I believe I found this on the master of all boards, the 1980s hit "The Facts of Life." So, whoever started it, I'm stealing it...

For humor... what would be some things that would never come out of the mouths of Rose, Blanche, Dorothy and Sophia.

Blanche: You know, Dorothy, you are more attractive than me.

Rose: I can't believe the plutonium theory of relativity in conjunction with the supersonic matrices of interplanetary travel

Dorothy: Ma, I would never put you in Shady Pines.

Sophia: Rose, you are so smart and wise. Tell me more about St. Olaf!

Stan: I think I look better bald. What do you think, babe?

Some of those on the FOL board got a little crazy... but funny!!!! So, use your imaginations!! Be creative! Be mean! :)

:rolleyes: double post -- my bad... :rolleyes:

Sophia: Shady Pines Dorothy!

Blanche: Dorothy, I need your advise on men.

Can't think of any for Dorothy and Rose off hand.

Blanche: You mean you're going to sleep with him before you're legally wed? That's disgraceful!


Rose: I'm so glad I'm out of that d@mn one-horse town of St. Olaf...I don't know how I stood it all those years!


Dorothy: This grey hair has GOT to go....I'm going to the beauty shop and have it dyed blond!


Sophia: I miss Shady Pines! I wanna go back!

WARNING! DO NOT TAKE OFFENSE! THIS IS JUST FOR FUN!

Sophia: Stanley, I don't know how Dorothy could divorce you! You're great in the sack.

Blanche: Dorothy come over here. *Slaps rear end*

Rose: Oh Miles. I have a confession. I'm already married, but I want to still keep you, Arnie, Bob, Billy, John, Mark, etc.

Dorothy: Picture it. Brooklyn. 1967. I met my girlfriend Jean and we had sex.

Rose: Dorothy you airhead

Blanche: You can't just sleep with him on the first date Rose

Dorothy: I have a problem and I need your Advice Rose

Sophia: I Love being old

Blanche: What? I can't go out with two men in the same week, people will think I'm a slut.

Rose: Back in St. Olaf...ah screw it, that town was full of nuts anyway.

Dorothy: I'm going shopping at Saks.

Sophia: Let's go visit the nice people at Shady Pines

Blanche: Dorothy, I wish I had your New York charm.

Rose: So what if my father was a monk. I'd still marry that little Jewish midget!

Sophia: You know, Dorothy, I don't like that word "pussycat."

Dorothy: I think I'll wear heels tonight. It will give me some extra heighth.

Originally posted by Ricky Ricardo
WARNING! DO NOT TAKE OFFENSE! THIS IS JUST FOR FUN!

Sophia: Stanley, I don't know how Dorothy could divorce you! You're great in the sack.

Blanche: Dorothy come over here. *Slaps rear end*

Rose: Oh Miles. I have a confession. I'm already married, but I want to still keep you, Arnie, Bob, Billy, John, Mark, etc.

Dorothy: Picture it. Brooklyn. 1967. I met my girlfriend Jean and we had sex.

LOL! Very funny!

Originally posted by Superbatboy
Rose: Dorothy you airhead

Blanche: You can't just sleep with him on the first date Rose

Dorothy: I have a problem and I need your Advice Rose

Sophia: I Love being old

LOL - Those are some AWESOME lines you would never hear them say.

Blanche - I believe I am getting fatter, and more wrinkled
Dorothy- I think beauty is more important than brains
Sophia- I miss the hell out of shady pines
Rose- I admit it - I am a moron
Stanley- Women,,,, not me, not ever babe!

Here's my contribution.

Blanche:I'm not really 45, I'm actually 50.

Dorothy:Rose, please tell us more about St. Olaf!

Blanche:I have a date with handsome, rich, eligible man tonight, but I'm not that interested.

Kristen

Dorothy -- Here Ma -- A big-screen TV!

Blanche -- I think I'll just buy an inflatable doll and eat popsicles everyday

Sophia -- I made a man out of Julio Iglesias!

Rose -- Is it just me or has my hair not moved since 1968?

bump. :)

Kiss me fool :kiss:

Sophia: Dorothy, Let's watch Designing Women tonight...I love those sassy accents!

