callmetootie
06-06-2001, 05:29 PM
"The Return Of Hacksaw"
Season 7
[Blair selling an item to an old lady]
Old Lady: Hello young girl, I'am looking for a clock.
Blair: Well, we have penguin clocks, dinosaur clocks, and my favorite: a bloomingdales clock.
Old Lady: You don't sell regular, standard, basic clocks. How Am I supposed to know if these things even tick!
Blair: I'm sure they tick.
Old Lady: You're ticking me off. You kids are all the same.
[Lady leaves the store]
Jo: So Blair, you scared another customer today?
Blair: I didn't, she wasn't very nice, she didn't like the bloomingdale's clock.
Jo: I know the perfect place to stick the clock.
[Phone rings]
[Man on the phone]
Jo: Hello, Over Our Heads, how may I help you?
Man: Jo, is that you my little pizza maker?
Jo: Who is this....Oh No! Hacksaw!!!!!!
Hacksaw: Yep, that's me babe. How is my little pumpkin honeybun doing?
Jo: I was better 30 seconds ago.
Hacksaw: Listen cupcake, I'm stopping by at your store, and me and you can do something. Ok?
Jo: Hacksaw, you're making my stomach hurt. Ok, but NO dates!
Hacksaw: Ok Babe.
Jo: And stop calling me Babe!
[2 hours later]
[A knock at the door]
Jo: Oh boy.
Hacksaw: Hey babe, give me some sugar and honey and...
Jo: You are a tree trunk!
Hacksaw: I hoped you noticed, I made them this morning just for you!
Jo: What do you mean Hacksaw, how did you make those muslces so fast?
Hacksaw: You know Jo, we are made for eachother.
Jo: You didn't answer me..how did you get them?
Hacksaw: Jo, I'm dying.
Jo: What?
Hacksaw: I had an overdose of steroids.
[Close up of Jo's face]
Jo: Hacksaw, I'm so sorry. But why Hacksaw? Why did you ruin your life?
Hacksaw: I did it for you Jo. I always had this big thing about you, and I want to spend my last days with you.
Jo: Hacksaw, I'm sorry.
[They look into eachothers eyes]
[They kiss]
Jo: Hacksaw, I love you.
[The next day Hacksaw stayed at a hotel overnight and never came bac to the store]
Jo: What happpened to Hacksaw?
Blair: I don't know, but I can't belive that he would do that.
[Jo turns on the Morning News]
The Reporter: It has been reported to be that a young man by the name of Johnathan "Hacksaw" Bertinelli was found dead in his hotel room last night. The cause was an overdose of steroids, and sleeping pills.
[Jo cries, and lays her head on Blair]
THE END.
------------------
Andrew Carden
[This message has been edited by callmetootie (edited 06-07-2001).]
Season 7
[Blair selling an item to an old lady]
Old Lady: Hello young girl, I'am looking for a clock.
Blair: Well, we have penguin clocks, dinosaur clocks, and my favorite: a bloomingdales clock.
Old Lady: You don't sell regular, standard, basic clocks. How Am I supposed to know if these things even tick!
Blair: I'm sure they tick.
Old Lady: You're ticking me off. You kids are all the same.
[Lady leaves the store]
Jo: So Blair, you scared another customer today?
Blair: I didn't, she wasn't very nice, she didn't like the bloomingdale's clock.
Jo: I know the perfect place to stick the clock.
[Phone rings]
[Man on the phone]
Jo: Hello, Over Our Heads, how may I help you?
Man: Jo, is that you my little pizza maker?
Jo: Who is this....Oh No! Hacksaw!!!!!!
Hacksaw: Yep, that's me babe. How is my little pumpkin honeybun doing?
Jo: I was better 30 seconds ago.
Hacksaw: Listen cupcake, I'm stopping by at your store, and me and you can do something. Ok?
Jo: Hacksaw, you're making my stomach hurt. Ok, but NO dates!
Hacksaw: Ok Babe.
Jo: And stop calling me Babe!
[2 hours later]
[A knock at the door]
Jo: Oh boy.
Hacksaw: Hey babe, give me some sugar and honey and...
Jo: You are a tree trunk!
Hacksaw: I hoped you noticed, I made them this morning just for you!
Jo: What do you mean Hacksaw, how did you make those muslces so fast?
Hacksaw: You know Jo, we are made for eachother.
Jo: You didn't answer me..how did you get them?
Hacksaw: Jo, I'm dying.
Jo: What?
Hacksaw: I had an overdose of steroids.
[Close up of Jo's face]
Jo: Hacksaw, I'm so sorry. But why Hacksaw? Why did you ruin your life?
Hacksaw: I did it for you Jo. I always had this big thing about you, and I want to spend my last days with you.
Jo: Hacksaw, I'm sorry.
[They look into eachothers eyes]
[They kiss]
Jo: Hacksaw, I love you.
[The next day Hacksaw stayed at a hotel overnight and never came bac to the store]
Jo: What happpened to Hacksaw?
Blair: I don't know, but I can't belive that he would do that.
[Jo turns on the Morning News]
The Reporter: It has been reported to be that a young man by the name of Johnathan "Hacksaw" Bertinelli was found dead in his hotel room last night. The cause was an overdose of steroids, and sleeping pills.
[Jo cries, and lays her head on Blair]
THE END.
------------------
Andrew Carden
[This message has been edited by callmetootie (edited 06-07-2001).]