In an e-mail:

Dear IRS: I would like to cancel my subscription. Please remove my name from your mailing list.

I only have a kitchen because it came with the house.

I'm not 40 something, I'm $34,45 plus shipping & handling.

I don't have hot flashes, I have short private vacations in the tropics.

If it's not one thing, it's your mother.

I have PMS and ESP. That makes me a bitch that knows everything.

I gave up jogging because my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.

Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.

They lied. Hard work has killed lots of people.

:lol: