I just love blonde jokes so if you know some post them...Here is one of mine.

One day this blonde walked into a store and said
"I`d like to buy that TV."
The salesman said "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde went home and dyed her hair red. She went back to
the store and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
"Sorry we don't sell to blondes." The man replied again.
She went and dyed her hair black, then returned to the store
and said "I`d like to buy that TV."
Again the man said "Sorry we don't sell to blondes."
The blonde finally asks "How did you know I was a blonde?"
The man said "Because that`s not a TV its a microwave."


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
It's harder to get an ironing board's legs open.

A blonde went into a store and bought a jigsaw puzzle. It took her 2 years to complete it but she was really proud of herself cos it said "5 to 6 years" on the box.

See subject of this post...

Why did the Blonde's navel hurt?
*****
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*****
Because her boyfriend is blonde too;)

A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.
Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?"
"The sucker called again!"

How do you know when a blonde's been in your refrigerator?

There's lipstick on the pickles.

I like this one- :p

A blond woman named Brandi finds herself in dire trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in serious financial trouble. She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray..."God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it. Brandi again prays "God, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."

Lotto night comes and Brandi still has no luck. Once again, she prays..."My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. PLEASE just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order.

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Brandi is confronted by the voice of God Himself: "Brandi, You have to meet me halfway on this... You have to buy a ticket."

Originally posted by Miss Karly
I like this one- :p

A blond woman named Brandi finds herself in dire trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in serious financial trouble. She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray..."God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it. Brandi again prays "God, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."

Lotto night comes and Brandi still has no luck. Once again, she prays..."My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. PLEASE just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order.

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Brandi is confronted by the voice of God Himself: "Brandi, You have to meet me halfway on this... You have to buy a ticket."

:lol: Thats cute...


What do you do when a blonde throws a hand granade at you?
you pull the pin and throw it back then run like hell.

What does a blonde put behind her neck, to make her more attractive?

Her legs

What's a blonde with pigtails?

A blowjob with handle bars.

I have two.

One time a blonde, brunette, and redhead were standing in an elevator when they noticed a man inside the elevator with them who had white flakes all over himself.
"Damn that guy has dandruff!" said the redhead.
"Maybe we should give him some Head and Shoulders" said the brunette.
"Okay!!! Let's do that," said the blonde, "but what is shoulders?"

Second one:

One time a blonde, brunette, and redhead were walking in the forest when suddenly a giant mirror appeared in front of them. A voice said "Tell something to the mirror that you believe is true, and the mirror will give you something valuable if it is. If it is not true, you will be zapped into the mirror."
So, the redhead said, "I think...I'm the prettiest person in the world."

That was not true, so she got zapped into the mirror.

The brunette said "I think... I'm the smartest person in the world."

That was not true, so she got zapped into the mirror.

Then came the blonde. The blonde said "I think..." and then got zapped into the mirror.

Q.How do you get a blonde to laugh at a joke on Saturday?
A. Tell it to her on Tuesday.

Originally posted by Shane West's Angel
I have two...


Both of them were absolutely hilarious! :lol: :rotflmao:

I am a bottle blonde and I love blonde jokes!:lol:


Why did the M &M factory fire the blonde?

She kept throwing away the "W's":crazy:

Originally posted by Brandon
What does a blonde put behind her neck, to make her more attractive?

Her legs

I can do that. :D

Originally posted by Dr. Lu Delgado


I can do that. :D Oh baby.

There was a blonde lady and a brunette lady and a black haired lady. The brunette lady said "i found a beer in my daughter's purse so i think she drinks" the black haired lady said "i found weed in my daughter's purse so i think she smokes" the blonde lady said "i found a condom in my daughters purse so i think she has a dick" :lol:

One day there was a blonde riding a horse. The horse kept going faster and faster until the blonde fell off, with her foot getting stuck in the stirrup. Hearing her screams for help, finally a Wal-Mart clerk came over and turned off the merry-go-round

Originally posted by Babes_Cat
Oh baby.

:lol:

A blonde was riding in the back of a pick-up truck when the truck went off the road and went into a pond. Some neighbors came out to see what happened and waited for the blonde to come out of the water. When she finally did, the neighbors asked her what took her so long. She replied, "I couldn't get the tail-gate unlocked

Okay, 3 women (a brunette, a red-head, and a blonde) just escaped from jail, and they’re on the run. They see a barn, so they go in. They all hide in 3 bags that are in the barn. Well, later on, the cops search around in the barn, and see the bags. 1 cop says, “We should check these bags out”. So, he kicks the bag with the brunette in it, and the brunette goes “ruff, ruff!”. And the cop says “oh, that’s nothing but a bunch of dogs”. So, he kicks the bag with the red-head in it, and she goes “meow, meow”, and the cop goes “oh, that’s nothing but a bunch of cats”. Then, he kicks the bag with the blonde in it, and she goes “Potatoes!”.

One day a blonde, red-head, and a brunette were driving through the desert when all of a sudden their car broke down. They decided they would all walk to civilization. The red-head said, "I'm going to take water so if I get thirsty I can drink it." Then the brunette said, "I'm going to take some food so if I get hungry I can eat." And then the blonde said "I'm going to take the car door, so if I get hot, I can roll the window down!"

How do you drown a blonde?
Put a scratch-and-sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool.

:lol: thats the only one i know

How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?
She's got a tampon behind her ear and hes lookin for a peincil...

It's jokes like these that make me wish I wasn't a natural blonde...ugh...:rolleyes:

I remember listening to some blonde jokes on the Dr. Laura show a couple years back. I'd post some but they would be pretty offensive.

Originally posted by Bonnie Raitt
It's jokes like these that make me wish I wasn't a natural blonde...ugh...:rolleyes:
Awwww dont feel bad. Us blondes are the only ppl w/ an excuse for doing dumb things. ;)

*a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were stuck on a desert island. a genie appears and says he will give each one of them a wish.
The redhead goes first, she says "i wish i could be off this island" her wish is granted.
The brunette says "i wish i could be off this island" her wish is also granted.
The blonde steps up to the genie and says "well now i'm really lonely, so i wish my friends were back."

*four blondes were driving to Disney World, after being in the car for several hours they see a sign that says "Disney World Left" so they turned around and went home.

*What do you call four blondes at a four way stop sign?
An eternity.

*A blonde was sitting home one day doing a puzzle,but she was having trouble with it. She decided to call her boyfriend.
"Help!" she said "Im doing this puzzle and its so hard, all the pieces look the same!"
"Well whats it supposed to look like, whats the picture on the box?" he asked.
"I think its supposed to be a tiger" she replied.
He thought for a minute and then told her what to do: "Well first you should put the Frosted Flakes BACK IN THE BOX!!!!"

*Two blondes were walking in the woods, they saw some tracks in the snow. They were looking at them. One said to the other "I think those are bear tracks" The other disagreed "Nooo, those look like deer tracks" the two stood there arguing for a long time, in fact, they were still arguing when the train hit them.

more later...

Originally posted by Dr. Lu Delgado
How do you know when a blonde's been in your refrigerator?

There's lipstick on the pickles. :lol: :lol: :lol:

*A Brunette was jumping back and forth over some railroad tracks saying "twenty-three, twenty-three, twenty-three....." a Blonde passed by and saw her. Wondering what she was doing, she decided to join her and started jumping back and forth on the tracks yelling out "twenty-three, twenty-three...." A few minutes later a train came, the Brunette dove out of the way. When all was clear, she got up and started jumping back and forth again saying "twenty-four, twenty-four, twenty-four....."

Originally posted by Titania
*A Brunette was jumping back and forth over some railroad tracks saying "twenty-three, twenty-three, twenty-three....." a Blonde passed by and saw her. Wondering what she was doing, she decided to join her and started jumping back and forth on the tracks yelling out "twenty-three, twenty-three...." A few minutes later a train came, the Brunette dove out of the way. When all was clear, she got up and started jumping back and forth again saying "twenty-four, twenty-four, twenty-four....."

:confused: I don't get it.

Originally posted by BJL


:confused: I don't get it.

Your a true blonde lol.... means the brunette has killed 24 blondes because they didn't move out of the way when the train
came....I'm a blnde andeven i kow that :lol:

Originally posted by Brandon
What's a blonde with pigtails?

A blowjob with handle bars.
i dont get it

did you ever stop and think that some people MIGHT be offended by blonde jokes? no wait...apparantly not

This is suppose to be for fun.. So if they get offended Oh well..Q.

How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A. Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

Originally posted by Belladonna
did you ever stop and think that some people MIGHT be offended by blonde jokes? no wait...apparantly not
Did u ever stop and think that reading this topic wouldnt be wise if its gonna offend u?

Why did the blonde become a Muslim?

Because shes always on her knees anyway :lol:

Originally posted by Kelly Osbourne

Did u ever stop and think that reading this topic wouldnt be wise if its gonna offend u?



:lol:

Originally posted by Kelly Osbourne

i dont get it

omg... when a blonde is givin the guy a blow job, he can hold on to her pigtails, like handle bars. OMG........ u must be a blonde urself.

A blonde was going on a plane trip to New York. When the attendant came by and asked for her ticket, she told the blonde,"I'm sorry. Your ticket isn't for first class. Could you please move to your seat." The blonde replied,"Im blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York." The attendant said,"That's fine miss, but you'll have to go to your seat." The blonde responded again, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
This conversation continued, always with the blonde's same response. The attendant got so upset that she went to the captain and told him about the blonde. The captain went and whispered something in the blonde's ear and the blonde immeadiately got up and went to her seat in coach.
The attendant asked the captain how he got the stubborn blonde to move. He said, "I just told her that this part of the plane wasn't going to New York :lol:

Originally posted by Belladonna
did you ever stop and think that some people MIGHT be offended by blonde jokes? no wait...apparantly not

get over it

Originally posted by Joyce Dewitt's#1 Fan
:lol:

:grineyes: Amy is very flexible.

How do you confuse a blonde?
Put her in a circular room and tell her to sit in the corner.

How does a blonde confuse you?
She said she did.

Originally posted by Joyce Dewitt's#1 Fan
A blonde was going on a plane trip to New York. When the attendant came by and asked for her ticket, she told the blonde,"I'm sorry. Your ticket isn't for first class. Could you please move to your seat." The blonde replied,"Im blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York." The attendant said,"That's fine miss, but you'll have to go to your seat." The blonde responded again, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
This conversation continued, always with the blonde's same response. The attendant got so upset that she went to the captain and told him about the blonde. The captain went and whispered something in the blonde's ear and the blonde immeadiately got up and went to her seat in coach.
The attendant asked the captain how he got the stubborn blonde to move. He said, "I just told her that this part of the plane wasn't going to New York :lol:

ive heard that one before and i love it!! lol

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
100, 1 to stir and 99 to peel the M&Ms

Originally posted by Brandon


omg... when a blonde is givin the guy a blow job, he can hold on to her pigtails, like handle bars. OMG........ u must be a blonde urself.
Yeah i am. *stix nose in the air* I have an excuse for being dumb and u dont.

Originally posted by Kelly Osbourne

Yeah i am. *stix nose in the air* I have an excuse for being dumb and u dont.

:rotflmao: YOU GO GIRL!!!

Two blondes and a brunette were escaping from prisonhanging on to the back of a helicopter, when the pilot says "We need to get rid of one person or the helicopter's gonna crash" Anyway, the first two blondes said they didn't want to die, so the brunette sacrificed and let go of the back of the helicopter, then the blondes started clapping.

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Silicon, Mrs.Silicn, that is how I'm known,
Mrs. Silicon cos you can't walk upto me or walk right by me,
You have to walk around,
Silicon, mrs. Silicon, my boobs are, sharp as stone, Mrs.Silicon,
If you walk right to me, right in to me, you're gonna be impaled,
Gonna,gonna be -IMPALED!

What's a blonde's favorite animal?
Their boyfriend

First of all, I have no issue about blonde people at all and do not think that they are dumb. It's nothing but a bunch of hype. Anyways.

This very attractive Blonde woman goes out to her mailbox and goes back with nothing inside her house as the next door neighbor watches her go in while he is cutting grass.

Later that day she goes back to the mailbox and finds nothing again and shuts mail door angrily and marches back in the house.

Later that afternoon she goes back out and open the mailbox to find that there is nothing there and slams it harder than the first two times. Her neighbor asks:

Neighbor: What's Wrong?

She Replies

Blonde woman: My stupid computer keeps saying YOU'VE GOT MAIL!