Carlton: Drinking doesn't cause hangovers; stopping drinking causes hangovers.

http://ashevillegrit.com/sites/default/files/styles/600wide/public/BLOGMAINPHOTOS/unnamed.png?itok=tf7-Rtd4

Rhoda: "Uh, I would like to see that."

Carlton: Hello, this is Carlton your doorman.

Rhoda: Ohhh WOW


When Joe announced he wanted to go off by himself for awhile.

[Vince is playing his accordion for Brenda]

Brenda Morgenstern:
Vince, this is so much trouble you go to. I mean, why lug your accordion all the way here when I can just put on some records or something?

[At Rhoda’s Bridal Shower]

“I jog everyday, I eat only organic food, and I have sex on a regular basis.”

[Ida is getting ready to be examined by a doctor]

Dr. Henry Gerber:
How old are you?

Ida Morgenstern:
Guess.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Do you know how many patients I have waiting for me out there?

Ida Morgenstern:
I'll guess that when you guess my age.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
50.

Ida Morgenstern:
7.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
You're 57-years-old?

Ida Morgenstern:
No. I thought you had 7 patients waiting out there.

[slight pause]

Ida Morgenstern:
I'm 52.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Thank you.

LOL, Ida Morgenstern is the best. She practically steals the show. Thank you for sharing. If you have any more Rhoda quotes, I'd love to see. :)

LOL, Ida Morgenstern is the best. She practically steals the show. Thank you for sharing. If you have any more Rhoda quotes, I'd love to see. :)

No problem. :) I'd be happy to find more Rhoda quotes for you.

Benny & Brenda:

Rhoda:

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Should we go into the examination room?

Ida Morgenstern:
Alright, where's the woman who's going to examine me?

Dr. Henry Gerber:
I'm going to examine you.

Ida Morgenstern:
You? Why?

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Why? Why do you think?

Ida Morgenstern:
Because I think you get your kicks from seeing a woman my age naked.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Mrs. Morgenstern, I examine naked people all day long. I've been doing it for over 20 years.

Ida Morgenstern:
Aw, come on doctor, you mean to say if uh, you don't see an extrordinary body, you don't let that stethoscope linger a little?

Rhoda & Carlton:

“[after a date with Hal Baxter] I made the mistake of asking him which was his bad side. You know, we looked for it for ten minutes. We couldn't find it. We found mine right away, though. It's the front.”
— Rhoda Morgenstern

Gary & Rhoda:

Rhoda: If I felt that way I’d never go to a Paul Newman movie.

Gary and Brenda:

“Rhoda: My father's short.

Mary: See, it didn't bother your mother did it?

Rhoda: Bother her? She made him that way.”

Rhoda: OK, I’ll take Geography for $100, Art.

Brenda: OK… Mount McKinley.

Rhoda: That’s the highest mountain in America.

Gary: OK, wait a minute. You have to say it in the form of a question. Those are the rules. It has to be a question.

Rhoda: That’s the highest mountain in America… isn’t it?

[while Vince and Brenda are kissing in the apartment, Rhoda knocks on the door. Brenda answers it]

Rhoda Morgenstern Gerard:
Aw, listen, I didn't mean to interrupt... I mean busting in on you and, uh...

Brenda Morgenstern:
...Vince.

Vince Mazuma:
Hey, don't worry about it. If anything was really going on, we wouldn't have heard the knock.

Brenda:

[Ida is getting ready to be examined by a doctor]

Dr. Henry Gerber:
How old are you?

Ida Morgenstern:
Guess.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Do you know how many patients I have waiting for me out there?

Ida Morgenstern:
I'll guess that when you guess my age.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
50.

Ida Morgenstern:
7.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
You're 57-years-old?

Ida Morgenstern:
No. I thought you had 7 patients waiting out there.

[slight pause]

Ida Morgenstern:
I'm 52.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Thank you.

Gary & Rhoda:

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Do you have any allergies?

Ida Morgenstern:
I'm allergic to little bottles.

Dr. Henry Gerber:
Then I'll get you a big one.