Dorothy: Ma, here's the car keys. I want you to
pick up my drycleaning....and don't
forget the phonebook so you can sit on it and
see over the steering wheel....


Blanche: I think I'll just curl up with a good book
and stay home even though it is Saturday night...
Who needs men when I have such fine ladies at
home who can keep me company?


Rose: I'm fond of you too, Jean...let's snuggle up and
give it a whirl! I might like it!

Sophia: Rose, let me try some of that shanookancrockin...
mmmmm.....! Much better than anything I could ever
cook!

Originally posted by Georgia's on my Mind
Sophia: Dorothy, Let's watch Designing Women tonight...I love those sassy accents!

Adding on...........

Sophia: I'd love to sleep with that brunette.

Originally posted by Superbatboy
Dorothy: I have a problem and I need your Advice Rose

[/B]

Minor Flag on the play. Dorothy has asked Rose for advise before.

Anyway, here's mine:

Sophia: Dorothy, you and Stan make such a great couple. God Bless your covenant of remarraige.

Blanche: My word, I look old. Almost as old as Aunt Fran on that "Mama's Family" show.

Rose: I want to thank all my friends and family and to all of you for the Nobel Peace Prize Award.

Dorothy: Oh, Ma. I've got three dates in the same week and the great part about it is........they all know what I look like too!

bUmP.:lol:

Blanche: I get really tired of dating sometimes. It's not exciting anymore.
Sophia: Pussycat, you're beautiful, charming, and smart.
Rose: I have decided to never tell stories about St. Olaf again b/c no one really cares.
Dorothy: Ma, I love you so much that I will never again consider committing you to Shady Pines.

Dorothy: Man, I Feel Like a Woman

Blanche: Luck be a Lady Tonight

Sophia: I Wish I Was 18 Again

Rose: Darling I Love You But Give Me Park Avenue

Dorothy: Sure, Stan, give an inkpen. I'd be MORE than happy to sign that prenuptual agreement.

Blanche: I wish all these stupid georgous men would stop calling me and hounding me for dates! All they want is sex, sex, and more sex....I wish I were a nun!

Rose: Back in St. O..............please, girls, don't make me tell another one of these stories!

Sophia: My favorite show? "Designing Women"!

Sophia: "I hate pepperoni. I want Lutefisk for dinner!"

Rose: "That reminds me of a story back in Sicily. The Fellini brothers, Giovanni and Mario..."

Blanche: "I am getting a bit fat, don't you think?"

Dorothy: "Iam sorry that I am so sarcastic!"

Dorothy: You know, we could all take a lesson from Gene Shalat's hairdresser.

Blanche: Hi my name is Blanche and I'm a proud member of PFLAG.

Rose: Ok help me out here. Did I or didn't I get a high school diploma/GED/College degree

Sophia: Dorothy, I really did look at the results. You aren't my daughter.

Blanche: (singing) ".....I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy....I'm a Yankee Doodle Gal....."......Oh, I love that song, I could just sing it all day long!

Blanche: Rose, I'll be happy to tell you my age, as long as you tell me your weight!

Rose: 153.

Blanche: 54.
:D

Sophia: Hey, we don't want to miss that Suzanne Sommars special! Rose what's keeping your delicious Gaflurkinurkin cake?

Blanche: "George and I named our first dog Ulysses, after the wonderful Civil War hero Gen. Ulysses S. Grant."

Dorothy -- I think I'll sing the soprano part.

Rose -- St. Olaf wasn't that great. Give me Las Vegas any day!!

Sophia -- I'm too old to turn men on!

Blanche -- I'm too old to turn men on!

:crazy:

OK here's my try:

Blanche: Dorothy, I cancelled my date tonight with Mel Bushman.....I love the way your butt looks in that dress!!

Dorothy: Great news girls! I've forwarded my resume to the St Olaf school district.

Rose: The circus is in town, but I've decided to attend the next Mensa meeting.

Sophia: Let's call Domino's....I'm starving!

bump