do you feel that if a child lives with a biological parent and the other parent is remarried, the step-parent has any right to get involved in the life of the child and the biological parent?

i don't think so.
for example, my stepmom always tells my dad he needs to push for more custody over my brother and i, and she always tells me "It's unfair that you spend much more time with your mom, your dad and I get the short end of the straw' and I say to her, I DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING. THE LAW SAYS I NEED TO SEE MY FATHER BUT I DON'T NEED TO SPEAK TO YOU AT ALL, YOU'RE NOTHING TO ME. and then i remind her that just because she is married to my dad doesn't mean she has any say in what i do and she can go raise her four children and leave me alone. i gave her a chance at first but she's shown that she feels entitled to decide for my whole family what should be done, and i don't feel it's her place and i don't owe her **** :)

opinion?

I agree, sounds she's overstepping her bounds and needs to back off.

i think if both biological parents are capable and still alive, step-parents need to mind their own business :) but i agree.

sounds like she is just looking out for your dad. just ignore her, you're better off.

sounds like she is just looking out for your dad. just ignore her, you're better off.

i do ignore her. :)

but i do have to see her this thanksgiving for a little while.
great.

Quit being such a whiney little b i t ch. All you are doing is making it harder on your dad cause you're being such a puss. Grow a pair of balls and be a man. In your case that's going to be hard though. Nice hair cut.

I don't even know you, you have no reason to judge me and I'm not going to waste time arguing, so if drama is what you want you'll have to go looking somewhere else :)

you're the one who has made 4 posts total on this message board, all of which being personal attacks. you're the one who needs to grow up, not me.

that's OU812/Bobby F. he isn't actually judging you, he just loves trolling. ignore him.

ignore your stepmom as well. it's wrong of her to be saying that stuff to you to begin with.

that's OU812/Bobby F. he isn't actually judging you, he just loves trolling. ignore him.

ignore your stepmom as well. it's wrong of her to be saying that stuff to you to begin with.

that's who that is?! makes sense. i looked at his posts and saw they're all nasty.

I don't see it as a solid yes or no situation. As far as making important issues regarding your health, education and discipline, I think that's up to your bio-parents. When you stay with your father and stepmom, however; you have to abide by their rules, in their home. I think your stepmom is wrong to badmouth your mother to you.

Still, as a stepmother of four for 25 years, I can appreciate what a difficult situation it is. I tried like hell, spun my wheels for years trying to buy their love. My mother used to get so angry because I showered my stepkids with gifts, parties, you name it, and it was a miracle if they gave me a birthday card. It's a thankless job, from my experience anyway. I tell every young girl I know, don't marry a man with kids. Run for your life.
:seeya:

I don't see it as a solid yes or no situation. As far as making important issues regarding your health, education and discipline, I think that's up to your bio-parents. When you stay with your father and stepmom, however; you have to abide by their rules, in their home. I think your stepmom is wrong to badmouth your mother to you.

Still, as a stepmother of four for 25 years, I can appreciate what a difficult situation it is. I tried like hell, spun my wheels for years trying to buy their love. My mother used to get so angry because I showered my stepkids with gifts, parties, you name it, and it was a miracle if they gave me a birthday card. It's a thankless job, from my experience anyway. I tell every young girl I know, don't marry a man with kids. Run for your life.
:seeya:

I can understand that as a stepmother, it is challenging. I just don't understand why a step-parent wouldn't do everything they could to not alienate their stepchildren (my stepmom has definitely put herself on my **** list). I hate when she says to my dad "Ohh if he were my kid I wouldn't let this happen", to that I said to her once "you have four children to be concerned about, one of which is in jail. not me."

I feel as long as both biological parents are alive and very involved in their chidren's lives stepparents should mind their own business. My brother is the stepfather of a 10-year-old girl who has a dad in her life and basically my brother's wife convinces my brother to act like the little girl's dad. My brother does way too much for that little girl and I don't think it is right because she has a dad that she sees often.

I think the situation is a 'fine line'. The step parent should not interfere, but like it or not, they are part of the kid's life now. People have to know their boundaries and act accordingly, and respectfully--either way.

I think the situation is a 'fine line'. The step parent should not interfere, but like it or not, they are part of the kid's life now. People have to know their boundaries and act accordingly, and respectfully--either way.

agreed.

but my stepmom doesn't know her boundaries. :o
one thing i think step-parents should NEVER do is talk about the biological parent to their stepchild.

agreed.

but my stepmom doesn't know her boundaries. :o
one thing i think step-parents should NEVER do is talk about the biological parent to their stepchild.

I agree; good point.

that's OU812/Bobby F. he isn't actually judging you, he just loves trolling. ignore him.

Wow, OU812 and Bobby F. were/are the same person? I had no idea. Hasn't Bobby F. been banned for ages anyway?

I agree; good point.


and also i don't think its right for them to assess their current spouse's previous marriages, since they're only hearing one side of the story (usually a biased one).

i agree with what everyone has said on here. i think as long as it doesn't involve education, health care, etc, your stepmom can be involved and it would be nice if she wanted to be. however, she shouldn't be talking about your mom like that, especially in front of you, and shouldn't be pushing your dad to do things the way she wants them done. it just doesn't sound like a good enviornment and it makes you not want to be around her. if your biological parents have an agreement already made, then that's what should be followed. she doesn't need to/shouldn't change that. she can have a relationship with you and try to get to know/grow closer to you, but it doesn't seem like that's where she's going either.

My mom had a boyfriend about 5 years ago that was an AWFUL person. He was so bossy and he thought he knew everything. I told him off plenty of times. But he is dead now, so I dont have to worry about it anymore. Of course her current boyfriend kind of likes to get nosey when me or my brothers like to borrow money from her. We tell him its none of his business!

But he is dead now, so I dont have to worry about it anymore.
:lol: