My sister is 17 years old and she's inherited an idiot gene. Her boyfriend who's 18 has cheated on her at least six times, they've broken up at least six times, and she's taken him back at least six times. I treated this kid well the first time, even the second time...I STILL do if I'm forced to say hi or something. He's over our house everyday, sleeps over everyday...our house is tiny, there's no privacy but now I have to basically live with this punk. So I bitch about it to my mom, and all she has to say is that I'm mean hearted. She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are. You can't expect people to be perfect, blah blah. He makes your sister happy so that's fine.

So I'm sitting here crying now because she just made me feel like a horrible human being because I don't let **** like that fly. I don't give sixth, fifth, fourth, third, or even second chances sometimes. My sister could do better. So I don't want him in the house constantly, I'm mean hearted. It's not like I even act rude to him, though I should. I'm too nice to him. I just don't understand how my mom and sister could be so completely stupid. Or are they right? Am I just some mean hearted, horrible person?

I don't think that you are a mean hearted person in the slightest. Infact, I think both your mother and sister are a little bit clueless. And it is certainly not true that all guys cheat.

Why your mom lets your 17 yr old sister's boyfriend sleep over is beyond me. Your Mom sounds weird, sorry. Does the creep aka boyfriend work or pay rent to your mom?
It just bugs me that people settle for less than they deserve :mad:

David

No, you're not mean-spirited. The punks seems to have bamboozled both your sister and your mother. I hate to say this, but I agree with David. When I was 17, I would never be able to have a boyfriend sleep over, much less every night.

She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are.
what on earth? this guy is 18, not 12. he should know better. cheating is a behavioral trait, not a character trait.

you're not mean-hearted at all. quite the opposite i think. it sounds like you're just the only one living in reality. your sister may have to learn from her own mistakes, however many it may take.

what on earth? this guy is 18, not 12. he should know better. cheating is a behavioral trait, not a character trait.

you're not mean-hearted at all. quite the opposite i think. it sounds like you're just the only one living in reality. your sister may have to learn from her own mistakes, however many it may take.

No, you are not mean hearted or anything. I'm not a guy but I really don't think all guys cheat.

And your sister needs to get a clue but I guess she just doesn't see that her boyfriend is not really for her.

He's really good at acting polite. He doesn't live here, but he might as well. He does stuff around the house, I'll give him that...but that isn't going to change my mind. It's just so frustrating that my mom and sister have to be so stupid sometimes. Christ, I love them both...but they both say and do some stupid things.

My sister is 17 years old and she's inherited an idiot gene. Her boyfriend who's 18 has cheated on her at least six times, they've broken up at least six times, and she's taken him back at least six times. I treated this kid well the first time, even the second time...I STILL do if I'm forced to say hi or something. He's over our house everyday, sleeps over everyday...our house is tiny, there's no privacy but now I have to basically live with this punk. So I bitch about it to my mom, and all she has to say is that I'm mean hearted. She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are. You can't expect people to be perfect, blah blah. He makes your sister happy so that's fine.

So I'm sitting here crying now because she just made me feel like a horrible human being because I don't let **** like that fly. I don't give sixth, fifth, fourth, third, or even second chances sometimes. My sister could do better. So I don't want him in the house constantly, I'm mean hearted. It's not like I even act rude to him, though I should. I'm too nice to him. I just don't understand how my mom and sister could be so completely stupid. Or are they right? Am I just some mean hearted, horrible person?

No offense, but your mom is being an idiot. It pisses me off when women say that all guys cheat, it's what they do, they're all pigs, blah blah blah. It's a slap in the face toward those of us that don't cheat.

No, you are definitely not a horrible person, at all. But at this point, your sister just plain has it coming.

He's really good at acting polite. He doesn't live here, but he might as well. He does stuff around the house, I'll give him that...but that isn't going to change my mind. It's just so frustrating that my mom and sister have to be so stupid sometimes. Christ, I love them both...but they both say and do some stupid things.

I was thinking though... I don't know when you graduate High School, you could always think that you can move with a friend when you start college.. if you decide to go and stuff.

I hope you don't mind me asking but did your mom and dad divorce? Did your dad cheat on your mom or something.

I'm sorry for asking like that about your dad.

I was thinking though... I don't know when you graduate High School, you could always think that you can move with a friend when you start college.. if you decide to go and stuff.

I hope you don't mind me asking but did your mom and dad divorce? Did your dad cheat on your mom or something.

I'm sorry for asking like that about your dad.
I'm actually already in college. I'm home on break.

And no, I don't mind. My parents are divorced...not because of cheating, my dad's just a jerk. My mom's serious boyfriend after that turned out to be a jerk, too. I'd say neither my sister nor my mom know how to pick them.

And my dad's no help. He hates the guy my sister's dating, and he hates that he's over here...but all he does is whine about it, he doesn't intervene. He doesn't live here so I guess it's not much of a problem for him.

My sister is 17 years old and she's inherited an idiot gene. Her boyfriend who's 18 has cheated on her at least six times, they've broken up at least six times, and she's taken him back at least six times. I treated this kid well the first time, even the second time...I STILL do if I'm forced to say hi or something. He's over our house everyday, sleeps over everyday...our house is tiny, there's no privacy but now I have to basically live with this punk. So I bitch about it to my mom, and all she has to say is that I'm mean hearted. She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are. You can't expect people to be perfect, blah blah. He makes your sister happy so that's fine.

So I'm sitting here crying now because she just made me feel like a horrible human being because I don't let **** like that fly. I don't give sixth, fifth, fourth, third, or even second chances sometimes. My sister could do better. So I don't want him in the house constantly, I'm mean hearted. It's not like I even act rude to him, though I should. I'm too nice to him. I just don't understand how my mom and sister could be so completely stupid. Or are they right? Am I just some mean hearted, horrible person?
That's how boys are???? You have got to be kidding me. Your mom just sent women back 100 years. Ugh...barf.

I don't think you're being mean at all. I'd tell him to go get his own house or start paying rent. I doubt I'd be very nice to him either, so you're better than me. Ugh...what a loser!

Not mean-hearted at all. If I were you, I'd actually be asking your mom why the hell she lets a 17yo have her boyfriend SLEEPING OVER. That kind of **** isn't supposed to fly when you're still in high school - and I'm assuming she's still in high school (HS senior, yeah?). Do they get to sleep in the same bed and all that? Because geez. Save that stuff for college. If *I* had a 17yo daughter, no way in hell I'd let her get away with THAT. In fact, I'd make sure she only had a twin-sized bed until she moved out.

I had a roomie... she has been dating this guy for uhhhh... 4 1/2 years by now? It wasn't bad when we moved in together. He'd come over and spend the night with her 2x, 3x a week, if that. And keep in mind I was 22 and she was 23 and we were both past the age of being undergrads. So, ya know, whatever. But in the last 3ish months or so that we lived together, the frequency of his visits would increase. To the point where I'm thinking to myself, "Where's YOUR share of the rent, bitch?" because he was sleeping here so much, leaving his food and possessions here, etc. I'm like, "Uhhhhh... when I moved in with my roomie, I was under the assumption it was just going to be me and her. That there would be no live-in boyfriend." *sigh*

THANK GOD I was sick over Thanksgiving... That was the last full week I lived with her (she was and is a GREAT roomie... it was her boyfriend I had problems with). When I was sick, her boyfriend didn't come to our place. At all. So I could recover in peace and not have to shove his **** out of the way, in the fridge, etc.

Ugh. WHen I move out again, I am gonna get my own freaking apartment. So nobody has to give a **** if I have a live-in boyfriend or anything like that. Jesus.

I'm actually already in college. I'm home on break.

And no, I don't mind. My parents are divorced...not because of cheating, my dad's just a jerk. My mom's serious boyfriend after that turned out to be a jerk, too. I'd say neither my sister nor my mom know how to pick them.

And my dad's no help. He hates the guy my sister's dating, and he hates that he's over here...but all he does is whine about it, he doesn't intervene. He doesn't live here so I guess it's not much of a problem for him.

Oh, okay...

Yeah, I would think if it was, he would intervene.

I gotta ask, have you seen the show Leave it To Beaver?

I just got an Eddie Haskell thought when you said your sister's boyfriend just does good in being polite to Mrs. Cleaver all the time... :lol:

no. you're not being mean-spirited. you're her older sister and you care about her well being, correct? i can't believe you're Mom said "all men cheat!" :mad: being a male, i would never cheat on my girlfriend.
and i'd ask her why she'd let an 18 year old boy sleep over with her 17 year old daughter. stuff like that doesn't happen every day.

