Okay, I don't understand my mother one bit. :mad: I know I've had many other threads like this before, but I really do have to rant, and this is the only place I can really do it. You don't even have to read this if you don't want to--I just have to get this out.

Earlier today, I was on the computer, when my mom comes in and says, "Get off the computer. There is no computer today. In fact, you're only allowed 60 minutes a week on the computer." When I protested, she told me I'd have to write a three-paragraph essay on why I should be allowed more time than that.

Three paragraphs? Heck, I'll write her a book!

So I left the room and I just started crying. I was just so incredibly frustrated with my mom. Earlier this school year, she took away my Internet priveleges on school days. I was only allowed on on weekends. So you could imagine my happiness when the school year ended and I was allowed on 7 days a week again! And then, on my second day of summer vacation, she announces that I'm only allowed on for 60 minutes a week. The moment things seem to get better again, she throws something else at me. It's so upsetting. And what confuses me even more is, I can't think of any reason why she would do this! When she needs the computer, I get off. Simple as that.

This will sound lame to most of you, but I simply can't live without the computer and Internet. I have a lot of friends on the Internet (you guys). I have different interests than most teens out there, so I can't go up to one of my friends and have a full length discussion on Sondheim. It's the Internet where I can do that. I think she might want me to actually have a social life, but I don't want one. My interests are my life; therefore, the Internet is my life.

Anyway, I'm done now. Sorry.

Okay. I just now realized that I could have posted that under the whine and complain thread. Ugh. :o Sorry about that.

Thats Ok. But I Understand...let it out..we dont care! :)

I'm sorry ! Maybe she will change her mind. My mom has never taken the internet awaY from me, but I usually don't stay online unless its at night, when she is watching tv, so she really doesn't care, BUT I FEEL YOUR PAIN!:(

I'm sorry,Marisa :( I know parents can be hard to understand - mine certainly are. :lol:

:faint: OMG. That is so incredibly unfair in so many ways, I dont know what to say. If that was my mother Id be beyond pissed. Why dont you have her write you a friggan 3 paragraph essay as to why you can only use the computer for 60 minutes a week! See how she likes it!! Meangya!! Igh, ok Im getting pissed over something that I dont even have to deal with.:crazy:

Thanks for being so understanding you guys. I really appreciate it and it makes me feel better. :) I'm writing the piece of crap essay right now....hopefully she will give in.....

Originally posted by Montana Ponine
Thanks for being so understanding you guys. I really appreciate it and it makes me feel better. :) I'm writing the piece of crap essay right now....hopefully she will give in.....

Good Luck!

Sorry Marissa, that sucks. Hope this makes oyu feel a little better::bighug: :bighug:

why don't you aks your mom why she won't let you use the computer for mroe than 60 minutes. See if she has a good reason. Otherwise try and see if you and her can come up with some sort of compromise.

I know how you feel. My mom is A LOT like that!

Originally posted by Montana Ponine
Thanks for being so understanding you guys. I really appreciate it and it makes me feel better. :) I'm writing the piece of crap essay right now....hopefully she will give in..... lol if you are typing it online let us read it when you are done.

I am totally speechless at the moment. It just sounds completely unfair to me. An essay explaining why you should have more than 60 minutes per week online time? I agree with Crystal. Why doesn't she write an essay explaining why she only allows you to have 60 minutes online time. Totally unfair. I'm sorry. :( I hope she gives in and lets you have more than 60 minutes.

I don't know how old your mom is, but I'm probably older, or at least as old, so here's an adult point of view.

Yes, that's unfair. The limit she is placing on your online time is unreasonably low. It sounds like she has no conception of the Internet and what it offers. Also, she's contradicting herself, if she told you that the restriction was just for the school year, and then took it away from you again when school was over. It sounds like she's throwing her weight around because she can, especially with this stuff about writing essays.

On the other hand, you are wrong if you think that not having a social life is healthy, because it isn't. You should spend some time trying to get one. What you need is some kind of healthy balance between the virtual world and the real one.

