RUBY REBORN::lol: :lol: :lol:

Brent: Want me to fill it up?
Man: Sure. You know I've never driven across Saskatchewan before.
Brent: Well, you still haven't really. About halfway to go yet.
Man: Sure is flat.
Brent: How do you mean?
Man: You know, flat. Nothing to see.
Brent: What do you mean, like topographically? Hey Hank, this guy says Saskatchewan is flat.
Hank: How do you mean?
Brent: Topographically, I guess. He says there's nothin' to see.
Hank: There's lots to see. There's nothin' to block your view.
Brent: There's lots to see. Nothin' to block your view. Like the mountains back there. They're uh... Well, what the hell? I could've sworn there was a big mountain range back there. Juttin' up into the sky all purple and majestic. I must be thinkin' of a postcard I saw or somethin'. Hey, it is kinda flat, thanks for pointin' that out.
Man: You guys always this sarcastic?
Brent: Nothin' else to do.

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Hank: Freaky abstract art on the walls, and she puts weird cloths on the table.
Brent: You mean tablecloths...
Hank: It's too much. She's turned the coffee house into a gay bar.

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Lacey: I mean come on, a boycott? Look, I'm not clubbing baby seals and I'm not using Hondurian children to make sneakers.
Hank: You could be clubbing baby seals with Hondurian children and I don't care about that!

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Oscar: (to Emma)Your son is turning the gas station into a movie theatre!
Brent: Bear in mind that Dad has a tendency to overstate things.
Oscar: I have never overstated a single thing in the history of the planet!

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Brent: Well, you're not in Toronto anymore, Lacey, with your grande-mocha-dappo-loppa-frappochinos! This is Dog River!

:yeahthat And thats only in episode #1, folks!!! :lol:

TAX MAN (One of my fave episodes) :lol:


Brent: It's not just you. Dad once got mad at a butterfly. Called it a 'sonofabitch' and told it to get out of his garden.

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Oscar: Oh, I see, all buddy-buddy with the tax man. My taxes pay for your suit, buddy boy!

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Marvin Drey the Taxman: I can appreciate that you don't wanna help me. I get that a lot, sometimes I get outright hostility. Just because of my job.
Brent: Well, no offence but I mean I can't just turn over my father. There's a bond between father and son that's strong and sacred.
Oscar: Hey idiot! You left the lid on the dumpster up last night! Crows have scattered garbage all over the place out there. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna clean it, it'll be you out there on your hands and knees scrapin' up crow crap!
Brent: I'll tell you whatever you need to know.

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Oscar: My taxes pay your salary!
Brent: Geez, Dad, you gotta stop paying everyone's salary! You're only one man!

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Oscar: Why'd you come in person? You ever hear of a telephone? It's a handy invention; I'll show you how it works sometime.
Marvin Drey the Taxman: We did call.
Oscar: You did not!
[flashback, Oscar is on the phone]
Oscar: What are you calling me on the phone for? My taxes paid for this call! You got something to say, you come here and say it in person. Get in the car, you ever hear of a car? It's a handy invention; I'll show you how it works sometime!
[He slams the phone down.]
Emma: Who was that?
Oscar: I don't know, some jackass!

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Marvin Drey the Taxman: I just need to speak to your father to verify a few things.
Brent: I don't think he's here. I think he went to Hawaii.
Marvin Drey the Taxman: Hawaii?
Brent: Not Hawaii. Somewhere cheaper than that. Red Deer.

the Taxman ( or should that be *A* Taxman? ;) <inside CG joke) is my all-time fave ep! :D

Yeah, Wanda is fixated on correcting people's grammar isn't she? I love it. She reminds me of "me". :lol:

I have a hard time not doing it here on SO, where its against the rules! :lol:

I know, it is hard!!! Grrrrrrrr.....

MAIL FRAUD


Hank: Is Aruba near Cuba?
Lacey: They don't arrange countries phonetically.
Hank: It would be cool if they did, though. Then Canada would be next to...Granada.
Lacey: It's Grenada.
Hank: Yeah right! And we live in Ca-Nay-Da. So did he tell you where he was going next?
Lacey: Yeah! Yeah, he just landed in Madrid, which is right next to, uh...Fadrid.
Hank: Oh! Lucky skunk.
Lacey: Hank, he's not lucky. He's delusional.

hehehe Makes you want to go on Staycation, doesnt it? ;)

I need a staycation right now. :lol:

Got a big backyard? :lol:

Brent: "there's a farmer sniffing my head right now"

Yeah, what fruit^^^^^ was mentioned abt that? :lol:

Mangos! :lol:

Thank you. :lol:

Brent:
"Well, good luck with that!"
"You lost me!"

Wanda:
"Pow! Scorch!!!"

Lacey:
"I just don't fit into this town!"
"ohhhhhhhh!!! I did it again!"

Davis:
"ALL RIIIIIIGHTTTTTT!!!"
"Hey, rookie!"

Karen:
"Dayyyyvisssssss!!"

Hank:
"Can I borrow a tenski?"
"I need some Pop-Rocks!"

Emma:
"Oscar , quit it!!!"
"Riiiiiiiiighhhht."

Oscar:
"I PAY YOUR SALARY!"
"...IT'S A HANDY INVENTION, I'LL SHOW YOU HOW TO USE IT SOMETIME!"
"BAHHH!!"
and of course......"JACKASS!!!!!!"

:rofl:

If you think of more, go ahead and add them :)

One of my favs:

Paul: Hi Lacey, what can I get you?
Lacey: I feel like a glass of wine... what's your house red?
Paul: I'm not sure...
[Yells to the backroom]
Paul: Hey, what's it say on that bag of wine over there? No, that's ketchup, the one beside it!!
Lacey: You know what? Beer's good.

:lol: I forgot Lacey's BEST catchphrase....whenever she wins something competitive...... IN YOUR FACE!!!!! `

When Hank "convinced" Karen and Davis to eat healthier snacks than just donuts, she comes up with zucchini cupcakes....
Davis: "You sure can taste the Zuccini!"
Karen: "Yeah, they're kind of DRY!"
Davis: "Want to see who can throw them furthest?" :rofl:

Then they replace the zuccini with chocolate chips....eventually, covering them with smarties and chocolate icing!!! :
Karen: "After i eat one, I feel really energetic.....for ten minutes; then I crash!.........So I eat another one!" :rofl:

Great addition to this thread. :lol:

Thx , great thread ;) Speaking of threads, I added a new pic puzzle :woohoo: !

Season 5 ep , Wanda is working for extra cash at the town bar:

Emma: "Give me something cold and stiff!"
Wanda: "Have you tried the Morgue?" :lol:

My all-time favorite CG quote.........

(Oscar, having been banned from the beerstore has decided to make his own homebrew........)
Oscar: "Here it is, the maiden batch of "Oscarbrau"!"
Lacey: "I left Toronto to GET AWAY from the polution!"
Brent looking at beer in his glass: " Geez Dad, did you mix this in a Skidoo Boot, or a crow's nest???"
Brent after tasting: "Honest to GOD Dad, it tastes like you beat a skunk to death with a salmon!!!!!!" :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :roller:

Emma: "I don't know why we all didnt SEE it before, Carl is kind of a "dink"!"
Brent (The one person who didn't like Carl ): "Well, I have a very sensitive "dink meter"!"
Lacey (looking at Brent kind of funny): "I wish i hadnt heard that..."
Brent: "YOU wish????!!!" :lol: :rofl:

The towns 2 police officers talking about the local talent show, Senior Officer Davis has just asked his junior officer to play the "dummy" in a ventrilloquist act; and she has refused.......

Davis: "Why wont you be my dummy?"
Karen: "Because it isn't dignified, Police officers need to be respected by the community!"
Davis: "Pffffttttt!!! Who told you THAT?" :lol: