to sob, Katie is confused, Chachi runs back into the operating room*

Chachi: Quick, up his oxygen!

Fonz: Stabilize him, guys...I've still got work to do and I'm not losing this one!

Potsie: Fonzie, he's flatlining!

Ralph: HE'S GONNA DIE!

Fonz: Malph, can it! Now help Webber stabilize the patient. *Ralph and Potsie scramble to get TF's vitals up*

Potsie: He's flatlining! We're gonna have to shock him! Chachi, get the cables!

Fonz: We can't shock him, his chest is open!

Ralph: Well, close it!

Richie: Now everybody just calm down. Everything's intact in the chest cavity...put in a few stitches and let's go!

*Fonzie sews up TF's chest; Chach gets the cables; Richie and Potsie ready TF to be shocked*

Fonz: Everybody ready? Ok, on my count...1, 2, 3...CLEAR!

*TF is shocked. Everyone waits. The air in the operating room is heavy and suffocating. The florescent lights buzz loudly.*

Richie: Get ready...

Potsie: He can't flatline for much longer, dammit! GET A MOVE ON!

Fonz: 1, 2, 3, CLEAR! CLEAR! CLEAR!

Ralph: Oh my God...he's back on line!

*A cheer goes up in the operating room. Fonzie wipes the sweat from his brow and the open-heart surgery continues. Chachi gets close to TF and whispers to him*

Chachi: You're gonna make it buddy...and you're gonna be married! *Grins*

Richie: Married? Daphne?

Chachi: Yeah...her dad finally said yes.

Fonz: I need you guys here, working with me...we gotta get this done--and soon.

END OF PART ONE

[CollegeGirl]

Ohhh....this is getting good! More! More!

[Cactus Jack]

Yeah!

[Tuscadero]

The operating room, where we left our heros...

*Everyone scrambles to the table*

Fonz: Cunningham, take your place. Webber, hand me that scalpel. Thanks. Malph, fasten that hemostat to the artery so that it doesn't squirt when I make the incision.

*Ralph inserts the instrument into the chest cavity and turns very white*

Fonz: Ralph, come on. I haven't got all day.

Richie: Are you ok?

Ralph: I can't...the blood...I can't look at the blood... *Ralph does a dance and falls to the floor*

Fonz: You gotta be kidding me! Chachi, get him out of here...he passed out at the sight of TF's blood.

Potsie: Wow, what a girl! *Laughs*

Fonz: Webber, get serious.

Potsie: Oh, sorry Fonz.

*Chachi drags Ralph out of the OR and heaves him on the bench next to Daphne. Katie has already gone to get the other girls to discuss the episode between Chachi and Daphne*

Chachi: Daphne, you're a nurse...revive him!

Daphne: *Sniffling* OK, Chach. How's my man?

Chachi: A-ok! *Gives her a thumbs-up and heads back into the OR*

Daphne: Ralph...Ralph! Wake up! *Slaps his face, nothing happens* Ok, well I guess I'll just have to administer CPR, you poor thing! *Daphne puts his head on her lap and begins to administer CPR. Katie and Tuscadero are wheeling down the hallway, followed by Daisy, CG, and Shortcake*

Katie: And this is the actual scene where--whoa!

CG: Is Daphne kissing Ralph?

Tuscadero: WHAT? Let me see! *Wheels her wheelchair up to Daphne* And what, pray tell, do you think you're doing?!

Daisy: Wow, she gets around.

*Daphne has just revived Ralph*

Ralph: Ooh...could you um...I think I'm losing consciousness...

Daphne: No, you're fine now. Sit up.

Ralph: Aww, come on...just a little bit? Just one more? I can't bear another breath!

Tuscadero: That's going to be your *last* breath! This time *nobody* is going to save you!

Daphne: Um, this isn't....I'm a certified, registered nurse, just doing my job. Besides...my future husband is in there with his chest ripped open!

Tuscadero: Oh, there's gonna be alot more damage after I'm done with you!

CG: Wait...wait! There must be a logical explination for this.

Katie: Yeah there is; Daphne can't seem to keep her hands off our men!

Tuscadero: *Glaring at Ralph* Well, she can have *him* now.

Ralph: Who?

Tuscadero: YOU!

Ralph: But I thought *you* had me!?

Tuscadero: You should have thought of that before you took her to your own, private, mental Inspiration Point.

