Do you think your birth order makes a difference in how you interact with your family? How about with other people? :triplets

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.

I don't think so. It may play a part for some people, but not in general. My late brother was the "youngest" until I was adopted. He was 10 when I was adopted. So, for ten years he thought he was the youngest, but no more.

Then, I was the youngest, until my father remarried and he had a son with his wife when I was 10 years old. Nothing changed. I was no longer the youngest, but it didn't change anything abt me.

My youngest daughter was 13 when I had my son. So for 13 years she was the youngest and again, nothing changed simply because she is now the middle child.

I think people read too much into birth order. They may try and use it to their advantage or disadvantage - ala Jan Brady on the Brady Bunch...:lol:.

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.

:wave: I hear a lot of firstborns say that.

I don't think so. It may play a part for some people, but not in general. My late brother was the "youngest" until I was adopted. He was 10 when I was adopted. So, for ten years he thought he was the youngest, but no more.

Then, I was the youngest, until my father remarried and he had a son with his wife when I was 10 years old. Nothing changed. I was no longer the youngest, but it didn't change anything abt me.

My youngest daughter was 13 when I had my son. So for 13 years she was the youngest and again, nothing changed simply because she is now the middle child.

I think people read too much into birth order. They may try and use it to their advantage or disadvantage - ala Jan Brady on the Brady Bunch...:lol:.

:wave: In general, if a pattern is set, I think it happens fairly early in life. I am a middle child, but my sister is five years older so she was an only for a long time (and has never forgiven me for being born :lol: ). My brother and I are closer in age, so sometimes I act like an oldest child, and sometimes I act like a twin. People sometimes think I am an only. I also thought about Jan: "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha." Although I am a middle child, I didn't share Jan's experience. :)

I'm the oldest and I agree, my parents are much more strict with me than they are with my two younger sisters. It really sucks. There's also the age difference between us, my sisters are five and seven years younger than me so we don't always get along.

:wave: I hear a lot of firstborns say that.
often enough, the parents are just being realistic. children of different ages need to be given different expectations. a 13-year-old is capable of much more responsibility than a six-year-old, for example.

i don't know about how one's birth order affects interactions with people outside the family, but it's true that it sometimes does within the family/household.

I'm the oldest and I agree, my parents are much more strict with me than they are with my two younger sisters. It really sucks. There's also the age difference between us, my sisters are five and seven years younger than me so we don't always get along.

Sounds like the same age difference and interaction pattern as my siblings and me. I think a lot depends on how you look at it. My brother and I always thought my sister got to do more things than we did (of course she did; she was older :wallbang :lol: )

often enough, the parents are just being realistic. children of different ages need to be given different expectations. a 13-year-old is capable of much more responsibility than a six-year-old, for example.

i don't know about how one's birth order affects interactions with people outside the family, but it's true that it sometimes does within the family/household.

I also think a lot of parents are more cautious with their firstborn. They relax a little after they see that they didn't break the child. :lol:

I'm the first born and I definitely didn't get away with as much as my brothers did! I was expected to be the smart, responsible one in a way.

I'm the youngest, there is 12 years between my brother and I and 16 years between my sister and I. I never noticed a difference on how I reacted within the family or outside of it.

Middle of three!

I'm the first born and I definitely didn't get away with as much as my brothers did! I was expected to be the smart, responsible one in a way.

Sounds like you had to meet your parents' expectations. Many firstborns say this. It seems to me that it's more about the parents (maybe their anxieties) than about the child. Doesn't sound like it was a bad thing, though. :)

I'm the oldest and my parents are more strict with me than my brother.
Boy do I know THAT one!!!!!!!

I'm the youngest, there is 12 years between my brother and I and 16 years between my sister and I. I never noticed a difference on how I reacted within the family or outside of it.

Wow, that's a huge difference. In many ways, you are probably like an only (you didn't have to share toys with siblings; you didn't have siblings your age to play/argue with, etc.). People very often ask me my birth order - based on how they are evaluating my behaviors. Hardly anyone ever pegs me as a middle child. :)

I'm the youngest, there is 12 years between my brother and I and 16 years between my sister and I. I never noticed a difference on how I reacted within the family or outside of it.
and I'm the oldest. Their is a 12 year difference between me and my middle sister and a 16 year difference between me and my youngest one. :lol:

No, not really. My brother lived at home right up until he got married and even then he and his wife were at our house, more than they're own. When I was a kid, I used to think the age differences were pretty big, but not so much anymore. :)

I did like not having to share any toys though :lol:

Sometimes, I wonder what it would be like to be the oldest or the middle child.

Boy do I know THAT one!!!!!!!

Doesn't seem like it hurt you - or stifled your artistic creativity. :)

and I'm the oldest. Their is a 12 year difference between me and my middle sister and a 16 year difference between me and my youngest one. :lol:

Did you have responsibility for them, or did you feel like you had a lot of freedom? :)

Doesn't seem like it hurt you - or stifled your artistic creativity. :)
Well, thats not necessarily true but, thats family for you

No, not really. My brother lived at home right up until he got married and even then he and his wife were at our house, more than they're own. When I was a kid, I used to think the age differences were pretty big, but not so much anymore. :)

I did like not having to share any toys though :lol:

Sometimes, I wonder what it would be like to be the oldest or the middle child.

I think the beauty of my experience is that I know what it feels like to be all of them. I also know what it feels like to be the youngest. When we visited my relatives, my brother and I were about ten years younger than everyone else, and they treated us like the babies. Soemtimes they still do, even though none of us are anywhere near being "babies" anymore. For a lot pf people, the age differences do go away as you get older: not in my family. :lol:

Well, thats not necessarily true but, thats family for you

Oh, okay. I thought you mentioned elsewhere that you were artistic. :confused:

Did you have responsibility for them, or did you feel like you had a lot of freedom? :)
It was probably half and half. I babysat a lot but I was okay with that and other than that they didn't bother me. I had waited so long to have a sibling I liked it. All my cousins had brothers and sisters and I felt strange because I was an only child. I wish they were closer in age to me though. That's my one regret.

It was probably half and half. I babysat a lot but I was okay with that and other than that they didn't bother me. I had waited so long to have a sibling I liked it. All my cousins had brothers and sisters and I felt strange because I was an only child. I wish they were closer in age to me though. That's my one regret.

That's beautiful. :crying:

I'm an only, so who knows?

My mom was in the middle of 4...2.5 years between the first two, 8 years separating 2 (my mom) and 3, and 4 years between 3 and 4. The first two were raised with discipline and structure (a little too much occasionally) and my mom was sort of the "forgotten" child. The last two I believe were raised by wolves or something. You seriously would shake your head to find out the first two were related to the last two. It's like when number 3 came along, my grandparents stopped caring to parent. My mom was more a "mom" than a sister to the youngest. I don't know about #3, and frankly, to me he doesn't exist anyway. He's a worthless excuse for a human.

My dad was the oldest of 3, all pretty much 2 years apart, give or take a few months. The middle one was the one spoiled by my grandmother because for some reason, my grandfather never liked him, and paid more attention to my dad and my youngest uncle. But then that uncle was sick a lot, so he was babied too. But I don't think any of them were ignored completely and they all got along. Plus my great grandparents were always around.

I'm the youngest of 2 we are both pretty much equal but at times I can get more attention based on the fact that I'm more vocal than my brother. But since he's more responsible than me he's trusted more.

Middle of three.

I'm the oldest of 2. :)

I think being the middle child makes a difference in how I turned out. For the first seven years of my life, it was nice being the "baby" of the family, but I was shaken to the core when my brother was born in 1970. I was glad to have a younger brother, but then I found that I was no longer the center of attention--though I felt like I was not successful at being the center of attention in the first place, even before my younger brother was born. But now my brother came first, and my older brother, the older "overachiever" sibling, seemed to take over as the caretaker of my baby brother, as I was still too young...and apparently forgotten. It was really strange, I remember going into my mother's room one morning, and pleaded and begged for a raccoon, while my brother tried to get me out of the room to let her sleep.
For years, I wondered, why in the world did I beg for my mother for something
so out of the ordinary as a raccoon, for a pet?? I realized later that it was because I felt deprived as a child, now that I had a new brother that took people's time away from me. I loved animals, and a raccoon was the coolest pet in the world that I could think of. I wanted to know that I still mattered, and that a wild animal that was tamed to pet status could be the proof of my mother's love. :nod: :yeahthat:

So I think that with being the middle child, I found myself in extreme competition with my two brothers, one who was a baby and needed everyone
to take care of him, and one who was older and was more or less "relied on" to take care of my younger brother. I didn't fit anymore, so I pretty much spent the rest of my youth having to struggle for attention. But I did get some sort of revenge when I was in eighth grade in 1976/77: I loved to paint, and a lot of my themes dealt with mythology, religion, magic, and practically anything that could be found on a Black Sabbath album. My mother was so proud of me that she put my paintings up all over the house. My older brother ragged on my "stupid" art things, because they were too fantasy-oriented and had to do with my favorite band at at the time. I felt really embarrassed--until years later, I found out why: he was NOT an artist, and said as much. He thought painting and drawing was a waste of time, and that in every other way, he was "better" than me. But when I told him I was better than him in the creativity department with my paintings and drawings, etc., he acted like, well, "that wasn't important..." which my mother and my art teacher then knew that wasn't true. I realized later: HE WAS JEALOUS OF THE ATTENTION I WAS GETTING!!!" :D So all these years, I've still had a problem with his rigid attitude about my creativity and such. I think he's been frozen, he sounds very stuffy and too "proper". He just doesn't have that creative outlet and release that I do.

Middle of three!

:wave: We have something in common. :)

Oldest of three. I feel like my sister, who is 2 1/2 years younger not to mention a wife and mother, is much older than me in spirit. She has always been tough but tender, with a sharp mind. She is in charge of her family's finances (as my brother-in-law is rotten at math) and has always been leverl-headed and smart. I admire her a great deal. Still, my dad has always referred to his three kids as the Three Stooges. :lol: :stooges:

Oldest of three. I feel like my sister, who is 2 1/2 years younger not to mention a wife and mother, is much older than me in spirit. She has always been tough but tender, with a sharp mind. She is in charge of her family's finances (as my brother-in-law is rotten at math) and has always been leverl-headed and smart. I admire her a great deal. Still, my dad has always referred to his three kids as the Three Stooges. :lol: :stooges:


You're the big sis, Monika? I didn't know that.

You're the big sis, Monika? I didn't know that.
You didn't? Well, you always learn something new every day. :D

You didn't? Well, you always learn something new every day. :D

I guess so. :D

Oldest of 4 boys and there's 21 years difference between myself and my half brother but then again there's only a 1 year difference between his mother and I. :rolleyes:

Oldest of 4 boys and there's 21 years difference between myself and my half brother but then again there's only a 1 year difference between his mother and I. :rolleyes:

:faint: :lol: ;)

I'm an only, so who knows?

My mom was in the middle of 4...2.5 years between the first two, 8 years separating 2 (my mom) and 3, and 4 years between 3 and 4. The first two were raised with discipline and structure (a little too much occasionally) and my mom was sort of the "forgotten" child. The last two I believe were raised by wolves or something. You seriously would shake your head to find out the first two were related to the last two. It's like when number 3 came along, my grandparents stopped caring to parent. My mom was more a "mom" than a sister to the youngest. I don't know about #3, and frankly, to me he doesn't exist anyway. He's a worthless excuse for a human.

My dad was the oldest of 3, all pretty much 2 years apart, give or take a few months. The middle one was the one spoiled by my grandmother because for some reason, my grandfather never liked him, and paid more attention to my dad and my youngest uncle. But then that uncle was sick a lot, so he was babied too. But I don't think any of them were ignored completely and they all got along. Plus my great grandparents were always around.

:rofl: Interesting that you know all of this about your family. My mom is the youngest of four, and boy is she spoiled - even today! She and the brother right next to her are very different from the two older siblings - both of whom are more responsible. I do think parents can get tired after a while. :faint:

I bet that seems strange to only be a year older or younger than your half brother's mom and to be 21 years older than he is.

So true.

So true.
Charles, you must feel like you and your family are from THE TWILIGHT ZONE!! :rofl: (Sorry, I couldn't resist!)

I think being the middle child makes a difference in how I turned out. For the first seven years of my life, it was nice being the "baby" of the family, but I was shaken to the core when my brother was born in 1970. I was glad to have a younger brother, but then I found that I was no longer the center of attention--though I felt like I was not successful at being the center of attention in the first place, even before my younger brother was born. But now my brother came first, and my older brother, the older "overachiever" sibling, seemed to take over as the caretaker of my baby brother, as I was still too young...and apparently forgotten. It was really strange, I remember going into my mother's room one morning, and pleaded and begged for a raccoon, while my brother tried to get me out of the room to let her sleep.
For years, I wondered, why in the world did I beg for my mother for something
so out of the ordinary as a raccoon, for a pet?? I realized later that it was because I felt deprived as a child, now that I had a new brother that took people's time away from me. I loved animals, and a raccoon was the coolest pet in the world that I could think of. I wanted to know that I still mattered, and that a wild animal that was tamed to pet status could be the proof of my mother's love. :nod: :yeahthat:

Wow, very insightful! A raccoon? Who woulda thought? :) Your reaction to your new baby brother sounds a lot like my sister's reaction to me. My parents tell me she was fine until she realized they were keeping me. :lol: Then she started telling them to take me back because "we don't want her." :crying: Things never changed much. I guess it didn't help that I turned out to be the "high achiever" either. I have accepted the fact that she is never going to forgive me for being born. :rolleyes:

So I think that with being the middle child, I found myself in extreme competition with my two brothers, one who was a baby and needed everyone to take care of him, and one who was older and was more or less "relied on" to take care of my younger brother. I didn't fit anymore, so I pretty much spent the rest of my youth having to struggle for attention. But I did get some sort of revenge when I was in eighth grade in 1976/77: I loved to paint, and a lot of my themes dealt with mythology, religion, magic, and practically anything that could be found on a Black Sabbath album. My mother was so proud of me that she put my paintings up all over the house. My older brother ragged on my "stupid" art things, because they were too fantasy-oriented and had to do with my favorite band at at the time. I felt really embarrassed--until years later, I found out why: he was NOT an artist, and said as much. He thought painting and drawing was a waste of time, and that in every other way, he was "better" than me. But when I told him I was better than him in the creativity department with my paintings and drawings, etc., he acted like, well, "that wasn't important..." which my mother and my art teacher then knew that wasn't true. I realized later: HE WAS JEALOUS OF THE ATTENTION I WAS GETTING!!!" :D So all these years, I've still had a problem with his rigid attitude about my creativity and such. I think he's been frozen, he sounds very stuffy and too "proper". He just doesn't have that creative outlet and release that I do.

It took me a long time to realize my sister's jealousy. Once I understood that, I knew there was nothing I could do to change the situation, so I just focused (more) on being myself. For me, there were advantages to being a "forgotten" middle: my sister was the oldest and the first girl; my brother was the youngest and the only boy. I had no special birth order role (although I did have other special roles), so I was free to pretty much be who I wanted to be. And I am far more creative than either of my sibs. :)

Charles, you must feel like you and your family are from THE TWILIGHT ZONE!! :rofl: (Sorry, I couldn't resist!)

If you only knew. :lol: I do feel like I was born in the Twilight Zone at times. TZ debuted on Friday Oct 2nd, 1959 and I debuted on Friday Oct 2nd, 1964. :)

I'm the oldest of 2. :)

Lots of "oldests" in the poll. How much age difference? :)

I bet that seems strange to only be a year older or younger than your half brother's mom and to be 21 years older than he is.
I know of a 12 year old that got the pleasure of seeing his new-born uncle in the crib! :lol:

I'm the youngest of 2 we are both pretty much equal but at times I can get more attention based on the fact that I'm more vocal than my brother. But since he's more responsible than me he's trusted more.

:lol: It seems like both of you have found your "special place" in the family. I sometimes think responsibility is overrated - but that's just the free-spirited middle child in me speaking out. :lol:

I'm in the middle. I have an older brother and a much younger sister. I think it's difficult being in the middle. Your not the oldest (in many cases has a special place in the parent or parents' heart(s)) and you're not the youngest (normally seen as the cute one). I was the youngest for 13 years. On my 14th birthday my little sister was born. Technically she's my half sister, but I just call her my sister. My mother was much stricter on my brother and I than she has been on my sister. There are different factors that account for that.

Many middle children feel this way. I guess that's why Jan Brady was such a hit. :lol: Lots of people could relate. :)

I know of a 12 year old that got the pleasure of seeing his new-born uncle in the crib! :lol:

:lol: :lol:

Oldest of 4 boys and there's 21 years difference between myself and my half brother but then again there's only a 1 year difference between his mother and I. :rolleyes:

:wave: I know a couple of families like yours. It seemed weird to me at first, but then I got used to it. I have a girlfriend whose mother called her at school during her last semester and told her she was going to be a big sister. :faint: My friend was quite angry with her parents for a while. :lol:

I'm the first born and I definitely didn't get away with as much as my brothers did! I was expected to be the smart, responsible one in a way.

Hey, I'm an oldest child too but I've got sisters instead of brothers

i am the eldest of four. was born in 81, i have two younger brothers, one was born a year after me, the other born 5 years after me and i also have a sister who was born the year after my first brother during 83', if that makes sense! :)

Another oldest here, my brother is 2 years younger and my sister is 7 years younger than me. My parents were very strict with me, while my brother & sister got to do everything under the sun. lol! And guess who was in charge of looking out for everyone while my parents were at work? Yep little ole me, and if something went wrong guess who got the blame? So birth order does make a difference, at least it did in my family.

I'm the oldest. It does make a difference because the oldest always gets it harder than the rest, that's just how it is. My brother is allowed to do stuff that I was never allowed to do at that age. When we were younger, I was the one that always got the blame.

I'm an Only Child

I am the youngest of 5 girls. My parents were very young when the oldest sister came along (my mother was 15, my dad 18) so they were pretty strict at first I'm told. There is 11 years difference between my oldest sister and I. They definitely mellowed out as the years went on so they let me do a lot more than the older sisters were ever allowed to.

I am 2nd oldest out of 7. I am the oldest girl out of 4 so I guess I was kind of bossy. :p


Here is a break down of the years

1948- Mark
1950- Me
1952- Sharon
1954- Leah(My closest pal)
1957- Teresa
1962- Billy
1965- John

I'm the older one. I have a younger sister. My parents definitely were a lot stricter with me than they are with her. She acts like a selfish spoiled brat and gets away with it while I was always expected to be the mature responsible one.

Okay, this one was tricky. My mom had two sons before I was born that I never met. My dad had a daughter that I have met and we exchange cards. Then there's my brother, me and my sister. So, I guess I am technically the middle or something or other.

I am the oldest daughter between my mom and dad. The middle child between them and the middle child between all the others. Talk about confusing. LOL!

I'm the oldest of three. We all basically get whatever we want and it's all equal, but my parents are veryy strict on my grades, but don't really care about my brothers. It really doesn't bother me though, because I'm a straight A student anyway.

Im 4 of 5. We all got treated pretty much the same.

oldest of three & the only girl.
(19, 15 & 11).

I am six years and eight months older than my sister.

I'm the youngest and I do get away with a some things. I just don't know if that's because i'm the youngest or because i'm my moms only girl. When it comes to discipline, we all were and still are treated the same. My dad's a sucker, so there was an obvious difference in the way we were treated based on gender and age.

I'm the oldest.

I'm the youngest.