My sister is 17 years old and she's inherited an idiot gene. Her boyfriend who's 18 has cheated on her at least six times, they've broken up at least six times, and she's taken him back at least six times. I treated this kid well the first time, even the second time...I STILL do if I'm forced to say hi or something. He's over our house everyday, sleeps over everyday...our house is tiny, there's no privacy but now I have to basically live with this punk. So I bitch about it to my mom, and all she has to say is that I'm mean hearted. She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are. You can't expect people to be perfect, blah blah. He makes your sister happy so that's fine.

So I'm sitting here crying now because she just made me feel like a horrible human being because I don't let **** like that fly. I don't give sixth, fifth, fourth, third, or even second chances sometimes. My sister could do better. So I don't want him in the house constantly, I'm mean hearted. It's not like I even act rude to him, though I should. I'm too nice to him. I just don't understand how my mom and sister could be so completely stupid. Or are they right? Am I just some mean hearted, horrible person?

Sounds to me like what you have is a good level head & lots of common sense. It also sounds like sis and mom need to take a ride on the clue train. The guys no good. At least you can let your hair down here, as it seems like we get it. As Ann Landers would say your mom & sister need to wake up and smell the coffee. Hang in there. You deserve many stars for being civil to him...shows you're a class act...at least you won't make the same mistakes!

Her boyfriend sounds like a badass

Not at all Ashlee. I think you're just trying to help. :)

My sister is 17 years old and she's inherited an idiot gene. Her boyfriend who's 18 has cheated on her at least six times, they've broken up at least six times, and she's taken him back at least six times. I treated this kid well the first time, even the second time...I STILL do if I'm forced to say hi or something. He's over our house everyday, sleeps over everyday...our house is tiny, there's no privacy but now I have to basically live with this punk. So I bitch about it to my mom, and all she has to say is that I'm mean hearted. She says that's what boys do, they cheat and that's just how they are. You can't expect people to be perfect, blah blah. He makes your sister happy so that's fine.

So I'm sitting here crying now because she just made me feel like a horrible human being because I don't let **** like that fly. I don't give sixth, fifth, fourth, third, or even second chances sometimes. My sister could do better. So I don't want him in the house constantly, I'm mean hearted. It's not like I even act rude to him, though I should. I'm too nice to him. I just don't understand how my mom and sister could be so completely stupid. Or are they right? Am I just some mean hearted, horrible person?


You are not mean hearted.. first you're mom is wrong about what she said about boyu's , "that's what boys do" NOT all boy's cheat, if they really care about the girl, and love her, they wouldn't cheat on her that many times are even once, who ever cheats on a girlfriend/boyfriend are losers and if youre sister like's to be treated that way that's her fault by going back with the guy, ( I agree with you 100%) guy's like that are scumb who cheat on a girlfriend, then they stay over night every day??? if you need someone to chat with, message me .. theres this saying "WHAT'S A CHEATER IS ALWAY'S A CHEATER"! there's better men in the see, and nicer ones, that are 100% True, and honest with you.........

Why can I picture your mom and sister on the Dr. Phil show and Phil giving your mom a bitch-slap upside the head and in his Texan drawl:

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!

My parents were VERY liberal with us as teens, but there would still be no way in hell they would allow a 17 yr old boyfriend to sleep over when I was that age. And honestly, there's no way I would have wanted him over with my parents right there.

Too bad you couldn't take over custody of your sister - she sounds like she could sure use some direction from a responsible person. Your mom is setting her up for a lifetime of heartache telling her it's normal for a guy to cheat. And yeah, with all due respect, sounds like your mom has some serious self esteem issues herself.

You are not mnean-hearted. Your mother and sister are in the wrong. I hope your sister doesn't wind up pregnant with this loser's baby.

Why can I picture your mom and sister on the Dr. Phil show and Phil giving your mom a bitch-slap upside the head and in his Texan drawl:

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!

My parents were VERY liberal with us as teens, but there would still be no way in hell they would allow a 17 yr old boyfriend to sleep over when I was that age. And honestly, there's no way I would have wanted him over with my parents right there.

