What are the pros and cons?

One thing that bothers me is the fact, that in all likelihood, you'll never meet the person.

Another thing is that they can be time consuming. My neck hurts if I sit at the computer too long, so writing e:mails can literally be a pain in the neck sometimes.

Often times, people who you think are terrific turn out to be backstabbers. I won't get into it, but I've had some lousy experiences there. Same can be said for real life too.

Despite all this, I have some wonderful online friendships. People who have helped me through some tough times.

I love my online friendships. Some of my best friends are people I've never met.

I've actually met a bunch of my online friends... I've met three of them at concerts ((one of which being Amy - AllIWantIsYourClutch)), and I met another when she flew here and stayed with me for a week. I came really close to meeting two other people, but that didn't work out.

I think the cons are not seeing them everyday. Not actually getting to hang out with them and go to the movies and stuff. And you can talk on the phone, but that's not the same as being able to call someone and go, "Wanna come over?" Plus I kinda hate the phone. Oops. And people can lie about who they are... I'm not talking the whole "40 year old man pretending to be a 16 year old girl" thing, I'm talking about like... people can act all tough and badass, when in real life, they're not. Yeah.

But I love my online friends with all my heart.

I have one true online friend, and I cherish it greatly. It sucks sometimes, when you feel like talking and they are not around their computer, but all in all, she has been a better friend to me than friends I know in real life.

I love online friends. With me, it feels like I have people to talk to who aren't going to judge me or put me down or whatever, unlike people I know in real life. I've met a bunch of online friends at concerts too...like Kaitlyn said. I met her and I also met Jeff (vienna waits) at some American Idol mall thing. And people from other places....(3 words...Clay. Aiken. Trolley.) It's a good time.

Online friends are the shiznit.


I have some of the best friends here

I think the worse thing about having online friends, is as was stated already, the fact that you'll probably never get the chance to meet most of them in real life, which can be extremely painful. Especially when you start feeling an attachment, and don't have many flesh and blood friends to fill that void. Sometimes I wish I could just reach into my computer, and give certain friends the biggest hug imagineable, either when they're feeling down, or when I am, and to not be able to do that, can be very hard. So that aspect of online friendships really sucks!!!

Overall though, I'm very happy about the online friends Iv'e made. I admit, I haven't always been the best friend I could be to certain people, for various reasons, and I wish I could apologize to everyone of them individually, but I really do try to maintain friendships, and there actually is an explanation for my laziness, but it's just so hard to explain sometimes. But anyway, I have only a handful of really really good online friends, and I can honestly say that I love them as much as I love myself, and wouldn't trade any one of them for the world!!! As hard, and painful as it can be to have online friends at times, that doesn't even compare to the positives that can come out of it.

Ive had online friends and weve been friends for at least 2 years or so

Actually my current boyfriend and I met from online. :lol: I'm all for online friendships!

The best thing about online friends for me is that I meet a lot of people that share common interests and those kind of people are hard to find at work or wherever. If I tell someone that I see every day in person that I watch classic TV shows or old black and white movies they look at me like I'm some kind of weirdo but I can find a ton of people online who like them. I'm really not all that interested in meeting any of these people because like Janice said, a lot of them may turn out to be backstabbers. It's just nice to get away for a few minutes each day and discuss an old movie/book or other common interest with someone that I would probably never come across in person.

I love having online friends. Actually, I think 99% of 'em are from SO! :D To be honest, I think I could tell things to my online friends that I could never tell my friends around here. It's probably cuz I don't have to tell them things face-to-face. Plus, they're not too quick to judge me.

But like most of you guys mentioned, it sucks that we'll never actually get to meet the other person. Unless one of you guys has enough time and money to catch a plane or road trip to meet the other. Most of my online friends don't even live close to California and that makes me sad.

All in all though, knowing that there's people on the other side of the country that are thinking of me makes me feel great. :)

I've got one really good online friend that I talk too. Anytime there has been something that has gone on in my life, good or bad, it's been great to be able to tell that person. I do feel guilty that we don't get to talk as much as I'd like but unfortunately real life comes before computer life and there always seems to be something going on in real life.

I like my online friends alot more than my real life friends. I've met pretty much all my online friends on SO. Its easier to talk to people online. I find that there is less bitchiness between people online. If you don't like someone online, you can block them or put them on ignore, sadly you can't do that in real life :lol:

I don't know exactly how I feel about online friendships. I have thought a lot about it.

If you do not know, I am quite active in a couple of Ace of Base online community forums. I have loved the group for 11.5 years, so I have known some others fans for years since I discovered the internet and other fans ten years ago, come this April 2006. That's a long time!

Since 2003, I have met a countless amount of people in three different Acer meetings ("Acers" are what we Ace of Base fans refer ourselves as). I have not only met Americans, but I also met people from different countries and different cultures and backgrounds (from Canada to Europe to Australia).

I don't really want to scare anyone, but I have discovered there have been a couple of people whom I have had a lot in common with in writing (emails, IMs, PMs, forums, etc), and when I met them in person, we just did not click. By "clicking" I mean that it seemed our contact disipated after meeting in person. We had more in common in written form more so than in person or in "hanging out" form. I have come to the conclusion that our initial "online contact" was much easier because both persons were just there at a given moment. In person, it was harder for me to carry on a conversation or took things personally based on their nonverbals. I guess it was just our personalities or something. I don't know. Therefore, I took it personally in the beginning when they wouldn't reciprocate. It's not a "hate" situation or anything, but it was more like quietly going our own ways with no hard feelings. There were never arguments, but it just happened this way. Now I just decided those friendships just "weren't meant to be."

On the other hand, it can also be the opposite. I can think of one Acer friend whom I have known for years on an on-and-off communication (ocassional emails...that sort of thing), and then when we met in person, we just clicked and are keeping in closer touch online than ever before. She and I keep in touch very often, and we have even shared some feelings and emotions. Again, that friendship was just "meant to be."

In my own personal conclusion, I don't feel I can call or label anyone I keep in touch online with as a "best" or "close" friend. I used to. There are still several people whom I have "considered" calling a best or close friend whom I haven't met yet. I am scared of being hurt or of knowing the possibility of a friendship not really there, in one way. So I just feel I have to separate both worlds. If I befriend people online and we get along, I just consider that a "casual online friendship." I feel I have to keep my distance.

Then again, "no two people and no two friendships are alike," right? This was said was by a friend, and I agree. I mean, friendships are all unique. So what works for one friendship won't necessarily be 100% the same for another, right?

So... these are the kinds of things I have discovered....

Pros:
-You get to freely talk with people who share your interest(s).
-You are not judged by HOW you look like but only WHAT you say.
-You don't risk rejection if you decide to meet in person.
-You can read (or lurk) all you want and not have to actually participate or opinionate unless you choose to do so.
-It's a really good stress reliever to find someone online who can "listen" with open "words" (instead of eyes, to speak).

Cons:
-If you are close with someone online and find you are not really close in person, this would just hurt too much.
-People can easily just "ignore" you without any rhyme, reason, or explanation. It's also happened to me a couple of times years ago.
-It's easier to lie.
-It's much easier to misinterpret what someone is saying. I mean, there are NO nonverbals (tonality, body language, etc), so you just read text according to what is said. All you are going by is your own perception of how it's written.

if it wasnt for online friends, I'd prolly have no friends at all...

Often times, people who you think are terrific turn out to be backstabbers. I won't get into it, but I've had some lousy experiences there. Same can be said for real life too.

Oh so true, irl as well as online.

Online friendships never last long with me. I'm a very lousy e-mail writer/chatter op msn.

I have better online friends than some of my real friends. And the ones Ive met have turned out to be really close friends. :D

Online friends are cool :D You can make good friends online

The bad things are you cant hang out with them and people could be lying about themselves...their age or their personality.

I love that this subject came up:D I don't have many real friends. The one's I do I hardly ever see. I don't know where I'd be without my internet friends! One in particular I am definitely grateful for. We have talked on the phone and she is just awesome! We've been friends for yeeears, the longest I have ever had any friends. I just wanted to say to people, don't stop being an internet person's friend cause you think you will never meet them, they have a lot to offer:D :wave:

I've made some great online friends, both here and elsewhere (but mostly here!). There's the distance issue, and the fact you'll never meet, but IMO, the pros outweigh the cons. Sometimes it's easier to be yourself with someone who's not sitting right in front of you. There's less pressure. Plus it's just easier to meet people, since you're not limited by your location.

I had many many close online pals on this website awhile ago. But somehow I keep wandering away from my beloved SO. I've been registered on this website for wow, almost 4 years. Many of my closest friends were from online, but I doubt many of them even remember me now.

if it wasnt for online friends, I'd prolly have no friends at all...
Yeah, pretty much.

I want to take bits and pieces of everyone's answers and just say, I agree.

I love my online friendships. Some of my best friends are people I've never met.

I think the cons are not seeing them everyday. Not actually getting to hang out with them and go to the movies and stuff.

And I also am not a huge phone fan. :lol: Thank God for IM.

It sucks sometimes, when you feel like talking and they are not around their computer, but all in all, she has been a better friend to me than friends I know in real life.

Here, here. I've been more or less dumped by so many irl (HS friends) people, and with no explaination. You can only take that so many times.

I think the worse thing about having online friends, is as was stated already, the fact that you'll probably never get the chance to meet most of them in real life, which can be extremely painful. Especially when you start feeling an attachment, and don't have many flesh and blood friends to fill that void. Sometimes I wish I could just reach into my computer, and give certain friends the biggest hug imagineable, either when they're feeling down, or when I am, and to not be able to do that, can be very hard.

:nod: And dang, airfare is expensive.

The best thing about online friends for me is that I meet a lot of people that share common interests and those kind of people are hard to find at work or wherever.

Oh, totally.

I don't wanna be all gushy, but basically, my online friends are the best friends I've ever had. They actually understand me or make an effort to, instead of just writing me off as crazy or something, and they've helped me through a lot of depressing times. I've been very fortunate to have meet one in person, and it turned out very, very well. :) Happiest 2 months I've actually had in quite a long time.

*Squeaky Mr. Hankey voice* Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii'll be y'friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiend, dawsongirl!!

And you, Polniaczek033! And Kristen! And JinnyGirl88! CarrieCrazed! *WeirdsymbolIdunnohowtodo*I Love Clay Aiken*WeirdsymbolIdunnohowtodo*!! Ahhh, hell, come on down, the whole damn bunch of ya at SO!!

...you get a car! YOU get a car!!...-YOU- get a car! EVERYBODY GETS A CAR!

yay a friend

and a car!

*Squeaky Mr. Hankey voice* Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii'll be y'friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiend, dawsongirl!!

And you, Polniaczek033! And Kristen! And JinnyGirl88! CarrieCrazed! *WeirdsymbolIdunnohowtodo*I Love Clay Aiken*WeirdsymbolIdunnohowtodo*!! Ahhh, hell, come on down, the whole damn bunch of ya at SO!!

...you get a car! YOU get a car!!...-YOU- get a car! EVERYBODY GETS A CAR!
Oh man...this is gonna cost so much in taxes....

:lol:

Yep, I still have those few people that I talk to online, but I'm kind of distancing myself from the internet these days. It's still great to catch up and see what's going on in everyone's lives, but I really needed to sort out some things, and hanging out constantly online was just making me ignore those problems and make me more isolated than I should have been. But after I confronted those problems, it was a lot easier to get off, go out, and make friends that I can actually see on a day to day basis. But don't get me wrong, the people I talk to online (you know who you are ;)) are still good friends of mine, even if I haven't really been on as much.

Yep, I still have those few people that I talk to online, but I'm kind of distancing myself from the internet these days. It's still great to catch up and see what's going on in everyone's lives, but I really needed to sort out some things, and hanging out constantly online was just making me ignore those problems and make me more isolated than I should have been. But after I confronted those problems, it was a lot easier to get off, go out, and make friends that I can actually see on a day to day basis. But don't get me wrong, the people I talk to online (you know who you are ;)) are still good friends of mine, even if I haven't really been on as much.

How would you like a car? :confused:

How would you like a car? :confused:

No thanks, just got one!

No thanks, just got one!

You DARE turn down my offer of the four door luxury vehicle of your DREAMS just like that?!?! :eek:

NO SOUP FOR YOU!!

I have lots of online friends I talk to about weather, politics, TV, and just general chit-chat(I usually spend several hours at night in a chat room with some friends from a weather board).

I met someone on-line a little over a year ago, and I'm so, so glad I did!!!! Only thing is, I hardly ever hear from her anymore exept for the occasional e-mail from her:( (we used to "talk" on I.M. almost every night)

if only she didn't live 800 miles away!!!:( :( :( :( :( :( :(

What would I do without me and Crystal's late night talks on AIM? and me and amy texting each other when we're bored.

Yep, I still have those few people that I talk to online, but I'm kind of distancing myself from the internet these days. It's still great to catch up and see what's going on in everyone's lives, but I really needed to sort out some things, and hanging out constantly online was just making me ignore those problems and make me more isolated than I should have been. But after I confronted those problems, it was a lot easier to get off, go out, and make friends that I can actually see on a day to day basis. But don't get me wrong, the people I talk to online (you know who you are ;)) are still good friends of mine, even if I haven't really been on as much.
holy crap you're alive.

no friends :(

I think there are a lot of pros to online friendships. First and foremost is that I have a lot more online friends than I do off the computer. When I was in high school, I had a lot of friends. But when they graduated (a number of them were a grade above me) I've lost touch with a lot of them. With my busy college schedules, I haven't had time to make new friends or get in touch with old ones.

I'll never meet the persons I've talked to online but I think it is good to remain anonymous. I have talked with someone on the phone a few times, though.

I really treasure the online friends that I have, considering that I dont have many friends offline. I haven't talked to some of them in quite a while, but I know that they're always there for me. I just wish I can meet them someday. :)

I've met some awesome people online, but I also had a bad experience meeting someone from online. We talked for about a year before she met me and stayed with me for a week. We were GREAT online/phone buddies, but upon meeting her, I found out she wasn't the type of person I thought she was (which crushed me a LOT).

That's the major downfall of online friendships-- it's truly hard to judge what they're really like because you don't KNOW them personally. You can't guage their reactions to things nor know what makes them tick. For the most part, though, I've met some cool people online and it's great to chat with them about things we have in common, stuff I can't talk about with my friends at home.

I've met many great friends here at SO. :) They are among some of the nicest people that I have ever known. I think the downside to online friendships is when a friend vanishes and you have no way of reaching them. Then all you can do is worry about them. :(

I just moved to a new town and I'm homeschooled so I dont know anyone in this town yet, so most of my friends are people I've met online. I've talked to a lot of freaks though. One guy, who I thought was a great guy, asked if we could be like internet bf/gf, but then he started talking about getting married and then me moving in with him, his brother and sister, and his mom. Um, sorry but I sorta draw the line at me and my husband living with his mother. ;) He still talks to me saying stuff like, "I can't wait til we meet and get married" but I try my best to not talk back, lol.

But then there are people I've met who are my second family. Kristel (above, retrogirl82) is so warm and friendly and she was there for me when no one else was. I have another friend who, in my eyes, is my little sister. She calls me her big sister. We've talked for a few months through msn, cams, and mics and someday we do hope to meet.

I just moved to a new town and I'm homeschooled so I dont know anyone in this town yet, so most of my friends are people I've met online. I've talked to a lot of freaks though. One guy, who I thought was a great guy, asked if we could be like internet bf/gf, but then he started talking about getting married and then me moving in with him, his brother and sister, and his mom. Um, sorry but I sorta draw the line at me and my husband living with his mother. ;) He still talks to me saying stuff like, "I can't wait til we meet and get married" but I try my best to not talk back, lol.

But then there are people I've met who are my second family. Kristel (above, retrogirl82) is so warm and friendly and she was there for me when no one else was. I have another friend who, in my eyes, is my little sister. She calls me her big sister. We've talked for a few months through msn, cams, and mics and someday we do hope to meet.


AWWWWW, you are so SWEET! I love you, honey! I just want everyone to know that KristenJ is the sweetest and big-hearted (is that a word?) girl around! :) You're the best!

Wow, that's so strange about that guy! I'm glad you ran away :lol:

One guy, who I thought was a great guy, asked if we could be like internet bf/gf, but then he started talking about getting married and then me moving in with him, his brother and sister, and his mom. Um, sorry but I sorta draw the line at me and my husband living with his mother. ;) He still talks to me saying stuff like, "I can't wait til we meet and get married" but I try my best to not talk back, lol.

eeee...that's kinda freaky.

AWWWWW, you are so SWEET! I love you, honey! I just want everyone to know that KristenJ is the sweetest and big-hearted (is that a word?) girl around! :) You're the best!

Wow, that's so strange about that guy! I'm glad you ran away :lol:

AWW!! THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING EVER!! I love you too! You are totally the best! You made my day! :D

Yea, my mother wanted to KILL that guy! :lol:

AWW!! THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING EVER!! I love you too! You are totally the best! You made my day! :D

Yea, my mother wanted to KILL that guy! :lol:

I'm so glad it did! You made mine too! :happyface :bighug:

Hahahaa, I don't blame her!

eeee...that's kinda freaky.

LOL, yea he was a freak

I'm so glad it did! You made mine too! :happyface :bighug:

Hahahaa, I don't blame her!

Awe, thanx hun! :bighug:

I've had some good online friendships. Some bad, as a lot of them have fizzled out one way or the other. I'm very happy with my current online friends. I have had the opportunity to meet one, and she is awesome. :D

I've had some good online friendships. Some bad, as a lot of them have fizzled out one way or the other. I'm very happy with my current online friends. I have had the opportunity to meet one, and she is awesome. :D
:kiss:

:kiss:

:hug::kiss:

:hug::kiss:

Hey, I want in on this fun! :cuss:

:(

Hey, I want in on this fun! :cuss:

:(
Hey...no threesomes.

;)

:hug:

Hey...no threesomes.

;)

:hug:
CATHY! Sick! :eek: :lol: Group hug. :p ;) :lol:

:bighug:

Hey, I want in on this fun! :cuss:

:(

Hey, hey. Get in line, there's plenty of me to go around at least twice.

if it wasnt for online friends, I'd prolly have no friends at all...
That's definetly true for me.

I've had some friends offline, but not many people care about hanging around me. I'm shy and not really like most of the people my age who live near here.

I consider my online friends as real as any of the friends I've had offline, infact, they're better. And I'm not shy at all around them.

CATHY! Sick! :eek: :lol: Group hug. :p ;) :lol:

:bighug:
:lol:

Having friends has it's pluses and minuses whether it's friends online or offline. I'm thankful for the friendships I have.

Ever since I graduated from high school in '98 and went off to college it hasn't been the same with my offline friends. Now that I've been back in town for just over a year it doesn't seem as though it's really made that much difference. Out of my offline friendships what I miss most is the time I used to get to spend visiting with my bestfriend. She was kind of like a mentor and a friend. I got used to talking with my bestfriend everyday during 11th and 12th grade. When I had to graduate from high school and go off to college it was hard for me to adjust to not getting to talk to her all the time and visiting with her. After awhile I did adjust. I had very few friends through my years in school.

Whether it's offline or online it's hard to not take it personally if you're used to talking to people on a regular basis, ie: few times a week, once a day, a few times a day. If that changes it's hard to not take that personally. It makes you wonder if the sudden change is due to something you said or did. If you are used to talking to someone a few times a day and then you only hear from them once a day or once every couple days you do wonder what may have promoted the change so to speak. The reason might not have anything to do with you, but you can't know that if you don't ask. I guess it helps knowing that I'm not the only one who has thought that a friend offline or online might be upset if they don't hear from them or if the person seems distant in some way. I used to correspond with an offline friend on a regular basis, but the friend doesn't use e-mail anymore. So we occasionally correspond through letters in the mail. She doesn't live in the same city anymore and so I don't hear from her much.

Sometimes it can be really hard and sometimes really sad, but I would rather have friends and sometimes have a problem then to not have friends at all. There's a risk you take in any friendship regardless of whether it's offline or online. The alternative is having no friends at all and that's harder to go through life without any friends.


You are a great friend, Jenny. :)