Favorite Quotes

[Ohio8]

August: "I am not talking about age, Tommy, I'm talking about maturity.""

[Ohio8]

Tommy: "This ice cream's delicious."
Harry: "Actually, it's sinfully delicious. I would gladly go to Hell for a pint of this."

[MA]

Vicki Dubcek:
How dare you use your flesh to tempt me?

Harry Solomon:
Well, that's what it's there for!

[Ohio8]

Tommy: "I'm an alien, and she's a Presbyterian."

Dick: "Well, I am the high commander."

(Sally sneezes. The guys react.)
Sally: "Wow."
Dick: "What was that?"
Sally: "I don't know, but I want another one."
(Sally sneezes again and reacts like she's having an orgasm.)

Harry: "I'm glad I'm dying."

Martha Stewart: "You're not going to die, and it's a good thing."

Sally: "Destroy the incubator!!"

Harry: "When you face death, you reassess your priorities."

[Ohio8]

Dick: "The man of the hour! (to Jeff) You think you're pretty clever, don't you? I happen to know that every word in your book was published, years ago! Perhaps you've read - the dictionary!"
(Dick slams down a dictionary.)

[Ohio8]

Mary: "I need something from the bar."

Sally: "I killed him."
Dick: "That's just great!"

Mary: "An honest eulogy for that man would be insulting!"

Dick: "Why does death have to be so inconvenient?"

[Ohio8]

Dick: "I'm the high commander. I know what's best for everything."

[Ohio8]

Sally: (to Don)"Just think of me as the wind beneath your ass."

Harry: "Good. Then I get my shot at that whore."

[Ohio8]

Don: "Slow down, Nancy Drew."

[MA]

Tourist:
Excuse me, we've been driving around for hours. Do you know of any hotels that have rooms?

Harry Solomon:
I believe that *all* hotels have rooms.

[Ohio8]

Dick: "I just saw a report on a turkey ranch, and those birds were talking apocalypse."

Dick: "Similar, except no one gets thrown in the sun."

Sally: "What's the point? It's already dead."

Sally: "Admit it, Dick. Everything is about you."

[Ohio8]

Dick: "A stick?"
Harry: "It's a Christmas treee!"
Dick: "That thing?!"

Harry: "Oh, great. Now it's a stick."

Judith: "For the love of God, let him draw again."

Mall Santa: (to Tommy)"Get your hair cut; you look like a girl."

Dick: "Well, tough tinsel!"

Tommy: "That's where I hide Dick's credit card."

[Ohio8]

Sally: "Was it as good for you as it was for me?"

[MA]

Dr. Dick Solomon:
[Dick is beginning to realise that his experiment to normalise his family - and become less "weird" - has failed] This was a mistake. Becoming more average didn't make us more human, it made us less.