[first lines]

Hazel: Hi, Laurie.

Laurie: Hi, Hazel.

Hazel: Oh, these your hopscotch squares?

Laurie: No, I'm too old for hopscotch.

Hazel: Oh, you are? I ain't.

[she hopscotches on the squares and goes on her way]

[last lines]

Harriet Johnson: Herbert?

Herbert Johnson: Yes, Harriet?

Harriet Johnson: The fireplace seems to be smoking again.

Dorothy: Now wait a minute. Now why do we have to go to all the trouble of keeping it a secret from George. Why don't we just tell him?

Hazel: "Ain't that a doozie"

Harvey Griffin: [annoyed wtih Hazel's constant interuptions] You wouldn't work for me for two minutes!

Hazel Burke: You're darn tootin', I wouldn't.

George: "Well, as long as she's beautiful."

George: "Well, I don't want a herd of reindeer on my front lawn."

Hazel: "Well, I have to. I can't afford to buy them."

George: "Well, Hazel, I guess your propaganda's been falling on deaf ears."

Miss Scott: "I just adore Christmas, don't you? All that lovely loot."

[series' final lines]

Ted:
[enters office and sits on edge of Millie's desk, while she sits behind it] Now, where were we?

Millie Ballard:
We were just talking about my favorite subject - me.

Hazel (on phone): Mr. Baxter ain't here.

Dorothy: Mr. Baxter ISN'T here.

Hazel (on phone): The Mrs. just confirmed it; Mr. Baxter ain't here.

Harriet Johnson: The fireplace seems to be smoking again.

Hazel Burke: [Hazel think Mr. B. is fooling around] Cupid ain't flying around tonight if I can help it.

Hazel: It's a shame to have terrific homemade pie go to waste.
George: You always have been modest, Hazel.
Hazel: Oh, what's so good about being modest? If your horn has a good tone, blow it.

Hazel: "If I could have gone to college, I think I would have studied to be a brain surgeon. It seems to me that's where all the work needs to be done."