Ozzy Writing Autobiography - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Brian Damage · 07-26-2009, 11:29 AM

Ozzy Osbourne is sharing his wild rock life with the world - he's writing an autobiography. The former Black Sabbath star-turned-reality TV personality promises the memoir will be packed with astonishing tales of excess.

In a statement Osbourne, 60, says, "It haunts me, all this crazy stuff. I took lethal combinations of booze and drugs for 30 f---ing years. I survived a direct hit by a plane, suicidal overdoses, STDs. I have been accused of attempted murder. Then I almost died while riding over a bump on a quad bike at f---ing two miles per hour.

"People ask me how come I'm still alive, and I don't know what to say."

The book will his store shelves in October.

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index....utobiography_1

Dr. Thong · 07-26-2009, 12:16 PM

Ozzy will not only need a ghostwriter, but someone else to actually remember this stuff for him.

"Sharon! I can't write no f***in' more! Me pens run out of f***in' ink!"

catlover79 · 07-26-2009, 02:14 PM

Yeah, how much of his life does he actually remember??

Dr. Thong · 07-26-2009, 07:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by catlover79

Yeah, how much of his life does he actually remember??

(Ozzy mutters something unintelligible in reply).

There you go.

TJL · 07-26-2009, 07:46 PM

I hope they let him read it for the audiobook.

Dr. Thong · 07-27-2009, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TJL

I hope they let him read it for the audiobook.

Too bad audiobooks can't have subtitles.

Or maybe they can have a translator.

catlover79 · 07-27-2009, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TJL

I hope they let him read it for the audiobook.

That would be a nightmare.

catlover79 · 07-27-2009, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Thong

Too bad audiobooks can't have subtitles.

Or maybe they can have a translator.

Where are the Berlitz people when you really need them??

Dr. Thong · 07-27-2009, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by catlover79

Where are the Berlitz people when you really need them??

Staying as far away from this project as possible.

catlover79 · 07-27-2009, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Thong

Staying as far away from this project as possible.

I don't blame them.

Dr. Thong · 07-27-2009, 04:07 PM

Some PHD is going to win a nobel peace prize someday when he or she invents the "Universal Ozzy Translator."

You watch. It'll happen.

07-26-2009, 11:29 AM	#1
Brian Damage I'm Rich Bitch Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 03, 2002 Location: What Ain't No Country I Ever Heard Of...They Speak English in What? Posts: 63,108	Ozzy Writing Autobiography Ozzy Osbourne is sharing his wild rock life with the world - he's writing an autobiography. The former Black Sabbath star-turned-reality TV personality promises the memoir will be packed with astonishing tales of excess. In a statement Osbourne, 60, says, "It haunts me, all this crazy stuff. I took lethal combinations of booze and drugs for 30 f---ing years. I survived a direct hit by a plane, suicidal overdoses, STDs. I have been accused of attempted murder. Then I almost died while riding over a bump on a quad bike at f---ing two miles per hour. "People ask me how come I'm still alive, and I don't know what to say." The book will his store shelves in October. http://www.starpulse.com/news/index....utobiography_1
	__________________ The Key to the Kingdom of Heaven: John 3:3 *Money Doesn't Buy Happiness...But I'd Rather Cry in My Private Jet*

07-26-2009, 12:16 PM	#2
Dr. Thong a/k/a "ACK!" Forum Veteran Join Date: Jul 10, 2001 Location: New Hampshire, USA Posts: 5,545	Ozzy will not only need a ghostwriter, but someone else to actually remember this stuff for him. "Sharon! I can't write no f*in' more! Me pens run out of f*in' ink!"
	__________________ "Sunday has been cancelled due to lack of interest. That is all."

07-26-2009, 02:14 PM	#3
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,376	Yeah, how much of his life does he actually remember??
	__________________ "Jesus loves you and He approves this message." "I'm alive. I'm feeling good. I'm trying to live every moment as much as I can." - Valerie Harper, March 2013

07-26-2009, 07:46 PM	#5
TJL Suburbanite Extrordinaire Forum Star Join Date: Dec 29, 2001 Location: New Jersey - the cradle of civilization Posts: 16,591	I hope they let him read it for the audiobook.
	__________________ "I think I'll stroll up to the front to see how the shooting's going..." - Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce Read my blogs! http://centralparkamisguide.com/ http://dvdcriticscorner.com Visit me on Facebook!http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=641138880 Hey, I do the tweet thing too! http://twitter.com/TomLevier My shop of handmade items! http://www.etsy.com/shop/ColdGarageCreations

07-27-2009, 04:07 PM	#11
Dr. Thong a/k/a "ACK!" Forum Veteran Join Date: Jul 10, 2001 Location: New Hampshire, USA Posts: 5,545	Some PHD is going to win a nobel peace prize someday when he or she invents the "Universal Ozzy Translator." You watch. It'll happen.