Frank Gannucci
12-21-2020, 07:09 AM
A Honeymooners XMas Eve:
(Ralph & Ed are on Ralph's bus. Ralph is assigned to drive people from Newark Liberty International Airport.)
Ralph: "Norton, you really didn't have to accompany me on this trip. Thank you."
Ed: "What are friends for Ralph-ie boy? Especially during this time of year."
Ralph: "I couldn't agree more."
Ed: "You should have seen what I gave Trixie's mother fro XMas. It was an organge juice squeezer. It's practical too. You squeeze the orange on Napolean's head and the juice squirts out of his ears."
Ralph: "That is great Norton. Here are my first group of passengers."
(They all board the bus.)
Ralph: "Look at all the snow Norton. I sure hope it's safe to drive. I sooo wish I was driving in Miami Beach. I heard that Miami Beach has got the greatest roads in the world."
(Crowd cheers.)
Ralph: "All aboard."
(They all board.)
(Many hours later, they are stranded on the George Washington Bridge. The bus breaks down.)
Ralph: "Norton, the bus broke down. I don't have any cell phones and if we did, how can people save us?"
Ed (yells): "HEY DOES ANYONE HAVE A CELL PHONE? MY BUDDY IS STRANDED ON XMAS EVE HERE."
Man (yells): "WHAT? YOU BETTER GET THIS BUS STARTED MAN. I AM MISSING MY FAMILY."
Ralph (yells): "I AM MISSING MY FAMILY TOO. I MISS MY MOTHER-IN-LAW...OKAY, MAYBE I DON'T MIND MISSING HER."
Ed (yells): "I GOT AN IDEA. I WORK IN THE SEWER. WHY DON'T WE ALL DISPERSE AND GO DOWN THE SEWER? I KNOW MY WAY AROUND TOWN DOWN THERE."
(They all shake their heads.)
Ed (yells): "COME ON, EVEN MY BUDDY CAN FIT THROUGH A MANHOLE."
Ralph (yells): "NORTON, DO YOU WANNA GET YOURS NORTON?"
(Meanwhile, at the Kramdens XMas party, everyone is watching the local news. They see Ralph's bus is stranded.)
Trixie: "Oh, I hope my Ed comes here. I want him here."
Alice: "Me too as well as Ralph. I would call him but apparantly his cell phone's battery died."
Alice's Mom: "Serves him right for not getting a good battery."
Alice: "What's going to happen?"
(To be continued.)
(Ralph & Ed are on Ralph's bus. Ralph is assigned to drive people from Newark Liberty International Airport.)
Ralph: "Norton, you really didn't have to accompany me on this trip. Thank you."
Ed: "What are friends for Ralph-ie boy? Especially during this time of year."
Ralph: "I couldn't agree more."
Ed: "You should have seen what I gave Trixie's mother fro XMas. It was an organge juice squeezer. It's practical too. You squeeze the orange on Napolean's head and the juice squirts out of his ears."
Ralph: "That is great Norton. Here are my first group of passengers."
(They all board the bus.)
Ralph: "Look at all the snow Norton. I sure hope it's safe to drive. I sooo wish I was driving in Miami Beach. I heard that Miami Beach has got the greatest roads in the world."
(Crowd cheers.)
Ralph: "All aboard."
(They all board.)
(Many hours later, they are stranded on the George Washington Bridge. The bus breaks down.)
Ralph: "Norton, the bus broke down. I don't have any cell phones and if we did, how can people save us?"
Ed (yells): "HEY DOES ANYONE HAVE A CELL PHONE? MY BUDDY IS STRANDED ON XMAS EVE HERE."
Man (yells): "WHAT? YOU BETTER GET THIS BUS STARTED MAN. I AM MISSING MY FAMILY."
Ralph (yells): "I AM MISSING MY FAMILY TOO. I MISS MY MOTHER-IN-LAW...OKAY, MAYBE I DON'T MIND MISSING HER."
Ed (yells): "I GOT AN IDEA. I WORK IN THE SEWER. WHY DON'T WE ALL DISPERSE AND GO DOWN THE SEWER? I KNOW MY WAY AROUND TOWN DOWN THERE."
(They all shake their heads.)
Ed (yells): "COME ON, EVEN MY BUDDY CAN FIT THROUGH A MANHOLE."
Ralph (yells): "NORTON, DO YOU WANNA GET YOURS NORTON?"
(Meanwhile, at the Kramdens XMas party, everyone is watching the local news. They see Ralph's bus is stranded.)
Trixie: "Oh, I hope my Ed comes here. I want him here."
Alice: "Me too as well as Ralph. I would call him but apparantly his cell phone's battery died."
Alice's Mom: "Serves him right for not getting a good battery."
Alice: "What's going to happen?"
(To be continued.)