Daphne: What is this? My TF is dying in there and nobody cares!

Daisy: Oh my...TF?! How is he?

Daphne: He's stabilized at the moment.

CG: What's wrong with him? *Points to Ralph*

Daphne: He passed out in there...I just revived him. If anything, I saved his life.

Katie: But what about TF? We're not even sure why he's in there.

Daphne: TF and Chad were on there way up here to visit you guys when they got in a horrible accident. They're both in the OR as we speak!

Daisy: CHAD! What about Chad?

Tuscadero: Oh my God...I can't believe were sitting here fighting while TF and Chad are barely hanging on...are you ok, Daphne?

Daphne: Yeah, I'm alright. Listen, I'll run to the nurses desk and see if someone can check on TF and let us know about Chad.

Tuscadero: Thanks, Daph. Wow, now I feel awful.

Katie: So do I...Chachi wasn't trying to do anything but his job.

CG: Look, this has been a long day. Maybe we'll hear some good news about Chad and TF.

Daisy: We haven't heard anything about Chad!

Ralph: *Sitting on the bench* He was stable before I passed out.

Tuscadero: Is he ok?

Ralph: He's fine...we decided to keep him in the OR in case TF needed any blood because they're the same blood type. For awhile there it looked like Chad would be giving up a kidney to save TF...but TF's kidneys are both strong. *Looks at the floor*

Tuscadero: *Wheels up next to him* Um...are we ok?

Ralph: I don't know, are we?

Tuscadero: I'm sorry...I got carried away. I was...well, you know.

Ralph: Jealous? *grins*

Tuscadero: Um...yeah.

Ralph: Well, the only thing that will cure that is a joke. Knock-knock.

Tuscadero: *Rolls eyes and laughs* Oh...I should have known that was coming...

Ralph: Knock-knock.

Tuscadero: Ok...Who's there? *Sighs*

Ralph: Lettuce.

Tuscadero: Lettuce who?

Ralph: Lettuce be on our way! *Laughs*

Tuscadero: Ok...that's really appropriate! I don't even get it...I mean, I get it, but--where would we go? And why--

Ralph:--As in, you, me...alone.

Tuscadero: --I mean, it was funny when I was a kid, but--ohhhhh. Um, ok. *blushes*. I understand.

Ralph: Still mad at me?

Tuscadero: How could I be? *smiles*

CG: Um guys, Daphne's been gone a long time and really think we need to find out how TF and Chad are.

Katie: Maybe the operation is through!

Shortcake: Hopefully they're not being forced to eat oatmeal!

Daisy: Oh boy was that stuff disgusting.

Ralph: Tell me about it, I had to wear it.

Katie: Now *that* was funny!

*Daphne returns with Lori Beth*

LB: What are you girls doing out of your room? Ralph, what are you doing out of the OR?

Daphne: I'll take them back. Come on.

Shortcake: We're sick of being in there! We want to know what's happened to TF and Chad!

LB: I'll give you a full report when they're in recovery. Now, I do believe that it's lunch time. Daphne, get them back into bed and I'll send lunch right down.

Daisy: What's for lunch?

Daphne: Oh, you don't want to know!

[Tuscadero]

Ok, I can't stop.

*Ralph goes back into the OR as Potsie runs out*

Potsie: WAIT! Daphne...come back!

Daisy: Oh no...not him TOO! *Wheels around to face Potsie*

Potsie: I need a DONOR!

*Daphne and the girls come back down the hall to where Potsie is standing, just outside of the OR*

LB: What do you need a donor for?

Potsie: Chad and TF are the same blood type...but Chad's the one who needs a transfusion, not TF.

Shortcake: Oh poor Chad!

CG: But...I thought he was stable.

Potsie: He was...but he sustained some considerable injuries to the head that just bled out more than we'd expected...in fact, he's losing blood pretty fast. I need to find a match!

Daphne: Lori-Beth, go get the syringes, swabs, whatever you can find...I'm going to draw blood from the girls.

Potsie: Oh, the girls! I didn't even see you there...um, hi Daisy. *Blushes*

Fonz: WEBBER! Quit socializing! Let Daphne and Lori-Beth do their jobs...I need you to monitor Chad!

*Potsie runs back to the OR as the girls prepare to get their blood drawn. The halls of the hospital feel empty, bare, almost ghost-like. Will things work out? Will Chad and TF ever be the same?*