Someday soon you'll be on your own and not have to put up with orders from parents, although I imagine they will still try to give them to you. You will have to put up with unreasonable demands from bosses and other people, though, for the rest of your life, because pretty much everyone does. The only thing that might work, in your case, is to try to appeal to her sense of fair play by proposing a compromise. It's no fun having to appease someone who is treating you unfairly, but I think it's your best bet. Be very calm, and mature, and try to get a compromise. If you fail, try again later. Most people will give in to a calm, reasonable, friendly argument sooner or later.

Originally posted by BrandonS
I don't know how old your mom is, but I'm probably older, or at least as old, so here's an adult point of view.

Yes, that's unfair. The limit she is placing on your online time is unreasonably low. It sounds like she has no conception of the Internet and what it offers. Also, she's contradicting herself, if she told you that the restriction was just for the school year, and then took it away from you again when school was over. It sounds like she's throwing her weight around because she can, especially with this stuff about writing essays.

On the other hand, you are wrong if you think that not having a social life is healthy, because it isn't. You should spend some time trying to get one. What you need is some kind of healthy balance between the virtual world and the real one.

Someday soon you'll be on your own and not have to put up with orders from parents, although I imagine they will still try to give them to you. You will have to put up with unreasonable demands from bosses and other people, though, for the rest of your life, because pretty much everyone does. The only thing that might work, in your case, is to try to appeal to her sense of fair play by proposing a compromise. It's no fun having to appease someone who is treating you unfairly, but I think it's your best bet. Be very calm, and mature, and try to get a compromise. If you fail, try again later. Most people will give in to a calm, reasonable, friendly argument sooner or later.
Thanks for that, Brandon. I have to ask something: what, exactly, is the definition of a social life? I say I don't have one, but I do have friends at school, although I barely see them outside of school. I don't talk on the phone, I don't party, I don't go on mall trips. I have friends, and they are wonderful friends, but my social life (if that is even considered one) is relatively small when compared to an average teen's. It just seems that people online understand me a little better than the people I know personally.

I'm somewhere in the neighborhood of what BrandonS suggested. The active attempt at a social life might be a good idea. But you might try to be creative about how you communicate this situation to your mom. There's no doubt that she's throwing her weight around. To make the new rule the minute the old rule is finally over was cruel. She'll make herself believe it's "for your own good" but that doesn't cut it. You should have a say in what's for your own good. By creative I mean for example, have you written that essay yet? If not, or even if you have, sit down, calm down and write another one. Imagine that your feelings and opinions are just as meaningful as your mom's because, of course, they are. Write the essay about why you expect to be and should be allowed to communicate with your mother on an even level. You believe that to be true so try to help her to believe it. After that, hopefully, you and your mom will sit down together and talk over the situation without you being in a no win predicament.

Originally posted by Montana Ponine
Thanks for that, Brandon. I have to ask something: what, exactly, is the definition of a social life? I say I don't have one, but I do have friends at school, although I barely see them outside of school. I don't talk on the phone, I don't party, I don't go on mall trips. I have friends, and they are wonderful friends, but my social life (if that is even considered one) is relatively small when compared to an average teen's. It just seems that people online understand me a little better than the people I know personally.
Just try to focus some of your attention on the people who are there with you face to face. Try to be as friendly and open as you can with the people around you. Be yourself. Try to pay attention to the folks around you and understand how they see the world. Hopefully you will make friends with people who have similar ideas and interests, although sometimes it's fun to be friends with people who are very different. I am only suggesting that you strike some kind of balance between the amount of attention focused on your online friends, like me, and the people who are actually around you.

MY POOR TWIN!!! YOU DOOOOOO HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE!!! ON THE INTERNET!!

That's so unfair, I'd write a book too!!! Hopefully, you two can comprimise.

That is sooo unfair of your mom to do. I mean I can understand maybe restricting the amount of internet a person gets [thank god my parents don't do that though lol] but 60 minutes in a week isn't a lot, especially if you included starting the computer, getting on, etc. I hope your essay convinces your mom to give you more time on the internet!

My only guess is that your mom wants you to be more active in local "real life" activities which is fine to encourage that but I don't think dragging you off the internet cold turkey is the way to do it. Even 60 minutes a day is a small amount of web time. 60 minutes a WEEK is crazy. I'm sorry to see you so upset. I totally understand. Good luck with your essay. I hope it works out for you.

