Cleavers vs. Bronsons - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Michael [hXc] · 06-13-2004, 11:22 AM

This is the first time Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy meet, while seeing their newborn nephew Beaver. Wally is 5. They are in the kitchen eating breakfast. June made pancakes and eggs.

June: "Wally, you'd better get dressed and ready, Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy are coming here today to see your brother. It really is a memorable moment for both of them. Seems like time just flew by so fast. I remember.....

Ward walks into the room

Ward: Good morning June. Good morning Wally. Anything going on today?

June: Well, Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy are coming today. And Ward, please don't upset Aunt Martha in any way. She was the only person like a mother to me. Do it for me.

Ward: But June, why is Aunt Martha allowed to upset us but we can't say anything to her?

June: Well, because we are her only living relatives, and she lives alone and is getting older. We are all she has.

Ward: Excellent breakfast June. Now Wally, go upstairs and change before they arrive.

Wally: Yes Sir.

June: Especially don't say anything when Aunt Martha says how much Wally looks like a Bronson.I know that bothers you.

Ward: June, I know Wally looks like you. I just don't want her associating our sons with her side of the family more. It's Uncle Billy I'm worried about.

June: You know, you are the greatest man I have ever met, Ward. I think Wally and Beaver would be better off if they had more of your attributes than mine. I want them to get married and make their wife as happy as you have made me.

Ward kisses June and then they go upstairs and get ready for the company.

June: Remember what I told you Ward. Don't upset Aunt Martha. They're here now.

June opens door.

Aunt Martha: June! It's been so long since I've seen you. And here's Wallace. He is looking more and more like a Bronson every time I see him!

Trying to be as nice as possible, Ward: Yes, Wally has always taken after June's side of the family.

Aunt Martha: And where's my newborn nephew Theodore?

June walks over and takes him out of his crib in his room.

Aunt Martha: Awwwww! He's so adorable, and look, he has the Bronson eyes too.

June: Actually he looks just like Ward as a baby. Wally looks more like me.

Aunt Martha: And I picked his name too. Named after my brother Theodore who died in 1922. I have spent 28 years without him, and I would like young Theodore to follow in his footsteps.

Ward was feeling jealous, as he was hoping Beaver would be another like him. He ignored Aunt Martha though. The doorbell rang again.

Ward: Oh, that must be Uncle Billy now.

June opens the door.

Uncle Billy: Where's my newborn baby nephew? Hello Ward, June. Don't recall I have ever met her before.

June: This is my Aunt Martha. Aunt Martha, this is Ward's Uncle Billy.

Uncle Billy: And there's Wally. He has grown so fast! I remember when he was Beaver's age there. Wally has always looked so much like your side of the family, June. But now we had Beaver, who is the spittin' image of his father!

Aunt Martha: I want Theodore to become an image of a Bronson just like my brother.

Uncle Billy: Want to hear some of my hunting stories I told to Ward when he was young?

part 2 to be posted later.

desilu #1 · 06-14-2004, 05:30 PM

Oh boy! This could get down right ugly!

Great so far!

Michael [hXc] · 06-14-2004, 06:17 PM

Aunt Martha: Ward, sorry to see that your second baby also looks like a Bronson. But it always works like that. June took after MY side of the family much more. I looked just like June at her age.

Uncle Billy: I thought I was going to tell you a story? Ward, remember when I shot down that grizzly bear on a camping trip? I still have that old gun at my house and I will give it to Beaver when he is older.

Aunt Martha: We are to call him by his proper name. I want to make sure we are taking the honor of my late brother seriously. No need to use foolish nicknames on young children. It is in our family tradition never to shorten people's names. Is that clear?

Uncle Billy: You think I went by my full name as a child?

Aunt Martha: You lower-class person are not a Bronson so you don't know how much it means to me.

Uncle Billy: Are you implying that the Bronson family is BETTER than our side of the family? I hardly doubt what's his name, I mean Theodore, will become like a Bronson as long as he has Ward for a father.

Aunt Martha: You are very unreasonable and apparently don't know how to have a mature conversation.

June: Stop the fighting. How about some tea and cookies? I'll go make the tea.

Ward: And I'll help her.
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06-13-2004, 11:22 AM	#1
Michael [hXc] dying. Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 29, 2004 Posts: 8,532	Cleavers vs. Bronsons This is the first time Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy meet, while seeing their newborn nephew Beaver. Wally is 5. They are in the kitchen eating breakfast. June made pancakes and eggs. June: "Wally, you'd better get dressed and ready, Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy are coming here today to see your brother. It really is a memorable moment for both of them. Seems like time just flew by so fast. I remember..... Ward walks into the room Ward: Good morning June. Good morning Wally. Anything going on today? June: Well, Aunt Martha and Uncle Billy are coming today. And Ward, please don't upset Aunt Martha in any way. She was the only person like a mother to me. Do it for me. Ward: But June, why is Aunt Martha allowed to upset us but we can't say anything to her? June: Well, because we are her only living relatives, and she lives alone and is getting older. We are all she has. Ward: Excellent breakfast June. Now Wally, go upstairs and change before they arrive. Wally: Yes Sir. June: Especially don't say anything when Aunt Martha says how much Wally looks like a Bronson.I know that bothers you. Ward: June, I know Wally looks like you. I just don't want her associating our sons with her side of the family more. It's Uncle Billy I'm worried about. June: You know, you are the greatest man I have ever met, Ward. I think Wally and Beaver would be better off if they had more of your attributes than mine. I want them to get married and make their wife as happy as you have made me. Ward kisses June and then they go upstairs and get ready for the company. June: Remember what I told you Ward. Don't upset Aunt Martha. They're here now. June opens door. Aunt Martha: June! It's been so long since I've seen you. And here's Wallace. He is looking more and more like a Bronson every time I see him! Trying to be as nice as possible, Ward: Yes, Wally has always taken after June's side of the family. Aunt Martha: And where's my newborn nephew Theodore? June walks over and takes him out of his crib in his room. Aunt Martha: Awwwww! He's so adorable, and look, he has the Bronson eyes too. June: Actually he looks just like Ward as a baby. Wally looks more like me. Aunt Martha: And I picked his name too. Named after my brother Theodore who died in 1922. I have spent 28 years without him, and I would like young Theodore to follow in his footsteps. Ward was feeling jealous, as he was hoping Beaver would be another like him. He ignored Aunt Martha though. The doorbell rang again. Ward: Oh, that must be Uncle Billy now. June opens the door. Uncle Billy: Where's my newborn baby nephew? Hello Ward, June. Don't recall I have ever met her before. June: This is my Aunt Martha. Aunt Martha, this is Ward's Uncle Billy. Uncle Billy: And there's Wally. He has grown so fast! I remember when he was Beaver's age there. Wally has always looked so much like your side of the family, June. But now we had Beaver, who is the spittin' image of his father! Aunt Martha: I want Theodore to become an image of a Bronson just like my brother. Uncle Billy: Want to hear some of my hunting stories I told to Ward when he was young? part 2 to be posted later.
	__________________ I'm scared now...is this working out? When my voice is on the way, Who's to think about? I'm scared one day I'll say, "I don't love this anymore," Turn my back on all my fans... Who's to think about? The brighter I shine, the darker my shadows. And they pull me behind, as I let off the pedal. Why should I divide what feels so right? Is this where I want to lay?

06-14-2004, 05:30 PM	#2
desilu #1 Lucy/Desi 4-EVER Forum Regular Join Date: Sep 23, 2000 Location: Battle Creek, Michigan USA Posts: 724	Oh boy! This could get down right ugly! Great so far!

06-14-2004, 06:17 PM	#3
Michael [hXc] dying. Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 29, 2004 Posts: 8,532	Aunt Martha: Ward, sorry to see that your second baby also looks like a Bronson. But it always works like that. June took after MY side of the family much more. I looked just like June at her age. Uncle Billy: I thought I was going to tell you a story? Ward, remember when I shot down that grizzly bear on a camping trip? I still have that old gun at my house and I will give it to Beaver when he is older. Aunt Martha: We are to call him by his proper name. I want to make sure we are taking the honor of my late brother seriously. No need to use foolish nicknames on young children. It is in our family tradition never to shorten people's names. Is that clear? Uncle Billy: You think I went by my full name as a child? Aunt Martha: You lower-class person are not a Bronson so you don't know how much it means to me. Uncle Billy: Are you implying that the Bronson family is BETTER than our side of the family? I hardly doubt what's his name, I mean Theodore, will become like a Bronson as long as he has Ward for a father. Aunt Martha: You are very unreasonable and apparently don't know how to have a mature conversation. June: Stop the fighting. How about some tea and cookies? I'll go make the tea. Ward: And I'll help her. ---------------------------------------------------------------------