Sean Hayes Says He Owes Gay Community Apology for Coming Out Too Late
The Huffington Post | by Cavan Sieczkowski
10/28/13


Three years ago, Sean Hayes publicly came out as gay, but the former "Will & Grace" star thinks it wasn't soon enough.

In a recent interview with the Los Angeles Times, the actor was asked about the controversy surrounding his "Will & Grace" character, Jack McFarland, and the fact that he might be "too gay."





"I was so young," Hayes said. "It made me go back in the closet [with the media] because I was so overwhelmed at 26 or 27. I didn't want the responsibility, I didn't know how to handle the responsibility of speaking for the gay community. I always felt like I owed them a huge apology for coming out too late.

Some people in the gay community were very upset with me for not coming out on their terms. They don't stop to think about what's going on in somebody's personal life, and the struggles that they're having. It was all very scary. We got death threats. It was a really rough time for me, but I was also having the time of my life."





The 43-year-old faced years of criticism from The Advocate and other media outlets following the debut of the show in 1998 for his failing to address the "open secret" that was his sexual orientation, Us Weekly previously noted.

But in 2010, Hayes defended himself in an interview with The Advocate saying: “I am who I am. I was never in, as they say. Never." Adding, “I feel like I’ve contributed monumentally to the success of the gay movement in America, and if anyone wants to argue that, I’m open to it. You’re welcome, Advocate.”





Now, in his new NBC series, "Sean Saves the World", he plays a single gay father raising a teenage daughter. Although the plotline may be progressive, he claims he isn't trying to tout any message about gay parenthood, even though he is more honest about his own lifestyle nowadays.

"I want to make people laugh first, and that's it," he explained to the LA Times. "If a byproduct of that is enlightening somebody to something they wouldn't otherwise have been exposed to, then great, but that's certainly not the agenda or the intent of the show."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/28/sean-hayes-gay-community-apology_n_4169745.html?

I admire him, Neil Patrick Harris and Matt Bomer!

He put too much pressure on himself. Him coming out on his terms was up to him.

He put too much pressure on himself. Him coming out on his terms was up to him.

Agreed. He doesn't owe anyone an apology.

Agreed. He doesn't owe anyone an apology.i agree he he does not owe anyone anything

He shouldn't be ashamed. He is who he is.

A good percentage, perhaps even a high percentage of actors are gay. It hasn't hurt anyone who came out in the last how many years? Viewers know a good number of the actors are, so it is not exactly a shock. I just want a good show that does not push agendas, I could care less what the actors do at home. Of course what they reveal about their private lives is up to them and the public should respect that regardless of whether they are straight or gay, in or out.
They are just doing their jobs, why do so many people care what they do in private?

If anything, the gay community owes him an apology for pushing him to come out when he wasn't ready. Coming out can very difficult and everyone handles it differently. If a person is struggling with whether or not to come out, force is never the solution.

He doesn't owe an apology to anyone, except maybe himself--and only if he WANTED to come out sooner but was too afraid.

We the viewing public, owe him a rousing ovation for the magnificent job he did with the role. A very very ultra-talented actor.

Some segments of the gay community are getting way too radical. Nobody should feel pressured to reveal their private life if they do not want to.

He had no obligation to come out at all. It is a personal choice on when you decide to come out. If you are comfortable to come out in high school that is fine and you you decide to come out when you are 80 that is fine too. You have to be comfortable with yourself to do this.

That's true.

He should most definitely apologize for coming out too late. He should have announced it the second he step foot on the set. You can't have it both ways, Sean!

He should most definitely apologize for coming out too late. He should have announced it the second he step foot on the set. You can't have it both ways, Sean!

Never criticize a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins.

He should most definitely apologize for coming out too late. He should have announced it the second he step foot on the set. You can't have it both ways, Sean!
He is entitled to his private life as he wants it. He stepped foot on the set as an actor and did his job. That is all he owed anyone in the tv biz or the public.
I did not care for the show and I'm straight, but I'm not going to judge the man he makes his own decisions.

Never criticize a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins.
That would make a great experiment. Than we would know how he feels.

He is entitled to his private life as he wants it. He stepped foot on the set as an actor and did his job. That is all he owed anyone in the tv biz or the public.
That‘s the way it USED to be, but those cherished days are behind us. The day of the silent gay or the secret gay is finished, over, done & thru. Nowadays, you either voluntarily come out or you will be OUTTED. There's no “silent minority" anymore. Now it's "stand and face the music"; plain and simple.

Never criticize a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins.

......then you'll be a mile away from him, and you'll have his moccasins.:lol:

But seriously, I agree. Its his choice to come out or not come out.

I could care less what the actors do at home.

I do care less. :lol:

As loud a group the LBGT has become means that no gay, lesbians, bi-sexuals or trans-gendered are allowed to hide in the closet anymore. If you want the same rights and legal benefits as everyone else, you must STAND AND BE COUNTED. You CAN'T have it BOTH ways.

By him coming out, he still can't have it "both ways" because of the laws. So if he was closeted or not, depending on the state, "having it both ways" is not even legally possible.

By him coming out, he still can't have it "both ways" because of the laws. So if he was closeted or not, depending on the state, "having it both ways" is not even legally possible.

. . . . . .like you said, "Depending on the State". . . . .

In New York, he has it both ways, in Pennsylvania, just an hour away, he does not.