Originally posted by Montana Ponine

Thanks for that, Brandon. I have to ask something: what, exactly, is the definition of a social life? I say I don't have one, but I do have friends at school, although I barely see them outside of school. I don't talk on the phone, I don't party, I don't go on mall trips. I have friends, and they are wonderful friends, but my social life (if that is even considered one) is relatively small when compared to an average teen's. It just seems that people online understand me a little better than the people I know personally.
I have the same kinda social life! Most I do is go to Amandas for cards. Yah, I go out a lot during the week, but its usually by myself. I prefer to do things alone.

I'm sure your mother is doing what she feels is best for you, but an hour a week is extreme. It's unfair. I'd go nuts.
Kitt and BrandonS gave great advice, so I won't be redundant. I hope in the end, your mother sees her way clear to allow you an hour a day, instead of a week.
Good luck.

Perhaps a good guideline would be... the higher your grades in school, the longer you can be on the Internet. (Hopefully, you get good grades.)
60 minutes per week is unfair. That's less than 9 minutes per day. It takes me longer than that just to check and answer my email, and to visit the usual websites I go to everyday.

Oh my goodness...60 minutes a week? That's not one bit fair whatsoever. I could see that maybe your mom wants you just to have more of a social life (like mine, cause I'm kind of the same way...) but I don't think giving you like a few minutes a day on the computer is going to do anything. I mean, the computer is today's way of socializing...IM, message boards and e-mail. Who talks on the phone anymore lol (ok, I know a lot of ppl do but you know what I'm getting at) And to make you write an essay is getting a little on the VERY strict side. That's like, what teachers do...she's your mother for God sakes. I just say try to talk it over with her and work out a compromise...she might listen.

that really sucks. im happy in knowing it could never happen to me because my mother has no clue how to work most of the computer so if she told me that i'd delet her files and stuff. i don't advise trying that though hope it works out for you

Does you rmom know you visit this site and post? Is she does- why not print that post you began this all with? Don't give away the url or she'll spy on you- but that post seems reason enough to let you have more internet time. Did you write the three paragraph essay? Or if your mon isn't too into computers, do something simple to the computer that would prevent the internet from working- your mom asks why it won't work, you spend time looking like you're working hard to fix it, opening top of computer etc for ages- makes it look like you've really worked hard to help fix something- then after a few days, change it bak so the net works- simple as that, maybe then you'll be respected for your dedication and allowed back on. A plan, a plan- you need a plan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Evil Cackly Laugh*

That is insanely unfair, I agree. There is no doubt in my mind that she has the "I'm-the-boss-and-you'll-do-as-I-say-because-you-HAVE-to" mentality. Good luck, hon... you'll need it. Let us know how this all turns out. :)

Oh my god! I know excactly how you feel! I mean we have the same excact problem. My mom took away my computer privledges for three days and I thought I was gonna die. And when she does it shes like "Maybe if It wasnt youre whole life I wouldnt take it away" and grrrrr I hate that because its not my whole life. I just happen to like spending time on the internet cause I dont have many friends where I live, and I dont make friends very easily. But anyway I know excactly how you feel. My mom hasnt said write an essay yet but I wouldnt be suprised if she did. She also keeps telling me I need to get a job so I can "become used to dealing with people." :mad:

Thanks for that, Brandon. I have to ask something: what, exactly, is the definition of a social life? I say I don't have one, but I do have friends at school, although I barely see them outside of school. I don't talk on the phone, I don't party, I don't go on mall trips. I have friends, and they are wonderful friends, but my social life (if that is even considered one) is relatively small when compared to an average teen's. It just seems that people online understand me a little better than the people I know personally.


Montana Ponine
- that statement matches me almost perfectly. Everyone's different- sometimes you wanna go out but couldn't be bothered- I think hanging round with friends in school is enough cos outside they're all different and It's kinda boring hanging out. I have small social life too. I hope your mom gives you back your internet.

Once again you guys, thanks. It's helped me a lot to read your replies.

I gave my mom the essay and she hasn't said a thing about it. :confused: I'd ask her about it, but you know...I'm kind of afraid to. She knows I'm on now...she was in the room a second ago and she didn't say anything.

Maybe she's happy because I actually exercised, for once in my life!