Too bad you couldn't take over custody of your sister - she sounds like she could sure use some direction from a responsible person. Your mom is setting her up for a lifetime of heartache telling her it's normal for a guy to cheat. And yeah, with all due respect, sounds like your mom has some serious self esteem issues herself.
My mom does have self esteem issues. That's where I inherited it from, not to mention my dad didn't help. Yet, how she still accepts the way guys act after what they've put her through in the past I'll never know.

Thanks, though, to all of you. You're all right and it makes me feel less insane. Sometimes I do feel horrible for being a little tough about it so I need the reassurance. My mom's not a bad person and I'm pretty protective of her because of issues with my dad, but I'll still come right out and say that the way she thinks is flat out stupid sometimes.

I will also say this, they don't do anything that I know of. At least not in this house. This house is tiny, her rooms just a few feet away from mine, he sleeps on the floor and they always leave the door open. That's the one thing I'll give them credit for. Hell, that's why I think he cheats on my sister so much. He wants some and she's just not into that...that I know of.

I'd LOVE to take my family to Dr. Phil. Holy ****, he'd have a ton to say to my mom AND dad. Both need a reality smack. Sometimes I feel like I'm the damn parent.

Her boyfriend sounds like a badass
He's an idiot. The one person that really understands is my cousin, who he's also hit on and sent text messages to her saying he loves her and all this bull****. I guess my sister's okay with that. :)

He's an idiot. The one person that really understands is my cousin, who he's also hit on and sent text messages to her saying he loves her and all this bull****. I guess my sister's okay with that. :)
Damn. Your sister could do sooo much better.

He's an idiot. The one person that really understands is my cousin, who he's also hit on and sent text messages to her saying he loves her and all this bull****. I guess my sister's okay with that. :)This dude sounds like a player. Did you try to talk to your sis about what he's doing, does she listen to you? I think you're the only adult in this situation, you should be proud of yourself. :)

I don't think you're being mean. I'd probably have pushed the kid down the stairs if given the opportunity, but I'm a lot meaner than you could ever be.

But seriously, it surprises me that a woman your mom's age would lump all boys together and assume that cheating is something we all do. That attitude also makes it sound like it's acceptable because it's something that happens often, and that's not true either. It sounds like they're lacking common sense, and I don't think you are wrong at all in this situation.

I'm also wondering why he is allowed to sleep over every night? That's a disaster waiting to happen. Also, when people set such low expectations for themselves, like picking losers like your sister has done, that is the type of person they'll end up with for the rest of their life. So I would continue voicing your feelings on this to your family.

I also feel like by allowing this kid into your house, your mother isn't looking out for your sister's best interests and is setting a bad example, but that's just my opinion.

You are not in any sort of wrong here and I have to say I feel bad for your mom because she obviously doesn't have any respect for herself and your sister too for that matter.

He's an idiot. The one person that really understands is my cousin, who he's also hit on and sent text messages to her saying he loves her and all this bull****. I guess my sister's okay with that. :)

Sounds to me like you're putting all the blame on him, which I'm not saying he's in the right... but your sister isn't much better for putting up with it.

But I understand your looking out for your family...

*Goes back to gimmick posting*

The best way to do it is... he sleeps over all the time... smother him in his sleep, and find a quick way to dispose of the body.

Youre about as meanhearted as Jesus. Really.

That guy is an idiot. Tell him to pay rent or get out.

Sounds to me like you're putting all the blame on him, which I'm not saying he's in the right... but your sister isn't much better for putting up with it.

But I understand your looking out for your family...

*Goes back to gimmick posting*

The best way to do it is... he sleeps over all the time... smother him in his sleep, and find a quick way to dispose of the body.
I've talked to my sister a lot about it, she won't listen. She says I don't understand, mind your own business, blah blah blah. She's being an idiot, too.

Anyway, the kid's gone to see his dad for the holiday, so at least I get some break from this crap.

The best way to do it is... he sleeps over all the time... smother him in his sleep, and find a quick way to dispose of the body.

:lol:

I've talked to my sister a lot about it, she won't listen. She says I don't understand, mind your own business, blah blah blah. She's being an idiot, too.

Anyway, the kid's gone to see his dad for the holiday, so at least I get some break from this crap.

Well, you can't beat yourself up over it. You tried... and you can't help someone who doesn't wanna be helped. If you ask me though, I really don't think you're mean-spirited.